46: Justice

hey Pete, sorry it took me a bit to answer. Yeah man, doing this is definitely healing. It's weird too, because it doesn't always feel that way, sometimes it feels like the opposite, like picking at a wound. I am not sure if I know how to describe it correctly, but its like picking at a wound to get all of the ugly stuff out, and then rearranging that ugly stuff into something artistic. And while you are doing it, it hurts and it is painful, and you would rather be doing something else entirely, but once you push through that for the first time and arrive on the other side, the feeling is so good and cathartic, that it made the whole process worth it. That is basically how I feel every time I finally finish a chapter. And for me, it is really nice that the end result is literally something tangible. Something that I can print out and hold in my hand. Some final "product" that kind of signifies to me: and now those painful memories have been transformed into this, and I am proud of this. So yeah, I would recommend it. I think the key is to do it like nobodies watching. As weird as it sounds, besides my wife and one very close friend, nobody in my life knows I am Joe. So even though a lot of strangers see my work, when I am actually making it, I don't have to think like "what if my boss sees this" or "what if my mom sees this" or my neighbor, or anyone really... I don't have to answer to anyone. I don't have to justify it to anyone. So that allows me to feel free when I do it. I don't think I could do this comic if I was a real comic book artist and I had deadlines, and editors, and other people telling me what I was doing right or wrong. So yeah, I hope that helps. FInd your way Pete. Find your way to make that pain into something you can hold. I think this is art in its realest form. Maybe why art was first created, back when we were finger-painting in caves. We wanted something to signify what we went through. Because holding it inside... only works for so long. And as weird as it sounds, maybe post it online somewhere, anonymously of course. Because you never know who will stumble across it and find meaning in it. Kind of like writing a love letter and throwing it into the ocean. I find there is something meaningful about putting it (or a copy of it) physically into the world somewhere. Because again, you never know who it will affect. And how much they may relate to it.

Agreed, great issue. If you don't mind me asking, do you find writing and publishing your history is helpful or cathartic in some way? I only ask, as a survivor of a different kind of abuse to you and I'm in a pretty dark place wanting a way out.

Great issue Joe

BigArty