The Broad Side of a Barn: Chapter 10

“What do we do?” Kazuma whispered to Darkness as they crouched over the bloody and comatose demon. “We can’t use healing magic on her, it would hurt her.”

“Um, perhaps…a kiss? She could get some essence that way,” Darkness suggested. 

“Yeah, but like, you, or me? You’re the man right now, remember.”

“Definitely you. I worry about this body’s vitality,” Darkness whispered. 

“Right. Uh, you Ok with me, you know…kissing another woman?”

“Well, for one thing, you are me at the moment. For another, it is to save her life, which is different. And finally…the thought of you kissing another woman…is very enticing at the moment.”

“Yeah, uh, most guys are kinda turned on by yuri.”

“I…do not think that is entirely due to my, shall we say, maleness, at the moment, Kazuma. But, as you are in the body with the greater stamina…best you do it.”

“If you’re sure…” Kazuma bent over Lolisa, who was breathing shallowly, with cuts and bruises all over her body we’d barely managed to clean. Even so, she was quite beautiful in the dim moonlight, and he closed his eyes, pressing his lips to hers. 

For a few heartbeats, nothing much seemed to happen, aside from a faint tingle on his lips that was a bit odd. Then two hands shot up and tangled themselves in Kazuma’s hair, pulling him closer as Lolisa’s tongue desperately probed his. Sudden euphoria flooded Kazuma along with a sense of lassitude, and he hungrily tried to kiss Lolisa more deeply. 

However, that lasted only a second or two before Lolisa shoved him off of her with a choked cry of, “NO!” 

Kazuma blinked a few times, then sat up as Darkness hurried over to Lolisa, who was coughing weakly and curling up into a ball, shuddering with obvious distress. 

“Lolisa! Please, talk to me,” Darkness begged, cradling the succubus’ head in her hands. 

“D-don’t…don’t touch me…I’m…I’m so hungry…I…I could lose control…” Lolisa whimpered. “Just…let me die…”

“Absolutely not! You saved our lives,” Kazuma said. “Can we use a healing spell or something on you?”

“No…a-a potion won’t work, either. Holy…holy magic hurts me,” Lolisa wheezed. 

“Well, we are not letting you die,” Darkness said firmly. “How did you even know where to find the goddesses?”

“I…I didn’t know about Eris…But Aqua’s not hard. She…she’s always drunk at the Guild this time of night…”

“And you just flew in, shouted neener neener, and kited two angry goddesses all the way back to the mansion?” Kazuma asked, but Darkness elbowed him. 

“Not the time. Lolisa, can you use another dream to feed on us? Would that heal you?”

“No,” Lolisa whispered, her eyes squeezed shut. “The dream…it’s too…too complicated. I’m…I’m barely holding my essence together. When…when an Archdemon strikes you down…well. I guess I’ll be seeing them again soon…”

“No, let me kiss you again,” Kazuma said, gently cradling Lolisa in his arms. “Would that be enough?”

“M-maybe. We…we could try,” Lolisa said timidly. 

Kazuma leaned in to the kiss, but in the distance, he heard a bell toll. His head began to spin, and he slumped over. When he woke up again, he sat up, and everything was a lot clearer. He could clearly see a naked Darkness holding Lolisa to her breast, and Darkness was squinting and looking around.

“My…my eyes have gone dim, but…Kazuma, are we back in our bodies?” she asked.

“Huh. Guess it was the stroke of midnight or something,” Kazuma said, scooting back forward. “Lolisa? You still with us?”

“Yeah…sorry…I…I know I’m a burden,” she said, her voice slightly muffled from being pressed against Darkness’ breasts. 

“Perfect. Alright, you two start making out,” Kazuma said, and put his hand on his already stiffening erection. “I’m going to enjoy this.”

“W-wait!” Lolisa said, squirming weakly, and Darkness helped her sit up. “Um, i-if you’re going to do that, um…could I have some? Semen…w-well…er…it’s particularly nutritious to a succubus…”

“Lolisa, are you asking to eat my fiance’s seed?” Darkness asked. 

“N-never mind, I knew it was-” Lolisa was shut up when Darkness very firmly kissed her, then groaned when Darkness began to rub at Lolisa’s groin at the same time. Kazuma could see faint wisps of energy being drawn from Darkness into Lolisa, and a few of her cuts and scrapes began to knit shut.

