On The Rebound - Ch. 4 (Collateral Side Story, Patreon Exclusive)

On The Rebound – Chapter 4

Stephen had told him to head back home since he still had plenty of work to do at the office. Hans had gotten so used to calling the man’s home his own, that he found everything normal. He was even whistling a happy tune as he went through the door.

“Who the hell are you?” a haughty annoying voice took him by surprise and he almost dropped the grocery bag.

A guy wearing nothing but a towel around his waist, his hair still wet from a shower, was staring at him. Hans didn’t need a memo to know who that was. His smiled was crooked as he spoke.

“Oh, you must be Daniel. The douchebag.”

The man’s eyes grew wide. It was clear that Hans’s direct attack was not leaving him unaffected.

“Do you have a hearing problem, pal?” he showed teeth. “I asked you who the fuck you are.”

“Technically, you asked me who the hell I am,” Hans said promptly.

“Whatever. Beat it. You’re overextending your welcome. Stephen doesn’t like when one night stands think they’re something more.”

And Hans could tell the douchebag was lying through his teeth.

“I think that the one who should be on his way is you,” Hans didn’t waver and marched towards the kitchen to place the groceries in the fridge.

“Listen, pal,” the man followed him.

“No, you listen,” Hans closed the fridge door abruptly. “You left, Stephen moved on. Now beat it. You don’t want him to come home and find you here. Spare him the unnecessary drama, at least. He deserves at least this much from your part.”

“And what made you an expert in what Stephen deserves?” the douchebag continued. “A few tumbles in the hay?”

“What? Was it so rarely that you slept with him that you think he could not score with another guy for more than one night or two? No wonder he doesn’t let me leave the bed,” Hans crossed his arms and stared the other man up and down. “Could you please remove yourself from the kitchen? The sight of those love handles is ruining my appetite.”

The man was in shock; that could be told from a single look at him. Hans wanted to laugh, but the truth was he was pretty annoyed.

“Go change into your clothes, and leave the spare key you used on your way out.”

“Who do you think you are to order me around? You have no idea ...”

“About how you screwed Stephen over? I have all the idea I need.”

“That’s it. I’m calling Stephen right now. He will sort his mess,” the guy disappeared from the kitchen.

“He has a tough day at work. He doesn’t need any more trouble from the likes of you,” Hans shouted after the man.

“I don’t care what the fuck you think,” Daniel spat and rummaged through his clothes spread all over the bed.

Hans was certain he would want to burn the sheets now that they were tainted by that guy’s stench. 

“You better put that phone down,” he warned Daniel.

“Or what? Are you going to beat me up?”

“Although it would make me extreme pleasure to do that, I won’t. I don’t think Stephen would appreciate having to wash blood stains from the carpet.”

The look on Daniel’s face was precious.

“Are you threatening me that you would beat me bloody? I warn you, I am a lawyer, and you ...”

“Beat you bloody? Do you think I have the instincts of a Neanderthal, like you? Yes, I know about your sexcapades. I think it’s enough to punch you once and you’ll start whining. Actually, you might cry if I take a step towards you.”

He had no intention to act on those threats, but it felt good to torment the douchebag. Daniel was slowly withdrawing, trying to put as much distance between the two of them as he could. The guy was scared shitless, and Hans found it pretty amusing.

“Don’t take another step!” the guy shouted. “Damn, I had no idea Stephen went for the likes of you! When did he get into the muscled type? For the record, he hates that.”

Hans flexed his biceps in jest, just to make the man flinch again.

“Well, these days it seems like he’s more into beef cake, then into lard ...something, or whatever you are,” he grimaced while he gestured for the man’s naked body.

“That’s it; I’m calling Stephen,” Daniel threatened.

“Ok, go ahead. I want to hear how he gives you the boot.”

Daniel surely wanted Hans out of the room, but that was not going to happen. The man clutched his phone.

“Hi honey, it’s me,” Daniel began speaking. “Well, I’m at home, and imagine my surprise to find this Neanderthal ...”

The guy even stole words from others. Hans growled low in his chest, making Daniel shoot a nervous look at him.

“Hello? Honey? Are you still there? Yes, I’ll be waiting.”

The guy didn’t seem pleased at all while putting his phone away. He threw a murderous look in Hans’s direction.

“Could you leave the room? Or better yet, the entire house?” he glared at Hans.

“And lose all the fun? No way,” Hans shrugged. “How about you slip into something less comfortable? Like your clothes?”

“Why would I do that? I’m home,” the man said and plopped himself on the bed.

