[Slimy Slime] Chapter 63: We won?!

“What do you mean he ran away?!” I practically screamed.

WHAT?! What on earth is going on here? I stared down the goblin that had shown up, suddenly feeling like I was in a dream. The goblin cringed, visibly shaking, wide eyed terror in his eyes. He had been let in by Krrrgg and he’d been even more scared then but to my surprise, it seemed like Krrrgg had recognized him.

“That’s Hirik.” She had said.

So I’d let him in. Honestly, even if this was the strongest goblin in the world… I still had the confidence to win even without my spiritual fists. That’s just the difference between stats and Generations. To my utter shock, once he’d seen me, he’d immediately fallen prone, bowing, slamming his head against the ground, trying to swear loyalty to me.

That would have been… annoying but only mildly surprising if not for the fact that Krrrgg of all people had seemed suspicious. Apparently, Hirik wasn’t just any goblin. No, no that became clear in a single moment, the exact second he began pleading for mercy. Because… Hirik…

He was speaking fluent common! The other goblins were one thing but this… and not only that, I could see it. Hirik was by far the smartest goblin I’d ever seen. Once we actually guaranteed him that we weren’t going to immediately kill him, Krrrgg had asked him to explain, in detail. At axe point. Axe blade? Axe curve? Whatever! She had her axe to his neck.

And then… well… this!

“Y-Yes.” Hirik spoke up again. “[Goblin Chief] Grack has fled, taking as many goblins as possible to the dark forest.”

Krrrgg visibly shuddered, nearly cutting poor Hirik.

My mind felt like it was going to be washed away. The Goblin Chief… Grack… the one that had sent an absolutely horrifying amount of people at me… had just run away? Was I hearing that right? Were my slimy non-ears betraying me? Perhaps I was still asleep.

But no. No, reality was still here, despite my best and futile efforts to pinch myself. My brain felt like it was melting out my ears, like the whole world had suddenly gone hi-definition all at once. Like colors had become so much sharper, my ears were ringing, and if I had a body I’d feel light headed.

“King Slime?” Sandra called out to me sounding worried.

“It’s… really over?” I asked Hirik and he nodded like a bobblehead.

Suddenly, it was like the weight of mountain had just disappeared off me and I just… became a puddle. As much as one as I could be. The relief was so… immense. I wasn’t stupid or blind or unintelligent. I have no idea how many goblins got sent our way but… it was an insane amount. If they had even rudimentary intelligence, we were doomed. If they had actual intelligence of just a zombie hoard, we would probably be doomed. Or if they were [Hob-Goblins] instead of goblins or if they had just come earlier or…. Or or or. We were alive because the [Goblin Chief] was stupid, no, a coward. We shouldn’t be. The disadvantage was beyond us.

We essentially set up a single wall and they all killed themselves on it. That was stupid. All they had to do was go around it, that was it. That was the level of close we’d gotten. Not all, no, almost any other creature with an army would be smarter than that. And I’d known that. I’d seen that. I’d been worried for the last two weeks that I’d wake up and the horde would have turned, spread out, surrounded us. That I’d wake up to all my people and friends dead.

We shouldn’t be alive.

And there were still more goblins, so many more. A war of attrition would have ended us, goblins breed so fast. I worried about another horde coming, or just throwing bodies for weeks, months, forever until we were overrun. It wasn’t even a wild strategy, with the [Goblin Chief]’s skill… it was completely possible. That was what we were facing. Krrrgg had been happy but… sickened and I understood why. A true goblin horde, with a [Goblin Chief], [Goblin Captain]’s, [Goblin Archer]’s, [Goblin Shaman]’s, [Goblin Sneaks]’s and more and more, with damn near infinite goblins… that was enough to sweep over multiple kingdom’s in practically an instant, let alone a single city.

Never before had I been so happy that the enemy I faced was both stupid and a coward. He hadn’t even gotten close enough to see the enemy. As Hirik continued to babble on, to talk about the chief, that only became more and more clear. Hirik had seen my final attack, the raising of the meat grinder, and had reported it. Grack, not having instantly won by the people of a straight line of tens of thousands of goblins, had cut and run.

“Thank god for stupid enemies…” I finally whispered out. The relief was so… strong. I had no idea how stressed I had been until it was finally over. I guess… I guess in many ways I expected us to lose. After seeing so many goblins, I was positive we would die somehow. It had wormed it’s way deep into my subconscious, that I’d lose all my people and friends, and now… now it was over.

