PHOBOS KING OF BEASTS CH 41: The Moon Makes No Mistakes

"Where are you, Drahá? Please. Just a word, please." My male's delicate fingertips that brush over my cheekbone and his distressed pleading voice which beckons me with that unfathomable pain have my eyes snap open and my flesh lunge forward with a need to seize him before he leaves. To get a little a bit of his warmth before my being is once more encompassed by unmeltable ice. 

My limb is stretched forward in an attempt to grip his arm my chest heaving my blues frantically scanning the room as I pursue his heat with profound desperation. "Phobos." A faint whimper flees my lips that wobble unable to keep still as I place my palms over my eyes striving to contain my tears and my cries. I envelop my arms around myself and plunge back onto the bed to curl up into a tiny ball and weep. 

Phobos has endeavoured to reach me once more, it always shackles me whenever I am asleep for when my conscious has succumbed to darkness our marks unite to bring us back together and with its aid, he often attempts to communicate with me. I seldom hear and feel him but the aftereffects of it shatter my heart. I am certain my male believes his trials are of no use for never once did I answer him back but he never ceased straining himself wasting the entirety of his energy just so he could hear a sole word from me. With each time I listen and feel him, my mate's dread of losing me forever shines through for me to sense and it is a feeling I cannot endure. 

Over the past months, his desperation his fear has been difficult for me to neglect. He assumes I have been taken by one of his enemies and he strives each day to discover my location. As Cronus forewarned Phobos indeed brought hell to earth, he invaded the packs of several of his enemies and set fire to their lands. He slaughtered hundreds in cold blood and painted their grounds with their gore.  His fury grew when they had stated they did not have me with them, his beast devoured many till their bones and he tore apart anything that stood in his way of getting to me.

My male has uncountable enemies and he has been annihilating each one of them and I feel with every pack he mercilessly massacres he is getting a little closer to me. Cronus notified me that my male was often covered in bleeding wounds that barely healed but he would still get up the next day to attack another pack in his hopeless search for me. He is getting weaker more powerless with each passing day but I still have not made up my mind to return, I feel selfish and unhappy with myself for I know what he is undergoing. 

It is not as though I do not want to see him anymore, I do with every haunting breath I take. His sweet words, his gentle caresses and his comforting arms are all I yearn for. But the thought that I would have to return to our lands and confront my demons is something I am still not prepared for. We both hold an apology to give out to one another we both need to speak of our emotions and forever burn this heartache we have caused each other I know this but my greedy desires have been consuming me.

Italy has been good to me so far. I am merely a foreigner to them yet the wolves here with their warm welcoming embrace who opened their home to me is something that I do not wish to leave. I have been truly enjoying my time here it is not like a holiday of some sort but I feel loved and taken care of which reminds me of my own family. The elder females here are kind and look out for me making sure my health does not deteriorate and that I have everything I need which never fails to warm my heart.

Speaking of family, mama, papa and my friends have not been doing well. The fact that I am nowhere to be found is killing them and at one point they forced Cronus to take part in Phobos's hunt for me. My male and he are working together and my bother most of the time acts as though he has not got a single clue of my location, he is protecting me putting everything at stake for my sake. The last time I spoke to him he told me not to think about anything else but the well being of my pup and me. He said he would come to pick me up in a heartbeat when and if I am certain of my wish to return home to Phobos. Until then he will continue to put his life on the line. 

My male is no ordinary wolf if he came to learn somehow that I am here out of my own will and Cronus and Lumina assisted me to flee his arms he will render out equal punishments he sees fit for it is betrayal. I am unsure if they both being a part of his family will stop him. My selfishness is putting many that I care about at risk but each time I pick up the phone to call Cronus and tell him I am willing to return my being freezes rooting me to my spot and a sense of queasiness fills me. It is an endless futile war I am fighting within to confirm my decision with myself. Do I stay or do I return home? 

The only thing that was stopping me and still continues to do so is her. Moira. 