“It’s so funny when they’re delusional,” Hans shook his head. “Good, then I’ll even the odds.”

He began removing his clothes. The man stared at him in disbelief.

“What are you doing?” Daniel asked, unsteady in his voice.

“What does it look like? I’m helping Stephen make the right choice once he gets here.”

Hans didn’t miss the sudden lust in the man’s eyes as he went for the pants, too. Wasn’t Daniel the biggest whore on the planet? 

“What? Are you going to jump my bones? Do you think you have the time for a quickie until Stephen gets home?”

Daniel looked like he was considering the possibility. Hans pushed down his underwear, too, and smirked when he saw the guy’s eyes grow wide. He grabbed his manhood and flaunted it a little.

“Yeah, dream on. This is only for satisfying Stephen, not douchebags like you.”

The douchebag chose to ignore him. Hans leaned against the wall and stared at him. Too bad the digital clock on the nightstand made no sound. It would have just made perfect the silence that stretched to minutes, as the two rivals weighed one another.

“What on earth are you two doing?” Stephen’s voice made him almost jump when the door to the bedroom flew open.

The guy looked disheveled like he had climbed the stairs, instead of taking the elevator. His eyes were a bit wild, as they moved from one man to another.

“I was just explaining to your ex a few reasons why you chose me,” Hans shrugged.

Stephen didn’t seem amused.

“Hans, please, get some clothes on,” he said. “And you, why did you come back?” he turned towards Daniel.

“What do you mean? This is my home, too.”

“Was,” Hans chimed in.

Stephen turned towards him.

“Hans, please, a bit of time out.”

Hans could not believe his ears.

“What?” he murmured.

“Let’s just, you know, take a little break from the ... you know,” Stephen said nervously.

Hans frowned. Even without looking, he knew the douchebag on the bed was now sporting a satisfied grin. He leaned towards Stephen and whispered into his ear.

“And where should I go? The kitchen? Out on the stairs? Or out of your life?”

Stephen blinked a few times and looked away. 

“No, I don’t want you gone,” he whispered back. “I just … need to sort this mess, and I don’t exactly need an audience. Or anyone to witness my embarrassment.”

“I think I’ll stay, then,” Hans said sharply. “It’s my right, after all. I can live with seeing you embarrassed. It cannot be harder than …”

His voice dropped lower as his lips caressed Stephen’s ear. The man blushed profusely, but then straightened up.

“All right. You can stay. But please put some pants on.”

“I can hear you, people,” Daniel complained from the bed. “Just kick this idiot out the door already.”

Stephen hesitated for a second, and then put his chin up. 

“No. He will stay. It is his right.”

“Are you a parakeet? You just repeat what he told you.”

“Stephen has enough common sense to know what to repeat,” Hans sneered, as he pulled up his pants.

“Hans, please. I will handle this. On my own,” Stephen exhaled and turned towards his ex. “What are you doing here, Daniel? You said we were through.”

Daniel just shrugged.

“And did you really think that? C’mon, honey, you cannot be that stupid …”

“What did you call him?” Hans curled his hands into fists and almost took a step towards the guy.

Stephen caught his arm.

“Darling, please, I can handle him.”

There was a new found determination in the beautiful green eyes as Hans looked at the man playing his lover. And a bit of something else. Stephen was sharp as a knife. 

“All right, sweetheart,” Hans slipped back into his role, just the same. “But don’t let him step all over you, okay?”

“Why do you let him speak like that?” Daniel almost hissed.

“Hans is my lover, and I don’t see what the problem is,” Stephen spoke. “You don’t like to hear him calling me sweetheart? Is this what you don’t like?”

Daniel was looking at his ex like he was seeing a lunatic.

“What happened to you?” he asked, eyeing Stephen and furtively, Hans, with growing unease.

“Maybe I got struck by lightning,” Stephen pursed his lips.

“Oh, sure. That would explain everything,” Daniel opened his arms in surrender. “Anyways, enough of this mise-en-scene. Did you want to make me feel bad for our so-called break up? Fine. You made your point. Now please, feel free to send this gorilla back to the zoo.”

“Daniel!” 

Stephen’s voice was suddenly so loud, that both the other men in the room stared at him in disbelief.

“I would appreciate,” Stephen spoke again, calmer this time, “if you did not insult my lover. As you said, we are through, and I see myself forced to tell you to get up, get dressed, and leave.”

“What?” Daniel seemed pretty much in shock.

Hans wanted so much to intervene, but he had to let Stephen lead this battle. The man was a sight to behold when he was a little angry. That was a face of the guy he had not seen before.

