Cole and Nigel- part 2 (outdated Short Story)

!warning!

This story includes themes of homophobia, gay slurs, and misgendering

     “Right then, are we off to dinner?” Cole asked the room, slipping on his pressed gloves that had been neatly folded in his left coat pocket. Never the right.

     Vinnie placed his six-stringed base on its stand, Richard picked at his teeth in his reflection of the recording room glass, and Nigel slipped on his green pin striped trench coat.

     “You paying?” Nigel asked.

     “Of course.” Cole replied, placing a gloved hand on Nigel’s back to usher him to the door. “Cmon then, I don't want us missing reservations.”

     Cole opened the door, bitter cold slipping into the once warm studio.

     “Right, can’t have that,” Nigel chuckled as he stepped out.

     Richard breathed warm breath into his cupped hands, then rubbed them together as he followed Nigel.

     “Thank you,” Vinnie muttered, but turned to look back into the studio.

     Cole followed his gaze, knowing who had been left behind.

     “Jareth.” He called out. “Come now, I've got to turn the light off.”

     Jareth was still curled up on the leather couch on the other side of the studio, holding a paper and pencil. He was rubbing the flat nail of his thumb against his bottom lip again.

     His pale eyes flicked up to Cole, showing no indication of understanding. Yet, He unfolded his long legs and stood.

     Both Vinnie and Cole watched him from the door as he placed the paper down on the couch, then on the table instead. He slowly walked for the door, but hesitated again as he recognized he still had the pencil.

     Cole let out a slow through his nose and Vinnie shifted, making his shoes scrape against the sidewalk.

     “Bring it with you.” Cole said shortly, yet Jareth walked back to the table to place the pencil down. “Alright, come on.”

     Jareth slipped on his thick mink coat that hung just beside the door, his bland eyes briefly catching with Cole’s before he looked down.

     While the other lads packed into the car, Cole turned off the light and closed the door. Each slow breath swirled warm fog in front of his face, and he could feel the bite of cold reddening his nose. If he didn't get into the taxi quick, his cheeks would start flushing as well, to which Nigel would probably say something. Hah.

     Cole’s cluster of keys jingled as he slipped them from his pocket, his cold hands frigged as he tried leading the key into its slot. Finally, it slipped in.

     One, two, three

     He turned the key three times. Locking it, then unlocking it, then locking it, three times. On the third, he pulled the key out. If he didn't do it that way, who knows if it would truly lock.

     With that, he padded his pockets and hopped down the steps of the studio to the humming car. Nigel sat in the driver’s seat with the window down, his arm resting on the sill.

     “Oh- no need for that Nigel, I can drive.”

     “I didn't think you couldn't.” He said as he lit up a cigarette.

     “Pardon?”

     “Right, well I’ve seen you drive, haven't I? Come on and be a good lad, go round n’ sit next to me.”

     Cole cleared his throat,

     “Honestly Nigel-”

     “Oh don't start that with me now,” Nigel chuckled, reaching up to pat Cole’s
cheek. “Don’t want to be late.”

     Cole’s upper lip curled in ever so slightly, his chest puffing a tad.

     Cole knew the way to the Canterbury restaurant, and he knew how long it
would take to get there. He was the one setting up the whole dinner, he was supposed to be the one that drove.

     Cole stood and stared at Nigel, and Nigel at him with a twinkle in his eye. Vinnie and Richard chatted in the back of the car, the engine hummed, and fog still swirled from Cole’s nose with each huff.

     “You’re puffin your feathers at me, Cole.”

     “Stop that.” Cole muttered with a slight grin as he went around the car.

     Cole had attempted to guide Nigel through the roads. ‘Left here,’ he would say, to which Nigel would reply, ‘rest your mind, Cole.’ and pat him on the knee.

     Richard and Vinnie discussed male nose sizes and what they may entail, which lead to the curiosity of whether or not Tex- an olden rockstar- was truly an alcoholic.

