Witcher Contract: The Drunken Troll

Ciri wasn’t sure what she expected when she picked up her latest contract. Help us! We needs a Witcher to save us from an enormous troll that is destroying our village, the flier read. All seemed in a day's work for a young Witcher such as Ciri, yet this contract would turn out to be anything but your standard day of monster slayer.

After a few days of traveling, Ciri arrived at the village - which appeared to be perfectly ordinary by all accounts. A local smithy, baker, farmland and stables dotted the area. However it was only after she spoke with the locals did this contract take a turn towards the unusual.

There was a tale of two sides in the village, one split by the men and women of the village. When Ciri asked about the foul beast that was ‘destroying their village’ the men spoke of this big, lumbering troll that was intent on nothing more than destruction and violence.

“It came out of the woods one night, it did” The local blacksmith told Ciri. “We’ve heard rumbles and growls from  the forest, aye, but it stayed beyond our homes. We knew not to enter the forest - especially at night. But it was seven or six nights ago that this huge monster came out of the forest and destroyed our grain room- we have nothing left now!”

Although the violence could be easily heard in the men's voices, the woman of the village spoke with far softer tones! Before Ciri could even ask her first question, the Elderman’s wife confessed to all.

“Please don’t kill Boris! He doesn’t mean any harm, we swear!” The night grew long as the Elderman’s wife told the Witcher of the deal the woman had with this, apparently, well-endowed monster. “We first found him a few months ago at the start of Spring. Margaret and I first saw him peeking through the bushes as we bathed one morning. At first we were frightened - that our time was up and this foul beast would kill us all. Then we noticed…well, that he was aroused. I know that talk of such things is wrong and disgusting but…”

Ciri leaned in closer, the woman’s confession stirring something up in the young Witcher.

“We could not resist it” she continued, after making sure her husband wasn’t around to hear. “We were surprised at how quick it took to us. Sure, every other girl in a village has had at least one experience with a horse, but nothing quite like a troll. The power, the force, the sheer size of it all! And it wasn’t just me and Margeret but all of the women here.”

The young Witcher found herself more enthralled with every passing word. I’m going to have to find this well-endowed Troll and see for myself if he’s all cracked up to be. But before Ciri could begin her hunt, there was more to tell - much to Ciri’s annoyance.

“Our husbands had no idea. How could we tell that when they come home from a hard day in the mill or on the fields, we’ve all been fucked by a troll? It would break their hearts, and worst, they would go and kill or chase away our pet. I think Boris took a liking to the beer as after he got a taste of it he wanted more and more in return for our entertainment. Then one night he went berserk and destroyed Pavel’s stables. That was when my husband put out a contract that brought you here.”

Ciri had heard enough, she knew that this troll, Boris, could need to be dealt with…just in a way that would not be found in one of Vesimir’s dusty old books.

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