XaiJu
Alice Winterhold
Alice Winterhold

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AMA

I have had a week which, in comparison to other weeks lately, has been rather shit. I'm a sensitive little weed so when my Facebook account got restricted I predictably wilted and have been floundering and flubbering my way around the floor of my bedroom trying to sort it out. Normally I would have a little vent about that, It's probably not a great use of my platforms to complain about things all the time but I tend to just write whats on my mind...

What's on my mind right now is that having a Facebook account restricted is a silly thing to go complaining to people about when the world is rapidly changing the way that it is. It's good to vent, but I don't think now is the time for that really, there's some real drastic stuff occurring. Now is the time for pleasant distraction.

I took some photos against my bedroom wall mural thing, and also a arty picture of the stream near the graveyard. I like that stream, often I have to fight the urge to walk up it. I know it probably just leads to more houses but my inner child is CONVINCED that it leads to a secret fairy garden where I will be immediately imprisoned and then shortly executed for tresspassing. It's still crazy to me the quality of photo you can take on a phone.

Anyway! I pledge that I will awnser any question commented on this post! You can ask me anything you want; my favourite food, my greatest fear, how often I can go without shedding my skin, don't be shy! You can also ask questions for Tech-Boy if you have any, I will have to dig him out of storage first though, pretty sure I saw him at the back of the kitchen cupboard.

I hope you're all well, LOVE YOU

AMA AMA AMA AMA AMA

Comments

Hello Alice, I hope I am not too late to submit a question here as random as it might be. Have you ever or do you ever play Tabletop Role Play games such as D&D and the like? If so, did you enjoy them and what systems have you tried out?

Trevor_M

Do you know “Strange Things Will Happen” by the Radio Dept.? THAT is a song that reminds me of you. “Dark quirky” would be underselling it but you know what I say? Look close enough at anything and it will break your heart.

Ron McFarlan

Love you, too!

Dmarty

Im tired so I didn't read the whole thing sorry, why did it get restricted?

Rylan Mac

I don't see Gender. Just other souls. I escaped abuse at the age of 18. I'm 53 this year. The scars will never heal. I hope yours do.

VINNIE LEADER

Hi Alice, I haven't left my house for over a month as I took all my Annual leave from work. I'm back to work on Monday. I'm dreading it. I love your part of the world as it has always been the same place as you visit. I won't say where it is in respect of you. My profile pic will give you a clue. Look East. Stay positive and just keep swimming. X

VINNIE LEADER

Love you too darling

Neil Mayes

Hello Alice, sorry, I'm a little late to this AMA party. What is something surprising to learn about you? Something like are you double-jointed, or perhaps your half-fae? If you could change something in the world, what would it be? Who or what inspires you? Cheers!

Eric SonOfHans

No... I am getting help though. I have a care coordinator and I'm working with a mental health team. You need to be stable to respond to therapy and I'm not there yet, but I do feel like I'm making progress at least. The move was very taxing on me; losing my old bedroom (which was my safe space) was very hard. Now I have a much better bedroom which I love and is perfect so I'm over that. Also, Living with TechBoy is really nice too.

Alice

Are you still seeing a therapist? How’s that going? do you think it’s helping? You seem happier, or at least more steady these days. Did the move help you? Therapy and melatonin type drugs really helped change my life.

Scotty Keister

Grass. You can stomp all over it and it still keeps growing. It hides under cement waiting for it to crack, then grows up like the truth towards the light

Alice

I did pretty good in school considering everything I had going on. I got hospitalised due to stress and had insomnia during my exams, it was so horrible but I got pretty good grades really. I would have gotten much better grades if i wasn't so sick and stuff obviously. School got worse for me as I got older as the bullying and isolation just gradually got worse and worse. I was pretty well able to figure out what I needed to know to pass exams, and I didn't want to fail my exams because then people would be upset with me

Alice

"how to be a human being" - glass animals, Specially the song Pork Soda, I recommend that. I like good movies, well written stuff I can think about afterwards... though I can't think of anything off the top of my head, oh, "The Substance" and "Poor Things" are a couple I watched recently that were good, and "Smile 2" was remarkably brilliant considering I thought the first one was a bit poo

Alice

I like "how to be a human being" - glass animals, listened to it on a loop for months in the past and still come back to it regularly. I don't know exactly what it is about it that makes me want it in my ears all the time, it's cheerful sounding?

Alice

At this point it's kinda become my purpose, keeps me going which is both sad and nice in a way... I get quite triggered by how cruel and ignorant people can be , which is why I’m so careful what I share on my stories as I know people will use that to hurt me if they think they can. I need to be careful, which is hard when you have problems with impulsively acting. When you make content, it’s kinda like art, you’re putting a chunk of yourself out on display and that make you vulnerable, really rough when you have rejection sensitivity and stuff.

Alice

You called yourself "a sensitive little weed" but weeds are persistent and resilient! My favorite weed is dandelions. What's yours?

kattphud

I've always wondered how you did in school? Very young, and then older too. I know you're unbelievably intelligent, but sometimes that doesn't work in school.

Rick

What music do you like to listen to? Bands or Artists you'd recommend? Also any movies you enjoy? Sorry if that's to many questions 😅

Bart Deroissart

Any album that helped you through tough times? I Recognizing that music can be highly personal and one person’s treasure is fluff to the next. I kind of hear Broadcast during your wistful strolls but that’s called projection, right? Rooting for you always, across a cold, indifferent ocean. 😊

Ron McFarlan

Hey - hope things are picking up for you this week. Is there anything specific which drives you to continue to deliver your social media content? And are there particular challenges you face in that world?

