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La Ron S. Readus
La Ron S. Readus

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Black Widow Trailer Reaction (VIDEO SCRIPT)

 

...K

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Readers, Black Widow’s getting the movie that she should’ve gotten back in Phase 3 of the MCU and it looks...alright. (Pause) If you like Black Widow.

And it’s not like I don’t LIKE Black Widow, or even the IDEA of Black Widow. I think she’s just fine and is capable of holding her own solo movie like this one they’re making. And from the look of the trailer, it seems to be the case.

/It looks like it takes place between the events of Civil War and Infinity War/

Which is probably the only place in the MCU timeline this could properly fit because (laughs) because it sure as hell aint taking place after Endgame, I’ll tell you THAT much

And it looks like this movie will finally give her a chance to showcase what all she can do

I mean, yes; we KNOW what she can do. We’ve seen it.

But we’ve seen it...while bigger and more impressive things were happening, so it kinda got drowned out

What I’m more interested in however, are the side characters.

/Specifically her quote unquote family consisting of Florence Pugh’s Yelena, Rachel Weisz’s Melina and David Harbor’s Red Guardian, because something tells me I’m going to find all three of them more interesting than Scarlett Johansson/

I’d lump Taskmaster into that pile, but honestly I’m...I’m tired of Marvel Studios trying to make their villains more realistic.

/Like, this is an Extreme Snowboarder with a Bow and Arrow that knows karate; get the fuck OUTTA here, my dude!/

Also, look! More “Incredible Hulk” General Ross! With no sign of his daughter!

Like, Marvel Studios REALLY don’t like acknowledging the existence of Betty, do they?

At this point, they’ll probably create an original character to portray Red She-Hulk, IF THEY EVER USE HER. WHICH I DOUBT THEY WILL!

As far as the actual movie itself? (Pauses, looks at camera and laptop and shrugs shoulders)

/I dunno. It looks like a fusion of Jason Bourne and Mission: Impossible took The Incredibles out to prom. Also, everything about this trailer screams “I SHOULD’VE CAME OUT IN EITHER 2016 OR 2017 BACK BEFORE SCARLET JOHANSSON SHARED OPINIONS ON THE INTERNET”/

Oh no, I’m not letting the fact that this should’ve been a Phase 3 film go. BECAUSE THIS SHOULD’VE BEEN A PHASE 3 FILM

With everything this trailer presented to us, it’s clear to me that I probably would care a lot more about Natasha as a character -- both before and DURING the events of Endgame -- if this came out...probably between Guardians Vol. 2 and Spider-Man Homecoming

Especially since before that, my name for both her and Clint in the Avengers movies beforehand were just “Gun Girl” and “Arrow Man”

I’m sure that if we got this movie back then as opposed to 2020 now that the character is canonically dead in the current MCU timeline, I probably would’ve cared more about the fact that she bit the bullet instead of Clint to get the Soul Stone

But unfortunately, at least for me

The creative decisions that were made for Black Widow over the course of the first 3 phases of the MCU made it difficult for me to care about her the way that this trailer is telling me to

Yes, I’m talking about Joss Whedon. Who ELSE would I be talking about???

I’m not the BIGGEST fan of this being the first Phase 4 film, though I am interested in seeing how they’re going to transition it when it comes to telling the story.

Are they just gonna Wonder Woman it, and have like, Yelena recall this adventure during Natasha’s “not as big as Tony Stark’s” funeral?

This, the side characters, and my irrational fear of possibly missing out on a key plot point for the next multi-film arc in the MCU are pretty much the main reasons why I’m not skipping this

But if that wasn’t the case, because of Marvel Studios constantly putting her in ensemble pieces where she is literally the least interesting person there -- Winter Soldier CLEARLY being the exception

Marvel Studios not realizing that people wanted this movie sooner than we’re getting it so that Natasha could’ve gotten this development while she was still ALIVE

And her being written irritatingly out of character just so Joss Whedon could say he turned his fan fiction into a movie

Watching this trailer would’ve just made me laugh and go (Too Late, Luthor scene)

But, I digress, Readers. Your homework assignment for the day

Write in the comment section what you initially thought of the first trailer to Marvel Studios’ Black Widow.

Are you genuinely hyped for the movie? Are you on that “I mean, it’s a movie” life, too? I’d LOVE to know your thoughts


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