Jumanji: The Next Level - Official Trailer (VIDEO SCRIPT)

Alright.

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Readers, I just watched the trailer for Jumanji: The Next Level and I’m...curious? Concerned? Concerious?

I say that because while watching the trailer, part of me was looking at the overall premise of the sequel’s story wondering if they really finished workshopping it before getting greenlit.

Like, yes; it’s great we get to see elements of the game that weren’t previously explored in the original OR Welcome to the Jungle

/But since this trailer has proven that anyone with a brain and a heat gun can hack this magic-ass game, is what we’re about to watch really count as genuine Jumanji?/

Because something tells me that Spencer’s doing what he’s doing NOT because he finds replay value in the bitch. No, something tells me he’s legit trying to exploit something now that Jumanji’s changed its form into a video game.

And if that’s the case, then part of me is hoping that what the game is doing is its way of combating whatever meddling Spencer is doing to it

Since y’know, the game knows when you’re cheating

(Jumanji 1: You Tried To Cheat?)

Another thing that has me concerned is it falling into the Hangover trap, specifically the Hangover Part II

Possible Gameshark plot aside, there’s a HUGE possibility that this could be a case of “Let’s do EXACTLY what we did last time...but BIGGER!”

And I mean, yeah. That works. But it’s BORING

Because we’ll know EXACTLY what’s gonna happen if they follow the formula verbatim, which, let’s just face it; they’re GOING TO DO THAT; I absolutely know better than to give Hollywood execs the benefit of the doubt when it comes to something like this

It doesn’t look like it’s going to take any risks, try anything COMPLETELY different outside of the angle they’re going with as to why the crew is back in the game

And it looks like its just another attempt at Sony trying their hand at making a franchise just for the sake of making a franchise

On the other hand, the other part of me is excited to see the Rock portray a character that’s not himself.

And out of all the people he could be, I’m glad it’s Danny DeVito

(hip scene)

I’d say the same thing about Kevin Hart playing Danny Glover, but I mean, from what we’ve seen in the trailer, he’s still playing...himself. Just 40 years older.

(stroke scene)

And while one of my favorite bits of the movie was seeing Jack Black portray a teenage girl in a non-stereotypical and/or sexist way, I’m not gonna lie. I’m still a bit worried about him impersonating a black man...for those same reasons.

Readers, I’m not...gonna...go out of my way...to see this...IMMEDIATELY...

Like I did Welcome to the Jungle before it, I’m gonna see all the movies that...I am ACTUALLY hyped for FIRST.

THEN either when I can catch it on the cheap or I still wanna go to the movies after seeing everything else...sure.

It’s a thing that’s out, so yeah. My movie theater has free popcorn on Tuesday, and I have 5 bucks for a matinee. The math is simple. BECAUSE I’M NOT PAYING FOR THE POPCORN

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But I digress, Readers; your homework assignment for the day

Write in the comment section below what your thoughts are regarding the trailer for Jumanji: The Next Level