Tucker Chapter, PT. 6

“I don’t think we should be…” Her voice died as he speared her core, tearing through her hymen.

Jesse went rigid and then his head came up. He stared down at her, eyes wide with astonishment. Every ounce of anger drained away to be replaced with anguish. He cupped her wet cheek with a shaking hand.

“You’re a virgin?” he whispered.

She nodded jerkily.

He rested his forehead against hers. “God, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, baby.”

He chanted his apology while she was rigid as a board beneath him. She was dimly aware of the sound of kids playing basketball in the street. His blinds were up. There was a bush obscuring part of his window, but if anyone looked in, they’d see…

“Look at me.”

Her skittering thoughts halted. She met his gaze as he stroked back her hair. He looked like her brother again. Calm, gentle, affectionate. But he was inside of her, and he hadn’t pulled out yet. She could feel his dick pulsing inside of her like a piece of heated steel. Now that the pain was receding, it felt… nice. Better than anything she’d used on herself.

“You never…” he began unsteadily and then hissed and closed his eyes as his dick twitched inside of her.

“That was the first time he ever touched me.”

His eyes shot open and bored into hers. “And that’s the last time. No one’s ever going to touch you but me.” His gaze moved over her face and landed on her lips. “You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for this moment.” His hips moved and when she didn’t flinch, his breath hitched in excitement. “I’m sorry. I need this.”

She didn’t make a sound as he began to move. She knew he was larger than other boys his age and had witnessed his strength, but she had never experienced both until now. He was going too deep, too fast. She told him to stop. He didn’t, so she began to fight back. Her hands moved under his tee and gouged his back, but he was deaf to anything but the urges of his body and relentlessly sought relief. When he finally climaxed and slumped on top of her, she was covered in cold sweat.

He eased to the side so she could take a full breath. Pinned partly beneath him, she stared at the ceiling, battered, confused, and numb. This wasn’t supposed to happen. It couldn’t happen. But it had. Now, what?

Jesse lay on his side facing her. She tensed as he splayed his hand on her quivering abdomen.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured.

She wasn’t sure whether he was sorry for what he’d just done, his roughness, or believing she hadn’t been a virgin. It didn’t matter. Nothing did anymore.

He gripped her face and forced it toward him. Sated, heavy lidded eyes searched her blank, tear streaked face.

“I’ll make this up to you,” he said as his thumb passed over her bottom lip.

The only way he could make this up to her was if they pretended that none of this had happened. As if he’d heard her thought, he winced and closed his eyes.

“I’ll never forgive myself.” He stroked her cheek. “I promised myself I’d never hurt you, that I’d always protect you. I failed on both counts today, and I can’t take it back. Can you forgive me?”

She nodded without thinking it through. Accepting his apology was a reflex, something that had been drilled into her. Nothing was so egregious that it couldn’t be forgiven, even this… She gulped back tears as her body began to shake.

Jesse drew her against him. Even though he was the cause of her pain, she wrapped one arm around him and sobbed against his throat as everything that had happened over the past hour overwhelmed her. He stroked her hair and apologized over and over.

“I swear, Violet,” he breathed fervently. “I’ll never—”

She turned her head and latched onto his mouth. She wasn’t sure whether she did it because she didn’t want him to make rash promises, or because she wanted a different type of comfort. Either way, it did the job. The talking stopped, and the physical reassurance she desperately needed after he’d used her body came in the form of a gentle, almost reverent kiss.

 She had kissed a few boys, but most of her experience came from Tucker. He was experienced, but there was something about the way Jesse kissed her, as if she was made of fragile glass that mended the trauma of her first time. That hadn’t been him. That was his dark alter ego that paid her midnight visits. This was Jesse, the one who clasped her face as he kissed her, as if she was the most precious thing in the world.

Kissing other boys caused her tummy to flutter, but with Jesse, she felt like her world was spinning. He kissed her with an absorption that blocked out everything else. He didn’t stop, even to let her catch her breath. His lips were slightly rough from always being outside.

When his fingers slid between her legs, she stiffened and tried to push his hand away.

“Let me do this for you,” he breathed against her lips. “Let me show you what should have been.”

She was prepared for more pain when his fingers slid inside her. To her surprise, there was a pleasant, familiar throb of desire.

“Does that feel good?”

She bit her lip.

“Violet.”

Her eyes opened and collided with his.

“Tell me how it feels.”

He wasn’t angry, but his intensity was back. She flushed under his dissecting gaze as her awareness flared out, reminding her where they were and that soon Mom and Dad would be…

Jesse’s thumb rubbed her clitoris. She let out a stifled shriek and arched off the bed.

Jesse kissed her cheek. “That’s what I need to know, Violet. I want to make you fly.”

He asked her for guidance on how he was making her feel, but words were beyond her. Her moans, gasps, and shudders led him instead. When she finally came, she bit her own forearm to stifle her scream.

“Good girl.”

She heard Jesse’s satisfied tone from a long way off. She felt his hand smoothing what was dripping out of her onto her belly. Her eyes fluttered shut against her will.

“Jesse,” she slurred.

He kissed her temple. “Everything’s fine. Go to sleep.”

“But, I…”

He covered her mouth with his. Their tongues dueled before her mouth went slack. He broke the kiss, chuckling, and kissed her forehead. “Sleep, baby.”

**This is a raw draft of the prequel for Corrupt Idol. Please do not share or distribute.

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