“King Slime… are you okay?” Michael called out and it was the laughing of Tilia that finally broke me out of reprieve.

“Okay?!” I said, jumping up. “Michael, WE WON! I’m better than okay! Oh my god, I get to hold an award ceremony! I’m gonna make really fancy medals and everything! OH! This is going to be amazing! I’m gonna make them all fancy and wait! What color ribbons do I use?! Yellow would be too tacky but blue might be a little plain! Oh my gods, what color do I pick?! Of course the medals need to be silver, wait, no. Hmm, that’ll make it seemed like they’re second place medals! No no, maybe with a purple motif! But I should save for the really special-”

“King Slime.” Sandra interrupted.

“Hmm? Yes?” I asked, feeling a bit dazed from my train of thought being wrecked.

“What do we do with him?” Sandra said, pointed to Hirik who still had an axe at his neck.

Oh.

“Well, just have him go do whatever? I mean there’s enough housing in the goblin area if he wants to become a citizen. Or he can just leave I guess.”

Hirik seemed shocked at my words and I could visibly see Sandra trying to hold back a sigh and failing.

“King Slime… you’re attitude towards citizenship is… makes things difficult.”

“Huh?! But… it’s not like I’m a slaving warlord! People can come and go as they please, as long as they pay in mana.”

“He served the enemy, directly, King Slime.”

I waved that away, literally, thank you hands.

“All goblins did, more or less, so what?”

“He could betray us.” Krrrgg said suddenly, seeming fierce.

“Uhh… well, hmm.”

It wasn’t like I had police or a homeland internal defense or anything. I really had no protection against terrorists. Oh shit, it’s a miracle none of the goblins had killed each other yet. What on earth am I supposed to do if that happens?!

Suddenly, a new weight settled down on me. A new stress as my mind reached forward.

Rules, no, Laws. I was going to need laws, people to enforce those laws, an economy that wasn’t just mana so people could buy good and services, representatives of the people, a properly organized military hierarchy, people to make new laws without me, taxes probably, figure out land ownership, and so much more.

My mind blanked, realizing that… being a King may not be as fun as I thought it was going to be.

“Uhhh… well, I’ll just leave him in your care Krrrgg.” I said, which did cause an evil smile to pop onto her face.

“Wait!” Hirik said, staring at me and particularly my hands. “I… I wish to serve you. To be of use.”

“Uh, yeah. Krrrgg will help you with that. If she says your good, you’re good. So until then, welcome to Slimetopia! Oh but, you can leave any time you’d like. Now if you’ll excuse me… I have a ceremony to plan… and a lot of thoughts…”

Come on Slimy Slime! Let’s just focus on the ceremony first! We can deal with all the nitty gritty of building a kingdom later…

*****

“To Orvik, I grant you this Medal of Honor for your unwavering dedication to the kingdom.”

“To Vook, I grant you this Medal of Honor for your exemplary performance.”

“To Kkkkik, I grant you…”

It was a beautiful ceremony. Beautiful in the traditional sense. There had been more than enough mana to create a building but I didn’t. Instead, I simply made a raised stage in the training yard. It hadn’t even occurred to me at first but every single goblin was a soldier in a way. They all followed Krrrgg by racial instinct and that meant that at a certain period of the day, they all trained. They all followed her. It felt… right to hold it here. Even if their participation this time had been light, mostly throwing things down the wall, it had all been felt. The Goblite had worked the hardest, rapidly spearing as many as they could. Honestly, it hadn’t done much. I wasn’t blind, I was 99% of the offense and defense here before the end.

But it wouldn’t stay that way. And I would remember those who helped me. Who served this kingdom, who protected others, who risked their lives to keep the rest of the people safe.

The Goblite were standing on stage, and before I’d done any speeches, I couldn’t resist handing out the medals. And they were medals. Ribbons of purple with a keen shine of blue, red, and yellow slimes on the front. And on the back? The face of a fierce goblin, smiling in victory. Their faces, specifically. I was no artist but the dungeon allowed me to create anything with a thought provided I had the power and I wanted what they had to be unique. I had even put their names on the other side and designed the medals in a way that both sides were equal. There was no clear front and back of the metal.

