Happy Holidays

Hello my parasocial friends! Just a note to say hello and give you a virtual hug :) I know this can be a hard time for queer folks, so I came to share a little “it gets better” moment for anyone struggling. Last week I went to Jen’s annual Christmas party with her whole dad’s side of the family and some close family friends. All told I believe about 25 people were there. Every year her mom and her mom’s best friend carol (who told me I had beautiful teeth) pick a theme, like Morrocan or Shaker and make Christmas dinner for everyone. There’s also a cake to celebrate Jen’s birthday, my favorite part. Jen and her brother are the baby cousins of this side, so her older cousins are about 40 and already have several children, including Julia who is a non stop hugger.

There’s a big yankee swap game, I’ve now been to two of these, and it seems to me like the real winner is the person who brings the most ridiculous and awesome gift. Such winners include a JS Bach bust which now sits on the Davis family mantle. This year it was a paper towel holder shaped as a frog, laying on its back, suggestively flinging one VERY long leg into the air (that’s where you put the paper towel roll).

One of Jen’s cousins is some sort of HR exec and sat on an LGBT group at her work and joked around with us the same way we do on the pod, inclusively but also a little tongue in cheek, with us. I think someone called her manly and she was like “well that’s just your perception of what a man is, so that’s on you!” Her friend checked out Jen’s episode of the podcast because she felt she couldn’t (good call).

Julia, the baby, crawled into my lap a few times (I am on birth control right now, prepping for egg freezing, so this made me want to cry, obviously) and I spotted her dad taking a video of us. And that made me so happy.

Today I am headed uptown to sing Christmas songs that I do not know (I never went to church or synagogue) with my best friend Sam at St John The Divines Cathedral (stunning and worth checking out).

Just a note that whether you’re with family or chosen family, you can create a beautiful life as a queer person. It is possible! Just a few years ago I was in a closeted relationship and I couldn’t wrap my brain around how I could have a life like this. But as with anything else it just takes time and effort. And things do change and get better. Sending you all my love and hope. Thank you for supporting me and my family.