Sad news

Hi friends. I have had such a horrible day. I am so sorry to come and share with you as I am in the middle of such pain and despair and confusion; I risk not making sense. But this community has supported me in a myriad of ways; especially in the difficult time I have had recently.

TW: Pets

Today I took Bomba to an exam at his vet. He had been having problems and pain with no.2. We tried antibiotics, diet change already and he was scheduled today for a sedated exam as his backside has been painful; too painful to examine properly.

About an hour after taking him in i was told to take him to an emergency center. Between both places (original vet and ER) we spent 12 hours today. He was diagnosed with a stricture likely from neoplasm. The treatment options are painful and reduce his quality of life. The vet had suggested euthanasia and said the treatments would be difficult on him. I brought Bomba home and he with with me now snuggling in bed. This is one of the hardest days of my life. I feel such guilt and pain having to decide what is best for him.

I don’t know what to do but I don’t want to be selfish. I don’t want him to be in pain. I don’t want to drag out his painful experiences- but the idea of saying goodbye to my best friend has completely broken my heart. He’s been with me through so much. I feel like I have failed him. He is so loved and babied and cared for- my beloved. Still I feel like I fell short. :,(( I can’t stop crying my head and heart hurt like never before.

I’m sorry for this triggering and painful post. I just needed to tell someone. I keep asking why? Why now? Things have been so rough. And now Bomba? I can’t imagine my life without him.

I wish I had something beautiful to share but I’m just not there yet.

Please keep him in your prayers. I pray for clarity. I pray to know what is best for him. I pray for his comfort.

Thank you for all your kindness and love during such a hard time.