     “Oh sure he is.” Richard insisted. “He’s a rockstar.”

     “Not anymore..” Vinnie replied.

     “Not an alcoholic anymore?”

     “No, He’s not making music anymore I think. He’s not a rockstar.”

     “You can still be a rockstar and not make music.”

     Cole twisted his wedding ring, still muttering the occasional direction to Nigel.

     “Well you can be a rockstar and not be an alcoholic.” Vinnie said, then leaned forward to see past Richard. Jareth’s glazed eyes were stuck on his own reflection in the window. “Jareth dear, are you an alcoholic?”

     “... What?” He muttered, looking down to Vinnie’s knees.

     “You’re not an alcoholic.” Vinnie said.

     “Ehm… Right.”

     “So there you have it, not all rock stars are alcoholics.”

     “Never said they were.” Richard mumbled.

     “M’ not a rockstar.” Jareth said, his earrings jingling as he gently shook his head.

     “Jareth, you’re a rockstar.” Cole interjected, turning to look at him. “And she’s certainly right- not all rock stars drink. Certainly not you.”

     “He.” Jareth muttered.

     “Pardon?”

     “He.”

     “Ah- right…”

     Cole cleared his throat, and sat straight again.

     Jareth’s face was unfortunate enough to draw crowds, thus Cole had the privilege of reserving an entire restaurant when he wished to dine. Upon arrival,
the lads shed their coats and stripped off their gloves.

     Cole pulled Jareth's chair out for him, briefly placing his hands on Jareth’s shoulders. His gloves sunk into the fur of the mink coat Jareth had yet to take off.

     “You alright?” He asked, to which Jareth nodded. “Going to order anything, are you?”

    “Ehm..” Jareth blinked and glanced at the menu sitting on the table. “I feel that ehm, well I dont know really.”

     “So, no?”

     “I dont know.”

     “Right- well you should order something. What have you had today? Besides that cup of grapes this morning.”

     Jareth reached up and briefly scratched his jaw. No answer.

     As Cole sat, he splayed his napkin over his thigh, then sniffed as he picked up his menu. They had been here only once before, and it was two tours ago. He may have ordered their Alfredo dish, but he couldn't quite remember if that was the Canterburry or another restaurant.

     Warmth soaked through Cole’s work slacks as Nigel’s hand found his knee. His leg twitched away, his heart jumping at the unexpected touch.

     “Oh!- for god's sake,” He scolded, smacking Nigel’s wrist with his menu.

     “Careful.” Nigel chuckled, placing the same hand on the back of Cole’s chair to lean in while he spoke. “You’ve been messing with your ring, bit distracting
innit?”

     “What?” Cole looked down to his own left hand.

     “Just now you were twisting at it again.”

     “Ah, right. Poor habit I suppose… I’d best be getting rid of it now.”

     “Well hold on, who’s to say she isn't toying with you?”

     “Toying with me?”

     “Bit cruel, innit?”

     “I don't think she is, really.” Cole chuckled, shaking his head slightly. “Not about this.”

     “No?... You sound rather done with her as well then, mm?”

     “Hah, but not enough for separation, for god sakes.”

     “Oh right, can’t be a single man at your age, can ya.”

     “People aren't meant to get divorced.” Cole firmly stated, opening his menu once more. His heart dropped slightly though, and he looked to Nigel. “Not to say it’s not right for an older man to be looking for a woman. Right, I say it’s rather good that you’ll be able to support a new woman, Nigel.”

     Nigel was a divorced man, or never married. Cole didn't know which.

     Nigel grinned, his eye twinkling. Cole could smell the cigarette on his breath as Nigel refused to say anything further, as though waiting for Cole to notice
something. The nervousness made Cole’s mustache curl just slightly into a smile.

     “Whatever are you smiling at?”

     “You’re an absolute delight Cole.” Nigel said, a slight tease barely present in his tone.

     “Don’t say such a thing.” Cole replied, then cleared his throat.

