Custom Van Contest 2025 Announcement
Added 2025-01-30 13:00:10 +0000 UTC
Hey, do you ever feel like you were born in a time of vast potential only to come of age right as all the doors start slamming shut? That’s exactly what it feels like to get in a stranger’s bitchin’ custom van!
IT’S THE 2025 HOT DOG CUSTOM VAN CONTEST!
Things are getting bad out there. But you have options! You can go to therapy. You can join an activist movement. You can watch the news on mute at the gym and try to outrun an existential breakdown. Or you can look at this fucking sweet-ass custom van.
This van has everything: A badass wizard fighting fish monsters, a bumper designed to shred dogs, a TV, a loveseat, orange shag carpeting, velvet seats with built-in arm restraints, a disco tub just large enough to drown a woman in, an undrowned woman, everything a vanmaster dreams of!
If you need more inspiration, just look at our previous year’s van contests:
2022 Hot Dog Custom Van Contest: Gratuitous Van Service! Custom Van-Off and Panty Eating Contest
2023 Hot Dog Custom Van Contest: An Unlubricated Van Job! Custom Van-Off and Herpe Contest
2024 Hot Dog Custom Van Contest: Pull Over & Put It In! Custom Van-Off and Mustache Ride Contest
There’s some amazing art in there, some even more amazing crimes, and a whole lotta love that is never coming out of that shag carpeting. If you’ve had enough of the speedrun of western democracy, allow yourself some self-care and design your own bitchin’ custom van! Just fill out this form below, decorate your van to best express your innermost self or lure a specific type of drifter, and send it to us!
But wait! There’s more! That’s only the beginner’s competition. In every previous year of the Hot Dog Custom Van Contest, some lunatic has gone way overboard and built an actual, physical van to submit. There’s nothing we want to reward more than lunacy, so this year we’re announcing a second contest! It’s called…
“Oh, I know how to do that,” you’re saying, “me and the kids just find a weaker man with a sweeter van!”
No! That may be the unspoken rule of van succession, but we’re talking about a cute modelling competition. Just like all the best franchises when they run out of ideas, we’re going 3-D!
If you have a knack for crafts, a suspicious amount of free time, and an even more suspicious love of vanning, just click here to download the custom van model templates!
Fill out the text portions of the normal contest form as usual, then send us pictures of your bitchin’ custom van models. The winner of the 2-D contest will receive the praise and admiration of their peers. Which is worth NOTHING. The winner of the 3-D contest will win an actual, physical prize of incalculable* value!
No matter which contest you enter, just send your efforts to us at 1900HOTDOG@GMAIL.COM by 12AM PST on Sunday, 2/9/25 with the subject line: “VAN PARTY!” Winners will be announced on Thursday, 2/13/25, right here on your favorite hot dog themed van website.
This custom van contest is dedicated to the memory of David Lynch.
*Incalculable does not imply positive.
You can read this article and every other one on the much better in every way 1900HOTDOG.COM
Comments
J H n Am a mako
Joanne C Angle
2025-02-01 22:19:38 +0000 UTCI’m B Smsmmdmdmd mammal
Joanne C Angle
2025-02-01 22:19:25 +0000 UTCI came here to say "you gotta put xyz on a shirt" (and I will) but then you put that on me! May my van live long enough to get this done! If you ever hear "that 18yr old is too old" it better be about a goddamn car, I don't accept it coming from Yoda either.
SimpleStench
2025-02-01 19:20:06 +0000 UTCWas worried my submission was too dark and then I remembered the site I was on
Professor Rocketsurgeon
2025-01-31 19:13:51 +0000 UTCSo it comes to pass that another Van must come slowly driving from the depths of foggy imagination and wheel themselves onto a stage for judgement. I feel prepared but how prepared can we ever really be for greatness? Vans are like poetry written by our souls. As we drive them, they drive us to greater things. I cannot fear, only move forward and hope there's a good sound system with enough gas to get us home.
LyraV
2025-01-31 18:43:09 +0000 UTCFirst thought on checking this out: This looks dumb as hell, I'm gonna give it a shot.
Swift Justice
2025-01-31 04:15:41 +0000 UTCMy van will have a first aid kit, can food, bottle water, all kind of tools and weapons. This way I can make my way across the hellscape that the U.S will be next week as I look for anywhere that will take in survivors, that isn't a cult or cannibals
drake godzilla
2025-01-30 21:16:48 +0000 UTCwell maybe but if it isnt worth nothing then how come it hurts my stomach so bad if i have to go more than a couple a hours without it
sissyneck
2025-01-30 18:01:25 +0000 UTCI can't wait to get crabs from all the sweet vans that'll be posted!
DustysRadTitle
2025-01-30 13:56:41 +0000 UTCHappy Van-mas, everyone!
Jeff Orasky
2025-01-30 13:50:37 +0000 UTCThe hardest part for me is always trying to figure out how far I can push whatever absurd/subversive concept I come up with while still having it be something I can accomplish in ten days' free time. My imagination likes to squander valuable brainstorming time reaching for ideas I can't feasibly pull off.
Skebotron
2025-01-30 13:40:20 +0000 UTCEvery year I say I'm gonna do this, but I forget. This year, I might not.
Pee-Wee's Uncle
2025-01-30 13:21:47 +0000 UTC
