XaiJu
Snekguy
Snekguy

patreon


Birds of Prey

A UNN fleet tasked with rooting out Bugs at the limits of Coalition space encounters an uncontacted alien species.

Hetero version: https://pastebin.com/QrxC8L6Y

Bi version: https://pastebin.com/GsBZHTex

Comments

Finished! Ebooks coming promptly.

Snekguy

No covers are being worked on currently, no, I'm waiting for some artists to become available. Next up should be a Warband cover by Oouna as soon as their schedule frees up and they can fit me in.

Snekguy

Chapters 14-17 are edited, another 25,000 words. Just the Hetero version today as I'll need some time to reconcile the two versions. I'll probably do that at the end of the process.

Snekguy

I am curious do you have new cover art coming out soon? I know that Meandraco is working on Birds of Prey art page but if you have other artwork being worked on for the other stories? The cover art that Oouna and Pimpartist have been really nice and pretty.

CMed

Chapters 10-14 are edited, another 30,000 words.

Snekguy

Another 30,000 words are edited, chapters 4-10. I'm about half way done now.

Snekguy

Where's the producer of that first contact video at? He needs to add that the proper first meeting involves the tongue and the patented 'Earth'nay diplomatic organ'

ItWasn7Me

It's just occurred to me that in the pinwheel setting, the defining trait of humanity appears to be 'only race that can give good oral'.

Kami-Kaze

The first 25,000 words are edited, chapters 1-4. I may not be able to get much done tomorrow, I have to do some IRL stuff, but I'll post what I can.

Snekguy

Great story!

ItWasn7Me

2000 word update, finished! Editing should take a little under a week.

Snekguy

That really sounds cool. There is an opportunity to bring the Rig Runner characters Nazka (and hopefully Erikson) in the upcoming Borellian Story, since it would deal with her people.

CMed

This has been a good story man, im excited for the next one

SketchyWarrior

2500 word update. I also just realized that there were supposed to be Valbaran carriers fighting in the space battle. Herp derp. I'll add them in during the editing phase. One more update and I should be done.

Snekguy

That was awesome. Was on the edge of my seat during the whole zcene.

-Vulp-

3500 word update

Snekguy

Definitely feeling very ace combat.

Kami-Kaze

2500 word update

Snekguy

"Of course it was Coza..." I had to stop reading there for a few minutes while I recovered from my fit of laughter. I think this is one of the best space battle scenes I've read in awhile great read Snek!

ItWasn7Me

2000 word update

Snekguy

*Danger Zone begins playing in the distance*

SketchyWarrior

2000 word update

Snekguy

Coza is the kind of person who when having a bad day you stay as far away from as possible and throw birb chocolate at till she's feeling better, or else you risk a very painful yet flashy end

ItWasn7Me

2000 word update

Snekguy

Are their scooters like segways? I was just picturing 5ft birds in full combat gear and rifles riding segways around a city and wanted to make sure I was chuckling about the proper mental image

ItWasn7Me

I'm glad to hear that you enjoyed reading through them! I have a fanworks tag on the Patreon where I post the fanfictions people send me, and if you'd like to discuss the setting or pitch ideas, the Community section would be a great place to do it. I had some issues in the past where I wasn't getting email notifications when people posted there, but I think they fixed that now. I really want to foster a community, because I believe that's the real lifeblood of a setting like mine, so if you guys want to start threads on the Community page and discuss ideas or lore, I'll be able to check them regularly. I have considered using some of the Patreon funds to rent server space for a website, but I feel like the Patreon does everything I really need it to do in terms of interaction with readers, and I'm trying to make it the central hub for all my work.

Snekguy

2000 word update, resuming daily updates on both versions.

Snekguy

I am also curious if you have a dropbox, forum, or place for readers to provide story ideas or ideas in general? I had a chance to read all the Pinwheel stories and enjoyed all of it. I wanted to make sure (along with the other readers) that you didn't run out of ideas and to help contribute to the cause.