I pity that female in a way, if she had desired Phobos I would have allowed my wolf to take control of my flesh and perhaps would have slain her right there in that tent. But when she gazed up at him with those bleary broken eyes I knew it was her male she was seeking for not mine. Yet getting drunk and often kissing a mated male that to her Alpha is shameful no matter what and considering her traditional upbringing it should have brought out a severe sentence for her. But my male's friendship with her is so strong that he was willing to freely give himself to comfort her. Their kiss still plagues my dreams and that is the prime reason for my wavering. 

I called her actions shameful. I am such a hypocrite. Did I not do the same with Karel? I deliberately kissed him very well knowing that Phobos would unhesitantly take his life. But I received my punishment from my male for it and as Lumina mentioned my male is also undergoing his own punishment. Losing me. Only Moira is left out of us three and when I return I will make sure to inform her of her wrongdoings with Phobos when she gets drunk that pushed me to leave in the first place and I will discipline her as Luna. I have set my mind for it and if my mate stops me he will bleed before I get to her. 

I had loved Phobos since I was five. He was the only male I had eyes for from blooming friendship to a fiery crush and finally to a beautiful mate bond. I had given my everything to him gave up everything for him and he knew that he was the only male who held that power to make me melt within his scorching arms. He knew that I would not understand his obligation to comfort Moira in her times of need and grief and that is why he hid it from me I suppose. But to me it was a straight bloody slice through the immense trust I held for him. 

On our lands, if he sought pleasure from one of the breeders no one would question him, if he slept with another female no one would curse him. His word is law but he never once looked at another female with ample craving like he looked at me. And he never did look at Moira that way either but she holds a piece of his heart due to the past he shares with her. I do not know if it is gratefulness for saving his life, if it is a sense of duty that confines him or if he actually holds a soft spot for her. The thought of it sickens me and I have had enough of nausea for the past months. 

When he fucked me in that tent afterwards and unleashed his true wrath, his despair and jealousy upon my flesh and as I wept to the tear in my heart all I could think of was how despite it all I loved him body, mind, heart and soul. To me, he had always been the handsome juvenile whom I treasured and blindly chased after for a very long time but at that moment I could not figure out who I was to him. I questioned his love for me that maybe all along he had seen me merely as a possession as an object that belonged to him. And when he looked into my eyes he knew. He knew the consequences of his actions that would befall, he knew I would never forgive him for what he did with Moira be it duty or not. 

Even if I did not leave him, I would have put up an impenetrable barrier between us that would have taken him a long time to break through. I would have shunned his existence and would have proceeded to do so even if he had pleaded with me and had continually sought after my forgiveness. If Phobos was a male I met by fate and did not know much about I would not have held him accountable for his actions. But because of the childhood we shared because of those beautiful unerasable memories rooted deep within my mind and that feeling of slowly falling for someone he wielded that sword that I swore that I would never give to another wolf to pierce it straight into my heart. 

When I told him I despised him though I did not mean it, I too punctured my own sword that he gladly gave me out of love for the second time into him to end him once and for all. My first stab was when I had kissed Karel out of retribution. We both had severely wounded each other, we both had our pride that we did not wish to lay down for even a second. And look at what it has cost us. He cannot see the blossoming of his male and I cannot have my moon blessed with me through my pregnancy.

When I wanted a pup with him all I could imagine was those nine months of pure bliss I would have with my male. That raw unfiltered happiness as we watched our pup grow in my womb demanding more space for slumber. That first kick of his tiny foot as we both felt him demanding attention from us was what I could think of. My pregnancy cravings would make Phobos rush out of bed in the middle of the night to bring me what I wept for and he would read our male stories with that gruff yet soothing voice of his. And I would sleep happily in his arms knowing my pup and I will be safe, loved and well provided for.

Dreams are a cruel thing indeed for everything I dreamt of came true. Except it has me breaking apart for the love of my life is not with me to witness everything. 

