Ranty Blog, Feeling Eh about Pacing

First off some progress on the image pack. 

16/20 images have been sketched.

2/20 of them are fully colored and fully finished.

Those are going along pretty well... but I'm just kinda upset in general. In 4 months MHFAP will be a year old and we haven't even started chapter 3 yet. Hell, there's still 15 pages of filler comics before I can even start chapter 3. I'm just so damn sick of having to do commissions and constant interruptions, not to mention the amount of people trying to talk to me at all hours of the day feels overwhelming at times. 

I have such big and epic plans for MHFAP! but at this rate it feels like I'll never tell even a 10th of the stories I want to tell. I'm a story teller, and I have so many ideas that are being held back by my lack of funding. This isn't a 'give me more money' thing it's a in-general feeling sick of this shit kinda thing. 

So much of my time is spent worrying and stressing about ways to make my art faster without compromising the quality... and it all feels meaningless most of the time. Like no matter how much faster I get and how much commissions I get done I feel like I just get further from working on the main comic. It upsets me greatly.

That's why I can't even fulfill some of the Patreon rewards- Asks are fun but even with someone else doing the coloring for them it's not like they bring in enough attention on their own to my comic to justify making them right now- and they certainly don't make money. And the $10 weekly SexDex has happened like 4 times which shows you how badly I'm strapped for time lol.

I've thought that the fastest way to improve comic speed is probably if someone else did all of the colors and I paid them but colorists are expensive and I'd be very picky. So that's not remotely an option... I'm not sure if I'd even want to though, as I feel it'd be less my art then. Not to mention relying on someone else for part of MHFAP! scares me, i.e. if they wanted to leave and do their own thing. If they wanted more money and then I couldn't pay them and then the next page has a completely different coloring style. Let alone finding someone who could color both on my level and on my speed. I don't really think the colorist idea is a good angle.

But fuck, I need to think of something or I'll die without finishing MHFAP! one day. Not to sound too morbid or anything...

Also switching to black and white is not an option. A lot of people won't read a comic if it's not in color and I want to reach as wide an audience as possible.

Bleh, I'm not feeling depressed or anything but it's a big stress annoyance thing.