     He adjusted the napkin on his thigh, then went to toy with his ring again. He hesitated and instead placed his hands on his lap.

     “You lads talking about Ruby?” Richard chimed in from across the table.

      Oh great.

      “No.” Cole replied shortly.

     “You and the hag finally cutting the knot?” He asked.

     “Don't call her that.” Vinnie muttered next to him, placing his menu down.

     “Well, I feel we ought to call her something- a witch maybe.”

     Cole’s brows furrowed slightly, and his feathers began to ruffle. He didn't hate Richard, but the fellow was a blubbering idiot at times.

     “Look,” Richard started leaning back in his chair to address the entire table. “All she does is pop into the studio, waggle ‘er finger at ya,” He pointed his
finger at Cole to demonstrate. “And say you’ve got a small prick.”

     Cole could feel the heat subtly pressing against his own face, and he mindlessly puffed his chest.

     “Now none of us are wanting to hear it any more, I think a divorce is a damn good business move.”

     “Yes, well it’s not that simple, is it.” Cole mumbled, reaching for his glass to sip the luke-warm water. “Pardon?” He asked, leaning back to catch the attention of a passing waitress. “Could we get these with ice?”

      “If you’d like.” She replied, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear while she approached. As she took Cole’s glass, her eyes darted once to Jareth.

      “For the whole table.” Cole repeated.

      “Right.”

      How embarrassing, getting a divorce. Couldn't Richard keep his mouth shut for this one dinner? He hadn't spoken a word to Cole all afternoon, he couldn't have kept up those spirits? For god sakes, Cole is his manager. Richard ought to behave more orderly with him.

     Perhaps that's where Jareth's reluctance was from tonight. Was he sad about a possible divorce? Perhaps he felt that his parents were once again splitting.

     How ridiculous for him to feel that way. Ruby barely addressed him, he
shouldn't feel upset over her leaving. Anyhow, both he and Cole were adults now, not children.

      Cole glanced at Jareth. He had slipped off his coat and hung it on the back of the chair, now only in his sweater and vest. His pale eyes watched the table mindlessly. He was not having dinner with them, he was off somewhere else.

     Nigel thought this was all funny, didn't he. Perhaps he saw marriage as a silly
thing, something for foolish men. Was he a ‘swinger’ of some kind? He could disappear at night while touring, Cole always suspected he was with women. Or perhaps he was a poof. No, not Nigel.

     Cole cleared his throat.

     Lastly, Cole didn't give a damn what Vinnie thought, she- he- wasn’t much of a colleague to Cole. More of an… employee.

     “What can I get started for you lads?” Asked a waiter.

---

      “Right, well that's everything then. Anything else for you? Cup of water?” Cole asked, his hands in his pockets.

     He stood lingering in Jareth’s disheveled room. Curtains and drapes hung from the ceiling, puppets such as clowns and critters were sprinkled throughout the room, and a taxidermy weasel was perched on top of his dresser. Too much to look at really, and too much to worry about. Surely, there was a colony of insects living between cracks and under fabrics.

     “Nothing at all.” Jareth murmured.

     “Right… Well,” Cole replied, “If you need anything, just call.”

     “Alright.”

     He glanced down to his watch, though he didn't really check the time. With that, he said his goodnight and slipped out of Jareth's room through the large doors that guarded it. He walked through the long hallway to the stairs, his shoes clicking on each cold step before making it to the bottom.

      Despite Cole’s small estate being out of Nigel’s way, Nigel had offered to drive him home. No, he practically insisted despite Cole’s attempts to be chivalrous and decline.

     It was a relief though, Cole rather disliked a silent drive home. Some nights he would stay in the guest room just beside Jareth’s room, despite the closet keeping a collection of puppets and a painting of a clown that hung above the bed.

     However, The silence at home was more frustrating than the puppets or the clown.

     Besides, Nigel was good company.

     Cole opened the car door and slipped back into the front, taking off his gloves to rub his soft hands together.