All the goblins were in attendance, standing out across the training field, watching their members get honored. This… this is what I lived for. I wanted to be on top, to be a King, but giving back like this made everything feel worthwhile. Like I wasn’t a stupid man with a stupid dream, in over his head in a fantasy world. But like I was a stupid slime, with a stupid dream, raising others with me in stupidity together. It struck me, as I was giving the seventh medal to Greiik, that I was actually doing this whole kingdom thing. Actually helping raise people up. More goblins would come soon, be recruited, or just naturally wander over. The city would grow, into a proper city. The idea felt insane to me. I hadn’t been ready for the mantle and now that the ‘war’ was officially over, I felt even less ready.

“To Krrrgg, for leading your soldiers into battle, I present you with the Medal of Leadership. May you strive to always lead the best you can.”

This medal was different, bigger, shinier. But that was the only nominal difference. Krrrgg practically radiated pride as she stood, fist against her chest, wide raw smile on her face. I bobbed my slime at her and moved to the next person, the last in line, someone that had looked incredibly nervous from the moment she got up here.

“To Sandra, for without you we all would have perished, I present you the Medal of the Savior. May you continue to protect our lives.”

Sandra gulped. I liked to be my fun whimsical self, to play around, but there was always a time for sincerity and seriousness. To truly show your gratitude. This was one of those times. The medal Sandra got was sky blue, with three purple slimes, practically radiating in the light. I had absolutely no idea what metal it was made out of but the dungeon made thoughts reality.

Finally, I flew up to the small podium, looking down at everyone. The goblins who I knew and didn’t know, from the elderly with loopy smiles to the ones practically radiating desire to be up there. To the pregnant goblins to the children only recently born. To Michael standing there beaming at his wide with Tilia happily giggling in his arms, to even Hirik, standing there looking awkward and unsure.

“Everyone.” I said, my voice booming outward, catching everyone by surprise. I didn’t have lungs, talking required moving air through my lungs and I had practiced for about half a day yesterday to get this right.

“Today we mark the day of victory. You all joined me out of coercion and force, bowing before your nature. But I don’t regret sending Krrrgg to recruit you, not after I have seen what [Goblin Chief] Grack would do to you all. It is only through your efforts that we have the walls that protected us, the watchtowers around us, and the weapons in everyones hands. You did that and the ones behind me used it to the best of their ability. Without you, there would be no kingdom, no city, no houses or food or water. No showers or toilets.”

I saw more than a few grimace at that last line. Most with mixed expressions. Goblins took to showers and toilets… not particularly well. Dang it, cleanliness is important!

“I thank you all. I also thank the ones behind me. It was only because of them we survived. They will not just be getting a medal but in the coming days, they may request any item for creation and receive it if it is possible. I will personally custom create it for them out of our dungeon mana. And lastly…”

I knew goblins. I had a good handle on them. Most of the goblins before me didn’t really understand most of my words, they were going off the feeling more than anything. They were, well, too unevolved, literally. That would change and I’d really have to beef up my speech giving skills. But for now… I knew exactly what goblins liked.

With a flex of an absolute shit ton of our mana, an absolute horde of food appeared. It didn’t take much for goblins to just summon their own food from the items in their home, but it was limited by their mana. I was still shocked none had skimped on the mana delivery or anything but I guess that just showed how much they bowed before Krrrgg.

“A feast for us all!”

Those words were like a gunshot and in a moment, all the goblins rushed forward, even the Goblite behind me, into the massive pile of food. I hadn’t even bothered making a table or plates or silverware, that would have been silly. They were goblins, they weren’t going to eat like that. At least a dozen of them merely dived into the food like it was a pool. I’d made sure it was mainly slabs of meat. I’d consider making drinks but yeah…. Yeah that would be a nightmare to clean up. At least the food, by the end of things, would 100% be gone.

Sandra and Michael stared at the goblins, gobsmacked, watching them descend like a horde of locusts on the absolute mountain of food.

“Wow.” Michael eventually said.

“Unreal.” Sandra said.

“Bbb.” Tilia let out a little baby sound.

“Alright, that should handle that. I’m going to set us up a small table with some food and wine… away from that.”

I smiled as I saw Krrrgg practically diving around and through it like a shark. I felt a warm feeling in my chest and a new weight begin to take hold.

Today was a day of celebration but tomorrow? The next day? The next week, the next month, the next half year?

Those were the days when it was time to take a step back. I had the stats and a decent idea on how to evolve. Now it was really time to focus on my Kingdom. To become more than just a King in name.

Because challenges were coming and eventually, I was going to leave, to travel. And I wouldn’t be the same slime when I did.

I would make sure my Kingdom, that I, would be ready.