Not wanting to give myself any more suffering not wanting to carry the burden of my thoughts on my shoulders for the day I rise with a feeble grunt. Tossing my legs over the bed setting my feet upon the carpet I place my palms beneath my heavily swollen belly and waddle down the stairs taking one step at a time.

My palm squeezes onto the rail and I smile at the thought of what Phobos would have done this instant. He would carry me down despite my demure protests and would bare his teeth at me asking me to submit to his care. It is true I have missed him so much each month of my pregnancy, the first few months were the most arduous to go through without him by my side. My hormones did not help me either it rather fueled my need to have him beside me. Sometimes I thought I could call him and say I am doing all right and that we will be having a male soon. I wanted to ask if he could give me some more time but knowing Phobos I knew that might as well be a dream of mine for that would have never happened. He would have come as fast as lightning strikes the earth each time a storm is birthed.

He would have never given me space after that he would have caged me close to him at all times and would have never let me out of his sight. It would have put a strain on our relationship even more and I did not want that whatsoever. 

The sounds of faint whimpers and whines startle me drawing me out from my thoughts and I scurry as fast as I can towards the living room. Luna Ira is often busy attending to the females of the pack and Alpha Giovanni is also frequently occupied with his duties which leaves his five-year-old sister Gianna by herself most of the time. She loves sprinting around the house and often trips and tumbles everywhere. And at times I noticed she was doing so on purpose to gather the attention of her brother who hardly has time to spend with her. 

Being with Gianna is always entertaining, she loves to talk and share with me her thoughts on certain things. She is smart, fierce and speaks her mind. Even when her brother raises his voice at certain times her she does not cower but faces him head on her blazing eyes plunging into his. It surprises me how she is and if she were to train back in my pack among the rest she would surely become one of Phobos's top warriors. But on Giovanni's lands, the females are not allowed to train or fight their duties are more feminine. Everything I was taught to be by my mother. 

Peering into the living room my eyes search for Gianna scouring the ground attempting to find her crying somewhere. Yet what I do encounter instead is in the corner of the room are Ira and Alpha Giovanni seated upon the couch their backs turned towards me. His palms roughly squeeze and knead her ass cheeks as she straddles him the nape of her neck is flushed as a shade of deep red covers it whilst his face is sunk into her stripped bosom. 

The wet sensual sounds of kissing and sucking have my cheeks redden with intensity. "Gio." Ira mewls out her back arching as she shoves her breasts more toward his devouring mouth. Newly mated wolves are always initially passionate but doing this out in the open is quite....well who am I to question this Phobos and I were the same. Wishing to give them the privacy they need I prepare to leave but halt in my tracks as my eyes find Gianna keenly observing them with narrowed questioning eyes peeking through the glass doors that leads to the garden. She looks utterly confused. 

My eyes widen as the rhythms of my heart quicken, this is not an appropriate sight for a five-year-old to witness! Though she cannot see much except for their sides she moves around trying to get a better view, that pup's curiosity reminds me so much of myself. Sensing my eyes on her flesh she turns to me and smiles brightly waving her hands at me. "Gianna. Come here." I speak soundless words as to not interrupt the couple whilst she carefully reads my mouth. Understanding what I said she folds her tiny hands across her chest and pouts turning her face away from me. She is upset that she is left alone once more. 

"Enough Gio, we must stop now. We have duties to attend to." Ira's pleading voice garners my attention but I do not look at them keeping my reprimanding eyes on the naughty adamant pup.

"It is still early in the morning. Let me taste your cunt, Ira." Alpha Giovanni rasps out dripping with heavy arousal and I detect an eager squeal followed by moans of pleasure. Oh goddess, how do I get to Gianna without revealing myself to them? This situation is so uncomfortable, I do not do well with such things. Though I am convinced Alpha Giovanni would not mind if I interfered but Ira would be humiliated by my presence I do not want her to feel that way.

