Eggplants, Hawks, and other signs of good luck - Chapter One [NSFW]

This is my new year fic for this year, I've split it into 3 chapters because it got a bit long lol

This chapter is IzuKatsu but there are... implications for what's gonna happen next chapter, so you've been warned ;)

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Izuku pulled the magazine from a grocery bag, a little surprised to see it there. Neither he nor Katsuki were big fans of celebrity gossip and the like, so it was rare for them to buy into the magazines full of basically nothing else. Katsuki must have seen something on the cover that enticed him - an article of interest, maybe an interview with a hero? But nothing jumped out at Izuku immediately.

Weird.

“Hey, Kacchan?” he called, glancing over his shoulder at where Katsuki was carrying in the last load of bags. “Why’d you buy this one?”

Katsuki’s face turned bright red when he saw the magazine in Izuku’s hand, snatching for it but missing by a mile when Izuku jerked it away, a smirk crossing his lips.

“What is it, Kacchan?” he asked, turning away to keep it from him. “What don’t you want me to see, hmmm?”

“I swear to God, nerd, if you don’t hand it over-”

“What?” Izuku cut him off, looking back to raise an eyebrow at him. “You’ll fight me for it? And blow up your precious magazine in the process? That seems a bit silly, Kacchan.”

He hopped up onto the bench, the magazine safely wedged under his ass, and Katsuki gave him a look that was almost pitiful.

“Photos,” he grumbled, ducking his gaze. “I just… Forget it, keep it, I don’t care.”

“Photos?” Izuku prompted. “Of what? Or who, I guess.”

“Who do you think?”

Izuku finally started to catch on, amazed with himself for taking so long, but Katsuki’s pink cheeks just spurred him on.

“Is it the New Year spread?” he asked knowingly. “The… Sexy one?”

Katsuki nodded, just once, and Izuku grinned as he retrieved it from beneath him, still keeping it carefully out of Katsuki’s reach – this time, though, he noticed that Katsuki kept his eyes averted, didn’t bother to fight for it.

“Let’s finish unpacking the groceries,” he suggested, flipping through the pages. “Then we can take a look together. Sound good?”

“Together?” Katsuki asked, eyebrows knitting together. “Me and you?”

“Yeah! That’s a thing couples do, right? Look at porn together?”

“It’s not porn.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Izuku shrugged, setting the magazine aside. “I guess we’ll find out soon enough.”

He slid down from the counter and returned to unloading bags, though he couldn’t help but notice the way Katsuki eyed him warily as they worked, as if he might be plotting something.

Something other than looking at sexy photos with his boyfriend, that is.

He stacked boxes and cartons in the fridge neatly, opened cloth sacks to pour out the fruit and vegetables, even helped Katsuki wash them all meticulously before he put them away in the fridge drawers. It was just like any other grocery day, calm and peaceful and domestic, even though a sense of tension still lay beneath, still made Katsuki shoot him confused looks when he thought Izuku wasn’t looking. Izuku just smiled away sweetly, ever the innocent boyfriend, until finally everything was away, and Izuku was picking up the magazine again.

“Did you look in the store?” he asked, offering it back to Katsuki.

“God no!” Katsuki scowled, grabbing it before Izuku could change his mind. “Like I’d do that shit in public!”

“Good, then we can see it together,” Izuku grinned. “I wanna hear which bits you like the best.”

“You’re such a nerd.”

“And you love me,” Izuku laughed. “Come on, let’s have some fun.”

Katsuki stared for a moment as Izuku walked away, stunned to see him head down the hallway instead of across to their little living area. He’d expected them to just sit on the couch and flip through the pages, but Izuku wanted to take him to the bedroom?