Joe Jennings-Bundy

No, well yes, but I like the other things about it too. I really love the story most of all. It really resonates with me

Alice

Thanks for all your responses.

Dodger

I like the idea of ghosts. I don't believe in them, it's a great concept and there's lots of great stories about them, but I don't believe that they're real. My brain is very stubborn on things like this and needs a lot of convincing, no matter how much i'd like to believe in much of the supernatural

Alice

Hi Alice, Thanks for accepting me on your shiny new FB account. Hope it'll be onwards and outwards with this one. I don't really have a question for you, just wanted to offer some distant support and to say thanks for making all the content you do. If I think of anything to ask I will pipe up a bit later. Really like the walls of your room, and maybe that's a stream of consciousness!

Andy White

Rdr...because you can tie ppl up?

Herbert

Unbelievably breathtaking

Herbert

Find people who truly care about you and let them be close to you. My fav game is rdr2

Alice

Any advice on climbing out of a hole of dark despair and what is your favourite video game

John Mitchell

Thanks for doing an AMA. If at all, in what way do you believe in ghosts? And this next one could be for either or both of you, what’s the furthest you’ve travelled?

Dodger

Not really. I should though... I keep rolling the idea of writing and illustrating a book. Might sound silly considering that I usually write and draw a load of filthy smut but I'd love to do a children's book or maybe some fairytale stories. I've written a few such drafts that I've kept to myself because I guess I feel like no one would care to read them. I met Tech-Boy through Tinder would you believe it. I was indulging in a bit of reckless behaviour after I escaped from my past life. Fortunately I ran into TB on there, he was the only guy I spoke to who was not only polite and earnest, but actually willing to meet up. It's kind of funny how many guys will send you a picture of their penis and tell you how aggressively they want to violate you like you're into it but then vanish if you ever suggest meeting. Anyway, we became friends right away, we're like, each other's people. He kinda wanted to keep a bit of emotional distance at the start but I think he's given up pretending now

Alice

You're a really talented artist. Have you, or do you want to do anything outside of your Patreon with your talent? You and Techboy are very sweet together. How did you two meet? It's really wonderful you're doing an AMA, thank you!

Sean Bennett

Good answers

Anthony Chapman

I don't know the awnser to that one, might not be possible until my internalised demons of the past are dealt with. They make constant, compelling and aggressive arguments to the contrary. My fav chocolate, hmm. I've defiantly had chocolate that I've eaten and gone "Yum, this is better than other chocolate", but never to the degree that I've taken note of it to find it at a later date. I think my favourite chocolate is likely just whatever chocolate is currently within gobbling range of my mouth

Alice

I highly recommend reading or listening to them. Frknstn was a good read. I listened to the others and was surprised how... slow they were.

ALFRED STUDWELL

How can we tell you you are awesome and inspiring in a way you will believe. Or favourite chocolates?

Anthony Chapman

My comfort food is Mc Donalds. I don't like it, it tastes bad and is weirdly expensive now and yet the smell of that grease-soaked paper bag just makes me feel like everything is going to be okay... for like 30 minutes or so. My favourite proper meal is when Techboy cooks steak, peppercorn sauce and roast vegetables, he's a really great cook.

Alice

That counts, I'll take it for sure. Even something as simple as your feet, its good to have at least something you feel somewhat okay about. I completely agree about tights as well, its unfortunate more people don't see that.

Notch8GEGaming

I love tights, they make my legs feel good and are very important when making an outfit, my natural leg colour doesn't go with every outfit. I guess what I hate the least about myself is my feet? Does that count? I think I have a nice vulva too, tidy

Alice

I'm thinking that it does look like a fairy stream,one that leads to good things.as to fb they are getting as bad as twitter used to be at who they let actually post...and by the way you can always rant away and vent all you like on here about all the normal vexatious things in life...

Richard

Tech-Boy: No. The last book I read was "Poilu" around 7 years ago. I'd like to read more but ehh He's got a way with words

Alice

I did start to write a biography a few years ago before I got on social media, kinda like an attempt to make sense of what happened to me. It ended up getting a bit to heavy and painful though. I've really only ever told a couple of very close friends any details about my life and they all remarked on how it would make for a gripping and painful read. Maybe I will one day, I think I need some therapy first though

Alice

My favourite self care thing is mind altering medica- I mean, it's washing my face at the end of the day. I have a little routine and it's like a peaceful wind down before I spent hours scrolling memes in bed putting off sleeping. And trans people; Yeah, I believe everyone has the right to be the way they know they should be. I really struggle with gender classification myself so I just treat everyone the way I think they would want to be treated, it’s not hard to do. I have a Trans friend who was kinda the reason I managed to escape from my past life of abuse, I love them

Alice

Oh" favourite foods what is your go to for like when depression mite be setting in? & your favourite main course ?

Rylan Mac

Two questions for you, first is do you like tights at all or feel they add anything to an outfit to make it come together a bit more? And two, I understand this question might be difficult, but what do you love about yourself the most?

Notch8GEGaming

Question for you Alice, Do you have any plans to write a book about your life? And a question for Techboy, do you like to read books? Have you read any classics? Like Frankenstein or Dracula or Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde?

ALFRED STUDWELL

Hiiiiii Alice! Two questions: what's your favourite self care thing to do for yourself. And what's your opinion on Trans people? <3 much love!

Terra Luna-mae


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