C14. PT. 2

Are you up?

If they didn’t answer, there was no sense in getting up. She wasn’t sure whether she was pleased or disappointed to see the bubbles appear as one of them began to write a response. Did she wake them or…?

Johan: Everything okay?

Jasmine: Thinking about going to the gym.

Johan: The gym in the building?

Jasmine: Yes. The one Roth goes to. Do you know where it is? I’ve never been.

Johan: Yes, we come every day. We’re here with him now.

Jasmine: Ok! Don’t tell him I’m coming. I’ll message you when I’m ready.

She dropped her phone and stared blearily at the ceiling. There was no need for light with the glow from the city illuminating the room. She stretched before she forced herself to get up. She usually woke long after he left, but made sure she was available in the evenings when he came home. She started greeting him at the elevator by throwing herself into his arms. The first time she did it, he seemed a little dumbfounded by the enthusiastic welcome. But, it didn’t take him long to recover. Seconds later, she was over his shoulder as he double timed it to their bedroom. He expressed his approval for this new ritual by torturing her with his mouth until she screamed.

Along with scheduling dinner, which satisfied his need for structure and routine, she requested an array of sweets for Roth to sample. He was wiling to try anything, but so far, had only shown a preference for pumpkin pie and a Japanese dessert called mochi.

Once in the shower, she turned her face up to the spray, willing the water to bring her into this dimension. She was so freaking tired, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that Roth needed her. It couldn’t be a coincidence that he was sleeping less than he normally did after confessing his sexual history to her. He’d always been an insomniac, but the way he was waking up—that violent jerk that rocked the whole bed—was that of someone in combat mode. She just wasn’t sure whether he was fighting dreams or memories.

She tried to address his past several times. She wasn’t surprised when he refused to elaborate or discuss it further. It was clear that he regretted sharing it with her, and insisted that the professor hadn’t scarred him or had any lasting effect on him. She wasn’t so sure.

After getting dressed in a gray tracksuit with dusty rose sneakers and a hat to cover her makeup-free face and dark circles under her eyes, she shuffled across the penthouse to make coffee. By the time she was halfway through her cup, she was more alert, though her eyes streamed from constant yawning. She texted her guards as she drained the last of it.

Mo showed up to escort her. She stepped into the elevator and nodded to the operator, whose eyes flicked over her as she passed. She greeted Mo with a wan smile. The neckline of his shirt was dark with sweat.

“Did you tell him?” she asked.

“No. Said I had to make a call. Johan’s with him.”

“You all wake up in the middle of the night to work out?”

“We’re used to his schedule.”

“I thought you were on my schedule.”

“We are, aside from his morning workouts. We’re in the building, so it’s easier for us to accompany him instead of calling someone from his team.”

She grunted.

“What are you doing up?”

“Couldn’t sleep. I figured I might as well see where he goes twice a day.”

That was partially true. She was curious about the building’s amenities that she had yet to use. But the bigger reason was, she ordered workout clothes and shoes so she would be ready when Roth asked her to accompany him to the gym. But he hadn’t issued another invitation, even though he went most evenings. So, she was taking matters into her own hands and joining him whether he wanted her there or not.

They exited the elevator into a long hallway. She read the signs and veered in the opposite direction from the gym. Mo didn’t demur, but followed in her wake as she investigated the indoor pool.

“This is my kind of workout.”

Despite her low tone, her voice carried in the empty room and echoed back to them. The seventy-five-foot-long pool with underwater lights showed crystal clear water that begged her to dive in. The ceilings were two stories high, with windows that allowed for lots of natural light and unbelievable views from the lounge chairs.

On their way out, she peeked into the spa. Mo waited while she took a quick tour of the locker rooms, hot tubs, and massage rooms. Nothing was locked.

As she rejoined Mo, and they made their way along the quiet, empty halls, she said, “I know why he’s up at this hour. Not dealing with people makes it easier to think and do what you need to without interruptions.”

Mo grunted. “You’d be surprised who’s up at this hour and who he bumps into at the gym.”

She rolled her eyes. “Of course, he manages to turn a workout session into a business meeting.”

Mo chuckled. “He turns everything to his advantage. He’s the consummate businessman.”

That he was. Even their marriage was a business deal with guidelines, parameters, a deadline, and payout. She saw the wisdom in it. It was better to have defined limits. It made her appreciate their time together more. Having him open up about his past made her drop the hand she had up between them and helped release the last of her misgivings. She started to treat him like a real husband—the way she had at the beginning of their marriage before disillusionment settled in. It was terrifying and liberating to let go. This time, she knew she’d be hurt, but she accepted it.

They were both battle-scarred and wary. They’d been abandoned, ignored, and dismissed, but they were willing to take a chance on each other again. She could feel him staring at her while they ate, when she walked into his home office and sat in one of the chairs to read while he worked, even when she drifted off to sleep at night. He didn’t ask for an explanation for her changed demeanor. He studied her instead. He didn’t push her away, and he didn’t just accept what she gave him. He demanded more. If she gave him a peck, he wanted to make out. If she leaned into him, she found herself on his lap. If she wanted to undress him, he made sure he did the same with her… and then some. There were still moments when he mentally withdrew, when he set her aside and disappeared for a while. She didn’t get offended because she knew he needed the time alone to assimilate or because he was on sensory overload.

**This is a raw draft of Bitter Confessions. Please do not share or distribute.

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