“Sorry, did I stutter?” Stephen said with a small fake smile. “Let me offer a quick translation. Get the fuck out!”

“Honey, that guy meant nothing to me,” Daniel’s voice became suddenly whiny. “I get why you might feel upset, but now I’m back. You know we’re good together. Do you really want to kick me to the curb? And for what? For this guy?” he pointed at Hans, refraining, this time, from adding any unflattering words.

All right. The asshole was becoming a bit annoying. Hans threw a quick look at Stephen, wanting to ask for allowance to intervene. But again, Stephen seemed to be on a roll.

“For this guy?” Stephen echoed his ex’s words and turned towards Hans.

He slowly placed one hand on Hans’s arm and squeezed the hard muscles beneath his fingers.

“Do you mean this hunk?” he added, looking straight into Hans’s eyes and biting his bottom lip in a suggestive gesture. “Do you mean this guy who goes exclusive with me and spends each night in my bed and no one else’s?”

“Yeah, right,” Daniel snorted, but it was becoming obvious that his resolve was shaking. “A guy like him? Going exclusive? With you?”

Stephen turned towards his ex again.

“Why is that so hard to believe?”

“Well, just … look at you,” Daniel spoke. “It’s not like you’re up to his level. And I’m sure this guy fucks around more than me.”

“No. He just fucks me more than you ever fucked me,” Stephen replied. “And what do you mean by telling me to just look at myself? Don’t you think I’m hot?”

Wow, if that was sarcasm, it needed a footnote and an explanation, Hans grinned. 

“For me, of course, you are, honey,” Daniel caught wind of what was happening right away. 

“Yes, of course,” Stephen said with a big smile. “Only that this opinion of yours falters whenever there is a new guy that catches your eye, right?”

“You know me,” Daniel shrugged. “But I always come back to you, don’t I?”

“Yeah,” Stephen sighed. “Unfortunately. Now, please, I had to leave an important meeting to deal with you. People at work think that I am currently putting out a fire.”

Hans snickered. Stephen threw him a stern look, but he seemed just as amused if he was to take after the twinkling in green eyes.

“You’re kicking me out? But this is my home, too!” Daniel protested.

“No, it is mine. I remember quite distinctly how you packed all your things and flew towards greener pastures. Now, leave.”

Daniel didn’t seem completely convinced, but he got up from the bed. He dropped his towel, earning at instant laugh on Hans’s part. With a huff, he began gathering his clothes and dressing up.

“You’ll regret this, Stephen. I promise you. You can come begging as much as you want. As soon as I’m out this door, you’ll never have me back.”

“Sounds sweet,” Stephen said dryly and went to the drawer by the bed.

He took out the picture.

“Maybe should I offer you this memento of our relationship? It’s the only thing I still have to remind me of you, by the way. I don’t need it anymore.”

Hans was quick. He took the frame from Stephen’s hands, expertly pulled out the photo and ripped it in half. With satisfaction, he offered Daniel the only part the guy had to take away with him.

“You really have some nerve,” Daniel huffed and went straight for the door.

Stephen called after him.

“The key,” he said, opening his hand.

Daniel rummaged through his pants and placed the key on Stephen’s hand, then stormed through the door.

“Don’t let the door put a foot in your ass,” Hans called after him. 

“That is not how that saying goes,” Stephen protested, but, as soon as the door closed behind Daniel, he started laughing.

Hans shook his head and began laughing, too.

“Now tell me, you little rascal,” he closed in the distance between him and Stephen. “Were you going to send me away and lose all the fun?”

Stephen rolled his eyes, but then his smile faded a little.

“I thought you should be spared all the drama. You were not at fault. So …”

“So you thought I should be sent to the kitchen,” Hans grinned.

“No, no, no,” Stephen protested. “All right,” he sighed. “It was the wrong choice of words. I was just taken by surprise. I wasn’t expecting him to come back. It was quite a shock, really. But, seriously, you showed Daniel your dick?”

“Yeah, why not?” Hans shrugged.

He inhaled sharply as Stephen grabbed him by the front of his pants.

“I do recall calling exclusivity on this particular dick,” Stephen joked. “It is not for others to see, okay?”

“Wow, sweetheart, you’re not all milk and honey,” Hans spoke slowly.

“Yeah, big surprise,” Stephen leaned in and bit Hans’s lips.

Hans didn’t miss the chance and grabbed Stephen’s ass through his pants.

“How about you lose the office clothes and present yourself naked to my exclusive dick.”

Stephen sighed.

“I need to go back to work. People already think I’m a bit insane.”

“By the way, how did you get away?”

“I told them my cat ran away.”

