Punching Day: Unshattered Love - The Novelization of Shatterhand ๐ญ
Added 2021-03-16 12:00:03 +0000 UTC
In 1991, Jaleco released a game on the Nintendo Entertainment System called Shatterhand. You controlled a man maybe known as Shatterhand who had to clear Areas A through E to blow up the future. Again, maybe. The game opened with someone harmlessly shooting Shatterhand and getting punched, ended with Shatterhand smiling in front of nothing but explosion, and there was no other exposition between those things. It's what storytelling scientists use to calibrate perfection. This is the story of the novelization of that story.
Comments
I'm looking forward to Kickmaster vs. Shatterhand
Andrew Caldwell
2021-10-07 00:43:53 +0000 UTC... this would be the perfect book for Zack Snyder to adapt in to a movie.
petertron
2021-03-18 13:01:39 +0000 UTCI for one look forward to the inevitable Punchmaster/Shatterhand teamup.
Curtiss
2021-03-17 19:08:55 +0000 UTCLong drives out here so I get a lot of audio book tape discs from the library and Bruce McGill is my second favorite narrator right after William Hurt reading Hearts from Atlantis he is so soft and tired when he reads its like i'm driving in the womb
sissyneck
2021-03-17 12:11:43 +0000 UTCFuck! Yes!!
Sebben
2021-03-17 08:25:31 +0000 UTC"Awesome" AU said.
AU
2021-03-17 05:37:35 +0000 UTCOprah was right for once. A fine addition. I cannot wait for a behind the scenes look into your forbidden love for Rhonda. Five Stars โญ๏ธ โญ๏ธ โญ๏ธ โญ๏ธ โญ๏ธ
Christopher Horne
2021-03-17 04:52:06 +0000 UTCCan a single cyborg punch a man's dick in two thousand and thirty separate dimensions simultaneously? We now know the answer. WE WILL NEVER NOT KNOW.
Mister Sinistar
2021-03-17 03:22:43 +0000 UTCDick punching enthusiasts the HOTDOG universe over were greatly relieved that Rhonda's communications did not suggest punching UP the first draft.
Kevin Hanlon
2021-03-16 19:50:46 +0000 UTCI wish I had half of the creative writing and comedy styles I have witnessed today. I feel so...Shattered.
Talking Alpaca
2021-03-16 19:42:02 +0000 UTCI must now squeegee my keyboard, monitor, desk and the wall beyond after experiencing such passion.
FancyShark
2021-03-16 18:30:56 +0000 UTCMake this available in print form and I will buy it. I know I'm not the only one.
Patrick Owens
2021-03-16 16:51:33 +0000 UTCHe cybernetically nodded. I love this game.
Fatamatician
2021-03-16 16:07:21 +0000 UTCMy forever Hotdoggers, You awesome sons of bitches created a website that made me feel feelings. Joy, fists, hilarity, more fists, admiration, and metal covered fists smashing dicks. That's it. Just those six feelings. With a love that even CYBORGAPE can't tear apparent, -Jeff
Jeff Orasky
2021-03-16 14:57:57 +0000 UTCThis article rocked me so hard, a CYBORGAPE appeared in my bathroom and dick-kicked me into the next county. I could ask for no finer death.
Chris โAceโ Hendrix
2021-03-16 12:52:07 +0000 UTCProject upload participants, shut it down. We can't do a better '90s cyborg post-apocalyptic dystopia novel than this one.
Brendan McGinley
2021-03-16 12:46:15 +0000 UTCThis was a work of beauty. Even the parts that gave me PTSD about fielding meaningless notes from people whose job is not to give notes. A man could not ask for a finer death.
Brendan McGinley
2021-03-16 12:45:13 +0000 UTC