CMed

Thank you for your support CMed! Yes, I have concept art for the Valbarans on the way from Meandraco, I can't give you an ETA on that unfortunately as he's very busy with the next release of his game right now. Hopefully he'll have time once that goes live. I also plan to get a book cover done for the story as soon as possible, featuring several characters and the Teth'rak if I can afford it.

Snekguy

2000 word update to the Bi version, that scene has concluded, and there's a small update to the Hetero version that serves more as a teaser for tomorrow's update. Now back to our scheduled planetary invasion.

Snekguy

I am curious, do you plan to have anybody do the artwork for the Birds of Prey story? I am enjoying the story and even donated money to help the cause. :)

CMed

2000 word update to the Bi version

Snekguy

Adorabirb continues to be appropriate. I desire only to get my own yaotl. On an unrelated note, I kind of wonder if the differing but very distinct personalities in the flock is something they cultivate, rounding out the group and taking roles, subconsciously or not. (I will admit to really wanting to see jaeger get hands on with yaotl to do a bit of exploration, but i'm also aware you probably want to wrap the scene up about now)

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update to the Bi version.

Snekguy

I'd probably go with "androgynous male partner" for the tag. Less baggage.

Ezekiel Paul

2000 word update to the Bi version, I also went back and fixed a few errors in both versions that you guys pointed out. I'm not entirely sure about the tags as I don't produce or consume a lot of this kind of content, but I suppose Yaotl qualifies as a trap or a femboy, and there's probably some kind of specific term for a first time gay experience. Perhaps those who are more familiar with those subcultures can clue me in?

Snekguy

The Earth'nay Diplomatic Organ.

Ezekiel Paul

That first contact training video really should be updated, cause it seems like "stick your dick in it" is a wildly successful tactic.

-Vulp-

Line 2351 is probably meant to say Tacka, not Ayau.

Kami-Kaze

2500 word update to the Hetero version. That scene has now concluded, and I'll start work on the Yaotl scene for the Bi version tomorrow.

Snekguy

That sounds perfect :D

JimTheEnchanterer

2000 word update to the Hetero version. Thanks for your input guys, what I'm going to do is a hybrid Tacka/group scene for the Hetero version, and then a 'Tacka wants Jaeger and Yaotl to fuck and everyone else joins in' scene for the Bi. I think that should cover all of the bases.

Snekguy

Obviously can't speak for everyone, but i'd probably like a tacka scene. I don't think anyone would genuinely complain that there's too much sex in your sex scenes.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update to the Hetero version, and 4000 word update to the Bi version. I figured out a way to port Coza's scene over to the Bi version and still have it fit with the upcoming scene so you guys are getting that one too. I'd like some input on where to take the scene next. I'm pretty happy ending the Hetero scene here, I could have Tacka get involved and then do a kind of fade-out where the scene ends but it's implied that they continue into the night. Alternatively, I could write Tacka's scene in full, or even have a group scene with the entire flock, but my concern there would be that the scene might be getting too large, it's already at 13k words. More is not always better of course but it depends what you guys want. The Bi version will get a full scene with Yaotl before it concludes of course.

Snekguy

Don't worry, as long as there's some hot birb action I think we will all be happy in the end.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update, just to the Hetero version today. This is where the two sex scenes will start to diverge, so expect some delays to the Bi version as I write extra content and rework scenes.

Snekguy

Waiting for Kenorla to say they are keeping him after that

ItWasn7Me

2000 word update, this one might need another editing pass to catch any redundancy, but I ran out of time today.

Snekguy

I keep finding myself thinking 'poor yaotl'. Now I start to wonder if Baker is going to be disappointed come the morning.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update

Snekguy

Called it and loving it.