 When I take a fleeting cautious peek at them I find that his shirt is off baring his tattooed muscled back that flexes to each of his movements with his jeans that cling loosely around his hips, Ira's legs are seated on his shoulders with his mouth sunk into her pussy as her fingers grip onto his hair. I once more scrutinise Gianna who looks even more confused at their antics. 

I bare my teeth in warning at her and she playfully pokes her tongue out at me prancing around like a wild hare mocking me. Having had enough of this I stride out through the back entrance doing my best to step faster despite my heavy belly. I understand their need to be close to each other but they should know how inquisitive and mischievous Gianna is. But Ira has complained to me many times that the little pup barely gives them time to be alone with one another so I also understand it is not easy. 

Once reaching the garden I whisper out harshly to the little one keeping my voice low as to not disturb the mates consumed by passion on the other side of the glass doors. "If you do not come with me this instant, I will not play with you anymore." She jerks at my words and turns her startled gaze towards me. 

She flashes her growing teeth at me and I stifle a chuckle as a furious growl booms out her small chest and I gasp for it has been caught by Alpha Giovanni's sharp ears. He instantly rises from between Ira's legs and his striking eyes collide with my broadened ones. I feel like a deer caught in headlights as my cheeks flush wildly to his bewildered frown. Well, this is quite awkward. He unhurriedly rakes his eyes down my being and discovers Gianna hiding behind my back her tiny palm clutching onto the material of my skirt seeking protection from her brother's wrath. 

She takes a timid peek at him from behind me and he immediately bares his canines at her in criticising for he knows now the actuality of the situation. He knows she was secretly watching them and that I had come here to take her away. He closes his eyes with an exhausted look upon his face as though he is fed up with his little sister, she is hard to manage. He once more meets my eyes and slightly tips his head as a sign of appreciation.

"Is he coming? Am I in trouble?" Gianna whimpers from behind me. 

Ira stiffens in her spot beneath her male eyeing him glimpse out to the garden where Gianna and I stand, she begins to shift in a way that would assist her to turn around and encounter us but her mate prevents her from doing so. He captures her jaw in a fierce grip bends down and thrusts his tongue into her mouth. And that is my cue to leave. He wants more time with his female, he is not willing to give up on the opportunity just to scold his sister. I completely understand. I think Gianna is what juveniles would call a cock blocker to her brother. 

Grabbing her wrist I steer her away from the garden and up towards her pink bedroom. She soundlessly follows me without another protest for she knows in a few minutes she will earn a good scolding from her brother. Her pink lips are jutted out in an upset pout as I shut the door behind us. Unable to stand anymore my sore swollen heels giving me pain I sit down upon the chair next to her bed that has numerous dolls of all types and colours scattered upon the rumpled sheets. Though she is naughty her brother spoils her a lot there is nothing that she does not possess. 

"What was Gio doing with Ira?" She asks me with interest as I stiffen in my seat and snap my gaze at her. What do I even say at this point, she is a pup she will believe anything I state.

Taking a few seconds to come up with something plausible I answer her. "They were...wrestling."

"Wrestling? I have never seen such type of wrestling before." She says with alert eyes. Smart female.

"It is a type only adults can do."

"Really? Then can I do it when I grow up? It seemed fun and Ira enjoyed it." Goddess help me. If Phobos was here I would be met with one of those filthy teasing smirks of his and he would have definitely replied to her in a dirty way just to get a reaction out of me. 

"Maybe but only with your mate. This type of wrestling can be done only with your male." I utter. She will learn about all this when she becomes a juvenile, they will teach her in school but I heard from Ira that Alpha Giovanni has an appointed female who homeschools her. So maybe she will get that talk from him. Goodness, I hope she will survive that when the time comes I cannot imagine getting a sex talk from Cronus. 

"Okay." She sighs her lips dipped downward showing to me her upsetness. 

"What is it?"