“Hold on, get her out of those clothes,” Kazuma urged. “Um, you know. To make it, er sanitary and stuff.”

Darkness paused and gave Kazuma an amused look, but then let Kazuma pull Lolisa’s skirt and panties off, while she helped the succubus out of her top.

“Are…are we really doing this? I…I could hurt you both,” Lolisa whispered, though she was blushing mightily and breathing more rapidly. 

“If we split the essence drain between us, it should be non-lethal, yes?” Darkness prompted. 

“Well…yes, I guess. I’m hurt pretty badly, but even after tonight, you have a LOT of vital essence Darkness, and Kazuma’s not bad either,” Lolisa admitted. 

“And you’ll die without it, right?” Darkness prompted. 

“Well, um, you have given me enough essence that I…probably will be fine? As long as I get more later,” Lolisa admitted. 

“Hmm, not good enough,” Darkness said with a shake of her head. “We owe you a great deal. And…I must confess… having Kazuma watch while I kiss you…it is exciting me.”

“I’m…running out of reasons to argue with you,” Lolisa said, twining her arms about Darkness, and locking lips with her again. 

Despite the fact that he’d had sex once in the morning, dream sex three times, then two more times in Darkness’ body, felt he had at least one more in him. He began to rub at himself, only for Darkness to beckon him closer. He scooted forward, and to his delight, even as she massaged Lolisa’s pussy with one hand, began to stroke Kazuma’s shaft with the other. He groaned, and would have returned the favor, if Lolisa hadn’t already been knuckles deep in Darkness already. 

To his surprise, after a minute of that, Darkness suddenly pushed Lolisa up, laying down and having the succubus straddle her face. “Suck him off, Lolisa. I want to see it! I want to see you drink of Kazuma!”

Lolisa didn’t argue, even as Darkness began to eat her out, the succubus eagerly locked her lips around Kazuma’s dick, using one hand to gently cup his balls, and the other to keep his shaft straight. The sensation of her sucking at him like she was trying to get his soul out was like nothing else. The contact had a narcotic effect, and Kazuma felt an overwhelming wave of pleasure and desire. Unfortunately, it only lasted a few minutes, before he pumped a meager stream into Lolisa’s mouth. 

Sighing in contentment, Lolisa licked the last drops off of Kazuma, then arched her back and moaned in pleasure. Kazuma sagged down into the hay, and a moment later, passed out, unable to keep his eyes open after that. 

“I…I think I’ve had…oooo, oh Darkness, I’ve had mmmm, enough!” Lolisa gasped, shuddering and moaning.

Darkness slowly let Lolisa roll off of her, sitting up and wiping her mouth with her arm as Lolisa sank back in the hey next to the snoring Kazuma. “You are completely sated, then?”

“Mmm, my wounds are mostly healed now. I…I’ll definitely live, now,” Lolisa said, smiling stupidly up at Darkness. “That was…that was amazing. No one…one has ever tried so hard to get me off before…That wasn’t my first threesome, but…wow. It was definitely the best.”

“It was my first,” Darkness said, and lowered herself onto Lolisa. She kissed the succubus again, then leaned over to whisper in her ear, “But now that I am back in my own body…I find myself unsatiated again. As you have exhausted my future husband, I request that you finish the job.”

“T-Tina, I-” Lolisa sighed as Darkness lifted herself up again, then pressed her own sex against Lolisa’s mouth. The succubus eagerly began to apply her tongue, and Darkness shuddered. 

“Make it hurt, Lolisa. Give me the exquisite pain and pleasure I so crave!”

A few pink sparks flew from Lolisa’s fingers, and began arcing over Darkness’ body. She cried out in pain and delight, and began to grind against Lolisa reflexively. This time, it lasted for nearly half an hour before Darkness gave one final moan, then collapsed atop Lolisa.

After a few moments, Lolisa wiggled out from under Darkness. She was panting, and all her wounds had completely vanished. Indeed, her body was glowing with a faint aura of power now. Lolisa grunted and rolled Darkness over, then leaned over her belly and closed her eyes, putting her ear there. After a moment, she sat up and sighed in relief. “Good, I can sense that life inside you. Seems like I managed to not touch that sacred spark. I just…” Lolisa looked helpless down at the two sleeping lovers. “...I think I’m falling for you both, hard. I…I told myself…not again…”

Lolisa bent her head for a moment, then shook it. She lay down in the hay across from Kazuma and Darkness and closed her eyes. A few moments later, nothing but snores filled the barn. 