Ezekiel Paul

2000 word update. I just remembered that I said I'd start including tags at the beginning of stories now, so you can find them at the beginning of the Pastebin and I'll be updating them as the story progresses. I feel a little conflicted about this, because it almost feels like a spoiler, but at the same time I can see why it's necessary for avoiding unwanted surprises.

Snekguy

'This size difference must be what it's like to be a borealan!' Also, poor Yaotl off to the side.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update

Snekguy

I believe in you! Also, surprised by both presence of breasts and that intriguing line 'There's only one!'

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update. I'm trying to do both versions at once, but that might change as we get into the heavier stuff, so expect some minor delays on one version or another as I modify my workflow.

Snekguy

>divergence Oh boy oh boy, it begins. In a good way.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update to the Hetero version, and 2500 word update to the Bi version.

Snekguy

<a href="https://pastebin.com/GsBZHTex" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://pastebin.com/GsBZHTex</a> is the bi version for future reference.

Aurius

Would it be at all possible to put the link to the bi version in the OP? Thanks

JimTheEnchanterer

Flirting via talk of big guns.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update

Snekguy

Jaeger confirmed Fuckin NERD.

Ezekiel Paul

2000 word update

Snekguy

Yay! Plot!

Kami-Kaze

Woohoo, I'm finally done with the editing. The changelog has been updated with the final additions, all changes are reflected in both the Bi and Hetero versions of the story, and I'm ready to resume normal updates as of tomorrow, now with an entirely new cast of birbs. Thanks for bearing with me!

Snekguy

I've released another large update to the changelog, there's an entirely new 1000 word scene, along with a bunch of edits and additions. I think I'll probably need to do one more day of editing, and then I can get back to continuing the plot.

Snekguy

Yes, I'll be detailing that fairly soon.

Snekguy

Is there any meaning behind the different sections to their names? Such as family names, gender, social status or anything like that?

ItWasn7Me

I can't say anything feels overtly stiff to me going through the changes. I did notice a slight error in the edited scene with Scratcher. It says Kenorla attempts to explain what their ritual means but Coza is the one who actually ends up explaining it. Overall I like the little bit of extra characterization and look forward to seeing more!

Aurius

<a href="https://pastebin.com/EeNYq3mZ" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://pastebin.com/EeNYq3mZ</a> Here's the changelog that lists all of the added interactions along with some context so that you don't have to re-read anything. I have begun to implement the new names (I'm leaving Kenorla as is for now). I've reduced the flock size from 6 to 5 and I've introduced each flock member by name, and given most of them a little bit of personality, let me know what you think. I'm about half way into the story at this point so I'll continue editing into tomorrow. I'll be adding more scenes and interactions with them, especially once they reach Valbara.

Snekguy

Not going to lie, half-expected valbaran strip bar.

Kami-Kaze

I don't mind you wanting to go back and make changes, even big ones, especially if you have a reason. As you said, this is essentially a writing process, not finalised chunks of story. If you think it'll work out better this way, totally go for it and by the end you'll have a good story to be proud of i'd bet.

Kami-Kaze

Ok so I'm going to need to implement some changes on this one. I've been struggling with whether to have the Valbarans be smooth-scaled, or if they should have fur-like proto-feathers, but I recently thought of a way to include both varieties as different races. I'd like to implement that into the story which will require a few edits here and there, but will result in a much more diverse and visually interesting race. I thought that I could treat the flock as background characters but it hasn't really worked out the way that I wanted it to, so I'll be reducing the size of the flock, and going back to add in a little character development for them. With the revised naming system I've come up with, it should be much easier for you guys to remember them. I need to implement the new naming conventions too, so I'll probably do that at the same time. These are relatively minor changes, and I apologize if it causes much of a disruption to your reading experience, but I will be making sure that everything is as easily accessible as possible without requiring you to re-read vast swathes of the story. This is one of the pitfalls of making WIPs available, but in my defense, it's rare that I need to make these kinds of edits. The result should be a markedly superior story.

