XaiJu
shencomix
shencomix

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I'm canning Unkillable, but I still wanna tell the story.

Hey peeps, so I said I would be doing a miniseries called Unkillable. Basically, here is what happened with that:

Sorry y'all. You have to admit though that it's pretty funny that Unkillable immediately died. That being said, here is the full story of Unkillable, in finished art, sketch, and writing:

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The Soldier walks, blindfold on, and grenade in hand, out into the barren battlefields. His legs step over countless abandoned weapons on the ground. The General observes from the distance. Suddenly, the General's eyes widen as he sees something. He begins yelling to the Soldier.

The Soldier hears that he's yelling SOMETHING. He turns his head back slightly. He has been clearly instructed not to take off the headphones or blindfold under any circumstances. So what is the General yelling?

What could be be yelling?...

While his head is turned, the Bioweapon takes the edge of the Soldier's blindfold, and begins to gently pull it off. The soldier screams and shuts his eyes tight. In a panic, he pulls the pin of the grenade he was instructed to throw -- a grenade, notably, with no lever, meaning that once the pin is pulled, there's only seconds until it explodes.

The pin falls to the ground, bouncing off of a rock with a sharp "tiiiiing" in the otherwise silent battlefield. The grenade begins to click down it's 20 second timer.

"tok .. tok .. tok .. tok"

The Soldier is left standing, now looking wide-eyed at the Bioweapon, the live grenade held between them like a bouquet at a wedding.

After a few seconds, the Bioweapon's gaze shifts from the Soldier's eyes to the grenade. Still smiling, the Bioweapon squats down so that the grenade is at eye level, like he is talking to a toddler.

Grenade: "tok .. tok .. tok .. tok"

Bioweapon: "You don't need to blow up, you know."

Grenade: "tok .. tok .. tok .. tok"

Bioweapon: "It's okay. Even if you tell my our message quietly, I'll still listen."

Grenade: "tok ..."

Bioweapon: " "

Grenade: " "

Grenade: "Please leave."

The Bioweapon stands back up, suddenly rigid as a plank and does an enthusiastic salute.

Bioweapon: "Aye aye!"

He extends one leg forward, swings it around himself to spin his whole body into the opposite direction, and begins walking away.

Then, for a moment, he stops. He turns his head, and locks eyes directly with the General, who has been observing through the window of a bunker at a safe distance. The General's eyes widen in panic. The Bioweapon holds his usual calm, innocent expression.

The General doesn't hear what the Bioweapon says next, before turning back and continuing to walk away. Even in across a silent battlefield, his voice just didn't carry that far. Only by reading his lips could he have any idea:

"I'll miss you."

Comments

Honestly I wasn't sold on from the first page, but seeing the total vision makes it a lot more compelling. As a reader, I think if you opened with the chill looking guy on the battlefield, then came to the scene with the general declaring that this guy has the power of friendship, the story has a bit more of a foundation to launch from. Thanks for sharing this!

Nicholas Garza

I love this story-line, and I'm super happy to see slow wind-up ideas. I was like "huh?!" but I'm also like "In Shen I Trust". :)

James Mitchell

this is such a nice and succinct way to phrase it

Hal πŸ”†

I WANT MORE

Hal πŸ”†

Some stories just aren't social media-shaped, but that's no statement about the actual quality of the thing!

Kevin Vognar

It's a pity that this won't be released as a comic. I honestly think it's pretty powerful, but sadly we don't make the rules. Thanks for sharing the whole story!

Pulgoso Blues

I wonder if it's partly a timing thing? Maybe anything referencing soldiers and conflict is just a hard sell to our demographic rn. Your soldiers definitely provoked a response in me beyond the standard 'yay, new Shen art' one, and that must be partly due to current geopolitics and media. I'm not even sure I could verbalise what that response was, but it was definitely there and I guess it doesn't take much for people to just hold off from clicking the share button. Not us here ofc, I mean normies who don't ride the Shenbike.

Jon Barker

I appreciate that you share your metrics and decisions based upon them with us. A bummer that this premise didn’t take flight, but you will improve and continue! 🫑

Noman

Aw, but that was so adorable though.

Invarus

It's a really fun comic. I think it just needed the first 8 panels released at once. You don't really know what's happening from the first 4 but I think by the end of the full 8 people would be on board.

GZR

I'm so sad this one has, in fact, BEEN KILLED 😭 Thank you for at least giving us the rest of the story, I was really looking forward to it. I'll miss you too, BioweaponπŸ’” (⁠´⁠;⁠ω⁠;⁠`⁠)

Limi

Agreed! I am glad I got to experience it even if it wasn't in its final form!

Billy (aka siatabiri)

This was really good, thank you

Hugh Mann

OKAY BUT THIS IS LITERALLY SO GOOD THO Sorry that Unkillable got killed. I know from my own work what it’s like when it comes to having a strong idea that doesn’t get received like you expect for it to be. It doesn’t diminish that this was a strong and creative idea!!!

J. C.


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