"Gio won't spend time with me anymore. He is either working or he is with Ira. I think he does not want me here. I feel like I am an extra weight for him to carry." There is an audible hitch to my breath at her words. How can a pup speak this way, she is only five? 

"Come here Gia," I whisper softly patting my lap whilst parting my legs for her. She crawls towards me and stands up raising her arms as I set my palms under her arms and lift her up. Once she is settled on my right thigh she snuggles into me pressing her nose into my hair inhaling my scent. 

Lumina had briefed me all about Gianna on how her parents had died when she was barely a few months old and how she has grown up without receiving motherly love. Her brother Alpha Giovanni tried his best to raise her but as she matures she seeks a certain type of warmth that only a mother can provide her with. 

"You know your brother loves you." 

"No, I am his responsibility. A few other pups had told me I am his burden." My hold on her tightens as I gaze down at her lovingly. She is wrong, so very wrong about him. Her brother puts her first in many ways but she is too young to see and to understand it. 

"Gia, no. How could you ever think that way? He is your family and yes he might be strict with you but only because he loves you and wants to protect you."

"No he doesn't and I have decided to leave when I turn sixteen. I will go somewhere else to a place where my brother will be free of me." 

"Do not say that! You are all your brother has." Is this what happens when a pup grows up without parents? Her brother is an Alpha his pack comes first but I do not know if he is aware of his sister's emotions and of such thoughts that should not exhaust a little one's mind. 

"He has Ira. He does not need me. You see how I try to get his attention. I am not allowed to play with the other pups but he won't play with me either. Until last year he would read me a bedtime story every night but after he brought Ira home he never comes to find me." 

"Gianna, Ira is his m-"

"His mate, I know." She smiles up at me and my heart aches for her. "At the school, there was this art competition that I took part in a-and I won. Do you want to see my medal?" 

"Of course. Go bring it, I would love to see it." She leaps out of my lap and rushes towards one of the drawers. She pulls it open and rummages through it plucking out a small golden trophy that glimmers in the sunlight pooling in through the open window. She runs back to me and lifts it for me to see her chest puffing up with pride in her achievement. 

I seize it from her hand and gently skim the pad of my thumb over the engraved words. "Gianna. First Prize." I read it out aloud and beam down at her. "Well done, you brother must have been proud of you."

Her smile disappears from her face as soon as I utter them and she gazes down at her feet clad in pink ballet flats and white socks with frills. "I got this two weeks ago. I have been trying to tell Gio but he never cares. He said he was busy and would talk to me another time but he never did."

"How about we tell him today, then?" I ask with an encouraging smile. 

"No. I do not want to anymore. I have many trophies like them that I have never shown him before. I do not need his admiration. And Theia?" 

"Yes, Gianna."

"Can I ask you a favour?"

"Of course."

"Though I am not allowed to go to school the teacher always welcomes me to take part in her classes. I have a lot of fun with her. And there is this presentation where I have to bring a member of my family and talk about them. I know the others will be bringing their parents and since I do not have any, c-can you come with me?"

I am taken aback by her request but keep my facial expression the same not wanting to scare her away. But with those doe eyes staring up at me with tremendous hope how could I ever reject this female. "I would love to."

Tears brim in her eyes and she rubs them with tiny fists not wanting to cry. "This is the first time someone has agreed to my wishes." 

Before I could answer her the door to the bedroom is shoved open to reveal an agitated Alpha Giovanni who has his tense eyes fixed upon his little sister. I see he has been overhearing our conversation he heard everything she told me. Gianna visibly stiffens in front of me knowing just who it is behind her and gradually turns to meet him. 

"I am sorry." She says in a monotone voice as though it is an instinct as though it is the only actual conversation she has with her brother. She is apologizing knowing he is here to scold her for spying on him.

He paces towards the open drawer and draws out her clothes throwing them all to the timber floor and I stand up not liking where this is going. His eyes take in all the medals she has won that shows her accomplishments and outstanding skills. His chest heaves as he strains to control his rage and he turns to her with irate eyes. She withdraws and takes a stumbling step backwards towards my heat. 