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

It's 50 50 situation really. Kenorla does know what kind of relationship human couples have, so she will have to rake that in consideration. Jaeger seems to be a person who would like to have one partner. He has no emotional attachment to the rest of flock members so far and he doesn't acknowlegde them, so he may not want to be involved in 1 to 6 relationship. The flock may not want a male that cannot sire their children (unless life finds a way...) Kenorla said flock members came and left. Baker may ended up with lizard girlfriend too.

Lev

Anyone wanna place bets on if Jager ends up with just Kenorla or her entire flock? They do share males afterall

ItWasn7Me

Time for a victory parade. Or other victory activities.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update

Snekguy

I dunno' man, this might be a few too many words. More seriously, nothing wrong with goofy if you want to go with that.

Kami-Kaze

I just gotta say you still produce a great amount of stuff, even if things get a little off track

SketchyWarrior

1700 word update, I'm a little short of the mark today. I wrote a whole scene where they were riding a Krell's back to escape and it was fucking goofy, I had to can it and do some rewrites. Ran out of time. Also had to make a minor retcon for this scene to work, the Teth'rak is now South relative to them.

Snekguy

Amen.

AnimeFem

You can be thankful and like the story and have criticisms about it.

Silverroses76

Dont want to add up the conflict here but I'm enjoying the long plot. Honestly it makes the whole romance and sexual experience sooo much better when you build up to it first rather then just jumping right into it. I dont think you should cut out any parts of the story, I enjoyed reading every word of it so far. Yes, I can understand that people are anxious for some sexual content. As much as I do as well, it's not worth comprising the original plot just to satisfy a sexual need that SnekGuy is gonna add in anyways. As always, SnekGuy doesn't disappoint. Good stories cant be rushed! I'm just thankful that he makes his stories for everyone, patron or not. Be thankful guys!

AnimeFem

Wow that's a lot of feedback! Patreon engagement stats are blowing up lol. I hear you, you want more porn with your lore, and it's coming. My plan is to advance the Jaeger/Kenorla romance after the probe is dealt with, and then the invasion will be the capstone of the story. I won't be making you wait until the end for the romance to conclude on this one. If this conversation needed to be had at all, it means that the story could probably use some cuts in editing to improve the pacing, but one of the benefits of sharing work in progress with you guys is that I get to make changes like that rather than risk releasing an inferior product. I'm glad that so many of you are enjoying this one, thank you for engaging with me, your feedback is invaluable!

Snekguy

I'm torn, I really enjoy where this story is going however it would of been nice to see a little more build up between Jager and the flock since we have to wait the for the battle to be over and this seems like it's set to be one of your longer stories. Goetic Justice 2 is your longest story yet -as far as I can tell- and it was 2265 paragraphs or whatever those numbers mean and this one is 1730 and we are still building up to a big battle

ItWasn7Me

People are saying that they are okay with more plot, but I'm only here for hot interspecies loving. As much as the pinwheel backstory and plot is cool, I mostly find myself skimming to get to hot stuff. It's ok to have plot, but remember why a lot of people were brought here originally.

Agreed, I was not expecting to like this as much as I do now so I don't mind you branching out if you want to spend more time on plot.

The Glimmering Warlock

Made an account just to say that I love the story so far. This is easily one of my favorites that you've done and I eagerly await your updates for it. I personally enjoy how much more plot and world building there is. Obviously that might not be true of everyone, but I felt that I should at least mention it. Thank you for all of your high quality stories and the fantastic universe you've created!

Aurius

Silver is right kinda tho. I'm not sure if it's moving at a snail's pace, but come on dude you know why we are here lets be real. At least when your older stories were short the good parts came faster. I personally noticed this trend since Geotic Justice 2 came out. I felt like that was more plot driven than sex driven. But hey man, you do you I will still be here so whatever.

This is most definitely not moving at 'a snails pace'. I quite enjoy the entirety of this. I keep literally checking back every day so I can read more. Good work yo.