A toe nudged Kazuma, and he groaned. “Ugh, it’s too early…”

“It’s past nine, Kazuma. Wake up! You’re not even dressed yet. And seriously, in a barn? Ew. There’s horse crap everywhere!” 

Kazuma suddenly sat up, blinking rapidly, and found Aqua frowning down at him. Chris was crouched by the door, and had out a whetstone, over which she was running one of her daggers. She no longer had the feathery cloak or long hair, looking like a normal girl again. Except for how her eyes were glowing softly as she glared at Lolisa, who was crouched in a corner with her arms wrapped around herself and looking utterly terrified. 

“Chris,” Darkness said with a sigh, standing up and going over to Lolisa. “Stop trying to terrify her.”

“What? I’m just keeping my gear in good order,” Chris purred, even as Darkness helped Lolisa to her feet, though the succubus immediately hid behind the Crusader, who didn’t seem to particularly care that she was still as naked as the day she was born. 

Kazuma felt mildly embarrassed, but he got up and stood with Darkness and Lolisa as well. He glanced out the window, and was only mildly surprised to see that not only was the mansion rebuilt, but it seemed to have been improved with a glass sun room, an indoor pool, and what appeared to be several new guest bedrooms. 

“Uh, thanks for fixing the house. How the heck did it get destroyed, anyway? Were you two trying to kill Lolisa that hard?” Kazuma asked, trying to resist the urge to cover himself up.

“We didn’t do much of the damage. That was Maxwell,” Aqua said firmly. “Any of you three remember?"

“Um, I do, it’s just…could we um, maybe get dressed first?” Lolisa squeaked. “I’m not, uh, I’m not super comfortable talking to two goddesses naked…”

“Why, got something to hide?” Chris sneered, standing up and pocketing her whetstone.

Darkness opened her mouth, but Lolisa put a hand on her shoulder. Taking a deep breath, Lolisa strode forward and planted herself in front of Chris. “No. I don’t. Examine me all you want. Check my sins. I’ve got nothing to hide from you, Lady Eris. My soul isn’t squeaky clean, but I’m not the monster you paint me as!” 

“Hmph.” Chris paced around Lolisa, examining her head to toe. Once, twice, three times. At last, she stopped in front of Lolisa, a sour expression on her face as she tapped her foot. “You’re hiding something.”

“From a goddess!? I’m even NAKED. You’re the one who weighs souls! Weigh mine! What do you see?!” Lolisa demanded, and grabbed Chris’ hand, placing it on her own breast with a shudder.

For a moment, Kazuma thought Chris would blast Lolisa to bits right then and there. Instead, she held her hand over the demoness’ heart for a long moment. At last, she sighed and dropped her hand. “Well, you’ve got more counts of adultery than most, several counts of larceny, and you apparently killed a man once. However…I also know the man you killed…and you’re absolved of that one.”

“He was raping his own daughter!” Lolisa snarled, her face going beat red. “What was I supposed to do when I found out?!” 

“Exactly what you did. Sheesh, you didn’t even feed on him, just poisoned the fucker. Like I said, you're forgiven. And, well…really your adultery isn’t worse than your average human sex worker, so…” Chris grimaced. “Fine. You’re the exception that proves the rule! Just…go get dressed. I’m used to seeing humans naked after judging so many of them, why does half the population imagine themselves naked after they die!? But, well…you’re clearly uncomfortable.”

Kazuma, Darkness and Lolisa hastened towards the mansion, but behind them, he saw Aqua hug Chris.

“I’m proud of you, Kohai! See? Sometimes, the rules are dumb and we should just have fun.”

“...thanks, Senpai. But what if the other Senior Gods or the Chief find out?”

“Then we tell them they’re doodoo brains and we can do what we want with our own world! Even be nice to liches and succubi!”

“...please tell me that sweet woman Wiz isn’t a lich…”

“Fine, I won’t. But she’s a great baker! Oh, feel free to try to kill that jerk Vanir, though. He’s the worst.”

“VANIR THE DESPOILER IS HERE TOO!?”

