5/10/2017: EAC Chapter 5
Added 2017-05-10 16:45:20 +0000 UTCThe hunt begins, as Amber begins chasing down the cheerleaders in earnest. Feel free to comment below on how you're liking the story, and which cheerleaders you're rooting for to find a way out. Or which cheerleaders you're rooting to end up as lesbian slaves, since I do know my fans haha.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/7zs5rfhrjinnlpx/EC%20chapter%205.pdf?dl=0
Comments
Hmm, mind control is easy. So maybe a lipstick fetish, and girls hiding in the shower fetish? haha
Sammynona
2017-05-12 15:47:39 +0000 UTCThis might be the first piece of media I’ve consumed that has 3/3 of my fetishes.
John
2017-05-12 15:09:41 +0000 UTCGreat job so far! I'd love to see Maria get taken next
Nexus
2017-05-12 13:57:24 +0000 UTCYou always give really good analysis! My theory regarding the lack of teamwork is pretty simple: Amber took out the leader first. Ashley might have been pretty well disliked by the team, but she was the dominant force everyone followed for one reason or another. With the sudden shift, nobody's really in-charge. Maybe one of the other girls will step up and take control, but who knows... Ginger's idea must have made some sense to herself, in her fight-or-flight mental state. When her own teammates are potential enemies, trust is in short supply. Who's to say if Amber doesn't have another mole in the group? But apparently the solo plan didn't work out for her. The mirror reveal was really good, I like Amber being playful with her prey. She's overconfident, probably because she has literal superpowers. I don't think anyone's ever really tried to hurt her, maybe because this is the first time she's done anything like this. Usually she just takes one person at a time, in private, so they're tranced before it occurs to them to fight back. Now she's up against victims who are prepared for her and each one's going to have to come up with countermeasures to protect themselves. The 'lesbians' line had me laughing. It's not often you read something like that, but we have Sammy to thank for being a very particular author in that regard. :) As for the miscalculation, you would seem to be right. Either it's a typo, or she really did take someone earlier and it hasn't been revealed to us yet. I assume it'll make sense by the end. That, or Sammy will be having her editors go through the story to pick out stuff like this before the story is published as an e-novella or something. Speaking of that, the commission artist I hired on DA is done with the first illustration. I'll be receiving it later today, and if it's good I'll follow through with illustrating each chapter and getting a cover page done up. Sammy can use them if she wants, but really it's just for my personal enjoyment. This is my pet project, and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. :D
ParagonRocky
2017-05-12 13:17:23 +0000 UTCHoly crap that's the best pun. That might actually make a good tagline. :P
ParagonRocky
2017-05-12 13:04:06 +0000 UTCWould like Jade & Maria to get entranced!
fman
2017-05-12 08:45:46 +0000 UTCI think you just turned the slasher genre into the flasher genre.
Alex B
2017-05-12 06:08:10 +0000 UTCProof Reading: (the brackets contain my correction) I don't [think] Ashley is that good of an actress. (page 5) It felt like a [I] kicked a steel plate. (page 6, replace the preceding "a")
larqven
2017-05-11 09:20:59 +0000 UTCThe party found each other quickly enough--or almost did, at any rate. Although Jade remains among the missing. We've got Amber, Ashley and Emma on their side. Heather, Maria and Rebecca on their side. Ginger who--decided that the bathroom was a solid bet. Well, useful to be sure for getting a drink and--using the facilities. Odd girl. She must be really impressed with the size of the mansion? These cheerleaders clearly aren't big on teamwork! Every woman for herself was practically what Heather said, and what Ginger, in effect, did. Not too smart of her, despite her rather odd belief that she was outsmarting potential issues. To be fair, being suspicious of Emma and Heather might have made some sense, as they were there first, but then why take so much time with Emma? 'Because Amber has a powerful sense of dramatic staging? Well, she does--witness what happened to Ginger, after all. Amber would seem to be her own worst enemy in that she's taking chances for the sake of being the 'monster'. She could have gotten clobbered in the bathroom, after all. Even a makeshift weapon could get her brained in a moment. Ginger might have failed, perhaps because she was too afraid to act aggressively and decisively. But fear is also a very powerful motivator where people might do things they'd never expect. Perhaps that was why Amber declined to corner the rat? "knowing they could be attacked by lesbians at any moment." fun line! 'Three to go?' Amber isn't counting Rebecca in her calculation? I suspect that she'll be the most difficult and sweetest triumph! At least, she seems to be the principal protagonist so far.
larqven
2017-05-11 09:17:06 +0000 UTCI love the progress of the story so far! The ending to this story was great. Also, I sent an email to the yahoo address you have listed on mcstories about proof reading. Is that the correct address?
Stephen Williams
2017-05-10 16:58:31 +0000 UTC