      “Ah, you kept the car warm.” He commented.

     “Oh yea, I was thinkin of turning off the heaters and openin the windows before you came back.” Nigel said, plucking the cigarette from his mouth to
offer it to Cole.

     Cole declined with a hand that said ‘no thank you.’

     “What do you think of Richard?” Cole asked, adjusting himself on the leather seat.

     “Oh dear, that can't be good.” Nigel chuckled. “Was it all that talk about Ruby tonight?”

     “Whatever are you talking about?”

     “You’re not very happy with Richard, it’s alright Cole, I know.”

     What a relief.

    “Honestly, how could a man be so daft? It’s certainly not on my hands that she happened to be so cruel with me in public. I have done what I can in correcting her-”

     “Correcting her?”

     “Don’t say it like that.” Cole groaned, reaching up to rub his face with his hands. “Of course I never hit her- I only mean to say that flaunting a man's less than ideal marriage is.. Well- it's ehm…”

     “Disrespectful.”

     “It’s disrespectful.”

     “And You still want to be with her?”

    No.

     “Of course I do, she’s my wife. She is my personal hell, but then what else would a wife be?” He said, looking to Nigel to search for a smile. Often, that
made men laugh. Nigel did not laugh. Cole cleared his throat.

     “You wanted to be with Ruby once.” Nigel said.

     “Certainly.” Cole replied shortly. “That’s just how it is. You must be in love, then out of love if you’re unlucky, and still married. People don’t get divorced when they’re in love.”

     “Ah, I believe that love never leaves you.”

     “...I disagree.”

     “I know.” Nigel chuckled. “You’re not in love with Ruby?.”

      Cole reached for his ring, beginning to twist it back and forth. Three times this way, three times that way. Nigel was getting at something, or wanting to get at something. Well, he was quite bad at being clear.

      Nigel may not understand, he was easy to love. He likely seemed quite charming to any single bird. He was quick witted, broad, well kept, and held a decent job. He would make a fine husband. A woman would have to be quite the disaster to leave him. He didn't understand how it was being a shorter, less attractive male.

     “And you?” Cole asked, “Have you been in love?”

     “Haha, certainly.” Nigel chuckled as he turned the steering wheel. “I’ve loved many.”

     Cole felt a slight twinge in his chest. How many? What did that mean? Lots of sex, or lots of divorces? Cole only hummed, and crossed his arms.

      “She was a beauty, that’s for sure.”

      “Ah, I see.” Cole muttered. “So, you still love her then? Even after you have left her?”

     “Bit pathetic innit? How we keep on lovin after so long.”

     “Right, well, if you were so in love then what could have possibly gone wrong?”

     Nigel didn't say anything for a while, and neither did Cole. It was only then that Cole wondered if the woman had died, and perhaps he was being rude.

     “We were in love, and somehow unhappy. Love involves so much unhappiness” Nigel said.

     “Ah… Certainly.”

     But Cole did not understand what Nigel meant to say. If you are in love, you are happy. If you are not in love, you are not happy.

     He felt warmth on his thigh, Nigel's hand. When alone like this, he allowed Nigel to place his hand on his knee, his back, or his thigh. It still made his heart
skip, he never was a very touchy person himself, but Nigel was friendly.

     Nigel’s thumb began to slide back and forth against the chilled fabric of Cole’s slacks. Cole could feel his body tense, his muscles stiffen, and his spine slowly straighten a bit. His stomach swirled, and he cleared his throat.

     But Nigel’s hand was only there briefly, giving Cole’s squishy thigh a short pat before it slipped away. The area that Nigel’s hand had been heating suddenly felt quite cold.

     Sometimes, when they were alone at night, Nigel became closer like this. Cole often found himself looking forward to the smoke-room conversations they would have after seeing Jareth off to bed. Nigel would say nice things to him, and touch his shoulder or his knee.

     The humming of the car died as Nigel took the key and shifted the stick to park.

