#687 The Earth’s Radiant Motherhood

The pyramid has become an impregnable fortress.

The World Heritage Site where the earth spirits have holed up, laden with traps and interior dungeons, is difficult to attack but easy to defend.

At its top, the earth spirits declare what sounds like a victory.

“An impwegnable fortwess!”

“Mawimos!”

“Toyako!”

“Mawimokkowi!!!”

I have no idea what they’re saying, but they’re definitely riled up.

They must be really drunk on that pyramid power.

“We can’t let this situation drag on... We have to do something...!”

I don’t really care about the pyramid, but I can’t ignore the earth spirits’ erratic behavior.

We want our cute spirits back to their lovable selves!

However, due to the pyramid’s impregnability and the full-swing resistance of the earth spirits, the siege is going at a snail’s pace.

“What should we do...?!”

“From time immemorial, there has always been a foolproof method for besieging castles, or so I hear...”

What is it, Anubis?

If you have a good idea, spit it out!

“But a castle siege...? Saying it out loud sounds a little strange...!” 

This chaos of barricading oneself in the massive pyramid, dividing groups into attackers and defenders, is indeed a castle siege.

I read in a novel somewhere that it takes ten times the enemy’s forces to lay siege to a castle or something.

“However, that’s why strategies effective for taking down castles have been studied, and know-how has been accumulated. If we unravel that knowledge, we’ll naturally understand what we need now.”

Oh!

Tell us, Anubis! What do we need for a castle siege?!

“Starvation tactics!”

“...”

“People can’t live without eating. If we surround the castle and cut off the food supply, they’ll get hungry, and their morale will drop. They’re sure to surrender! This is the most standard method of siege warfare!”

“Rejected.”

“Why?!”

It’s obvious, you buffoon!

Our opponents are the tiny and cute earth spirits! It would be cruel to make such kids go hungry and cry!

We can’t do such brutal, inhumane, and cold-blooded things to them!

Not even Sensei, the Lifeless King, agrees to that!

“To begin with, spirits operate on mana, which is supplied infinitely from the earth, so they won’t run out. Especially with the problem of pyramid power amplifying it.”

It was fundamentally an impossible strategy.

By the way, Sensei, when did you get here?

No, we don’t want to spend that much time on this incident in the first place. 

A starvation tactic is, by definition, a war of attrition, and it would be too sad not to interact with the earth spirits for so long.

We’ve already been waiting all winter!

“Do you have any good ideas, Sensei?”

“Hmm, let’s see...”

Here, we should consult with our wisest character on the farm—Sensei.

“When in trouble, it’s best to ask the specialist or the person in charge of that field, I believe.”

“I’m the expert when it comes to pyramids, though.”

Hush, Anubis, we’re not talking about you; sit down.

“In this case, we should summon the little ones’ specialist.”

Saying this, Sensei waves his staff.

What appeared next were the underworld god Hades and his wife, the earth goddess Demetersephone.

“Oh, it has been a while.”

Considering we’ve been summoning gods from other worlds lately, the summoning of a local god feels somewhat refreshing.

Nice to see you again. Would you like some tea, Your Radiance and Your Mightiness?

“...”

First, Hades is silently looking around.

Anubis squirms as if to escape his gaze.

“Anubiiiis? What art thou doing in such a place?” 

“Ahaha, what a coincidence. To think we would meet here of all places...!”

“Is it not obvious we should meet? This is the world we rule,” says Hades as he grabs Anubis by his snout.

Isn’t this precisely what I just did?!

“What intention hast thou in trampling upon others’ territory? Depending on thy answer, I might just decide to invade thy world, hmm? Should we clarify once and for all who the true origin of the Sphinx is, eh?” 

“Ow, ow, ow!!! My sincerest apologies! I didn’t mean to invade your territory; it just felt like visiting a friend’s house!”

So, even among gods, there are disputes when someone invades another’s territory without permission, huh?

“Moreover, thou hast built such a grand structure on the Saint’s farm. This place is untouchable even in our world. But thanks to you... oh dear me, the mana of the ley lines is greatly disturbed. It is all because of that equilateral pyramid! If thou art to build, build a Parthenon instead!” 

“I apologize as well.”

Sensei, who started all this by summoning the foreign gods, apologizes.

“But at this point, we have no choice but to ask for the help of Hades, who manages the mana of this world’s land...! After all, those children materialized because of Your Mightiness’ will; please, we ask for your mercy...!” 

Oh, right!

The fact that the normally intangible earth spirits took on such adorable forms was because Hades bestowed his grace on this land!

So, asking Hades for help here is like contacting customer service.

Please, Your Mightiness! Can you solve this nicely and easily?!

“Good grief; thou only pass the buck when thou art in trouble. Know that there is a reasonable price to pay for the blessings of the gods!”

Of course, Your Mightiness! If those adorable earth spirits return, I’ll cook up an even grander feast as a token of gratitude!!!

“Then, mine own dear wife; I rely on thee.”

“On it, love.”

Stepping forward when called is Hades’ wife, Demetersephone.

Even Hades himself passed the work to someone else.

“The management of the earth’s mana is ultimately the domain of mine own wife. That is why I pay the utmost respect to her!”

Well, even if you show off like that to us...

On the other hand, the entrusted Demetersephone, Hades’ wife and the queen of the underworld, begins to call out loudly from outside the pyramid.

“It is about time to come back, little ones; it is dinnertime!”

“OKAAAY!!!”

And then, in no time, spirits emerge from the pyramid.

As if they weren’t barricading themselves until a second ago, the way they flock around the Mother Earth Goddess is just like one big happy family!

“We had so much fun pwaying!”

“What’s for dinner today?”

“We wove you, Mama!”

Is this the motherhood of the Mother Earth Goddess?!

Before the overwhelming motherhood of mythic proportions, the earth spirits forget all about the distortion of pyramid power!

“Thou played a lot today, hm? Didst thou have fun?”

“Pwetend-revowution was sooo fun! “In internal stwife, it’s revowution until there’s a spwit in factions!”

The earth spirits safely returned to their senses, and all was well.

“Amazing... is this the power of the Mother Earth Goddess...?”

“Mine own wife is incredible. She has inherited the power of the Mother Goddess of All, Gaia, and it is thanks to her that thou mortals can live.”

And yet, with deep affection and a broad mind.

Is this what a goddess’ motherliness is like?

“Alright, Anubis, could you adjust the pyramid, please?”

“Yessir...!”

To ensure this kind of accident doesn’t happen again.

* * *

Thus, the earth spirits had a harmonious family dinner with Hades and Demetersephone, eating hamburgers.

Incidentally, when we showed Hades the beastly Zeus statue—a hopeless blossom born during the Snow Festival—he guffawed and took it home as a souvenir.

I’m so relieved we managed to get rid of a nuisance in passing...!

With all this, the earth spirits started their activities albeit early, and finally, spring is coming...!!!

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marimo - fuzzy algae balls, typically found in hokkaido cause of the climate there (they almost look like felted wool)

toyako-a city in hokkaido

marimokkori- pormanteau of marimo + mokkori (bulge/slang for erection). its one of hokkaido's mascot that is a personified marimo with a visible bulge in its crotch lol