That was when they hurried inside the mansion, and shut the door. 

Lolisa ended up borrowing one of Megumin’s dresses, as they were roughly the same size, while Kazuma and Darkness changed into their own clothes before hurrying back downstairs. There, they found Chris and Aqua eating a breakfast of-

“Hold on, where did you get Starbucks?” Kazuma demanded. 

“Japan,” Chris said, sipping at a latte and taking a bite of a breakfast sandwich. “Don’t worry, I got you some too.”

“Just because I’m stuck in Belzerg doesn’t mean Eris is,” Aqua said, drinking her own extra sugary concoction. “Here, Darkness, I got you a mocha frap.  You get a caramel macchiato, Lolisa. It’s great, try it!” 

“Matcha latte for you, Kazuma. It was your most common order,” Chris said, handing him his own drink. 

“Is this from your homeland, Kazuma?” Darkness asked curiously, examining her beverage.

“Er, sort of? It’s American, but…I did like hitting up Starbucks from time to time. Seriously, though, you can just…go to Japan?” Kazuma asked, sitting down and sipping at his beverage while taking the sandwich Chris handed him. 

“I’m literally a goddess. Time and space are just suggestions,” Chris said with a shrug. “Shoot, I’m judging souls at the same time I’m talking to you.”

“Yeah, it’s so boring being limited to one body,” Aqua complained. 

“You spend half your time sleeping and the other half drunk,” Kazuma said in disgust.

Aqua blushed, then hastily changed the subject. “So, anyway, Maxwell. You two don’t remember anything?”

“No, I’m afraid not,” Darkness said. “Who is this Maxwell?”

“I do. He’s the Arch Demon that Alderp has bound in contract to him. He’s been living in the basement of his mansion. The reason Alderp goes through so many staff? He’s feeding them to Maxwell to torture to death,” Lolisa said grimly. “I’ll show you right where, though I can’t say I’ll be much help fighting. I did level up last night from, um, er…anyway, I’m on your side!”

“Oh? You think we’d take you with us, just so you could stab us in the back?” Chris growled, leaning forward. 

Lolisa bit her lip, then glanced at Kazuma and Aqua. “Well…”

“No offense, Lolisa, but you’d probably be better off going back to wherever you live or staying here. Eris and I can handle this. Don’t worry, I don’t think you’ll betray us,” Aqua said, putting a gentle hand on Lolisa’s shoulder.

“No, Lady Eris is right. An unbound demon COULD do all sorts of things,” Lolisa said. She took a deep breath, then fell to her knees, taking Kazuma and Darkness’ hands. 

“Uh, Lolisa, I’ve sort of already agreed to marry Darkness,” Kazuma said, sweat breaking out on his forehead. 

“Hush, Kazuma,” Darkness shushed. “Lolisa? Do you wish to swear fealty to us?”

“Something like that,” Lolisa said, trembling all over. “My…my name isn’t Lolisa, you know…”

“Wait, hold on, are you-?!” Chris began, but Aqua punched her in the arm, and Chris grimaced and went silent. 

“It isn’t?” Kazuma asked stupidly. 

“No, Kazuma. Demons do not give their names, else they could be controlled by mortals,” Darkness said, her brow furrowing. “Lolisa, what are you-”

“Kirayama. My…my true name is Kirayama. If you say it…I will bound to you,” Lolisa whispered. “Please…please say it. Both of you…”

Kazuma looked at Darkness, who slowly nodded. “Kazuma, repeat after me, though use your own name.”

“Er, alright.”

“I, Lalatina Ford Dustiness, Heir of House Dustiness…”

“I, Kazuma Sato, Boyfriend of House Dustiness…”

Darkness’ lips quirked, but she continued on. 

“Do receive the oath of Kirayama and accept your fealty, given freely and in good faith. As you have pledged yourself to me in loyalty and service, so shall I be to you a true and just lord. I shall defend you from harm, uphold your rights, and grant you the lands and honors that are yours by right. Let Lady Eris and Lady Aqua bear witness to this bond, and may they judge between us should either break this sacred trust.”

Kazuma repeated the words, and Lolisa shuddered when they had both spoken her name. Then she said, “Um, this is backwards, but, I, Kiryama the Succubus, do hereby pledge my Soul and Loyalty to House Dustiness, and to Lady Lalatina Ford Dustiness, and her consort, Sir Kazuma Sato Dustiness. My Heaven smite me and Hell consume me should I forsake this oath.”

