An apology letter & why I wasn't active? (Health crisis, financial situation, plans for the future)

Hello my lovely Patrons. I'm starting this letter by saying - I'm very sorry for being inactive for such a long time and giving you so little content. I know you all follow me here for porn and are not very happy to read a wall of text - but today I need you more than ever. Recently many people decided to leave my Patreon page because of lack of activity. And I absolutely understand that. I understand that you are upset - you donate me to see some content. I want to explain my situation - what is going on recently, the reasons for my absence and plans for the future. So please, it's very important to me, if you're here - please read ♡

Why the lack of content? - The main reason is my health situation. I'm struggling with health issues for my whole life, for the past few years my main issue are dental problems. I have an important treatments that should be done months ago - but I cannot afford them. I was struggling with depression for over 10 years - this year I won a battle with this horrible disease. But the consequences are still there. Lots of things improved in my life recently, yes - but for example, I have two teeth that needs to be removed immediately. A consequnces of depression. I should have done that like half a year ago, but I cannot afford that. I struggle with chronic pain, insomnia and headaches that sometimes last for a month, I'm taking painkillers every single day and I'm basically bed-rotting. Everything because of my hypothyroidism and Hashimoto's disease (autoimmune disorder) I'm taking medications for it to the rest of my life. and few others but I'm not gonna explain everything, I'm feeling enough embarrased of talking about things like this, I don't want to act like a ''victim'' or ''weak''. I just want to be honest with YOU - people who trusted me and decided to donate to my content.

Why I post one thing and disappear for a while? - The reason is - my health sometimes gets better. When I'm having a disease regression - I'm feeling like myself again. I can draw, I can do everything. But it do not last that long - since I'm struggling with stable income I cannot get rid of all my problems at once. I have to save money or borrow it from my friends. (it used to be WAY better, now the amount of my Patrons dropped drastically. 85% of my Patrons are gone - which I absolutely understand I do not blame you - you don't see new content - you leave. It's understandable) That's why when it gets worse again - I do not have any power to get up and draw for you.

Plans for the future - As I mentioned at the beginning of this year, I want to give you more content. A friend of my even helped me by suggesting things I should implement. So I have lots of plans, lots of ideas. Collabs with other artists, more projects you haven't seen from me yet, etc. But this everything is not possible without your help. I'm very much in need of extra money, especially for dental stuff and daily life. I'm gonna be complitely honest with you. My income from Patreon is around 240$/month. Because of my health I'm unable (and honestly don't want to) get back to a ''regular'' job. That was YOU who helped me years ago when I needed you to help me pay my bills for basic stuff like electisity because I freshly quit my regular job because of my health problems. I was hospitalised a few times since then. A few of my animals needed urgent vet help and YOU helped me pay the vet bills. I know everything is possible, I need your help.

Some of you might remember about the money saving for moving from my toxic city I did like 2 years ago. But I still live in the same area, a small dangerous town with extremely close-minded people. I even did a post one day on twitter when I got attacked on the streets just for having colorful hair.) Since then we made a huge progress. Me and my partner are saving money to get a loan from a bank and buy a house and leave together to a safe place. It's HORRIBLY hard and long process but we will do it.

To continue posting art for you, I need to ask for help. Now I need money as I mentioned - for the most important things. For me and my animals. Health and bills. I'm saving around $2k. Even a small dontation will help me get rid of my problems and finally focus on creating all day. As a thank you - I will complitely focus on drawing and create more things for you.
Also, I absolutely do understand that some of you might be upset - I absolutely get that. If you cannot accept that situation, I understand that and maybe one day we will see each other again ♡

IMPORTANT: Please do not buy your subscription via Apple purchase system. They steal 30% fee and it means you have to pay more and I'm getting way less.. On top of that I have to wait for 75 days for money to be transferred to me. If you want to continue supporting me - please don't do it via apple purchase system.

You can help me by supporting me on Patreon by bigger amount or donating here - any amount will help. ♡ I highly suggest buying a one-year subscription - you will get a discount!
https://ko-fi.com/akasaihimi