     “Hah, there's no need for that Nigel, I can walk myself to the door.”

     “I know.” Nigel replied, opening the door.

     “Honestly…” Cole muttered to himself as he slipped his gloves back on. He watched Nigel’s dark figure pass in front of the car to open his door, offering his hand to help him out.

     Cole’s face heated, and his brows furrowed just slightly.

     “Take my hand Cole.” Nigel said, a grin in his voice.

     “Really, Nigel-”

     “Cole.”

     Nigel’s voice had lowered slightly, and Cole’s heart skipped. Obediently, he took Nigel's hand, getting pulled to stand.

     “That’s a good lad.” Nigel chuckled.

     Cole swallowed thickly, his brows raising slightly. A good lad?

     While passing the front gate that needed to be oiled, passing the lawn, and up the steps, Cole felt Nigel’s hand stay firm on his lower back. He was leading him in a sense, the two lacking words as their shoes clicked against the concrete. Cole could see his own breath fog from his nose, each cloud appearing quicker than Nigel’s far slower breathing.

     “Right then, that’ll be all.” Cole said, turning to say his goodbye to Nigel.

     Nigel stood a step lower than him on the stairs, making a slightly proud feeling flare in Cole’s chest. They were at the same height now, eye to eye.

     “That’ll be all.” Nigel agreed in a mutter. “Cole, you’re a hard worker, you are.” Nigel reached out, making Cole’s body tense as his fingers slipped around the back of Cole’s neck. “I admire you.”

     Poor Cole’s face burned. His heart fluttered with pure joy, and he couldn't help the slight smile that curled the edges of his mustache. Well, it was certainly nice to be admired by a man such as Nigel. A proper man, well kept and well dressed.

     Nigel’s hand pulled Cole in, encouraging him to lay his head on Nigel’s shoulder. Cole- though he resisted just slightly- let the side of his face rest against the taller man’s sleek suit. He let out a slow sigh through his nose and closed his eyes, letting Nigel's hand begin to slide through his hair.

     Nigel was petting him much like a cat, soothing him.

     Sometimes, late at night when they were in his office, Nigel would do this. He would pet Cole’s head and say kind things. Though Cole had once scolded him for the behavior, it became a friendly gesture they would occasionally share.

     It was private. Just two men enjoying company together, nothing more. It was something no one would know about, and something that only went on after work hours.

     “You admire me?” Cole asked, his voice now far more gentle.

     “Certainly,” Nigel replied. “I'd sooner say you’re the hardest worker I’ve met.”

     Cole smiled. He could smell cigarette and cologne on Nigel’s neck, he could feel him breathe.

     Cole felt Nigel begin to shift, pulling away from the friendly hug. Cole backed as well, yet, Nigel leaned in again, keeping his hand on the back of
Cole’s neck. Cole did not move.

     In the midst of confusion and a lack of recent affection, Cole closed his eyes. Warm lips pressed against his own, molding together. Nigel’s lips were slightly
chapped from the cold, and his thick mustache bristled up against Cole’s.

     Nigel leaned back, their lips making a subtle peck sound, then he tilted his head the other way and leaned in again.

     They were both men.

     Before Nigel could molest Cole again, Cole awoke and let his arms move with pure instinct. He shoved Nigel, taking a sharp step back to rip them apart.

     Cole stared at Nigel, and Nigel at Cole.

     “Cole-” Nigel started.

     “Get away from me.” Cole scolded. “You’re confused, Nigel.”

     “I know what I want.”

     “No, you don't. You are not a faggot.”

     “I think you’re confused Cole.” Nigel shot back.

     “Get away from my house.”

     Cole cleared his throat, and reached for his ring to twist it. His brows stayed furrowed despite the fear in his eyes. He did not look at Nigel, rather, he looked to Nigel’s shoulder.

    “Goodnight, Cole.” Nigel finally said, slipping his hands into his pockets before turning to leave.