With the sun threatening to breach the eastern horizon, I gazed upward. “... Barry?”
“Yes, Fischer?” he replied, standing right beside me and also staring skyward.
“Have you thought about how the frack we’re going to explain this giant bloody tree?” My eyes roamed over its branches high above. “It’s taller than the big pineapple.”
“What’s the big pineapple?”
“Pretty self explanatory, mate. Picture a pineapple, but it’s really big....
2024-03-07 08:00:05 +0000 UTC View PostWith the sun’s approach, the sky’s color was starting to change. As Barry and I crossed the sand flats on the south side of the river, I marveled at the sea of stars above us. They’d soon be banished, replaced by a brilliant blue of day. I tried to burn their image into my mind as and breathed deep of the cold night air.
The moment we entered the forest near New Tropica, an odd sensation shattered my mindfulness.
The bag of pearls on Barry’s belt thrummed with power and we...
2024-03-06 08:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post“Thanks for your hospitality,” I said, not missing the ugly look the two nobles shared as we strode into their home.
“Of course,” the woman replied, her voice sickly sweet. “I am Joanne, and this is my husband, Tom. What are your names?”
“I’m Fischer, this is Maria, and that’s Borks.”
Joanna nodded as she removed a notepad from her pocket and wrote them down.
That’s not ominous at all... I thought, glancing at Maria.
“So,” Tom s...
2024-03-04 08:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post“To define enlightenment is to shackle the fledgling meditator with an unfair burden. What it means to be enlightened is subjective, and it falls upon each child to traverse this path alone, lest their road be ravaged by false information.”
Excerpt from Prologue, House Kraken Manual
In the predawn hours, George, the lord of Tropica, let out a slow sigh.
He’d had a terrible sleep, riddled with interruptions that he couldn’t explain. The fi...
2024-03-01 10:14:24 +0000 UTC View PostI blinked to clear my vision, but the words remained.
New Village established!
Scanning...
“Scanning?” Barry asked. “What does—”
Scan complete.
Village already exists.
Upgrading existing village: Tropica...
I shook my head, but before I could turn to Barry and ask him what the frack was going on, the System spoke up again.
[Tropica has evolved ...
2024-02-29 08:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostBeneath a blanket of stars, I took a deep breath, delighting in the scents of salt spray and fresh air that assaulted me.
“Are you sure this is necessary, Fischer?” Barry asked from behind me.
“Positive, mate. If I don’t get an influx of chi, I’ll probably pass out the second we try to create something.” Not at all sharing his sense of urgency, I smiled as a fish nibbled the bait at the end of my line. “Besides... it won’t take long.”
Barry sighed. “All r...
2024-02-28 06:21:13 +0000 UTC View PostHello, friends.
I come bearing fixes and adjustments!
They're spread out over many chapters and Patreon's formatting is unhinged so I've linked a google doc with headings and subheadings.
If you can't be bothered reading all of them, the entirely new scenes are:
Chapter 31 under 'Trent's Awakening Adjustment'
Chapter 68 under 'Operation Sticky Fingers'
Chapter 70 under 'Operation Sticky Fingers'
Chapter 72 under 'Operation Sticky Fingers'
Chapter 90 under 'Tre...
Hello, friends.
I'm taking a week off from posting new chapters.
There are two reasons:
First, I'm editing book 2, and I want to smoothe out some inconsistences / add some bridging sections to improve the flow of the story. I'll be posting any chapters / words I add, so there will still be some content coming through.
More importantly, I'm taking some time to re-immerse myself in books 1 & 2 before moving forward with three. I am a pantser by nature, but a...
2024-02-21 08:31:57 +0000 UTC View PostI jumped down to the sandy soil as we crept toward the giant tree
Its trunk was as wide at the base as a house, and its canopy reached high into the sky before fanning out. Large chunks of earth lay around it as if the tree had shot from orbit and landed there. It looked like a giant oak, but with one distinct difference.
Its bark was blue.
It was the largest tree I’d ever seen, bigger even than the one growing within the church.
“Hang on...” I said. “...
2024-02-19 09:25:35 +0000 UTC View PostWhen I arrived at the meeting place, a blur of blonde hair and cute freckles flew at me.
“Oof!” I said, bracing myself as Maria slammed into my chest.
“How did it go? Is everyone okay? Did you get the bushes? What happened? Was that your blast? The big white pillar that lit up the sky?”
“Whoaaa,” I laughed, holding up both hands at the barrage of questions. “One at a time.”
