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gladiusx
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Chapter 7 of No Joy is out for Squires!

I figured how to return to proper embeds. Or perhaps it's Patreon who added the option back. I'm not sure which, but all should be well.

The trolling continues. Chapter is a bit wild, all things considered, but y'all shoulda expected this when you voted for a crack-taken-seriously fic. Do let me know your thoughts in the comments.

You can read the previous chapters in the collection.

Chapter 7 of No Joy is out for Squires!

Comments

make a scene Another anachronism "Mummery" is the setting appropriate term

Pearl of the Orient

buttoned off the padded Unbuttoned, although gambesons and padded Jack's don't have buttons. They use leather ties. Buttons are not strong enough to hold them close in practice, much less combat. Buttons were for civilian attire and an understated fashion choice

Pearl of the Orient

Same page should be changed to "of like mind" it's not only an anachronism it is also at odds with the Westerosi disdain of less martial pursuits for the phrase to have gained hold among the nobility

Pearl of the Orient

That pelican bomb, though! Gotta get some amusement, Jon, eh?

Luxanna Aeterna

Didn't he leave his tourney sword to the elderly servant as well?

Luxanna Aeterna

So happy you went with fat Viserys instead of leprosy.

Maniac000

Cue Zuko "That can't be it where's the rest of it"

Bukhari

Hi! Is there another way to get extra chapters faster like another membership tier. I love the story so much that waiting a whole week feels like torture. I need my fix faster.😆😆😆❤️

michelle m

Rhaenyra might be half (or full-on) starving him while he’s down there out of spite for being out maneuvered, though I could see Daemon ensuring he’s got food.

thevolunteer

I think his dragon prefers the color bronze...or silver (would be a compromise to gray).

Grimgoth

Maybe Silverwing bonds with whatever women with Targ ancestry Jon falls for (which means she likes to fish too). I doubt Jon would call his faction the Blues. His colors are black (already taken), grey and white. Black is his color per canon, and Stark colors are grey and white.

stevem1

Funnily enough, I was also experiencing nausea righte before the chapter dropped.

Hedincool

It has to be Jon himself sending the message in previous chapter with one of the pelicans. We learned in this chapter that it wasn’t a message to Daemon

Myrdin

Yeah please don’t nerf Jon with option 2. Option 3 and Otto coming at end of the battle is just cherry on top. Also ditto to the original comment, love how it’s subverting regular fan lines without misrepresenting the characters

ModNsparksPhilo22

Why do I feel like Daemon is the one who sent the message…

InnerDemons

I'm afraid the truth is far more boring. Might as well reveal if the chance doesn't present itself later in the narrative. One of Silver Denys' sons is in his pocket.

Gladiusx

Larys Strong is a bit too well informed about someone who he didn’t know existed until recently. I guess the theory about him being a skinchanger has merit here. No way he would know so much without the gift or some other magic.

Myrdin

Damn. The chapter turned wild all right. The trajectory of the dance has changed significantly. I have a feeling that Jon will go through the Iroh phase in prison where he starts working out everyday. I bet Daemon would see through that he gets the adequate nutrition. Jon is going to straight out off the Velaryon knight. I had a doubt though. Jon left is armaments with Aethan and came to Dragonstone unarmed with just a tourney sword. Is it because he believed that Corlys would try to sabotage his armor? I have the feeling that the next chapter is going to be even more wilder. Daemon is going to totally take some popcorn and enjoy the show. Probably the best entertainment he got in a really long time.

Trive

Seems to me that Jon may very well end up being acknowledged as a Targaryen bastard. Daemon himself thinks that he has the looks. And he also has a dragon. It is mentioned in the chapter that without dragons, Lucaerys and Jacaerys would not be thought to be Targaryens. Vermithor is going to be the ultimate credential

Myrdin

Regarding the dragons, it's even more unusual. Vermithor has chosen Jon, but Silverwing follows her mate. So Jon is, loosely speaking, the first person yet in the timeline to command two battle worthy dragons. At this point, Daemon's cordial relationship with Jon may be the Blacks' last hope should Jon choose neutrality or go Green. Maybe Jon could start a third faction: the Blues who just want to bitch slap the idiots on both sides for ruining things for everyone.

deinekes9

I’m of three minds about the trial. 1. Isn’t it not gonna happen now? Jon’s gonna get the royal pardon before it can happen given that Rhaenyra decided to put him in a dungeon for 2 weeks. 2. Jon should sandbag to not draw even more attention to himself 3. Jon no-diffs. The old trope from Star Wars to old Samurai movies is defense-counterstrike-victory. I’d prefer to see him go full aggressive and end it in one or two swings of his sword. One barely gets blocked and the follow-up is too quick to hand and ends it.

