A Growing Concern (Short story with pictures)

A Growing Concern

Written by SteeleBlazer

Texas Femuscle Outbreak Grows to 669 Cases, Mostly in Single Adult Women 
By Buck Smallwood, The Lone Star Tribune

Ripped from today’s headlines—women across Texas are bulking up—big time, as another case of Spontaneous Feminine Hypertrophic Muscular Mass Induction has been confirmed. Or, if that’s rather a mouthful—just like the newly engorged biceps are more than a handful—I’ll put it succinctly: female muscle growth, or FMG as it’s being coined now in the popular nomenclature, has occurred. 

This isn’t just breaking news—it’s breaking stereotypes. In what many would still consider the “fairer” and “weaker” sex, something unexpected has taken root. And no, these delicate flowers aren’t just blooming—they’re growing thicker, tougher, and stronger, like mighty oaks. 

And for those of you who don’t quite understand what I’m talking about—let me again put it much more succinctly: 
I’m talking about women becoming stronger than men. 
It sounds unbelievable, but at 669 cases and growing—you better believe it! 

And I know many of the men out there—you don’t think it’s fair that the fairer sex is now stronger. 

But the facts are the facts—and somehow, these girls are getting jacked. With Mighty Female Muscles! (Capitalized, of course, because that’s just how big and mighty—no, make that Mighty these women are!) 

This latest case shows the outbreak is just as strong as ever, with no signs of the growth slowing or weakening. If anything, the cases are accelerating, and the women? They’re getting even bigger—and of course stronger. But this is Texas—we're used to things being bigger. Bigger hats, bigger belt buckles, bigger trucks, and now… bigger women. So as it turns out, things really are bigger in Texas... 

Just not the men. 

Still, there are reports—and growing hysteria—along with the women growing hypertrophic muscular mass—that this might not be confined to the Lone Star State. There is a growing concern among the men that it could spread… to other women… and to other states. 

This epidemic—yes, an epidemic of strong women—is causing a full-blown panic, at least among men.

One local gym canceled its men’s powerlifting competition mid-event—after a woman from the yoga class next door casually deadlifted more than the entire male roster of competitors combined. Just one woman. One lift. More than a dozen of the strongest men in not just Texas, but the entire United States of America, out-lifted with ease.

And the rest of the yoga class? They may not have shattered records like their musclebound peer, but they still out-lifted the men in every single category. The men weren’t just outmuscled… they were outclassed. By a yoga class.

It was a tough day for male egos—and a brutal reality check for anyone who still thought yoga pants were just for stretching. And believe me, if you think I’m stretching the truth, I was able to corroborate the story. But all of the men involved wished to remain anonymous.

Unlike Mandy Smalls—who is anything but. She was the one woman who out-lifted the entirety of the men’s roster with a single lift. “I never even lifted weights before,” she said with a shrug. “And now I’m a powerlifting champ—or I would be, if the chumps didn’t take their balls and go home. This really was too easy!”

Leaving this reporter to wonder: if one woman can deadlift more than all those men, maybe men’s muscular supremacy is dead—and maybe a new muscle matriarchy is rising up and growing right before our eyes.

Some of the men grumbled that she had too much muscle—but in this reporter’s opinion, you can never have too much of a good thing, and they’re just being dumbbells, still thinking a man could compete against women and their Mighty Female Muscles!

Yes, this is certainly an epidemic—one in which all the leading scientists are baffled at the cause, and it’s not just the men panicking over fears of being outgrown and outmuscled by women. Women have their fears too.

It’s triggering a very different kind of crisis among them—not the fear of growing bigger, stronger muscles, but the frustration that comes with it. It’s causing a different kind of panic among women, as they are no longer as small and short as they used to be, and that’s causing a shortage in cute t-shirts, as women all over the Lone Star State complain that nothing fits them anymore. Yes, women are growing bigger and stronger, and they’re not complaining about their muscles or going from a slim, sweet lil’ piece of cheesecake to big, heaping, savory pieces of—or rather full slabs of—beefcake. While the men are talking about what strange malfunction of nature or perversion of science could be causing this, the women, it seems, are literally bursting at the seams—or rather, their clothes are—and they’re talking about nothing but wardrobe malfunctions. 

“Nothing fits me anymore, not even my boyfriend’s shirts,” one woman was quoted as saying. And to prove her point, she flexed her bicep through her boyfriend’s shirt and didn’t stop there as she flexed her quads through a pair of his jeans—now shredded like tissue paper. 

But this reporter remains skeptical. Personally, I think it’s just an excuse to splurge on a whole new wardrobe.

Then again, after looking at all these photos of the women afterward… those muscles of theirs don’t just shred and rip their clothes to pieces—they might be shredding my entire argument to pieces. 

Yes, women are unexpectedly gaining muscle—ripping sleeves, shredding jeans, and showing off biceps now bigger than their boyfriends’, and shoulders wider than our Lone Star State’s star linebackers, and of course, larger and harder muscles than any man. And I do mean any and every! These girls are so yoked, they make male bodybuilders look small—and they just think it’s swole… I think they meant swell, but I’m not about to argue with a swole and yoked woman! 

And if you think these women are shy about their strength, think again. When asked how they feel about having bigger muscles than their men, the response was nearly unanimous: 
They absolutely love it! 

“Being bigger than a man... It’s not just a flex. It’s the ultimate flex,” said Sue Armstrong, who’s now quite literally living up to her last name with a prodigious pair of python-thick arms. “And if men don’t like it, they can kiss my muscular butt,” she added. And more than a few women I’ve spoken to echo that sentiment—and I mean that not just figuratively, but literally. Though to go into that topic any deeper… well, it wouldn’t exactly be fit to print, despite how fit their figures are. 

Speaking of hindsight—those hindquarters of the newly engorged women are quite gorgeous. They really are quite the sight. You could say they’re gorgeously engorged with THICC muscles… but I’ll stop before my editor fires me! 

This whole outbreak of FMG in our state is helping highlight the growing divide between man and woman, showcasing just how differently each views what’s the more pressing matter. Men want to find out the cause and stop this, while women don’t seem to mind the change—not the change of clothes, mind you. As I said, their biggest gripe about their big muscles is their inability to find cute clothes, but they don’t seem to mind that they’re now wearing the literal and figurative pants in the relationship. 

Which is why they might not see finding a cause—or a cure—as all that pressing. After all, a lot of them seem to love bench pressing more than their boyfriends. 

Heck, I bet one woman can bench press more than an entire offensive or defensive line. And please—don’t be offended by this or get defensive about it. 

I’m just reporting the news. This isn’t yellow journalism—especially since the bodies of those Texas Titanesses are more bronzed than yellow! 

This is new ground that we all tread, and it’s ground that might shake beneath the thunderous, muscular thighs of the modern woman. And it just might lead to changes in modern dating, too. 

Because these modern muscular women give the term “picking up a guy” a whole new meaning—mostly the literal meaning, as they can easily pick up any would-be date, man, or boyfriend. 

Over one shoulder. Under one arm. Overhead. Take your pick. Or rather…The women will be the ones doing the picking now. 

This is truly becoming a growing concern for men across the country. And I do mean growing—because if this trend keeps up, we won’t just be looking at a role reversal… we’ll be staring up at it. 

But hey—on the bright side? 

The guys might be shrinking in size, strength, and swagger… 

But they can still look forward to— 

Snu snu.

And I, for one, look forward to reporting on all the breaking news about the broken hips, broken beds, and broken egos of men that the future has in store for us.

So stay tuned—and stay subscribed—for more breaking news...And hips!