Trees Chapter 318 I Will Make Sure He Never Comes Back!

"You're full of crap!"

Hashirama's furious voice was heard from the other end of the phone. It was obvious that the God of Shinobi had almost lost his mind after losing 32 games in a row.

Hashirama's defense was truly broken.

It's bad enough that Konohamaru could easily deal with him, but he was also tortured by that ‘NineImmortalEmperor’ for an entire night a few days ago.

But now, this kid with the username ‘My Father Can Rival A Nation’ was also bullying him.

Not only that, but the kid kept trash-talking while fighting, spouting nonsense every time the ultimate Ninjutsu cutscene played...

"All your power is meaningless before my fathers!"

‘What kind of bullshit was that?!’

‘‘Fathers’? Since when did he have multiple fathers.’

Hashirama was fuming. He had endured it for so long, and now he was determined to teach this little brat a lesson.

But what happened next?

This kid actually had the audacity to impersonate Konohamaru?!

Sure, Hashirama might be a bit naive...

But he wasn’t that stupid!

Mitsuki, who had been controlling his character, froze for a second when he heard Hashirama’s response.

‘Oh no!’

‘My brilliant plan was actually seen through by this old man?!’

Mitsuki's eyes darted around before a new scheme formed in his mind. Lowering his voice, he immediately started trash-talking into the mic.

"F** you, you absolute dumb**!"

"You can't even play the game well but you tried to pull a real-life meetup? What a loser!"

"Three days from now, I’ll be waiting for you at the Land of Earth’s border, you old geezer!"

After hurling those insults, Mitsuki quickly closed the game and opened his alternate messaging app.

He scrolled through his hundreds of contacts before selecting one labeled ‘This Old Man’s Back Can’t Handle It Anymore’.

Clearing his throat, he prepared his best ‘helpless little girl’ voice and sent a voice message.

"Wuuu... wuuu..."

"Big brother... someone said they’re going to hurt me..."

For three whole minutes, Mitsuki’s tearful, high-pitched whining left everyone else in the room questioning reality.

Naruto’s eyebrows furrowed deeply, and suddenly, he felt like Sasuke hadn’t hit this kid hard enough back then.

‘What an impressive fake girl voice!’

‘What a masterful plan to sic Hashirama on some poor bastard!’

‘And this kid still had time for online scams?!’

Naruto was already thinking about how to tattle to Sasuke later.

Meanwhile, Tsunade rubbed her chin, wondering if Konohamaru’s recent financial success had anything to do with this.

Minato and Kushina, on the other hand, were completely lost.

From the moment they entered, they couldn’t understand what this kid, who looks so much like Orochimaru, is even doing.

‘But...’

‘The voice on the other end just now was the Shodaime Hokage, Senju Hashirama, right?!’

As the group stood there in stunned silence, the other party had already received the voice message.

Mitsuki was so engrossed in his phone that he didn’t notice the glowing red death flags flashing above his head.

"Hmph! They really don't know how to live! Who is so tired of living that he dares to treat my Tsuki-chan like this!?"

"Don't cry, Tsuki-chan. This old man will definitely teach that guy a lesson."

When Mitsuki heard this, he grinned widely, his expression a mix of excitement and mockery.

"Mhm~ That guy even challenged me to meet at the Land of Earth’s border in three days..."

"He even said he was going to beat me to death..."

"I’m so scared~"

Mitsuki’s voice shifted into an exaggerated, cutesy tone—the kind that could ‘melt hearts and bring tears to listeners’ eyes’.

But the fists of everyone around him were already clenched.

‘What the hell?!’

‘What kind of kid can make such a disgusting voice?!’

‘And more importantly…’

‘Who the hell would fall for such an obvious scam?!’

Everyone was puzzled, but they underestimated the sheer destructive power of online romance scams on old men.

The aged voice on the other end spoke again, accompanied by the sound of a fist slamming on a table.

"Hmph! Let’s see what this bastard is planning!"

