#644 Dried Persimmon Chitchat

The story of making dried persimmons spread like wildfire, and other tree spirits came flocking in.

“This is unfair! You’re only drying the persimmonssssss!”

“I want you to dry my kind too! I’ll show you how delicious we can be!!!”

“We become concentrated sweetness after you evaporate our water content!!”

The tree spirits possessing various fruits surrounded me.

They’re always so overcome with greed whenever it’s about making them taste the best.

I shouldn’t be giving special treatment, either.

So let’s do it.

Let’s dry all the fruits and concentrate their sweetness to the limit!

We’re having a dried fruit festival!!!

Now, which fruit should I dry first?!

Want me to turn you into a dried fruit too?!

“Lord Saint! Please start with me!”

If it isn’t the staple of fruits, apple!

This is an ambitious undertaking to dry out apples that are already delicious when eaten normally!

Apples that are firm and dense are difficult to dry out as is, so I slice and dry them out to make them into chip-like snacks.

And voila! 

We have created dried apples!

They are thinly sliced into chips, so you can eat them like a snack!

You can taste the unique sweetness of apples more intensely!

They would be great with tea. 

Apple tea also exists, so there’s no doubt they’d make a good match! You could even throw dried apple chips directly into your tea if you wanted to!

“Lord Saint! I want to go next!”

Oh, the banana tree spirit!

I peel the banana to remove excess moisture, slice it up, and dry it out! 

The result is a perfect chip shape that’s also ideal for snacking!

These banana chips are also great to enjoy with a drink. 

They apparently go well with whiskey!

“The lingering sweetness...I could eat these all day!”

“Let’s keep going, Lord Saint! We still have plenty of energy left to spare!”

Dry fruits tend to have a crunchy texture due to the absence of moisture, but that’s not always the case. 

And the very representative of this is...you! Dried mango!

No matter how much you dry it, it never loses all of its moisture. That’s what gives it its chewy texture and makes it such an appealing dried fruit!

“YOU CAN’T FORGET ABOUT US, LORD SAINT!!!”

Who are you guys?!

Lemon, orange, hassaku orange, tangerine, and yuzu?!

Five citrus fruits?!

“We citrus fruits are often mistaken for another of our kind, but that’s why we come together as dried fruits! Please enjoy our deliciousness!”

Now, we’ve got dried citrus fruits with their peels intact, giving them a tangy flavor!

And what’s next on our list of dried fruits? 

Grapes!

In other words, raisins!

I think it’s safe to say that raisins are the most familiar dried fruit for everyone, right?

I’d love to sprinkle them on top of some dough and bake it up! 

That’s how you get raisin bread!

“It’s hard to stop eating this once you start...!”

After all, you can dry any fruit.

You can enjoy a new taste in their dried form.

That’s what dried fruits are.

You can eat them as they are or mix them in yogurt. It’s also great to mix them into bread or cake dough and bake them.

If you’ve grown tired of eating fruits normally, give dried fruits a try!

“Hahaha...! Did you think the festival ends here?”

“What?! Who’s there?!”

“Don’t forget about my existence. When it comes to drying, I am the original and the pioneer...!”

What?!

With that confident tone... could it be you’re the king of fruits, durian?!

Are you trying to make durian into a dried fruit?!

“The punchline in fruit-related jokes isn’t always me, Lord Saint.”

Oh, the durian tree spirit is right here.

If so, this boss-like voice belongs to...!

“Well then, let me reveal my true identity! It’s me!”

And their identity is...!

The incarnation of mushrooms, Matan-GO!

“When it comes to dried edibles, it has to be dried shiitake! The ultimate dried fruit! Let me treat you to dried shiitake mushrooms!”

“You’re not even a fruit.”

And on top of that, you can’t eat dried shiitake without soaking it in water first. 

You can’t just eat it as is!

Thanks to the sudden appearance of dried shiitake, today’s fruit gathering ended prematurely due to a rule violation.

* * *

Oh, this happened too.

Once again, the Demon King made time in his busy schedule to visit us.

I promptly served him some dried persimmons.

He pops a piece of dried persimmon in his mouth and says, “Oh, this has a unique sweetness to it. It’s sticky and addicting.”

It seems he likes it.

“But, sweets like this are meant for women and children. When a man likes sweet things, it feels like we’ll be judged, so we end up sneaking to eat them.”

I know how that feels. 

Pride can weirdly get in the way, and it’s hard to order things like pancakes or bubble tea.

But with dried persimmons, it’s different. 

They don’t have a girly image, and guys can enjoy the sweetness as much as they want.

In fact, dried persimmons have a masculine, warrior-like image.

There’s even a famous anecdote about it.

“Back in my world...there was a military commander named Akechi Mitsuhide.”

“Mm-hm?”

“Unfortunately, he lost in a war and was captured and sentenced to death. On the way to the execution site, he asked for water because he was thirsty.”

It’s a famous story among history fans.

The guards escorting the war criminal didn’t have any water, so they reluctantly offered dried persimmons instead.

However, Akechi Mitsuhide declined, saying, “Persimmons are poisonous, so give me something else.”

“Upon hearing this, those around him laughed and said, ‘Why bother being concerned for your health now when you’re about to be executed?’”

“I see.”

“Akechi Mitsuhide then responded, ‘The one who carries a great purpose must hold their own life in utmost regard until the very end. They should not meet their demise until their ultimate desire is achieved.’”

“How inspiring!”

As a demon with the military spirit, the Demon King is delighted with the story.

“Indeed! To fulfill the mission given to us, we must survive no matter what! That is what true warriors need! I shall spread this story throughout the army and use Akechi Mitsuhide as a role model for my soldiers!”

“Mmhm.”

“...By the way, are these dried persimmons poisonous?”

“They’re safe. That was just a superstition.”

And so, the Demon King left, having enjoyed the story of Akechi Mitsuhide as a great conversation topic.

...

............

...Crap, I got it wrong.

“It wasn’t Akechi Mitsuhide; it was Ishida Mitsunari...!”

Mitsunari!

It was actually Ishida Mitsunari who lost at Sekigahara, beheaded, and had that story about dried persimmons!

I only realized my mistake after getting into bed that night!

But you know, it’s not entirely my fault. 

Those two guys have a lot in common.

Both have “Mitsu” in their names, and their personalities are similar in that they’re not just warriors but also intelligent. 

They also tend to be disliked by their superiors or colleagues because of their arrogance.

Plus, they both served under a powerful leader who died, and shortly after, they also lost in battle and died. Isn’t that similar?

No?

So, can you forgive me for mistaking those two?

Ahhhhhhh! Why did I confuse Mitsuhide, who’s known for kumquats, with dried persimmonssssssss?!

At least they both have something to do with fruits! Right?!

And that’s how my mistake spread in this other world—the name of Akechi Mitsuhide became associated with dried persimmons.

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akechi mitsuhide was also called 'kumquat head'