tinyprancinghorse

They are Smol - and Tenured! One Year Smolniversary Smolsmas Special!

A/N: URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Smol is now ONE YEAR OLD! Can you believe it? I habeeb it. A few excited reddit posts on /HFY/ turned into suggestions for a Patreon, and that spawned a Discord which now has a Twitter/Pinterest/Instagram/Youtube - and then we’ve got a Minecraft server in the mix as well - 

Smols are growing stronger

And to celebrate, yes, there’s your weekly dose of shitposting, but also we’re doing s...

Happy Smolniversary, Everybody

Patrons,

It's been a whole year since we started this wild ride. What was originally a shitpost I made during a dissatisfied career working for an idiot has turned into it's own thing - a living, breathing community that I'm proud to be a part of and that I'm humbled that you've been supporting all this time. 

Whether you're a new patron, or have been supporting us for months, thank you. If you're just at a dollar, or are the To...

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 10

The layout of the Silver City Human district made a tremendous amount of sense, if you were the type of paranoid asshole who believed that everyone was out to get you. To the other species - all of whom had never seen human architecture up close or in person, there was nothing amiss; The partition wall was there for everyone’s safety and to stop people from wandering in and out, the mixed markets had plenty of relaxation pods, 24/7 food courts, mixed-species seating and entertainme...

Don't worry, this much fire is normal

Henlo my patronies - I love u so much! I wanted to give you a quick update, especially if you're not on the Discord server, cause you might be wondering what the hecc is going on with the posting schedule and smol in general.

So there are a few things going on, some good, some bad, but all are taking my time up to some degree. To begin with - I ended up getting a new job! This is a good thing, but it's kinda eaten into my usual posting/writing time - I've had to refigure ou...

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 9

A/N: Hey everyone - sorry for the delay in posting! I was getting over some health issues that suddenly cropped up, and they really kinda just... stopped me dead in my tracks. But the troubles are behind us, and we should be back to our regular posting schedule!

To make up for the lack of smol, please accept this late superpost!

- - - - - - - -

Gentle Expanse was an alien planet, and if this is a fact that surprises you at this point in the story, I honestly...

Please declare all therapy animals before boarding

This includes therapy roombas. 

....no I promise we won't make him ride in the cargo hold with the other robots pls let me look at tumbles-

SmolCity(tm)

Yanno, that was a limited-edition Hank Smollington action figure, Grzengren....

But sometimes you just wanna play hard-light house. 

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 8

“Bokka-bokka-bokka-bok.”

“Bokka-bokka-bokka-bok.”

“Bokka-bokka-bokka-bok-”

“Eggsmerelda!” Juan Esteban scolded, looking into the chicken carrier he was pushing out of the transport. He was answered with four flaps of the hen’s wings, before a full-body shake and an inquisitive stare. “Don’t you look at me like that! The pilot did his best.”

“Bok.”

“Nuh! That sinking feeling in your gut isn’t the precursor to something terr...

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 7

Just so you know, the website does have a permanent darkmode.

Anyway:

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”

“Look, I know, I’m sorry-” Jothan cooed softly, removing the last pissbottle from the floor. His captive roomba continued to shake violently, googly eyes staring accusingly at his roomate/owner.

“I just got into some shit, yanno? Like, You find your tribe, man, and you just-”

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee” The roomba ...

Embrace

And a little something for our paid patrons only. <3

We're trying various artists and styles, so if you see one you'd like for us to commission, just screm at me!

SNUGGLESMUGGLING IS A CRIME

If you or someone you know is snugglesmuggling, please call our free tip hotline.

Remember, only you can stop the illegal flow of smols

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 6

It is said everyone knows - in the way that “everyone” knows things - that liquor, tortilla/potato chip and porno sales skyrocket before a bad storm. You know the type of storms, the ones that are guaranteed to knock out power? Where the weatherman comes on and tells you this is a bad one, to shelter or leave the area, etc., etc.? See, liquor, chip and porn sales skyrocket before a bad storm because there’s not much to do in a blackout other than drink, snack and uh… well. En...

....Shitpost Outtakes. For what it's worth.

Trash Dino 2: Oh God there's more

Hey everybody! Happy Tuesday!

We're gonna keep trying to give y'all some good stuff every Tuesday, so to that end please inflict upon your bodies the new Trash Dino.

.... once your'e done with that, have a palette cleanser with another good art by the up and coming artist @Rasupdoo!

The tol is just trying to help, sheesh. No need to be so ...

They are Smol - and It's a Smol World: Chapter 5

Now in the movies, when a ship warps into a new star system they’re able to instantly come in at orbit of a planet, drop shields, deploy fighters, shoot guns, activate evasive maneuvers and all sorts of wonderful things that Hollybollywood would have you believe human starships can do. The real truth of the matter is that’s all bullshit. Once you warp into a system - even a well mapped system - you’re effectively blind until the EM spectrum can come back on and let you ...

