Hello, my friends! This has been a long time coming - Red X Wolf is now in your inbox!
$5+ tier has the ebook (I wasn't able to do the audiobook this time, as it's being produced by a major publisher.)
Take a look at the email address you shared with Patreon to find an email from BookFunnel containing the ebook. Shoot me a message if the email doesn't make it to you and I'll get it fixed asap.
I'd love your review on 2025-03-13 21:28:10 +0000 UTC View Post
“I recognize you.”
These were never words Goldie wanted to hear from a guard, but thankfully, this one seemed to have been permanently stationed at the Class Shrine. She simply shrugged and kept her eye on the man as she waited for her turn to enter the small building. “It's probably the hair, yeah? Tends to draw the eye. What's going on today? I've never seen a line for the shrine before.”
The guard continued staring at her, as if burning her features into his memory, whi...
2025-03-12 11:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostGoldie strolled through the bustling streets of the citizens district, an area which was a sharp contrast to the slums she still called home. The familiar sound of coins softly jingling in the pouch at her waist helped her to blend in as she walked past dozens of people with enough money to their names to buy literally every single building in the slums if they had so desired.
Months had passed since her escapade with Bob, and she had put the cute… no, scrappy young man out o...
2025-03-10 11:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostThe bustle of the underground arena washed over them as they stepped into a large basement that had likely been illegally excavated to be larger. Goldie’s heart rate increased as the cheers and complaints from a lively crowd rose and fell, punctuated by the sounds of fists meeting flesh. The scent of sweat, blood, and anticipation overwhelmed the gentle perfume washing off her hair, clogging her nostrils enough to force her to sneeze.
“What is this place?” Bob looked arou...
2025-03-07 12:00:10 +0000 UTC View PostGoldie leaned back against the brick wall of an unknown shop in the merchant district, hands relaxed at her side—though she was prepared to lash out with her scissors as needed. “Might as well get comfortable; there's a long cool down before I can do that again.”
She watched as the man, just a couple years older than her, assessed his options, his gaze sweeping down the alley before returning to meet hers, hesitation flickering in his eyes. Slowly, as if against his better judgmen...
2025-03-05 12:00:09 +0000 UTC View PostDusk had fully settled in by the time the door to Damage Dealers X-L was opened for the second time that day. The magical deadbolts came free, and the door parted to allow the golden-haired young thief to step out of the building, twirling a new pair of battle scissors in either hand. “Got what I wanted and made a new friend. Even secured a new source of income. Nice.”
Goldie waved over her shoulder at Xander, who was staring at her through his shop window, shaking his head in disgr...
2025-03-03 12:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostThe odd pair hashed out their agreement over a subdued bout of haggling. Xander seemed reluctant to press too hard, as he simultaneously didn't quite believe she would be able to follow through, while also needing her to put in her best effort if he was going to get what he needed to achieve Perfection.
“I get you the material you need, and if it works for increasing your skill level, I get to buy any items from you for personal use at cost plus ten percent.” Goldie l...
2025-02-28 12:00:09 +0000 UTC View PostAdvanced Skill: Dreadful Locks: Level 9/10.
Requirement to advance to level 10:
Sense danger before your hair does. 49/50. Stop people or yourself from being poisoned by food or water. 50/50. Remain underwater for 240 continuous seconds. 0/1. Absorb a full lightning bolt’s worth of energy. 1,000,000,000/1,000,000,000 watts. Unlock Common, Uncommon, Rare, and Epic locks in any circum...
2025-02-26 12:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostIt was easy to see why Cutter had recommended the place, as even the simple, gleaming blades on display in the window called out to her each time she passed by. The thick, magic-imbued glass rebuffed her grasping hairs’ tentative attempts to take the shiny items, which somehow made both her and her hair even more eager to acquire one of them. Goldie had spent a week walking past the weapon shop tucked away in the artisan district before making her choice.
Running a finger over t...
2025-02-24 12:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post“It's been a while, Rebecca Punzel,” Schule-tyrant called out in a voice that seemed more tired than the golden-haired woman remembered. “Even so, I thank you for remembering where you came from. As you know, I'll make sure this goes where it should.”
“I go by Goldie Locks now,” the seventeen-year-old woman who had once been a resident of the orphanage informed the headmistress, even as she handed over a thick purse stuffed to bursting with silver coins. “It's good to see ...