As soon as he got control over his feet again, he followed, watching Izuku climb up onto the bed and get settled in comfortably against the pillows. He hurried to join him, not even protesting when Izuku wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him closer. Izuku had always been a cuddly thing, even back when they were kids having sleepovers, always waking up draped over Katsuki’s side and pulling at his fluffy hair. Nothing had changed about that, when they got together – the moment they began sharing a bed Izuku had turned back into a clingy toddler, always tangling their limbs together and burying his face in Katsuki’s hair or shoulder. It was a wonder he could still walk in the morning, with how twisted all his muscles must have gotten, but it made the nerd happy so who was Katsuki to say no?

“Do you wanna read the articles first?” Izuku offered, flipping to the first page. “Apparently there’s a great one about tips to keep your eyeliner in place all day long that you might like.”

“Fuck off, I practically wrote the book on that.”

Izuku grinned, but took his hand away obediently, letting Katsuki flip to the pages in the center, the ones he really cared about. They started off pretty tame, just a shot of Hawks leaning against a wall with his jacket open, shirtless underneath. He had gorgeous abs, Izuku had to admit – then again Hawks was a hot blond man, what was not to like? He gave Katsuki a minute to stare, letting his eyes rake over the image and take it all in, then leaned in closer with a little grin stretching across his lips.

“Do you think he’d share his workout tips with us?”

“Shut the hell up, you’re not meant to be analysing his workout schedule.”

“What am I meant to be doing, hm?” he teased, fingers toying with Katsuki’s waistband. “I thought we were here to admire a handsome man, are his abs not included in that admiration?”

“Ugh.”

Izuku smiled, shifting his hand up underneath Katsuki’s t-shirt and feeling the equally taut abs that lay beneath.

“You know I have a weakness for my strong blonds and their sexy abs and chests.”

“I thought you had a weakness for me.”

“I do,” Izuku grinned, leaning in to nip at Katsuki’s neck. “But I’m allowed more than one weakness in my life, aren’t I?”

“Yeah,” Katsuki grumbled, cheeks flushed again. “I guess so.”

“You wanna keep looking?”

Katsuki nodded, his hand trembling a little as he turned the page, and Izuku could only continue to smile. He had Katsuki wrapped around his little finger and he knew it – loved it.

“Fuck,” Katsuki hissed, when his eyes fell on a much less clothed Hawks.

With his jacket fully shed this time, Hawks hooked his thumbs into his waistband, dragging it sinfully low to give them a peek of bright red boxers over the hem – Izuku’s favourite colour. Sure enough, Izuku hummed his appreciation when he saw, and Katsuki didn't dare to tear his eyes away from the page.

“Looks good on him,” Izuku said knowingly, running his fingertip over the page. “Look at those shoulders, too.”

“Yeah, he’s hot,” Katsuki agreed. “You know I think so, though.”

“I do,” Izuku grinned. “But it’s fun to hear you say it.”

“Why?”

Izuku shrugged, tapping his finger on the next page instead of answering, and Katsuki lost a quiet whine when he dragged his attention across. It seemed like every page took away more clothing from the man, and Hawks looked increasingly smug as the coverings disappeared, letting more and more skin and muscle show. 

Clad only in his boxers, Hawks looked back over his shoulder at the camera, showing off the sculpted back muscles that supported his huge wings. Katsuki couldn’t help but wonder what those wings felt like, whether they were soft and warm like Izuku’s hair, or rougher like the callouses on their skin.

“You like the wings?” Izuku asked. “Sorry, I can’t do much about that. Easy enough to buy new clothes or work out a certain muscle group, but I can’t offer to sprout wings for you.”

“You don’t need to change,” Katsuki growled, grabbing him in a headlock. “Just because Hawks is hot, doesn’t mean you aren’t.”

“You think I’m hot?”

“I tell you that every damn day, nerd, stop trying to make me say it more.”

“But I like hearing it!”

“You’re such a pain,” Katsuki huffed, leaning over to kiss his hair all the same. “Next page?”

“Yeah! Think he’ll be nude?”

“Why, you wanna see his dick?”

“Isn’t that what we’re here for?”