"Have you been leaving the damn house without my permission?" He strives to be calm but I see his protective nature taking control of him. He takes another forward and she takes one back gulping with nervousness afraid to face her brother. 

When he is met by stillness the loudness of his voice increases. "Must you be this stubborn? Must you be this disobedient, Gianna? I do not know how to handle you anymore." She shudders to his words and stares up at him with tear-filled hurt eyes.  

"Then give me away to someone else who might at least care for me." She spits her words at him sobbing feebly and dashes out of the room. 

"Gianna!" I call after her my voice high-pitched tone troubled. He presses his fingers into the corners of his eyes his fatigue overwhelming him.

"I will handle this, Theia. Gianna!" He summons her with a booming voice that echoes all around me. I pursue him calmly as he races after her down the stairs and blocks her path of escape with his large body. She needs to be quicker if she wishes to outrun her brother. 

She is weeping loudly each cry quaking her small shoulders and her brother sighs his eyes softening as he glimpses down at her. He squats before her and gently attempts to pry her fingers away from her eyes. But he is taken back by shock when she begins to strike him with her fists scratching at his face and endeavouring to force him away from her. 

"Gianna." His voice is much softer more guilty yet understanding. He wraps his arms around her body and forcibly tugs her to his chest but she battles his hold with every bit of strength she retains within her. 

"Ti odio, Gio. Ti odio così tanto. Perché? Perché non mi ami più?" She screams as Ira hurriedly enters the house through the glass doors her eyes enlarging when she sees the siblings at war. 

(I hate you, Gio. I hate you so much. Why? Why don't you love me anymore?)

"What are you saying, Gia? Stop it." He grunts out when her blows grow stronger and her wails more piercing. He seems to be in discomfort seeing her this way. 

"Ti odio." She bawls as he holds the back of her head and nudges her towards his neck. 

"You can hate me, I do not mind. But you must know I love you so very much." Gianna relaxes in his tight grip to his words but only slightly she is still wary of him. "You used to calm every time I held you like this when I had carried you around in my arms and it still works today." He chuckles. 

His sister does not reply to him but remains still as a signal for him to continue. "Bedtime stories? I thought you did not want them anymore. If it is what you wish for I will read you one every night for the rest of your life no matter how big you grow. You said you will leave when you are sixteen? You can leave but I will run after you wherever you go and bring you back home to me for you are the only family I possess. I cannot lose you too. I cannot live without you. You have misunderstood me in many ways but there seems to be no one to blame but me and I will work on my ways of treating you. And know this you are not my burden, you are my sister my family and I love you. Lastly, I did not know my little Gia was an overachiever. You have gotten so many trophies I am very proud of you."

She lightly compels him to shift rearward with her palms so she can meet his eyes. "Y-You are?"

"Of course, I am. I am sorry I have not spent much time with you as before but just bear with me for a little while longer until I have gotten more used to my current life, okay? It is quite tiring and very hard for me."

"Okay." She nods taking a step closer into his warmness clutching onto the collar of his shirt and he offers her a fond smile full of affection and love and also his eyes speak of his true feelings towards his little sister. 

 "You wish to go to school?"

"Yes." She shakes her head eagerly.

"Then you will."

"Really? I can go?"

"It is what you want and who am I to deny your wishes. But you can do so only on two conditions."

"What are they?"

"One we will go back to your room and you will tell me all about each of the medals you possess in your drawer. Two, I would like to come to the presentation thing at the school instead of Theia." 

She scowls as though she does not comprehend his words. "Why?"

"Because I want to. Because I am your brother. Or do you not wish for it?"

"No. No. I do. I do wish for it." She screeches with excitement and binds her arms around his neck as he lifts her up and sets her on his hip grinning down at her. She then ultimately notices Ira standing by the glass doors and waves at her. "Hello, Ira. I saw how much fun you had wrestling with Gio today."

