7 Years

Does anyone else find it really weird how little Denmark exports in the way of music, as compared to its neighbors Sweden and Norway? Big Danish bands that some people might have heard of are Mercyful Fate, Volbeat, Mew, the bands Todd mentioned at the end, these chumps, and... not much else, as far as I'm aware. Seems like the most interesting thing they've got going on right now is the New Wave of Danish Fuck You, and that's super, super niche.

protondonor

Oh and as for predictions as to your placing of this song on the worst list: I'm thinking number 2. This song is as bad as Fight Song was last year. Granted, I put Fight Song as my worst song of 2015 but you placed that song pretty high. Speaking of Rachel Platten, she got a second hit I guess. And it's dull and soulless. Not Fight Song bad but still bad.

Yvette

I also like the 21 pilots song a lot better.

Zachery Egan

Oh God I hadn't seen the video before. Why is there a little black kid in the video? Is it supposed to be visual shorthand? "Don't think of me as a pasty child in Copenhagen, imagine me as THIS URBAN CHILD!" Also I don’t want to hate on his looks, but that level of grandiose pomposity in the song made me assume he’d keep his shirt on unless he’d have a six pack. LOOK AT THIS EXPLOSION BEHIND OUR LEAD SINGER! Our lead singer who looks like a slightly chubby fourteen year old. He’s a pompous douche in the present and past shit, but he’s an outright asshole for the future stuff. Like, he’s not thirty yet, and you can TELL with his “Eh, this shit happens when you get older, right? Babies? Grandkids? DEATH?” attitude . I know it's supposed to be about fatherhood and his own father, but it's both sexist and agist. "MY woman, WHO I OWN, gave me children WHO I ALSO 100% OWN!" you have three years left to find a nameless woman to own and pop out babies for you, dude. “My wife and I have children” is just way less insulting. And he's imagining himself as an immortal rock god, but instead of “Soon I’ll be sixty years old, I’m still performing and learning about music” it’s implied “I’m inertly shitting my diaper in an old folks home, I hope my kids visit because THERE’S LITERALLY NO OTHER JOY IN MY LIFE!”

Eh, a lot of artists annotate their own lyrics. I wouldn't hold that against him. What I WOULD hold against him is that his annotations often have nothing to do with the lyrics they're linked to.

MrTyeDye

You may not get pop music, but you get why this song is an abomination. And the latter is worth your time and effort.

I cannot freaking stand this song either, and I kinda agree that a lot of 2016 music seems to have passed me by, maybe I'm getting old as well. And OH MY GOD HE ACTUALLY ANNOTATES HIS OWN LYRICS ON GENIUS.COM?! Also the "You suck Denmark, this is why Sweden produces all the good music" rant want hilarious, because it's kinda true for them in Eurovision as well = Denmark sends crap (apart from a few songs) and Sweden sends songs that do really well. xD PS - If you want really good Danish music, check out a band called Mew, they're awesome.

Kylie

I love this song, it's gonna be one of my favorite songs this year. Lukas Graham's inspiration for the song was his dad who at 61, and some of the lyrics - like the ones about smoking pot - is a reference to him growing up in Freetown Christiana, one of the most notorious neighborhoods in Copenhagen. And i'm not saying all this because im from Denmark myself, If you don't like the song Todd, that's fine with me, I often like alot of songs that you hate, but I still enjoy watching your reviews of them.

So this song is basically a terrible Scrubs end song?

Great review, Todd! When I first heard this song I was intrigued, but it's so transparent and vapid that after about 2 listens I couldn't stand it.

I tend to believe his claims about drinking and smoking pot at the age of eleven - it's one of those gross things that deadbeat "cool dads" sometimes allow or encourage in their kids. But true or not, it's still pathetic of him to brag about it like that.

Honestly, I don't care if you're following the trends in writing your critiques. Your critiques are always really good, and valuable - whereas there are a -million- shallow think-pieces on this or that new song, all jostling to be the first to say anything about it for traffic reasons.

Brett

Wow. This was some of Todd's best work. I actually really like pop music in 2016 as a whole, but every word he says about this song is correct. Nailed it.

Jacob Alys Rudolph

I heard this song and instantly hated it even without knowing the lyrics.

Delbert Sparks

GOD DAMN SPIT THAT FIRE! Seriously, that was fantastic.

Adam Nelson

You forgot about Aqua. They are the most successful Danish band with 33 million albums and singles sold. Besides "barbie girl" I liked a lot of their other songs on their first album.

I really wish Adele's Water Under the Bridge had caught on more. If it did, it would probably my favorite hit song of the year.

Brad Riegner

This whole year has been shit so far. 2015 was so good, I'm amazed how quickly everything has evaporated. And what's more frustrating is, there aren't even those few songs like Shut Up and Dance to carry us through the doldrums like we had this time last year. I really wish Adele would re-release Water Under the Bridge. If I just had that song to carry me through this drought, I'd be happy.

Brad Riegner

I despise his song so much. Even worse than last years Rude, and i didn't think that was possible. I'm glad you made the Five for Fighting comparison, cause thats right where my mind went with it too.

Colby Kline

Funny that you mentioned Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots. When that song first came out, I hated it, but I gradually warmed to it and now I don't think it's so bad. By contrast, I liked 7 Years just fine the first few times I heard it, but as I started thinking about the lyrics more and more, I started to resent it more and more. It doesn't help that I'm over 30 and the song is yet another in the theme of "life ends at 30" subset that 20-somethings are so prone to writing... If onlythe charts weren't so godawfully dead right now. By the way, I follow a 16-year-old music critic on youtube who agrees that 2016 has been pretty terrible so far. You're not the only one who's having trouble relating to this shit, Todd, we all are.

Brad Riegner

If it makes you feel any better, a lot of the shit in the Top 20 are actually shit.

Josh Spicer

Oh goody, another song I'm actually a fan of. Thank the unknown Todd is a funny man.\

Josh Spicer

Haha, I had the torture of hearing someone do this at karaoke the other week and I was like, "what the hell is this crap?" I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thinks this!

Steve Martin

What galls me the most about this song is they really act like its some grand revelation. They say it took fucking years to write but I'm calling bullshit because songs that take years to write don't have lyrics so awful. Your parents are telling you to get married at 11? Fucking bullshit you lazy asshole you just didn't want to repeat the once I was 20 years old part for the sake of avoiding repetition. I have not heard lazier songwriting in my life. This song is the very worst and I hope we send these lazy narcissists back to their country to keep their stink out.

Andrew Conrad

Whenever I hear Graham sing "will-a" during the end of the song, I always hear that part in "down with the sickness " that goes "ohwhahahaha"

Oh god I first heard this song a few days ago at work and I also thought it was a rip off of that other song you mention. Also, Adele's When We Were Young is a better song on growing old and all that stuff. One Call Away and this song are probably making it on my worst list for 2016.

Yvette

"At seven, making friends isn't that hard." Well gee, I wish someone'd told me that when I was that age, cuz I had no friends as a kid!

Nope, you didn't hate it enough. :P

George Morgan

God bless you Todd.

It seriously makes my day when you post one of these

Sarah Wampler

Man...I really needed this. Thanks Todd.

Greg Walters