Tuesday art and update!

So good news: I have more time for smol, for setting things up, and for making content!

Bad news: I got fired today.

Anyway. I'll be ok! Thanks to your support, and the fact that I was expecting this to happen, I can transition to a better job hopefully sometime soon.

But you're not here for that. You're here for the updated art! The uh... well. I was going to have a little more ready for today, but the whole "your employer is on fire" thing kinda derai...

They are smol AND INDEPENDENT - AMERICA ONESHOT

The glow flickered before his tired eyes, and Glenn smiled. 

“And we have how many of these things?”

Jonathan looked at the clipboard tablet, scrolling through the declared items list. “About 5,000 of these for this station. We can hand out about 10 per employee.”

The glow changed to something a bit more frantic, sparks spreading across Glenn’s desk. He picked up the device and twisted it’s base - the sparks exploded out in more fury, coat...

We gonna try somethin' new every Tuesday

And hopefully, y'all will like it. 

BEHOLD: ART.... TUESDAY!

... it's a work in progress. BUT.

This is what happens when you let a smol to his own devices. This is also what happens when you commission the amazing Rasupdoo to do arts for you!

2019-07-03 03:35:30 +0000 UTC View Post

Stuck in geometry, pls halp

Hey there smols!

Sadish news - I'm stuck at a trade show all week, and my laptop isn't cooperating; I can't access scrivener to write the next chapter.

I get home on Friday, so I'll try to write and post one over the weekend tho! Sorry for the delay!

ilu all.

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 4

For the first few weeks, they fought against the machine - purposefully working slow in protest.

The next few weeks after that, they returned to routine, albeit grumbling all the time.

However, It was within Month 5 of the great staffing, resupply and fitting of Reach, in the Year of Our Lord 2184, in the third dimension, in the Sol system (wherein Humanity was born and accidentally yeeted into the stars) whereupon arguably the most momentous occasion of the last 40 years...

You're... certain this is a human saying?

The colonists have set up shop, and are more than happy to share their culture and fast fashion to the rest of the species!

Just... well. Don't worry about what the shirts say. It's more about how you feel wearing them!

....that'll be $944.86 please.

They are Smol – and it’s a Smol World: Chapter 3

Pip

“[-And now, in local news. Another illegal personnel smuggling operation was busted earlier today operating around the Gas Giant Cloudpearl; Senate Teams lead by the H.S.T.’s own regional law enforcement discovered a network of hollowed-out asteroids at the edge of the gravity well. As they were discovered within 5 calendar years of creation squatters’ rights will not-]”

Pip

“[-letion of the dome, which allows for their own day-night rythm.]�...

"Technically" Sentient: Chapter 22

Ikor closed his eyes, ignoring the incessant stream of data being blasted at him through the integrated heads up display of his helmet. He focused on the subtle things, the tug of gravity at his stomach, the deck vibrations caused by the Outrider’s thrusters, and the tightness of his armor around his chest. It wasn’t his first time being pulled from dead asleep to full combat readiness, and it wasn’t the first time he’d volunteered for a zero-reconnaissance, zero-in...

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 2

Ngruzren-of-Arzgr was unceremoniously woken up yet again by that damnable alarm clock. He had a love-hate relationship with it; On one hand, it made sure he was never late for school or work. On the other hand, he hated constantly waking up on the floor.

But maybe that’s where he belonged.

He got up, tossing his blanket carelessly to the side, stretching and rolling his shoulders and hips to work out the kinks from sleeping so haphazardly. Plastered aggressivel...

They are Smol - and it's a Smol World: Chapter 1

WE ARE BACK TO LIGHTHEARTED SHITPOSTING AND HIGH ADVENTURE!

The alarm clock - or what we would call an alarm clock - went off at 6AM, it’s gentle waterfall and rustling wind tone getting louder and louder as time marched inexorably forward.

The blanket den did not stir.

The alarm clock - what we might still call an alarm clock - began to vibrate somewhat insistently, the nightstand that it was placed on rattling irritatingly.

The blanket den did not stir.

The a...

"Technically" Sentient: Chapter 21

A/N: Hey y'all! Just in case you're not on the Discord yet - Amph is in the middle of his college Capstone course, and the one class - just the one he told me about - is an additional 20hrs/wk of work. 

big yikes. So TS is moving to a twice-per month schedule, but the chapters are longer! 

In fact, here's a new, long chapter right now!:

Darren sat, calm, collected, and quiet, waiting for whatever came next. A p...

BE AWARE: THEY WILL GET INTO THE VENTS

A General Updoot

Hey patrons!

I'm writing this to you literally as soon as I got home - for those of you who aren't on the Discord or aren't following me on Twitter, I've been at a conference in Las Vegas for work for the past week. I've been totally unable to work on TaS in the downtime, and I apologize for that.

Technically Sentient also didn't post because Amph is in the middle of Finals, and well. We love you all a whole lot, but I want him to graduate, yanno? Those s...