““Witnessed, and received. The light of the gods smile upon you both,”” Aqua and Chris said in unison, and a beam of light shone through the new windows to envelop all three. 

Lolisa cried out in pain, and her skin began to smoke, so both Darkness and Kazuma jumped in front of Lolisa to shelter her. 

“Ack! Sorry, sorry, that’s just sort of natural!” Aqua said, waving her arms and making the light go away. 

“It’s…it’s OK. I…I am judged in the Light of the Gods,” Lolisa, groaned, getting to her feet with Kazuma and Darkness help. She panted a bit, leaning on them, then met Aqua and Eris’ eyes defiantly. “Now, do you believe me?”

“We do,” Aqua said, and after a moment, Chris nodded reluctantly. 

“So, an Archdemon named Maxwell has taken contract with Alderp?” Darkness asked, her expression darkening. “That is Heresy and Treason. He will burn for this.”

“More than that, it’s an existential threat to this entire world. Maxwell the Adjuster is a Duke of Hell. He’s actually above me on the power rankings,” Aqua admitted.

Chris blew a raspberry. “Yeah, but my Senpai is so cool, she can smoke him anyway! Beat you in a one on one my ass.”

“So, is he like, the same rank as Vanir?” Kazuma asked curiously. 

“He is, but unlike Vanir, that’s not just a golem or projection we fought last night. That was Maxwell themselves,” Aqua said darkly. “And also unlike Vanir, he isn’t just causing some minor mischief I can overlook.”

“Seriously, you just OVERLOOKED the Duke of Depravity being in our realm!?” Chris demanded. 

“He’s more like the Count of Tomfoolery at this point. If I thought he was actually a threat I’d have iced him. Frankly, he’s so whipped by Wiz I don’t even worry about it anymore, I just mess with him because he’s annoying and it’s fun to kick his ass,” Aqua said with a grin. 

“If you say so, Senpai. But we agree Maxwell has to go?”

“Oh yeah,” Aqua said, her eyes smoldering with blue fire as she cracked her knuckles. “Him, and that fat bozo too.”

“I will fetch my bow. I do not understand how this threat has slipped my mind, but I will stand beside you,” Darkness said. “Additionally, we must inform my royal cousin. This is the sort of thing the Crown must be made aware of posthaste.”

“Uh, I guess I’ll get my bow, too? Chunchumaru is all bendy now,” Kazuma said, holding up Chunchumaru, which still seemed to be made of rubber. 

“That damn demon!” Aqua huffed. She took Chunchumaru in her hands. “You guys go get ready. Eris, help me fix this sword.”

“By ‘fix’ do you mean-”

“Yes, Eris, duh. Come on, it’s for my bestest bud Kazuma!” 

Kazuma and Darkness hurried to get prepared for battle, with Lolisa trailing behind. She helped Darkness and Kazuma both put on their armor, seeming quiet. 

“You, uh, OK?” Kazuma asked the succubus. “That oath thing…what’s it really mean?”

“I have to obey you now if you give a command using my name. Plus, if you say my name three times, no matter where I am or what I’m doing, I’ll be compelled to hurry to your side. Er, be careful with it, because if you and Darkness do it at the same time…bad things could happen to me,” Lolisa admitted. 

“So if I told you to make me a sandwich, or-”

Darkness cut Kazuma off with a glare. “Lolisa, neither Kazuma nor I shall ever use your name, save in the direst circumstance. I will accept only your word of honor as our vassal. Nothing more. I am not entirely certain how a demonic bond works, but you shall be treated as, ah…well. Our…mistress.” 

“Mistress?” Kazuma said, his mind spinning, while Lolisa perked up.

“You mean, I’m going to be-”

“Our closest confidant. And, ah…bedmate. At times,” Darkness said, blushing mightily. “Now is not the time to work all of that out. For now, you shall accompany us into battle and aid us as best you can.”

“Ok! Um, I’m not really good at fighting, but I’ll support you however I can, mistress!” Lolisa said eagerly. “Though, er, Kazuma, just so you know…I can still kill you if you’re not careful. Last night you were safe because, uh, well, I was draining two of you so the effect was safe. Also, we demons have a long history of…let’s call it malicious compliance. So be careful how you ask for that sandwich.”