“But you don’t have a cat.”

“Yeah, I know. Everyone knows that. Hence bigger the surprise.”

Hans began laughing. He picked the half of the picture he wanted to keep and showed it to Stephen.

“You are so in for a good spanking, sweetheart. What were you thinking? Did you want him to have a picture of you looking so happy?”

Stephen smiled fondly. 

“I definitely need that spanking. But, Hans, if you want a picture of me, why don’t you just ask?”

“You know. It didn’t cross my mind, until now. I want a picture with you. I want one with me in it, too. And I hope you’ll look even happier than here.”

The megawatt smile he was rewarded with told him everything he needed to know.

“Wow, this really is the perfect relationship, after all,” Stephen let out a small sigh. “You even stood up for me. I would have had doubts from a real boyfriend, let alone a fake one.”

The words were spoken leisurely, but Hans could feel every one like the prick of a needle. One was not a big deal, but as they multiplied, the little pinch was turning quickly into a rash. 

“What are you going to do about Daniel?” he asked, preferring, for the time being, to change the subject.

“Well, now that I made myself clear, let’s just hope he’ll leave me alone,” Stephen said, a bit too brightly.

Damn, Hans thought. Stephen was still thinking about the douchebag, despite his brave words from earlier. But what did he care, anyway? He was just a placeholder. An experiment. Something he didn’t want to end. But maybe, just maybe, Stephen wasn’t thinking the same thing.

***

There was a small change between them. Something growing, a tiny bit quieter than comfortable silence, ever since Daniel had made an appearance, back in Stephen’s life. Hans felt frustrated. There was nothing to say, nothing to reproach, and Stephen was just as nice and pleasant as always. What could he say to the guy? Don’t think of your ex? Ever? It was stupid, to begin with.

But he was not just going to stay and watch Stephen growing apart from him. If there was something he could do, he was just going to do it.

Weeks later, Hans was walking down the street, bent on surprising Stephen at work, something they had both agreed that fitted with the perfect couple’s image. But the guy was already gone on his lunch break.

“Do you really think they’re back together?” he heard whispers by the water cooler.

He casually reached for a cup and filled it with water. The two women measured him with growing interest. He gave them a perfunctory smile and pretended to walk away slowly.

“Frankly, I don’t think Daniel is right for him. Stephen could do so much better. Actually, I heard from Jenny, who works with him, that he got himself a new guy. A really handsome one. But now ..., I just don’t know.”

Hans took one deep breath. All right, so the moment of truth was imminent. The experiment had proven more than spot on, but it was time to conclude it. What was this unpleasant taste in his mouth?

***

He crossed the street, decided to grab a bite at least. A quick look through the cafe’s large windows brought him to a halt. Stephen was clearly engaged in conversation with someone.

One step, two steps. Why wasn’t he surprised? Yes, an honest conversation was in order.

***

“So,” he said, looking at Stephen.

He pushed his plate away. Well, he was going to miss the guy’s home cooking, that was for sure.

“So?” Stephen looked back at him. “What do you mean? By the way, you’ve been awfully quiet throughout the whole meal.”

“And you’ve been fidgety like hell,” Hans replied.

Stephen giggled like a schoolboy caught doing something naughty. Hans grimaced. All right, if he was the one to take the bull by the horns, that should be it. He threw the napkin on the table with a frustrated sigh. Stephen threw him a quizzical look.

“Look, I’ll make this easier for you,” he spoke. “I know this is supposed to be nothing but play pretend. And I know why you are fidgety about.”

“You do?” Stephen’s eyes grew wide. “Oh, thank God, I had no idea how to bring it up, without sounding cheesy. And, it is true that we almost always think of the same things and ...”

Hans stood up abruptly, earning a surprised look from Stephen. He was fine with the guy wanting to go back to his boyfriend, but Stephen didn’t have to make a joke out of everything. Regardless of how untrue their relationship had been, that was really hurtful.

“You don’t have to bother,” he said thinly. “I know my way to the door. Have fun with mister douchebag. Let’s just hope he treats you right this time around.”

He began walking towards the door with purposeful steps.

“Wait, what?” Stephen almost shouted. “And what am I supposed to do with this now?”

Hans sighed. Was it really the moment for another joke? He turned to find Stephen up to his feet, too, and holding something in his right hand, stretched out.

“What on earth...?” he felt his jaw going slack. “Is that a ring?”

Stephen blushed, but he still held out his hand.

“Yes, it’s a ring,” he said, biting his lips and blushing even more.

Hans began walking back to the table.

“For me?” he asked, pointing both index fingers towards his own chest.

