in wonderland
Added 2023-01-04 17:54:17 +0000 UTCdeath on my mind
death on my mind
oh oh fear!
opening to the fear
reveals that it’s
excitement in disguise
as a great teacher said:
“altogether we are happy to die.
we take our joy along with us.
it is unusually romantic to die”
and so i slip into dream state
each night and each night
i die … last night i become
aware within the dream
i am on a rusty fire escape
in the middle of fertile abyss
and i say to myself
“this is not stable”
realize: the support
beneath me
is about to give way
i feel i am awake
everything is sharp and vivid
“i am going to die,” i think
who thinks…?
whom?
in that moment
the fire escape breaks
and in that moment
as the holding gives way
i open my eyes as wide as i can
i need to experience everything
i am still in the dream
falling
falling
falling
for a moment
i wonder if it were all real
who wonders…?
whom?
i am scared and exhilarated
then the scene fades
into grainy black and white particles
a million dancing particles, exuberant
and just like that
i am in another dream
another lush, subtle layer
death on my mind
oh, death on my mind
is this ‘dying’ but an entrance,
a portal into another dream?
another tragic, honeyed romance?
another wonderful, peculiar adventure?