2025-02-21 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostWith each step deeper into the slums, no matter how familiar the territory was, Goldie felt a sense of suffocation as the ‘guards’ flanking her began to get more antsy. Every instinct she had was screaming at her to make a break for it, to run, but she couldn't… not yet.
The first guard took a deep breath, letting it out as a long *hiss* between clenched teeth. When he spoke, his voice had lost its earlier hint of civility, shifting back into a suspicious, dangerous growl...
2025-02-19 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostA solid year passed as Goldie fell into the intense routine of waking early to cut her hair, rushing to get official training, working the day away picking pockets and grabbing small goods, then finishing out her day by sparring against Chay’s crew. After so long practicing together, she’d practically adopted all three of them as her brothers—only excluding Chay, as he was supposed to be her boss, and that always… confused things.
As she prepared for yet another day of the same,...
2025-02-17 12:00:10 +0000 UTC View PostGoldie's arms continually ached from the effort she put into improving her combat skills, but that didn't stop her from sprinting to the instructor’s house each morning as soon as the gates of the orphanage unlocked. Though she was always late, tired, and hungry, she stepped into the practice room ready to face the grueling exercises Cutter had in store for her.
Each day, she grew ever so slightly more adept, becoming quicker on her feet and more fluid with her motions. Her first goal...
2025-02-14 12:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostHi friends! I'm looking to bring on a part-timer that can help me manage brand requirements and such in my company. If you are that person, or know someone who would be a good fit, please fill out this form or pass it on to them!
https://forms.gle/cmd1jyT1s9vGuGQG6
2025-02-12 17:31:39 +0000 UTC View Post“That boy is too dramatic by half.” Cutter’s voice was exactly what Goldie had expected to hear from the dangerous-looking man, a deep, raspy tone. He sounded like he had taken a blade to the throat and lived to tell the tale. “I'm glad you're here early; I hate staying up late.”
“Early bird gets the… um.” Goldie cut off her instant reply as he glared her down, letting the customer-service smile on her lips fade away to reveal her true discomfort with the situation. “H...
2025-02-12 12:00:09 +0000 UTC View PostTwo months later, Goldie the thief dashed across the rooftops, her hair swirling out behind her like a set of golden wings as she gracefully launched herself up and over a main street. She touched down almost gently on the other side, rushing toward the dead drop point for the coins she’d collected.
“Just gotta offload this, and I'll be only a silver away from full membership.” She murmured to herself as she moved along the now-familiar thieves’ road.
Actually acquiring en...
2025-02-10 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post“There's no way this is safe, and you can't possibly be serious about me jumping between rotten roofs!” Becca called out to Chay as he ran away over the rooftop—the so-called thieves’ road. She slowly picked her way after him, legs trembling from the effort of putting one foot in front of the other. With each step, she searched for the next handhold before moving along, doing her best not to look away from her chosen path, over to where the entire city was sprawled out below&...
2025-02-07 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostThe merchant district was bustling with its usual energy: a cacophony of voices, noises, and smells. There was a clear demarcation between those who lived in this district and the slums, notable not only by how they dressed but how they paid for the goods they purchased. Those from the merchant district or better paid with coins, sometimes arguing about the price, but more often than not, simply handing over the shiny metal discs.
Anyone from the slums negotiated as if their lives...
2025-02-05 12:00:04 +0000 UTC View PostBecca had never imagined herself turning to a life of crime, but thanks to her hair, there seemed to be no other viable option. Even as she trudged through the slums, the words Chay had needled her with echoed in her mind. She murmured them out loud as justification for what she was about to get herself involved in.
“No one’s going to hire me now that I've been labeled as a thief.”
Finding herself standing in a dimly lit alley, Becca stared at the actual ...
2025-02-03 12:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostIt took a single week for her hair to get her fired.
“Herr Sorin, I swear I didn’t-”
Becca bit her tongue as she stumbled out of the doorway of the curio shop, her hand flying up to her mouth and coming away with a spot of red blood.
“It's not just the missing items, it's also what people have been telling me about your sudden surge in affluence.” Sorin’s chin dipped as he slowly moved his head in refusal. “Can you truly tell me th...