Both Alpha Giovanni and Ira stare down at her with perplexed looks but then he turns toward me with a raised eyebrow and I give him an awkward smile. He then diverts his attention to his female with a teasing smirk. "Of course, Ira here undoubtedly loves wrestling."

"Oh goddess, tell me she did not see us." Ira conceals her red face with her quivering palms unable to hide her embarrassment.

"She did and so did Theia." He chortles earning an indignant glare from his female. He playfully strolls towards her and she flashes her teeth angrily at him. "Gianna. Chiudi le orecchie."

(Close your ears)

The pup closes her ears with her palms obediently and he leans down to grip Ira's waist with his right limb and yanks her to him earning a surprised gasp from her. He leans down and whispers something into her ear only to let her go with a nip to her throat and her cheeks fume even more. Head thrown back roaring laughter departs his chest at her reaction and with a nod of acknowledgement towards me he climbs up the stairs carrying an enthusiastic Gianna back to her room. 

Ira can barely meet my gaze, she is flushed all the way to the tip of her ears. "I-I apologize. He can be-"

"No need to apologize. I was once in the same position as you. Males are like that, you will get used to it in time." I do not wish for her to get even more mortified with the situation. 

Her eyes broaden to my words followed by a warm smile that paints her stunning freckled face. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For taking care of Gianna and for being...you." 

"Of course." I give her a small grin of friendly liking in return. 

"How is your male doing today?" She asks studying my belly. "Another four months to go for him to finally see the world."

"He is sleeping I suppose not a single kick I have felt from him today and yes I cannot wait until he is out of me. But I am also enjoying his presence inside me it is an indescribable feeling." I chuckle grazing my belly with my palm. 

"How about I fix you something for your feet, they look painful. I will make you some breakfast too your male must be upset for not feeding him yet. Wait here for me and we can spend some time together after."

"Thank you, I would like that." I deliver to her a thankful nod as she saunters into the hallway disappearing into the kitchen.

Plopping down upon the couch I lean my back against the feathery cushion humming lowly in appreciation from the base of my throat. This feels good, I would feel better if my feet and calves could get massaged. Phobos would have done that for me with no protest. Back home when we trying for a pup he obtained several of these ointments and stocked them into our cabinets. When I had asked him what they were he simply said they were for my soles and for other parts of my body, he had numerous conversations with the mated males and females of the pack with big families asking around for advice on how he could nurse me during my pregnancy. 

He even had these cute little texts hidden in his drawers that he imported from Deimos's lands on how to take care of the needs of a pup, how to change them, feed and dress them. Even as a juvenile he always had been a male who preferred educating himself through books it was what seized most of his attention whenever I had gone to play with him at the castle, his room was stacked with them and because of such diverse books, he grew smarter than any other with each passing day. 

Despite us living in a more uncivilized environment he was prepared to change a few aspects of that for me. He wanted to bring in diapers, get feeding bottles and even some expensive blankets that would keep our male warm. He wanted to do everything so that I would be comfortable so that our pup would be content. I remember how thrilled he was to have a male who would carry parts of both our souls. Yet he wanted our male to look and be more like me than him. He thought his darkness should not be imprinted onto our pup but rather my light. 

Thoughts of Phobos bring an unhappy smile to my face and I shake my head pushing his snapshots I keep treasured within my mind away. He is all I can think about day and night, it is getting harder to bridge this distance between us. 

Wanting to distract myself I scour through the pocket of my ankle-length floral skirt and pluck out the new silver-coloured cell phone that Cronus had thrust into my hand a few minutes before my departure to Italy. The only number it contains is his and no one else's, not even Lumina's was to be saved in the contacts. He had done this for my safety and also wanted to be a part of my male's growth. Cronus had already been an uncle when Kal was born but this is different, my male is his nephew by blood not by choice. 

It only takes two rings to be met by my brother's affectionate voice. "Hello, little wolf." He greets and I sense all the fondness he holds for me in his tone.

