Agent Emily Lockwood - A Perilous CYOA! (6.1)
Added 2024-09-07 20:26:39 +0000 UTCThe brand new Emily Lockwood adventure starts now! Emily Lockwood is beginning her new life as a secret agent! But will her first mission be her last? After months of training she's sent to a cosplay convention to find out what happened to two missing girls. To try and blend in Emily is wearing a tight fitting catsuit, but her revealing attire might get her more attention than she anticipated. If she's not careful she might just become the latest girl to be kidnapped!
She'll have to investigate the disappearance and hunt down the kidnappers, whilst trying to avoid the many dangers and perils that arise on her very first mission. You get to play as Emily, the options she chooses are entirely up to you. Take her down the wrong path and there are dozens of ways for her to become a helpless damsel in distress! This is a fresh start and a great jumping on point for any new readers! You don't have to know anything about the previous adventures to read this perilous story. All you have to do is try and lead Emily to safety. Will you be able to survive your first mission? It's time to find out!
Comments
Thanks for the feedback! I have been toning down the explicit endings as I wasn't sure if anyone liked them. I used to try and put more in toward the end, to signify that the danger was escalating as the adventure continued. I'm glad you like them as I do enjoy having that variety, I'll put a few more in the next one.
Markus Jones
2024-09-29 14:08:25 +0000 UTCHey, thanks for the feedback! Always appreciate if someone takes the time to let me know what they did or didn't like about these stories. It is harder to write that style of cyoa, with lots of alternate paths, but I'll see if I can sprinkle that in a little more.
Markus Jones
2024-09-29 14:06:16 +0000 UTCHi there, long time lurker who just recently returned to check out the new CYOA here. I really love your work and definitely want more creators like you that put so much passion into their work. The other comments said that they don't care/ like the explicit endings, I on the other hand tho am a big fan of them and find it rather sad and boring that most endings included only being clothed and then abducted. For me it lacks the variety of this to keep me entertained. I skilled through some endings because I realized they weren't much different from the others. Especially towards the later stage of the mission there could have been a bit more "dangerous" outcomes if Emily failed to save them.
deve
2024-09-22 07:19:55 +0000 UTCThank you very much for the new CYOA! I really enjoyed it. I do agree with the previous comment on the abruptness of some of the endings (I'm also not big on the explicit endings). I'd just add that a lot of the branches were really straightforward (and obvious) in that they were either "good choice or bad end" without much depth or opportunity for alternate plot progression (ex. the "Shops" branch in Chapter 2). I think it was "Coven of Lies" or even "A Fighting Chance" where it felt like there were all kinds of ways to get to the next chapter. It made it more interesting from a replayability standpoint. That said, I always love your descriptions of Emily's plights. Little things like how she "stares dizzily at the ceiling" really make the scenes shine. I also thought several endings were creative. Though it felt quick, I liked the whiskey scene. Her confrontation with "Titania" was also fun. I liked the story! Emily's insecurity about her place at the AKA made a lot of sense and it gives her something to work on in future stories. I also thought your use of flashbacks was smart to show how her relationship with Rachel evolved over time. It was a good way to present that background, as her AKA training could probably be a whole separate story of hijinks. Finally, there’s a bad link in Chapter 9. The “Rewind” link on the “TWO MONTHS EARLIER” page leads somewhere else in the story rather than a page back. Thanks again for the story. On a separate note, I keep getting internal service errors for Inklewriter (though it might just be me). Did the site finally go down?
desperadodragoon
2024-09-16 21:13:06 +0000 UTCThanks for responding! Looking forward to the upcoming stories and see how you adjusted to the feedback above!
Black-x
2024-09-11 22:41:03 +0000 UTCThanks for the feedback! I find it really interesting that the endings seem to have changed over time, it's certainly not intentional. I write them the same way I always have. Whatever I think of that's what I write. I'll have to go back and check out some of those stories you mentioned to see what I was doing differently. Also with the chloro resistance, she can only do that if she knows its coming. Same with the fight scene in the underground tunnel. She's able to prepare herself and focus on her training. If she's taken by surprise she's just as helpless as always.
Markus Jones
2024-09-11 17:02:10 +0000 UTCNovember 2nd
Markus Jones
2024-09-11 16:58:03 +0000 UTCHi! I hope it’s okay if I leave some constructive feedback! I have been a fan of the Emily stories and have enjoyed a lot of the stories. Been reading since season 1 before the Patreon started. My favorite stories have been Deadly Horizon and Emily the Working Girl. I noticed a trend in the newer stories lately that I haven’t been a fan of. I felt for the newer endings, a lot of the endings felt a little perfunctory and also sometimes abrupt. It lacked a lot of the intimacy that the perils of the earlier stories brought. I love the Chloro peril that Emily gets into, but it feels that they are just tacked on lately. Like all they get is a sentence then the story ends. Usually Emily gets the cloth, there’s no more description and then she gets carried away. It’s why I enjoyed Deadly Horizons and Working Girl so much. In those stories, there was a lot of details, there’s a sense a palpable peril when Emily gets attacked, there’s inner monologue on how Emily felt during the attack and we get an extended intimate aftermath. This seems to be missing during the latest story. I also don’t care about explicit endings but I may be in the minority for those. I usually just skip those when I’m reading. I love the premise of Agent Emily. It’s cool that we get to choose her costume and I do like the attention to it (though I wish it would play a bigger part in the story). The new organization and enemy faction seems interesting (though the villain in this story seemed pretty generic although that may be intentional). I do like that one ending where Emily was knocked out with the chloro pantyhose as it was very creative. I’m not sure I like Emily learning Chloro resistance though as that’s the main reason I read and enjoy these stories. Anyways just wanted to share my 2 cents! Hope that’s okay!
Black-x
2024-09-09 18:50:36 +0000 UTCEta on island of obedience
John Smith
2024-09-08 18:02:12 +0000 UTC