Rodney the Paladin

Poor woodlouse. Obviously it must become a new character with sex scene.

Kami-Kaze

If you're talking about the plot, I can maybe make some cuts in editing where necessary to improve the pacing. If you're talking about a lack of sex, there's plenty coming up, I'm just really taking my time with setting everything up first. Expect the usual amount of porn, at least 8000 words or so.

Snekguy

Like it seems this story is more focused on plot and even if there wasnt a sex scene it wouldnt need one. I guess that's ok, and i appreciate the time u put to actually give your sext stories...well, stroies. However, i hope this doesnt become something where we get a wall of lore and plot and one 1,000 word sex scene. Once again, Im sorry if this seems harsh or me demanding u to do something. Im just voicing my opinion

Silverroses76

This story seems good so far. I guess you got to introduce this new species before we get to the sexy parts. Overall though this story feels like its moving at a snail's pace. I lile ur longer stories but this feels stretched out a bit. Thats's just my opinion tho please take it with a grain of salt.

Silverroses76

2500 word update

Snekguy

I do like the descriptions hammering in the alien nature of everything.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update

Snekguy

I can see this going exceptionally well with no possible issues. Alternatively I can see it going terribly but ending up in a Crashland-type situation.

Kami-Kaze

2500 word update

Snekguy

I'd be fine with it, although i'd probably ask not to change the names of any existing ones. Mainly just because it might make it very confusing very fast.

Kami-Kaze

So about the Valbaran naming conventions... The more I think about them, the weaker they seem, they're just not very memorable. I've also done research and as far as I can tell the Aztec names in Stellaris are simply from a mod, they're not in the base game, can any players of the game confirm this? What do you guys think about me just doing what I originally intended and giving the Valbarans Aztec themed names like Qotl or Itzpa or Quetz? It seems kind of obvious, and it's not wholly original, but I can't help but feel that it immediately makes the characters more recognizable and memorable. I'd still be using the three syllable system, just with Aztec syllables that can be abbreviated into more memorable names. (This may also allow me to name the other members of the flock without it becoming impossible to follow)

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

Welp, not going to even pretend that isn't an adorable dinobirb.

Kami-Kaze

Alright, Bi version is a go. I'll be keeping both versions updated in tandem, so continue to read the version that appeals to you as normal. The OP is the Hetero version, and here is the Bi version: <a href="https://pastebin.com/GsBZHTex" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://pastebin.com/GsBZHTex</a> The Hetero version has a 2000 word update, the Bi version has a 4000 word update.

Snekguy

2000 word update, Bi version will be happening so I'll let you guys know when that version diverges.

Snekguy

There is totes demand.

Kami-Kaze

2000 word update, if you guys like the males, I could do a Bi version of this story if there's any demand for it.

Snekguy

I get the feeling, especially after jarilo, that we might end up feeling bad for the bugs.

Kami-Kaze

I'm so glad that you guys are enjoying this one so much! Output is mostly a motivational thing for me, I always try and write as much as possible. Sometimes I do 2000, sometimes 5000, sometimes 8000. Just depends on how I'm feeling really.

Snekguy

2500 word update

Snekguy

I'm beyond excited for the rest of this story! How much money would it take for you to just go crazy and pump out 5k words lmfao. My impatience is getting the best of me. Keep up the quality work, lots of funny and cute moments in it that make me smile at my phone like an idiot.

AnimeFem

Not going to lie, I am somewhat eager to see an illustration of this new species.

Ezekiel Paul

2500 word update

Snekguy

It's almost like they gon fuck or something.

Ezekiel Paul

I'm glad to hear that you're enjoying this one, thanks for the encouragement!

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

Thet'rak reminds me of dinosaur like animal from Monster Hunter World. Great job on animal description.