2025-01-31 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostThe most impressive thing about the Class Shrine was how clean it was. Not a speck of dust could be seen, leaving the walls, floor, and actual plinth in the center perfectly white. There was no strange energy in the air, just a bored guard leaning on his spear at the entrance while waiting to collect the kingdom's tax.
If Becca hadn’t known this place was some sort of system nexus point, she would’ve never guessed it was such an important facet of everyone’s life. “Kind of looks...
2025-01-29 12:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostThe next morning, Becca was waiting for the headmistress next to the gate, nervously pacing back and forth. At eight o’clock on the dot, the steely woman marched out of the building, past Becca, and took a step out the gate before turning back and motioning for the young woman to join her. “Well? Are you coming or not?”
“Yes! I just had… I wanted to ask-” A familiar twinge in her chest caused Becca to grip at the space over her heart, wincing with pain. Then her eyes w...
2025-01-27 12:00:04 +0000 UTC View PostNearly two years later, Becca was a well-known fixture in Sorin’s Curios. She’d never once been late and often stayed well after closing to help make sure the shop was ready for the next day.
As a sales girl, all she really needed to do was greet the customers when they came in, then help them find anything specific they were searching for. She had consistently gone above and beyond, and the results of her work were easily noticeable when Sorin compared the activity of the area when...
2025-01-24 12:00:09 +0000 UTC View PostFor the first time in a little over a year, the golden light of the system swirled and coalesced into a new skill written out on Becca's arm.
Basic Skill ‘Hair Helper’ has reached level ten: Perfection!
Advanced Skill unlocked.
Advanced Skill: Tangle Tamer: Level 1/10
Tangle Tamer is a continuous passive skill which causes the hair growing from the crown of the user's head to become [Minimally]...
2025-01-22 12:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostBecca shifted her weight from foot to foot, not allowing herself to stand still long enough for the warmth in her legs to cool down. Even as the apprentice baker casually tossed two loaves of bread on the counter and stared her down, she barely acknowledged his work. Her eyes scanned the street, as always making sure she had her escape routes planned if a brawl broke out. A strand of her golden hair popped out of place, falling across her right cheek, only to be impatiently brushed back behin...
2025-01-20 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostBecca walked into the headmistress’s office, her face set in the carefully neutral expression she had long since learned to wear at all times. Though there were clear signs of hard living and malnutrition on her face, the girl had luxurious, shoulder-length golden hair. She knew perfectly well how eye-catching her hair was and used the brief moment when the hard-edged, matronly woman was staring at its luster to try and suss out the meaning of this meeting.
No one in the orphanage was...
2025-01-17 12:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post*Tap.*
The tension in the room was thick as Queen Brutehilda impatiently waited for King Frieden to arrive. She sat on a throne which looked more like a slab of crude stone chiseled into shape than a proper chair, the only seat in the room which could support her enormous frame. The queen was far too muscular for standard wooden chairs, with shoulders broad enough to put seasoned lumberjacks to shame. Her arms bulged grotesquely as she shifted around in annoyance, ropey veins a...
2025-01-15 12:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostThe barrel continued to tirelessly run in a straight line toward the border of Verdelune. All too soon, the day gave way to night, and the landscape was shrouded in velvety darkness.
Despite the intense discomfort of the confined space—the jostling and the subdued but continuous noise of the hydraulics forcing the legs to push ever onward—to the duo who had just had their lives turned upside down, this was simply a safe mode of transportation gently rocking them into a fitful ...
2025-01-13 12:00:03 +0000 UTC View PostThe two-legged barrel burst through a sudden opening in the darkness, leaving Danielle and Kota blinking in the sudden daylight. Both of them were silent as the contraption continued barreling along, jostling them back and forth.
Opening his mouth to offer condolences, the Artificer glanced at Danielle and thought better of whatever he was about to say. Instead, he looked down at his hands, where the last of the blisters along his fingers were fading back into healthy ski...
2025-01-10 12:00:02 +0000 UTC View Post*Blam!*
The Enchantress skid to a halt as the wooden endcap of the bookshelf she was passing exploded into a shower of splinters. Dropping into a crouch, she clutched at her furiously pounding heart and slowly crept forward once more. As Danielle peeked around the wooden barrier, she watched as Gasteel tossed his smoking musket to the side.
“At this range, that could’ve been your head, Comte,” the baron growled, tilting his head side to side and cracking his neck be...
2025-01-08 12:00:07 +0000 UTC View Post