Katsuki rolled his eyes, releasing his grip on Izuku in favour of turning the page, but when the image hit his eyes, his brain ceased to function. Izuku, on the other hand, burst out laughing – shitty asshole that he was. 

He leaned in closer, eyeing every curve of smooth skin, only the tip of a scarlet wing giving him an ounce of modesty – not that he needed it, honestly. Hawks had never been someone Izuku would call modest. But the double-page spread of Hawks laid out on a bed, only his own feathers covering his bare junk, was... More than he’d expected. Honestly, kids could pick up those magazines if they wanted to, how did they get away with selling that thing in grocery stores??

“Fucking hot,” Izuku mused, watching the torment that coursed through Katsuki’s features. “Hawks too.”

“Shut the hell up.”

“It must have been really hard to position that photo. Imagine if even one feather had been out of place, they’d have had to start over.”

“Seriously, shut up.”

“I don’t see any pubic hair,” he continued, leaning in closer to look at the edges of the wing. “Think he waxed just for this, or does it all the time?”

“I see what you’re doing, nerd.”

“Me? Plot? Never.” Izuku grinned, kissing his cheek fondly. “You think I would use this tiny weak spot to exploit my agenda?”

“Always. And it’s not weak, you damn nerd.”

“Okay, okay, not a weak spot,” Izuku conceded. “Just… Uh… A soft spot for him?”

“I’m not getting waxed.”

“I didn’t say you should! I just think Hawks looks hot, that’s all.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Izuku’s phone buzzed beside him, and he tore himself away to check it, letting Katsuki have a moment to just stare at the photo, his brain short-circuiting every time he looked too closely. He’d known since they were teenagers that Katsuki had a huge celebrity crush on the guy, it wasn’t a surprise or a concern to him, but he wasn’t sure he’d understood exactly how much Katsuki liked him until that very moment. Not that Izuku could blame him, he certainly perved at his own fair share of heroes.

“Um, Kacchan?” he began hesitantly, staring at the alert on his phone. “You might need to check your messages.”

“What? Why?”

“Just uh… Take a look.”

Grumbling, Katsuki reached for his silent phone – he refused to be interrupted by their friends and family when he was off-duty, always had it set to just pop the notifications up in silence for him to check when he felt like it. He raised an eyebrow when he saw the massive list of notifications, though, everyone from Kirishima and Kaminari to his publicist and even a few random usernames he assumed were fans, all trying to get in touch with him suddenly.

“Something happen?” he mumbled, opening the one from his publicist first. “Shitty article about me swearing too much or something again?”

His jaw dropped when he saw the photo, taken only hours ago as he stood in line at a check out, hood pulled up to cover his hair, but distinctive eyes on full display. The caption was simple and innocent, just a “look who I saw at the grocery store!!”, but the photo…

Katsuki knew it was going to be bad, and he hadn’t even scrolled down to the replies yet.

In his hand was a magazine with a bright cover, so innocuous at first glance, but Katsuki knew exactly what was inside.

Because it currently lay open in his lap, destroying every braincell he’d ever had, in favour of his mind just chanting horny horny horny at him instead of thinking.

“Here we go,” Katsuki groaned, taking a moment to hold his head in his hands before he continued. “Do you wanna just… Tell me?”

“Would you prefer that?”

“Maybe. I don’t know.”

Despite the part of him that screamed to just get the censored version from Izuku, he scrolled down.

The first few messages were what he expected – teenage girls telling the photographer how lucky she was, for the most part. Wishing they’d seen him, asking if she’d gotten an autograph or a photo – she hadn’t, Katsuki lamented. The ones who wanted autographs were generally a good bunch, but the ones who took photos of him from across the room instead of just saying hi were a different breed.

Then, the fateful message – with thousands of likes and shares.

“Isn’t that the magazine with the Hawks spread?”

“Omg!! @Hawks lol!!”

Katsuki tossed his phone away, groaning as he hid his face in his hands, casting himself into darkness.

