![[MMHA] What still keeps you up at night?](https://img5.xaiju.com/storage/7/wk/oq/d38796-019e8f0d-89c6-7c42-b11d-d959654c71ac.png)
[MMHA] What still keeps you up at night?
Added 2025-05-30 12:00:16 +0000 UTC
Comments
The constant thought of me being a failure in life, being the distant son/ brother, the sense of being lost, forgotten, betrayed. All pretty bad things, but the loneliness hits the hardest. I want a relationship with someone, I do, I really do. But im scared, I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I ever get one. I'm lazy, selfish, and a hermit who doesn't like going out at all. I wouldn't want my lifestyle to ruin anything, and I hate myself for how I am. How can I love someone if I can't love myself? I think it's better for me to stay this way. Sure it sucks to be lonely, but there's so much peace to it. I have no worries about taking them to dinner, gifts on thier birthdays, arguments for the sake of arguments. I think of all this every night...
illegal amigo
2025-06-03 09:54:08 +0000 UTCA lot of things actually, the past. Mental Trauma Things I have seen, things I have done. Even worse things I haven't done, actual physical Pain i have from old injuries, and then, there is the immediate effect of my brain starting to process the day as soon as my body shuts off. That's a thing people on the autism spectrum often have to deal with. It doesn't matter if I go to bed at 20:00 or 23:30. I often just don't sleep before 01:30. Week days I usually manage pretty well, the later in the week the better. but holidays, or especially the sunday to monday nights are really bad. I often watch the sun come up.(writen on Sunday, no monday at 00:45-ish🥲)
OffWorld97
2025-06-01 22:51:47 +0000 UTC