“Yes, for you,” Stephen said, his eyes a bit glassy.

“Wait, what about Daniel?”

“Daniel? What about him? He moved firms, thank God. But, of course, he had to ask for my help and seeing that I was going to see less of him, I agreed to aid him with the paperwork.”

Hans exhaled. Was he an impressive idiot or what? Now his eyes traveled back to the ring.

“Are you serious about this?” he pointed towards the little golden band held by slightly trembling fingers.

“I’ve never been more serious,” Stephen said solemnly. “Hans, will you marry me?”

Now his jaw wasn’t slack anymore. It was just on the floor somewhere.

“I ...do?” he said hesitantly.

Stephen laughed softly.

“I wasn’t expecting my question to be answered with a question.”

Hans shook his head.

“Wow,” he whispered. “I mean ... Is this just something perfect couples do?”

Stephen’s smile faltered, and his hand began to drop.

“Fuck,” Hans said softly and hurried to catch the falling hand.

He almost struggled Stephen’s fingers to tear the ring away from them. 

“No, it’s not something perfect couples do,” Stephen fell back in his chair. “I went too far, right?” he murmured and clutched his face in his hands. “I thought we stopped pretending somewhere along the way.”

Hans pulled his chair closer and tipped Stephen’s chin, forcing him to look up.

“We’re not pretending,” he said, sure of himself. “I just didn’t have it in me to bring it up, I guess. We’re lucky one of us is brave enough to own up to his feelings. But I’m not going to fall behind, sweetheart.”

“You mean it?” Stephen’s eyes lit up.

“Yeah,” Hans nodded. “Just look.”

With that, he showed Stephen the small golden band, his ring finger, and then he pushed the ring down.

Only to manage to get by the first knuckle.

“Oh, fuck,” Stephen complained instantly.

“Is this a new trend for engagement rings?” he flexed his ring finger a few times.

Stephen just buried his face in his hands.

“How could I miss your finger size so badly?” he whined.

Hans began laughing.

“Is this the most fucked up proposal in history or something?”

“Why? Because I missed your finger size by one inch or something?” Stephen pretended to sniffle.

“Hey, I’m not an ogre, you know? And I have feelings,” Hans joked. “But no, your lack of knowledge in this department is not the biggest blunder. I thought you were breaking up with me.”

“Why?” Stephen looked at him, clearly surprised.

“You seemed far away, no offense.”

“I was trying to figure out a way to propose. And, of course, talk to you about, well, this thing between us, being more than just play pretends. It appears that I did everything backward, but at least the cat is out of the bag now.”

“Your imaginary cat?” Hans joked.

Stephen swatted him playfully.

“I was nervous. I had no idea what you were going to say. And, of course, I should not have hurried to propose. That was kind of stupid. In my head, it just seemed perfect. I was confessing and asking you to marry me at the same time. Maybe I should stop watching all those romantic movies.”

“Hey, we’re watching them together, you don’t get to pull the plug on that,” Hans joked again. “Well, as the saying goes. All’s well that ends well.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Stephen pouted. “My perfect romantic scenario is in a shambles.”

“It means that I love you and that, yes, I will marry you. Just remind me not to let you buy a cock ring for me, though. That would make a really strange visit to the ER.”

Stephen feigned a hurt look.

“Hey, I know exactly the size of your cock! I just never really paid attention to your fingers! But that is something that I will definitely correct. Now give me that, so I can return it.”

Hans closed his hand, with a small laugh.

“Are you kidding me? This is the ring you proposed me with. I’ll never get rid of it.”

“Ah, so that means that I will be your laughing stock for years,” Stephen rolled his eyes.

“Of course, sweetheart. Couples who laugh together, stay together.”

“I’m not sure I would be laughing,” Stephen sighed dramatically. 

For a few seconds, they stared at each other.

“Wait, did you just say you love me?” Stephen spoke first.

“I sure did. Now, what on earth are you waiting for?”

“Okay. I love you, you big oaf.”

“Ugh, what was that for?”

“Did you really think I would get back with Daniel?”

“Who knows what goes into that pretty head of yours?” Hans grinned.

“Oh, so I’m pretty and stupid. Is this what you think?”

“Definitely. How else would you have ended up with me?”

Stephen laughed.

“And I know for a fact that you only like me because I’m a hunk and you cannot get enough of my cock,” Hans added.

“Sure thing,” Stephen giggled. “How about you give me some of that cock already? I feel like I’m going through withdrawal.”

“Bedroom. Now.”

They must have broken the land speed record, that was how fast they got there.