Lev

2000 word update

Snekguy

I really like your stories but this one is shaping up to be in whole different class. I really love this story and you have me hooked for every update. I really admire your tenacity to update 2000-3000 words every day. Keep up the good work

Joachim

2000 word update

Snekguy

I won't have time for that in this story, but it's not something that the Coalition can ignore, so it will probably happen in the future.

Snekguy

Will the story contain a liberation/retake of ker'gue'la from the established bug colony?

Joachim

While I was reading latest update, it occured to me it seems the story ignores Kenorla's flock members. They were never introduced properly to Jaeger by Kenorla and the only times they're mentioned are when they have to decide what to do together or when humans gave them codenames. I find it very odd considering any human when meets stranger ask for a name, because it's courtesy and respectful. It is basic social behaviour. Jaeger should have known all their names at this point at least, even though they let their leader talk most of the time. (Tho, story portrait them as social species, so I'm not sure why don't interact with main human characters on their own). Kenorla's flock members should have known english well enough due to their linguistic abillities. Making them real characters may benefit the story in a long run. Baker could start interact with them at some point. I hope we will get to know the rest of the flock soon. Except for that I enjoy story a lot.

Lev

2000 word update, made a small retcon to give Jaeger and Baker rucksacks full of gear that they'll need during their stay, or they'll be stranded on an alien planet without toothbrushes and clean underwear.

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

There is a mistake in what you just added, you cna't have a geostationnary orbit anywhere else than around the equator.

2000 word update

Snekguy

3000 word update, I added an extra scene to make the transition to the briefing scene a little smoother and fit some more biology in there. I also made some edits to yesterday's update. Start reading from "Jaeger bade farewell to his friends" and you'll be good.

Snekguy

Reading about the diplo and tech diferences in the universe always reminds me of Stellaris.

SketchyWarrior

2000 word update

Snekguy

Thanks for the catch, and I'm glad to hear that you're enjoying it!

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

As an FYI on line 624 you have the protag's name as "Yaeger" instead of with a "J", dope stuff so far though I'm super interested in how this plays out.

The Glimmering Warlock

2000 word update

Snekguy

Those bugs are up to something.

SketchyWarrior

2000 word update, also we have a Demon Gate cover by Oouna on the way, should be cool!

Snekguy

2500 word update

Snekguy

Hmm... I see new aliens come from place closer to us that we could think. ;)

Lev

That's a perfectly valid way to read my stuff. This one will probably run to about 100k words, probably a little over. I'm about 1/4 done, so it will probably be finished in late July, but don't hold me to that.

Snekguy

2000 word update, sorry this one is a bit late today, I had to do rocket science

Snekguy

Do you have a guesstimate on when this story will be finished? I'm not trying to rush you. I'm gonna be coming back in say 2-3 weeks to start reading the story. I like to read in bulk, rather than piece by piece.

legendm

2000 word update

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

3000 word update

Snekguy

And thus, the first recorded game of Space Charades occured

SketchyWarrior

2000 word update

Snekguy

Now the question is where do these birds go home to roost?

SketchyWarrior

3000 word update

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

Probably a good job for a xenobiologist.

Snekguy

2500 word update

Snekguy

I feel like there should be a separate vid for the Equatorial Borealans that is just "go to your quarters, lock the door, wait for further instructions. Also what's the likelihood a Polar decides to establish herself as a First Contact Specialist?

Ezekiel Paul

2000 word update

Snekguy

I love first contact scifi stories and here I get it. I can't wait to read about the second encounter with new alien race.

Lev

2000 word update

Snekguy

2000 word update

Snekguy

Name it "Storm season"?

Meandraco

If you like lizards you won't regret reading this one.

Snekguy

2000 word update, still no title, we'll get there!

Snekguy

I'm kinda hopping this guy gets with a nice krell girl.

Tim Thurman

Pretty interesting beginning. We all know that won't be simple recon mission for long ;)

Lev

*Highway to the Danger Zone Intensifies*

SketchyWarrior


More Creators