thevolunteer

Thanks for the kind words. I have few more on fanfiction that I haven’t ported over yet, but the earlier ones are a bit rough. And Gladiusx is an excellent writer. I wish I had his time/discipline.

stevem1

That would have been an ultimate burn.

stevem1

I've never seen a fic where Jon is pushed towards the Greens, however unwillingly. And Daemon being the sole sane and mostly friendly Black? Unprecedented! Really looking forward to the interplay between Jon, Vizzy T, and Haelena. Also hope there's something similar to Bron's performance at the Eryie for Jon's trial.

deinekes9

Awesome chapter bossman jr. Although, where is little Shaggy at?

Dark-Palace

Hypothetically, the Cannibal could give Vermithor a hard time if they ever fought. Although, chances of Cannibal going after another dragon its size or bigger seems unlikely given the hunting pattern of targeting younger dragons. Also, it's cool to see you in this thread. I've enjoyed your fics on AO3.

Archimedes

Thanks for the chapter

Ulquiorra Schiffer

Awesome chapter as always. And just like that Vizzy T changes the entire game!

Birdy810

I do wish Jon, before calling for a trial by combat, had said in his defense something along the lines of “They were already maimed, useless, and stupid. What has really changed?”

thevolunteer

Mentioned in the chapter that Corlys has picked one of his knights, poor bastard is gonna get one shot. I can’t even think of a single notable or even named knight sworn to Corlys that isn’t family, and I doubt that he will throw one of his dwindling supply of relatives into the Velaryon Crippler 9000 that is Jon.

thevolunteer

Lol Jon is such a troll. Love it.

Perraup

Honestly might not be that much of a mistake on the kings part. Getting the north moving earlier, depending on how this plays out could be beneficial to the kingdoms. A legitimate Jon, when his dragon rider status comes out, plus the Valerion steel blade, means a Northern dragon rider unconnected to either side, green or blacks and more importantly not connected to the crown at all which is a huge problem for Otto. That's the type of political spanner in the works that could severely mess with the Hightowers. Daemon is also gonna enjoy the fuck outta the future trial by combat. Also he's gonna be motivated as fuck to kick the rust off, which is only good for the blacks. I can't wait for his and his daughters reactions when verminthor gets revealed. Daemon is gonna be like a kid on Christmas morning and hope one of his daughters crushes on him turns out positive. I wonder who Jon will have to fight for the trial though. Daemon will refuse obviously cause he is gonna wanna watch the show

Bishop7053

Excellent chapter. Jon’s fight with Daemon should be a wake up call for Daemon. He needs to hit the yard hard over the next several months if he wants to be ready for a war. Viserys is the only Targaryen keeping his eye on the ball. Jon saved his nieces and is due a reward. Under what Velaryon and Rhaenyra are cooking up, no commoner would ever lift a hand to save a royal from a lunatic noble. Writing off 90%+ of the population as loyal supporters show that both sides are brain dead. Viserys showing a modicum of common sense is a shocker. Corlys has lost his mind. His nephews attacked his granddaughters. The same nephews who incurred the king’s displeasure. You’d figure that eventually he’d learn to cut his loses. So much for being a clever sailor, negotiator, businessman. Jon is very blasé about all of this. I guess being on his second (third?) life means the whole mortal peril thing loses its threat value. And he has Vermithor as a plan B, if it comes to it. Nothing on Dragonstone (or Driftmark) can stand against him. Maybe Vhagar (in KL), but I think Aemond would love to see Rhaenyra and Corlys (and by extension, Daemon) make fools of themselves.

stevem1

Man it’s escalating!!! I can’t wait to see it go down. Dreaming of Jon showing off Vermithor even though I know it won’t happen. Can’t wait for the next

Awesomeace18

Ofc no good deed goes unpunished, lol.

Eric Lachance

Kick ass. Daemon is about to enter his Training Montage arc. Jonny kicked the shit out of him with a tourney sword, only for Daemon to realize he could have been using Valyrian steel? Man was gonna be chewing popcorn watching his trial by combat, before the pardon and lordship came in. Cregan is going to show up in the south (or wherever Jon settles) sooner or later after the king made this monumental mistake.

thevolunteer

Cool

Ryan

Sweet, new chapter already! Thanks for giving my night a highlight as I suffer through stomach flu 👍🤢

Roguewave1737


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