The Orc's Rose: Chapter Six (deluxe preview)

Chapter Six:

Ozren bought me new boots so that I could travel into Obresh during the cold seasons. I was a bit excited as I hadn’t been since it started getting cold out. I missed Meggie and Mr. Bodkin, so I made treats to take to the Odd Strawberry. I also had all the money I had been saving with me. I had been keeping it hidden away like I used to. But now, I thought, it would be the perfect time to buy something rather than hold on to it.

Since the Odd Strawberry wasn’t open, I wandered around the shops. I figured I would buy some supplies in order to make winter clothing, at least that was my plan. Then I saw the silversmith shop and I decided to have a peak. Back home in Sothen, silver had been the family business. My father owned a mine and he had a massive shop I had spent a lot of time in. I can still remember the heat upon my face when my father would take me to inspect the silversmiths and the wares they were making in his name.

“Good morning young lady.” The orc behind the counter was holding a box as I came in. “Have a look around at the samples. If there is anything you need, just tell me and we can prepare an order.”

I nodded and kept to myself as I looked at his cases of samples. He had beautiful work and I could see right away the differences between Sothen silverware and Obresh silverware. Sothen cutlery was delicate and light and featured ornate decoration. Obresh silverware was studier and with a much more useful design. But the detail, while not orante, was still intricate and thought out.

“Is there something you’re looking for?” The orc asked.

I felt a bit afraid to admit I wasn’t going to buy anything. “I’m sorry, I’m just looking.”

The orc smiled. “Well if you have any questions about anything, just let me know! Anything in particular you’re looking for?”

I shook my head, keeping it down. “Not really. I was curious since my family had a silver shop.”

“Is that so?” The orc stopped what he was doing. “Where do you hail from?”

“Sothen,” I replied. Still taking in the wares. My hand reaching out to touch the cool metal.

His smile faded and he got a strange look upon his face. He clicked his tongue and nodded. “I know all about Sothen and their silver.”

I’m not sure why that made me excited. “You do?”

The silversmith continued about his work, putting items into the counters. “My old man had a shop up in Sothen a long time ago.”

The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. “Oh.” my smile quickly disappearing. It must have been so hard. It was hard as a noble. To be an orc…

The orc grunted. “We moved down here when I was a kid. Some noble up there forced out all his competition.” he put a bundle of silverware down particularly hard. His eyes turning sour.

There was a dagger of ice in my spine. “I’m sorry.” i whispered quickly pulling my hand back. I suddenly felt out of place. Very wrong for me to be there.

“Nothing for you to be sorry about, girl.” He placed the ladle back into the case. “We like it here better anyways. The rich up in Sothen wanted crafts by their own kind anyways. Rich silver made by rich hands, sold to even richer hands.”

My guts churned, turning just as cold as my spine. “Right.” i grunted out. Folding my arms around myself i turn away. What right did i have being here when my bloodline, my ' class' caused so much damage.

He jerked and his eyes widened. “Not to say that- Oh shit I put my foot in my mouth didn’t I?” He laughed. “I’m sure your father’s shop was nice.” he straightened up overing such a bright smile.

I sighed, slouching my shoulders. “No, you’re right.” my eyes wandered the floor so i couldnt meet his gaze.

“Still, I’m sorry for speaking out of turn.” He set his empty crate aside. “But, saying that, I’m sure you’ve noticed a difference between Obresh silver and Sothen silver.”

I glanced back into the counter and nodded. “It looks more purposeful.” i allowed a small smile to form. Even though it maked sothen skill. It held so much more passion.

“Then you do have an eye for it.” He came over to me and opened a case. He pulled out a ladle from inside and handed it to me. “We’ve got bigger hands here in Obresh, dainty things like the people in Sothen use just won’t do. But how does it feel?”

I took the peice andfelt its weight. “It’s satisfying. The handle feels as though it fitted just for my hand.” I almost had the idea of spending my money on just that one ladle.

The silversmith placed the ladle back into the case. “And it’ll last several lifetimes, I can assure you that. So, how did the daughter of a Sothen silversmith find her way here to Obresh? Not looking to open a store down here are you?”