“Sorry.” She squeezed my chest hard enough that I thought she might crac...
Here it is, friends.
Some of your ideas were honestly hilarious.
May the best animal win.
(More in the comments because we hit the Patreon limit)
2024-02-15 08:37:11 +0000 UTC View PostCorporal Claws grinned and puffed out her chest as adrenaline coursed through her tiny little body.
She was the most powerful otter in all the lands and seas, and now she had tamed the sky.
Claws stood atop a mountain of the fallen, their unmoving bodies a monument to her prowess. This was no metaphorical hill—oh no. She quite literally stood atop dozens of the cultivators that had been bagged up like grains of wheat and were being flown through the sky by her valiant steeds. 2024-02-15 08:13:49 +0000 UTC View Post
Hello, dear friends.
The epilogue for book two has gone up. Now that I'm going into the whole-book editing phase, I wanted to ask if you had any constructive feedback for me. I have a lot of things that I want to sharpen and improve, but as the author, I can be blind to issues.
If you don't have any feedback on book 2, I would still love to know what you do and don't like about the series as a whole. IE. Do you love the cooking scenes, or are they a little tiring...
2024-02-14 08:32:46 +0000 UTC View PostOn the outskirts of Tropica, Lieutenant Colonel Lemony Thicket's canopy shook in anticipation.
Most of her friends were on a mission far, far away. It was the perfect opportunity.
Master will be so happy, she thought as the image of his grin passed through her awareness.
Lemon had been storing energy and waiting for the perfect chance to strike, and her core vibrated with excitement now that the moment was here. Ever since she had contacted the child beneath the gro...
2024-02-14 08:17:13 +0000 UTC View PostThe epilogue of book 2 will go out tomorrow, which means book 3 approaches.
We haven't done a poll for a lil while, and I thought it would be fun to have you guys throw out ideas, then make a poll with the answers. Feel free to also suggest a goofy name to go along with it.
Two of my ideas to get your creative juices flowing:
- One of the seagulls from the raid on Gormona.
- A kleptomaniac racoon.
Unlike some of the past requests for ideas, this one will...
2024-02-13 00:06:24 +0000 UTC View PostBeneath the sea of birds still milling over the capital city of Gormona, I trudged along with a smile on my face.
As I glanced back, I saw that my wares were still in order. It hadn’t taken long to find a cart big enough to carry all the still-unconscious cultivators. I’d removed all their collars and stacked them as comfortably as I could, making sure they all had room to breathe. Right at the front of the cart sat my prized passiona bushes, all three of them having large clumps of...
2024-02-12 08:08:30 +0000 UTC View PostOf all the secrets Ellis expected to uncover during Operation Sticky Fingers, the king of Gormona taking steps on the path of ascension wasn’t one of them. Ellis’s mind worked to unravel the implications as he stared down Augustus Reginald Gormona, his former monarch and apparent cultivator.
How many of the royals are cultivators...?
Trent wasn’t one. Despite being first in line to the throne, the prince had been unaware his father was a cultivator. Had he perhaps k...
2024-02-09 07:51:28 +0000 UTC View PostHigh above the streets of Gormona, Corporal Claws commanded the sky.
Evening air rushed past, tickling her whiskers and making a toothy grin cross her face. She stood tall on her noble steed, reaching her forepaws high and praising the moon.
Bill, her formerly obedient steed, let out a loud honk as her weight shifted, so Claws sat back down, giving him a mighty pout as she did so. First he’d brought more creatures than her, now he dared order her around?
Th...
Barry’s breath caught as he took in the royal library. Shelves stretched three meters up to the roof, running in long lines he couldn’t see the end of. The purple light of Borks’s portal was the only thing that lit the room, and as he closed it, darkness descended.
A flame came to life, battling the gloom for dominion.
Ellis carefully closed the lamp’s hinged glass door and glanced up, his eyes severe. “If anyone causes me to set fire to the library, I will curse you a...
As I fell toward the grove below, cold night air rushed past me. The crescent moon was high in the sky, and I bathed in its light, intent on soaking up as much as I could before Bill and his army of seagulls blocked it out. As I considered the mass of gulls, I shook my head, smiling to myself. This night was shaping out even more chaotic than I’d anticipated.
I hoped they were all having as much fun as I was.
I landed silently in the grassy grove, and still releasing a steady ...
Augustus Reginald Gormona, ruler of every tree, stone, and building below him, gazed out over his kingdom. He stood atop a balcony in the highest spire of the castle, leaning on an ornate metal railing and letting the winter air wash away his troubles.