"Tsuki-chan, just wait, I will definitely help you deal with him."

"If he dares to show up at the Land of Earth’s border..."

"I’ll make sure he never leaves alive!"

Their conversation continued, with Mitsuki even throwing in some cringey pickup lines…

"Do you know what my biggest flaw is? It’s missing you~"

"I’m on an IV drip… do you know what kind? It’s the ‘missing you at night’ kind~"

Kushina and Tsunade felt nauseous and retched after hearing this, but Minato's eyes lit up slightly, as if he was taking notes.

The conversation finally ended with the other party transferring five million Ryo to Mitsuki.

After that, Mitsuki accepted the transfer and even cursed the other party as a poor bastard.

But honestly...

The way he pocketed that cash was eerily similar to his father, Sasuke.

"Mitsuki!"

"What the hell are you doing now?!"

Naruto scowled and snatched the phone from Mitsuki's hands. The boy instinctively tried to grab it back, but Naruto pressed a palm against his face, holding him at arm's length.

When Mitsuki finally caught sight of that familiar yellow hair, he stumbled back in fear as memories of past beatings flooded his mind.

Mitsuki's lips trembled and he began to stutter when he spoke, "Y-Yellow... Uncle Naruto..."

"H-How... How did you get here?"

"Hahaha... You should've told me you were coming... I-I'll go get my dad!"

Years of getting his ass kicked had given Mitsuki an impeccable survival instinct.

Realizing he was about to be on the receiving end of another beating, he immediately tried to bolt for the side door.

When Naruto heard this, he rolled his eyes at him and effortlessly grabbed the back of his collar.

‘Like hell you’re running off to tattle to Sasuke…’

‘You were so glued to that screen you didn’t even notice us standing here for the past five minutes!’

"Mitsuki, didn’t I warn you last time to stop messing around with this stuff?!"

Naruto raised his voice, ready to lay into him, but the kind-hearted Tsunade couldn’t bear to see a child suffer, and even more so to see her wallet get lighter, so she quickly stepped in to stop him.

"Oh, come on, Naruto, he’s just a kid..."

"What's wrong with a kid being a little naughty?"

"Let it go... Let’s go find Orochimaru first."

Naruto fell silent after hearing this. He was afraid that if he tried to argue, Tsunade would probably say this in the next second: "Have you forgotten how much of a troublemaker you were as a kid?"

And then Kushina would definitely start questioning him.

The last thing he needed was his mom tying him up again.

Sensing the danger, Naruto forced a smile, let go of the struggling Mitsuki, and even straightened the kid’s collar for him.

‘Damn it!’

‘Mitsuki, just you wait!’

‘Once I find your father Sasuke, he’s going beat the crap out of you!’

"Sister, you are so nice!"

When Mitsuki saw Tsunade coming to his rescue, he looked up and hit her with the sweetest line, making the fifty-something-year-old kunoichi burst into laughter.

"Hahahahaha..."

"You’re such a smooth talker, kid."

Tsunade covered her mouth and chuckled, her eyebrows and eyes were slightly curved with laughter.

"Hey, kid, have you seen a white-haired old man?"

"White-haired old man?"

Mitsuki was stunned for two seconds, and the image of his wise teacher, who taught him how to say sweet words, flashed through his mind.

He stretched out his hand and pointed toward the side door.

"Sister, are you talking about that white-haired sage?"

"If you go out and turn right, you’ll find him in the warehouse at the end of the hall."

When Mitsuki said this, there was some confusion in his eyes and he said a few more words to himself.

"Though I’m not sure what he and my dad are doing in there..."

"Uncle Kabuto wouldn’t let me in."

Tsunade’s eyes narrowed. She cracked her knuckles, her expression darkening as she strode toward the side door.

Kushina followed closely behind, and the two disciples of the white-haired old man, who were also father and son, looked at each other and followed after them.

But Minato couldn’t shake the feeling that the voice from the kid’s phone sounded familiar.

‘Strange...’

‘That voice... almost sounded like Onoki’s?’