#957 The Saintess of Old

“Don’t worry! I’m a saintess! The fact that I came back to life is because of the blessings of the sacred gods! I’m not an evil undead! Therefore, I’m innocent! Case closed!”

Looks Like this saintess avoided a complete mental breakdown with her own convoluted logic.

Seriously, what’s up with her?

And what even is a saintess, anyway?

“You’ve asked a good question! Allow me, Saintess Maradona, who has returned after 300 years, to enlighten you on what it means to be a saintess!!!”

So, we’re just gonna gloss over the fact that she resurrected?

Well, resurrection is kind of a big deal for saints. It’s like you’re not a full-fledged saint until you’ve died and come back at least once…

“A saintess is the most sacred being on earth, recognized by the Order as the most sacred of all women!”

“Uh-huh.”

Wow.

But she sure is throwing the word “sacred” around a lot.

“Every few years, the Order gathers thousands of sisters to compete for their sacredness! They fight and fight and fight… and the last sister standing is crowned as the saintess and celebrated by all!!”

“I see.”

Sounds like a pretty intense selection process.

“Of course, being chosen as a holy maiden isn’t the end! Once chosen, a holy maiden must dedicate herself entirely to bringing holy blessings to this world! That’s why I’ve had to keep fighting!!!”

“Uh-huh.”

And here I am, nodding like an architect agreeing to blueprints.

So, is that why she came to hunt down a Lifeless King?

Well, a Lifeless King is a terrifying monster, one of the World’s Two Greatest Calamities.

If you can defeat it, you’d definitely want to…

But is her “sacred” power really on par with the strongest undead?

Looking at the current results, I’d say probably not.

“The Order does not acknowledge the existence of undead, which defy the natural order of life and death! Therefore, as a saintess, I have sworn to eradicate all undead from this world!”

“Whoa, talk about intense.”

“The dead deserve peaceful rest! That is the teaching of the gods.”

So, you’re aiming to take down the Lifeless King, the top of the undead hierarchy?

That’s a high bar. Maybe start with something more manageable, like zombies?

“Don’t worry! I’ve got a semi-first-class undead extermination license!”

Who issued that license?

And semi-first-class? If you’re going to take down the Lifeless King, you’d need a full first-class license.

Judging by how things turned out, young lady, you didn’t quite make it, did you?

“Hohoho… it’s not easy being the target.”

Even Sensei is chuckling wryly.

“I was touring dungeons across the country where Lifeless Kings reside to wipe them out! But then I died…! I fell halfway through my mission. How shameful…!”

That’s a pretty terrifying plan.

Confusing recklessness with courage, it seems.

I get why she had to retire, but I’m curious about how far she got.

Since she calls herself a saintess, maybe she really did have some fierce battles with common Lifeless Kings…

But Sensei...

He’s on a whole other level beyond your average Lifeless King.

How many Lifeless Kings did she face before running into him?

“His was the very first dungeon. …To think I’d stumble on the first step!”

So, she was completely unprepared.

I mean, you took on the final boss in the first stage. That’s what going to Sensei’s dungeon means.

But now, it’s hard to tell if she really has the strength to challenge a Lifeless King.

“Shall we test her out then?” says Sensei.

What now?

Sensei... takes something out of his pocket.

A...sphere in his hand…?

He throws the palm-sized ball and…

“Earl! I choose you!!!”

With a shout, the sphere splits open in mid-air, lightning striking the ground!

From the dazzling light emerges… another Lifeless King?!

“The Earl Lifeless King has arrived! …What the heck?!”

Even he can’t help but exclaim in Kansai dialect.

I mean, seriously, what the heck?

Why is the strongest undead coming out of a sphere?

Sensei, explain, plz.

“He’s the Earl. He’s a Lifeless King I once subdued.’

Yes, I remember.

You used him in the S-rank adventurer test recently.

“He’s a fairly average Lifeless King, which makes him quite handy. I realized how useful he was and started carrying him around in a small sealing sphere.”

A Lifeless King used as per somebody’s convenience…!

Is that really a good thing?

“All right, Miss Saintess, if you’re really as powerful as they say, you should have no problem taking down the Earl. After all, his strength is just average for a Lifeless King.”

“Don’t call me average!”

The Earl is visibly annoyed.

But then...

“Something wrong?”

“N-Nothing at all! I’ll do my best!!!”

When Sensei glared at him, the Earl couldn’t argue back.

Despite being used like this, he had a wicked past, so it was hard to feel sorry for him.

If he keeps burning through his karma under Sensei’s watch, maybe he’ll be freed someday. Hang in there, Earl.

“Hoho, a Lifeless King commanding another Lifeless King? This should be fun...!”

The Saintess wears a confident smirk.

Honestly, her overly confident face just makes me nervous.

“So this is a warm-up act? Testing my skills on a weak Lifeless King before the big boss? Fine by me, bring it on!”

“You’ve got guts, girl!”

The Earl, fired up by her taunt, prepares for battle.

How would it turn out, you ask? Well...

***

It was one-sided.

In less than three seconds, the Saintess was beaten to a pulp and rolled away like a ragdoll.

“Whaaaaat?!”

She was sent flying, spinning sixteen times in the air before crashing into the ground, kicking up dust.

“Victory!”

The Earl emerges unscathed, a perfect win.

If this were a fighting game, the announcer would be shouting, “Perfect!”

Sensei, however, is giving him a dangerous look, thinking he might have overdone it.

“Earl...”

“No, it’s not what you think! I wasn’t being ungracious! I was summoned here after being unsealed, so I thought I’d be facing a strong opponent! But she was surprisingly weak, and I just got carried away! I was as shocked as anyone...!”

The Earl is making excuses at lightning speed.

Excuses, excuses.

“In simpler terms... she was weak!”

He finally blurted out.

“Weaker than I could have imagined! What kind of a battle was that?! There were stronger adventurers in the group that challenged me last time! If she’s that weak, even dungeon monsters would’ve sufficed!”

“Really?”

“Really!”

The Earl, worried about being permanently sealed again, desperately defends himself.

Meanwhile, the so-called Saintess, lying on the ground...

“...Hmph. Not bad,” she says, standing up.

Despite being beaten so badly, she has some serious grit.

But wait... is she on fire?

Is that from the Earl’s attack? No, he didn’t use fire attacks...

“That looks like the Flame of Regeneration,” analyzes Sensei. “It’s likely from Lord Saint’s gift. Perhaps tied to her cremation, granting her the Phoenix trait, rising from ashes no matter how many times she’s burnt. The regenerative power is embedded in all natural elements, but fire holds the greatest revival strength.”

“The more destructive the flame, the stronger the rebirth,” the Earl adds to the explanation.

“Thank you, divine gods! With this new power, I shall purify this land and make it worthy of your blessings!”

The Saintess is the only one still full of energy.