DC : Crisis of infinite hunger : Chapter 12

Chapter 12 : Stuck in a Bind

Barry Allen trudged down the hallway toward the living room, one hand cradling the heavy swell of his stomach. The hallway felt longer than usual, or maybe that was just his newfound fullness weighing him down. His enlarged belly let out a deep, satisfied groan. It wasn’t discomfort—far from it. The virus that he'd unknowingly contracted was driving him to stuff his face with any high-calorie, dense junk he could find. The insatiable hunger was always there, gnawing at him until he caved. Although it didn't take much to make him cave these days.

He'd really been trying to cut back after Batman had grilled him at the League meeting the other day, but as the smell of leftover takeout wafted down the hallway from the lounge, it seemed he was already on an unstoppable path to gorge himself, already losing track of how much he'd eaten today. Although he’d stopped counting after his third Big Belly Burger combo earlier—what was the point when he’d still been hungry right after?

As he turned the corner to get into the lounge, he tried to squeeze himself through the doorway.

Thud.

Barry blinked, twisting his head to confirm what his gut already told him. He was wedged tight, his belly jammed firmly into the wooden frame.

“Oh, come on,” Barry muttered. He pushed against the frame with his hands, his boots squeaking uselessly on the hardwood floor. The wood creaked ominously, but Barry didn’t budge. His belly refused to give way.

“Great. Fastest man alive, stopped cold by a door.”

“Not today…” Barry grunted, kicking his boots helplessly against the floor. “Come on! I’m not that big!”

In the kitchen, Iris West-Allen sat surrounded by a fortress of junk food. Boxes of half-eaten pizza, open chip bags, and soda bottles cluttered the counter as she focused on tearing into her latest target: a dripping, overstuffed burger. Her shirt was dotted with crumbs, but she didn’t care.

Then she heard it—Barry’s muffled voice echoing from the lounge.

“Iris! Iris, I need help!”

Iris groaned mid-chew. “Can’t I eat in peace for five minutes?”

“It’s urgent!” Barry’s voice strained.

She rolled her eyes, taking one last monstrous bite before tossing the burger onto a napkin. “This better be a good reason,” she grumbled, her swollen stomach brushing against the edge of the counter as she turned toward the doorway.

The kitchen door into the lounge gave her a clear view—and she stopped dead, blinking.

There was Barry. Wedged like a cork in the lounge doorway, arms flailing, his costume stretched to its absolute limit.

“Oh, Barry…” she said, half-laughing. “Seriously?"

Barry glanced up, his cheeks red beneath his cowl. “Don’t just stand there—help!”

“I’m sorry, I’m just taking it in,” Iris replied, smirking as she leaned against the doorway. “So, let me get this straight—you outran paradoxes, death, and aliens. But a doorframe is your mortal enemy?”

“Ha ha,” Barry said dryly. “Are you going to help or just heckle me?”

“I haven’t decided yet.” Iris folded her arms. “Can’t you just do your… vibrate-y thing? Phase out?”

Barry blinked and shifted uncomfortably. “I tried that already. The other day.”

“And?”

“And my body…” He gestured vaguely with his head. “Jiggled. Uncontrollably.”

Iris blinked. “What?”

Barry groaned. “It was like…” He paused, his face scrunching. “You know how gelatin looks when it wiggles? Like that, but—ugh. Forget I said anything.”

Iris stared at him for a long moment, lips twitching. “You’re telling me you—”

“Yes! I jiggled! It’s not funny, Iris!” Barry protested, his cheeks burning brighter.

“It’s a little funny,” Iris replied, grinning. “Alright, fine. Hold still—”

She heaved herself forward through the kitchen doorway to help him—

Thud.

Her smile vanished as her hips hit the kitchen doorway. Iris froze. Slowly, she looked down, then back up at Barry.

“…Oh, no.”

Barry blinked. “Wait. Did you just—?”

“I’m fine!” Iris snapped quickly, shoving forward against the frame. Nothing budged. Her stomach pressed stubbornly against the wood, refusing to give way.

Barry’s mouth twitched. “You’re stuck too.”

“I am not stuck,” Iris said through gritted teeth, trying again.

“You are absolutely stuck,” Barry replied, his tone somewhere between smug and gleeful.

Iris shot him a glare. “Barry, I swear—”

Barry chuckled, shaking his head. “At least you’re not alone.”

“Oh, no, don’t try that ‘solidarity’ nonsense with me, Barry Allen. I am missing snacks because I came to save you.”

Barry smirked. “Save me? Iris, you’re stuck too. Face it—we’re in this together.”

“And now you’re stuck with me!” Barry quipped. “I’d call that quality time.”

“Don’t make me regret marrying you,” Iris muttered, though there was a glimmer of a smile as she leaned her head against the wood in defeat.

Barry reached for his communicator, fumbling with the buttons. “We need backup.”

“Wait, wait, wait—you’re not calling the League,” Iris said instantly, voice sharp.

“Of course not!” Barry replied. “Batman would kill me. I’m already on thin ice.”

“Then who?”

Barry sighed. “Wally.”

“Wally?” Iris groaned. “Oh, great. Not only am I stuck, but now my nephew gets to see me like this. He’s never gonna let this go.”

Barry gave her a tired look. “Iris, have you seen Wally lately? I don’t think he’s in any position to judge us.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Before Barry could answer, Wally’s voice crackled through the communicator. “Yo, Barry! What’s up?”

The sound of munching came through loud and clear.

Barry pinched the bridge of his nose. “Are you eating?”

There was a pause, then a muffled, “No. Well… maybe.”

Barry sighed. “Look, we’re in a bit of a bind here. I need you to bring the Titans over.”

“Wait, why? What happened?” Wally asked, a hint of curiosity.

Barry hesitated, glancing at Iris, whose glare promised retribution if he said too much. “…I’ll explain when you get here.”

“Alright, cool. Be there in a flash!”

As the call ended, Iris groaned, leaning her head against the frame. Barry looked back at Iris.

“So, uh… you mad?”

Iris let out a long sigh. “You owe me food after this.”

Barry leaned back against the frame, grinning. “Fine. I’ll buy dinner.”

“Dinner? Try dinners, plural,” Iris shot back. “And dessert.”

Barry snorted. “Deal.”

As silence settled in, Iris’s stomach growled loudly.

Barry grinned. “We’re really gonna be here for a while, huh?”

“Shut up, Barry.”