“You are killing my dreams of a sexy succubus maid,” Kazuma sighed as he belted on his quiver. 

Lolisa grinned wickedly. “Oh, I think those are very safe, master. Though you should, perhaps, run that by your wife first. She is the Ducal Heir, and you’re just the consort.”

“Again, we shall discuss this later. Duty before pleasure,” Darkness said firmly, taking up her own bow and that bundle of spears she called arrows. “Now come. We have a demon to exorcise.”

When they came back downstairs, they found Megumin and Yunyun talking with Chris and Aqua. 

“-what do you mean, a demon destroyed the mansion!? Why didn’t you call me!? That sounds like a perfect time for an Explosion!” Megumin ranted. 

“Because the place was already wrecked enough, Megumin. Besides, we’re going to go fight him now, so you can unload then,” Chris sighed. 

“Oh, also, Megumin, Yunyun, this is my Kohai, Eris!” Aqua said, hugging Chris, who winced. 

Both Crimson Demons frowned. “Your…kohai? Eris?”

“Aqua, come on, you can’t just tell everybody that,” Chris complained. She gave Megumin and Yunyun a shrug and smile. “Look, whatever happens, don’t treat me any different. And I’m still Chris to both of you.”

“Um, OK, b-but…is Maxwell the Adjuster really here? He…he’s a Duke of Hell,” Yunyun pointed out. “That’s, um…that’s really bad.”

“Which is why we are going to fetch Iris and have her join us when we face him,” Darkness said grimly, striding up. “Megumin, Yunyun, you have met Lolisa before, yes? She has become my vassal and shall be joining our party.”

“Um, hi,” Lolisa said, blushing and waving. She’d gone back to her human disguise, though she still had on Megumin’s dress. “I sort of had to borrow your clothes, Megumin. Maxwell…sort of ruined mine.”

“Hmph. Well, I suppose I shall allow it, since it was an emergency. Though I will need to hear the story of why a waitress is becoming Darkness’ vassal,” Megumin said, her eyes narrowing suspiciously. 

“It was to protect her from Alderp and Maxwell,” Kazuma said, making up a lie on the spot. “She’s the one who ratted out that Maxwell was hiding in Alderp’s basement, and she was afraid of the repercussions of a commoner going up against the richest man in the kingdom.”

“Um, you do realize she’s, uh,” Yunyun blushed. “Lolisa…did you tell them…?”

Sighing, Lolisa dropped her disguise for a moment. “Yes, Yunyun, they know. It’s…a complicated story. But, basically-”

“She saved our lives, I think,” Kazuma said, rubbing his head. “It’s a bit muzzy. I think Maxwell has some sort of mind wiping aura because I can’t really remember a thing besides the fact that Lolisa said there was something bad in the basement, then there’s a…blank…and then I think Aqua and Chris saved us because they chased Lolisa?”

“That’s more or less what happened, but we’re short on time,” Chris said. “Come on. Let’s go get Iris.”

The party set out, and before long, arrived at the manor where Iris was staying, though she had already loaded up her carriage and was making ready to depart. Seeing Darkness approach, Iris clutched her sun hat to her head and hiked up her skirts to run over to her, with Claire and Rain trying to keep the exuberant princess contained. 

“Your highness!” Claire wailed, but Iris continued to run, heedless of propriety. 

“Cousin Tina! Master Kazuma! I feared you would not come to see me off, but-”

Iris slowed, a look of concern coming over her face as she saw the grim expressions. Then, Chris and Aqua stepped forward. 

“Iris Stylish Sword Belzerg,” Aqua intoned. “You are called to your duty by your Blood and Bond.”

“Daughter of Kings, your Realm demands your succor, and your goddesses demand your oaths be fulfilled,” Chris added. 

Claire and Rain, who had been hurrying after Iris, slowed, then gasped as Iris dropped to her knees, her sword appearing in her hands as she planted it before herself. 

“I hear and obey, O Gods. What do you call your servant to?” Iris said reverently. 

“Wait, what?” Megumin said. “Hold on now-”

“Shhh!” Yunyun hissed, grabbing Megumin’s arm and trying to drag her down to kneel. Lolisa was already in a posture of supplication, and Darkness had sank to a knee as well.