“It’s a beautiful night, Augustus,” Deklan said, leaning against the rail beside him, his metal armor clinking.
“Isn’t it? There are few things that calm my nerves so.”
Though he usually found solace in the heat of...
2024-02-02 08:30:46 +0000 UTC View PostI woke to the sun beaming in through the tent’s opening. A barrage of tiny licks rained down on my chin.
“Cinnamon?” I asked groggily, squinting against the morning light.
I wasn’t sure what Cinnamon was doing here, but who else had such little kisses? Still blind, I reached my hands up… and found a chihuahua. Borks yapped at me, his tail wagging despite his incredulity.
“Sorry, buddy,” I said, smiling at him. “You’re so small that I thought you were a bunn...
2024-02-01 08:02:57 +0000 UTC View Post“There is an arrow trained on your head, stranger,” the camouflaged man warned, glancing at me.
I had Borks gripped by his scruff, stopping him from insta-murdering the misguided spearman. I looked over my shoulder, and sure enough, there was a teenage boy with a bow. It was pulled back, the tip of the arrow trained on me. There was one reason I hadn’t taken both of our attackers out—well, one main reason: Maria was in no danger.
Neither of these men—likely father and so...
2024-01-31 08:17:41 +0000 UTC View PostWith the morning sun peeking its orange-hued rays through the trees above, Cinnamon wiggled her cute little tail. Small as her task may be, she was excited to be included in the mission. She took one last bite of her sugarcane stalk, licking up every last drop of its sweet juices. She swallowed, the chi-enhanced stalk making her body tingle with power.
Despite how powerful she had become, some of her base instincts remained. Nothing within the forest could hope to hurt her, yet she stil...
2024-01-29 09:03:52 +0000 UTC View PostRiding unseen currents of air high above the coast, Warrant Officer Williams—affectionately dubbed ‘Bill’ by his master—let out a mighty yawn. Pelly had taken the night shift, allowing him to rest. They would have to take turns over the coming days, lest exhaustion overcome them, causing their intricate plan to fall apart.
Seeing the formation scattering, Bill dove toward the ground, unleashing mighty kicks through the air until the formation came back together, heading north. 2024-01-26 08:00:07 +0000 UTC View Post
A breeze blew through the surrounding trees, their leaves rustling softly. Ethereal moonlight shone down from above, illuminating the lake’s surface. Flames licked at the campfire behind us, its orange glow joining the blue-white light of the moon. Within that beautiful vista, Maria’s line tore through the water.
“Fish on!” she repeated, laughing as her eyes grew intense.
The fish darted to the right, trying to escape her clutches—there was nowhere to go. My fingers twit...
2024-01-25 08:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostNight had well and truly descended within the forest, the light of day having slowly bled over the western horizon. The campfire was both a welcome source of heat and light, the latter of which was currently illuminating an absurd-looking creature.
Maria and I shared a worried look as it kicked around on the hook. Borks slunk over to sniff at it, taking care not to come within touching distance. Most of its features were that of a fish; it had tiny scales, fins, and was a light-brown co...
2024-01-24 08:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostBeneath the pink and orange sunset of a beautiful winter’s day, two brothers stumbled arm in arm along a seldom-traveled dirt road.
“We’d better get back to the farm,” David slurred as they both wobbled.
“Aye.” Trevor upended his bottle, taking a deep swig. He sighed with the burn that ran down his throat, warming him from the core. “Da will tan our hides if he learns we been out drinking all day instead of working.”
A few seasons back, things had kicked off ...
2024-01-22 08:14:43 +0000 UTC View PostBeneath the descending sun, Sue’s and Sturgill’s eyes were distant. Dual waves of power flowed from them as they entered their names into the System.
“Happy?” Maria asked, giving me a rather judgemental look while trying her best to hide the amusement poking through.
“Very,” I replied, grinning.
I extended a hand to Sturgill, then Sue, shaking them in turn. “Welcome to the ranks of the heretical, Fat Rat Pack and The Beetle Boys.”
Sue pouted. “I’m s...
2024-01-19 08:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostBeneath the shade of my deck, I cut into the tuna. Recalling the memory of a particular video on Earth, I did my best to emulate the movements of a Japanese master of his craft. Surprisingly, the flesh came away just as I imagined. There was no way it should have worked out, so I took a second to thank the System and the levels of fishing and cooking it granted me. As much as I railed against the thing and its annoying messages, I couldn’t process the tuna so efficiently without it.
B...
2024-01-18 08:02:56 +0000 UTC View Post