“Kill me,” he muttered. “Just… Fuckin’ kill me.”

“Kirishima says ‘@Hawks @Dynamite is your biggest fan, it’s just one more piece of merch he had to own’,” Izuku read. “I guess he thinks that’s damage control, or something.”

“Piece of shit.”

“I shouldn’t read you what Kaminari wrote, then.”

“Oh God. Read it to me while I build up enough sweat for an explosion worthy of his bullshit.”

“He said ‘@Hawks yo he has a bf but he’s cool, you two should hang lawl’.”

“Yep, gonna kill the bastard.”

“And Hawks says ‘@Dynamite I’m honoured, bet no one would object if you wanted to do one too - I certainly wouldn't! I’ll give you the name of my photographer’.”

For a moment Katsuki was silent, slowly turning his head to look for the little snicker that Izuku was waiting to set free, but instead he just found shining eyes watching him, waiting for his response.

“What?” he asked, voice strangely quiet even to himself.

“You want me to read it again?”

Katsuki snatched the phone from his hand, expecting to see a blank screen, but sure enough…

"There’s no way he wrote that." Katsuki scowled, shoving it back into Izuku’s hands. “It’s just some shitty publicist playing off the photo for more attention.”

“What about this follow-up asking ‘which one is your favourite?’ then?”

“Fuck off.”

“I’m serious, Kacchan!” Izuku laughed. “Should I message him?”

“Fuck no!”

“I’m gonna tweet at him.”

“Why?”

“I’m your boyfriend! I've gotta defend your honour!”

“What the fuck, nerd.”

Izuku hummed as he contemplated it, leaning back against Katsuki’s shoulder comfortably. He dragged the magazine over while Katsuki was busy moping, taking another look at the spread that made his stomach swirl a little, and the perfectly positioned wing that he kind of wished was less perfect.

“Do you wanna fuck him?” he asked finally.

“What the fuck kind of question is that?” Katsuki demanded, face burning when he tore his gaze up to Izuku’s smirk. “I’m dating you nerd, are you trying to make me… I don’t know, reaffirm our relationship or some shit? You know I love you.”

“I know, and I love you too,” Izuku agreed. “But do you want to fuck him?”

“Why the hell would I fuck someone who isn’t my boyfriend?”

“Oh, no, I meant all three of us.”

Katsuki gawked at him, lost for words, and Izuku’s smirk stretched a little wider.

“That looks like a yes,” he hummed, glancing at his phone again. “I’d do it. He’s my type, you know that.”

“So you want to fuck him?”

“Well I wouldn’t say no. Only with you, though. I don’t care about being with him, but being with you and him sounds pretty damn hot.”

“Are you testing me?”

“You know I wouldn’t do that. Here, I’ll tweet at him.”

“Saying what? ‘hey dude you wanna come over for a threesome?’ What the fuck, nerd, you can't do that.”

“Don’t be silly Kacchan! I’ll be subtle!”

The tip of his tongue poked out the corner of his mouth as he typed, concentrating hard, and Katsuki reached for his own phone to read the message.

“@Hawks The Boyfriend here! We both liked the centre spread the best!!”

Izuku quickly silenced his phone when the storm of alerts began pinging, thousands of fans freaking out over the interaction – honestly, they were all heroes in the same country, it wasn’t like they’d never talked before, but for some reason the fans always went nuts for it – even when it was just one of his high school friends!

He swiped away the notifications as they came in, hunting for the mute buttons, but when the private message popped up he froze immediately. There it was, in bold letters on his notification screen – New Message from Hawks.

“Hey, Kacchan?” he said quietly, tapping it to open the message. “You know how Kaminari does that weird thing where he talks in all emojis?”

“What about it?”

Izuku turned his phone screen, and for a moment Katsuki just stared in silence, before his eyes slowly rose to meet Izuku’s.

“Do you think he was lying when he told us what the eggplant was for?”

“I fucking hope not.”

[Chapter 2]