“Come on, Megumin, just do it,” Kazuma hissed, getting down beside Darkness and bowing his head. “Feels wrong to bow to Aqua, but…”

Hearing Iris’ words, Claire and Rain bowed down beside Iris, lowering their heads. 

“F-forgive us, Goddesses, we did not recognize you!” Claire gasped, and Rain nodded fervently. 

“Arise. You are our friends, and we come not to demand obeisance, “ Aqua said. “Rise, please.”

“Get up, we’ve got work to do,” Chris said grimly. 

Iris got back up, trembling slightly, but her expression was determined. “What need has the realm and the gods? The Blood of Belzerg stands ready to do her duty.”

“Alderp, Baron of Axel, is guilty of Heresy and Treason,” Aqua declared. 

“He has consorted with Demons of the blackest sort, and has summoned Maxwell the Adjuster, Duke of the Six Circle, in a conspiracy against the Crown,” Chris added. 

Iris’ eyes went wide, then a snarl curled her lips as a battle aura so powerful exploded about her and nearly knocked Kazuma down. “That pig DARES to threaten Our realm in such a way?!”

“He does dare. The gods demand his soul for judgement, and call you to be the executor of Our Will,” Aqua said with a grim nod. 

“I am not girded for battle, but I will come at your call,” Iris said, standing in her cream colored sun dress with blue ribbons.

Aqua waved her hand, and the dress was replaced by shining silver armor. Chris did the same for Claire, who started as her suit was replaced by knightly regalia emblazoned with the sigil of her house, and the silver coin of Eris. 

“Be blessed by the gods,” Chris declared. Aqua turned, and waved at the others. A glowing silver wand fell into Yunyun’s hands, while a smoldering staff of black wood with a crimson ruby appeared in Megumin’s. Chunchumaru, reforged anew and shining with power was given to Kazuma, while a golden circlet appeared on Darkness’ brow. Even Lolisa got a silver dagger, much to her surprise. 

“What, think I’d forget you?” Chris said with a wry smile. “I know your name now. I could banish you with a word.”

“Yes, goddess. M-my life and soul are in your hands,” Lolisa said, trembling slightly.

Chris gave over and put a hand on the demoness’ shoulder. “Oh, relax. If I wanted you dead, you’d be dead. Senpai, and more importantly, Tina, say you’re OK. So, I’ll trust you.”

“Thank you, Lady Eris,” Lolisa said, and bowed so low her head touched the grass. 

“So, uh, is this like, Epic Level gear?” Kazuma asked curiously. “How come you didn’t do this before?!”

“Because before, we were just up against this world’s Demon King and his generals,” Aqua said grimly. “Now? Now we’re up against a demon so powerful that he could destroy this entire universe. This isn’t the sort of battle you send mortals into without the right weapons. Or the right support.”

“We’ll do the heavy lifting. But be prepared. Maxwell can quite literally summon an entire legion of demons with a snap of his fingers,” Chris said. “When we say this is a threat to the entire world…we mean it. That’s why it’s not Chris the Thief that’s coming with you today. It’s Eris of Fair Fortune.”

“Such a grave threat…should we not summon my father?” Iris asked, sounding rather concerned. “He is a far more fearsome warrior than I…”

“We have not the time, and the gods know your courage. You are the champion we have chosen in this hour,” Aqua said, kneeling and smiling at Iris. She reached out and hugged the princess. “You’ll do great. We’ll be with you the whole time, OK? Just keep Kazuma safe. He’s a bit of a derp, but he tries hard.”

“Yes, Lady Aqua!” Iris agreed instantly, giving Aqua a good squeeze.

“Right.” Aqua stood up, and for once, she looked completely serious and competent. “Let’s do this.”

She strode out of the gate, and turned left. 

“Ugh,” Chris moaned. “Senpai! To the right!” 

“I knew that!” Aqua said, turning on her heel. 

“Maybe let Tina lead, Senpai,” Chris groaned. “She has a sense of direction…”

“I do too!”

“Senpai…you get lost on a one-way street…”

“That was one time!” 

“Per month…ugh, come on, you’re ruining the epic vibe!”

Kazuma chuckled. “Ok. Now it feels right.” He took Darkness’ hand and squeezed. “Let’s do this.”

Together, they set off for Alderp’s Mansion, and the lair of Maxwell the Adjuster.