"Is this a good time?" I ask.

"Yes. I have just returned home."

"Really? Then may I ask what your final perspective of my pack is?"

"Strange." He replies without another thought and I giggle extending my legs farther getting into a more restful position upon the couch. My back and feet are truly killing me. "Have you eaten yet? I suppose it is morning in Italy."

"Yes it is and I haven't eaten. Ira is fetching me something." 

"That is nice of her. And how is my five-month-old nephew? Kicking you like a ball as always?" 

"He hasn't kicked me at all today and he is napping I can hear his snores," I reply with a smile tenderly patting my inflated belly. 

"That is good, I am happy that you can retain food in your stomach now. No more nausea, I was frightened you would get weaker." 

"I am all right, I am actually doing quite well. The food here, Cronus I do not even have words to describe it. It is so nutritious and scrumptious. I wish to kidnap the main cook and take her back to my pack."

"How is it that every time we speak you only talk about food?" He asks with a sonorous chuckle and I grin. But after a few seconds, the playful nature of our chitchat dissolves and eerie silence envelopes us as I stiffen to the tension I feel even though we are not in the same room. "So you have made up your mind? To return?"

I gulp anxiously and clutch on the phone tighter bringing it more closer to my lips. "I...still have not." Guilt swallows me whole and I clench my eyes shut unable to bear the war of my mind and heart.

"That is all right. I was merely asking. I suppose you wish to know...about him."

"Y-Yes. How is he doing well?" My worried yet curious question earns a deep sigh from my brother. 

"I really did not wish to tell you but I do not think it will be right of me to keep things from you."

"Tell me." I urge the beats of my heart quickening. 

"Your male is not doing well. Something is terribly...wrong with him, Theia. I cannot really pinpoint it but it is like I cannot see what he is thinking or what he is feeling. It is like he is made of ice that no heat can liquefy. And his eyes are so very void and...emotionless to the point that I could admit they disturb me and nothing ever disturbs me. Each month I detected different stages he was passing through at first he was fine and quite strong-willed I would say in his search for you but as the months passed something rose within him like ghostly darkness that he was able to mask well from his pack but not from me. Before I left and said my farewells it felt like he had lost something. Not you, but something he only recently gained. I could not speak to him much but we did have a late-night talk yesterday and with alcohol racing in his bloodstream, he did unveil a part of him to me."

"What did he say?" I weep clamping my palm over my mouth to suppress my gut-wrenching cries. 

"That he could not breathe well, that he felt as though his lungs had been blocked his throat clogged. His nights are plagued by nightmares of failing you. He blames himself for being reckless with you and slurred something about a tent? That he should stayed instead of leaving, I did not understand that part. He thinks that your mate bond has been unfair for you and he does not know if he should continue his search or let you go Theia. He said the farther you are from him there is a high chance you would truly attain happiness. Your male thinks...that the moon has made a mistake pairing you with him." 

I sob harder uncontrollable tears gush down my cheeks and I slump down to lay flat over the sofa. Ira comes out from the kitchen carrying a tray of steaming food and when she sees me her eyes show distinctly her unhappiness of beholding me this way.

"And what do you think of his judgment? Do you think the moon made a mistake?"

"Yes. He does not deserve me and I...do not deserve him. Our love is continually tested there is no prolonged peace between us. I cannot be who he wants me to be, who he needs and I am not the queen of beasts Cronus." I speak in between my wails and it takes some time for me to deliver my truth but Cronus is patient with me giving my emotions time. 

"I had once thought the same about another couple. That the moon had made a blunder pairing them together for she was everything I had longed for in a mate. I thought her male did not deserve her for he was putting her through hell. But I had been blind for over time did I finally understand the truth. That there were actually valid reasons they were paired together and in the end, there was only one thing I was sure of and I had made sure to tell your male that last night. Do you wish to know what it is?"

"Yes." 

"The moon makes no mistakes, Theia."