I shook my head scoffing. “Oh no. It’s a long story really. But I came here on my own. Or was. I got picked during the reaping.” i shrugged glancing up at the blacksmith.

The silversmith grinned. “Congratulations! Who's the lucky orc?” he sets the box down and leans on the counter giving me his full attention.

“Ozren Kogan.” My heart fluttered and I felt lighter when I said his name. It felt right to say his name.

The silversmith whistled. “How did you manage that? I figured Ozren would be a bachelor all his life.”

My cheeks warmed and that fluttery feeling inside me grew. “To be honest, I’m not too sure what I did.” my mind recalling all those nights i served Ozren. It seems so long again now.

“He’s a good guy. But I’ve heard stories about him when he was younger, hopefully that’s not an issue for you,” the silversmith chuckled.

I didn’t want to pry further. After all Ozren admitted he was something of an asshole in his youth. I looked a bit more before my eyes fell upon a set of small silver bands. They were shaped like a cuff bracelet, but they were much smaller. The pattern was twisting vines with a rose in the center. One was quite bigger than the other, but they both matched perfectly.

“Are these earrings?” I asked pointing eagerly at the bands.

“Yeah, they’re called mating cuffs here.” The silversmith came up beside me. “They’re an old tradition predating the reaping, but they’re still a popular item. They would be given to symbolize that, well, the couple were mating partners.”

My whole body warmed and I couldn’t take my eyes off the cuffs. Ozren had a couple of earrings already, so I could imagine him wearing this cuff, especially since there was a rose on them. His rose. A smile pulled at my cheeks.

“How much are they?”

The silversmith’s smile was knowing but sweet. “For the set, I can work out a deal with you, young lady. I have some others in the back. These are my display model.”

“I want those,” I blurted. “I mean, I would like those if possible. The rose on them means something between Ozren and I.” feeling the urge i reached out and let my fingertips trace the rose petals. It calmed me, i had to have them. For him.

He looked me up and down then smirked. “Alright. They’re my display because they’re a bit mismatched, so I can offer you a discount. Let me take them back to clean them and polish them for you.”

I smiled brightly. “Thank you so much!” i couldn't help the little bounce i had in my heels as i stepped back so he could grab them.

The silversmith boxed them nicely for me, and after a bit of haggling I left his shop with the mating cuffs clutched in my hands. My heart was pounding as I imagined giving Ozren his cuff. All I could hope was that he would like it, and maybe he would see that I truly, deeply cared about him. Maybe he would understand I was falling for him, but I couldn’t get the words out. The cuff would be my confession, and hopefully he could hear that.

“Rue!”

I turned to see Meggie coming up the street. I broke into a big smile and ran to meet her with a big hug.

“I came to see everyone at the Odd Strawberry,” I explained . “I was missing it.” i gave Meggie another small squeeze.

“I was just heading in to do some cleaning.” Meggie took me by the arm. “What’s that you have there?” she nodded to my precious package.

I held the little wooden box closer to me. “I bought something at the silver shop for Ozren and I.” I spoke softly, afraid someone else might hear.

“Mating cuffs?” Meggie gasped.

I turned bright red and looked around in case anyone had heard her. “I thought it…the silversmith said it was tradition so I-” I was getting more and more flustered.

“That’s so cute!” Meggie squeezed me. “I’m glad things are working out with you two. I’m a bit jealous.”

Meggie? Jealous over me? I looked up at her in surprise and saw the soft smile on her face. She looked both pleased but a little agitated.

“Your orc sweeps you off your feet, mine can’t even be bothered to be around for the reapings,” she pouted.

Meggie was always so popular at the pub, I figured she must have to turn down so many people. “You never told me you had someone.”

Meggie frowned. “He’s the head of the village, so I know he’s busy and has a lot he has to take care of. But I thought he’d at least come back for the reaping.”

“Oh,” I gasped. Poor Meggie

“Max is his name,” she murmured. “And when he gets back, I’m certainly going to lay into him.” She took out her keys and thrust open the door of the pub.

“I’m sure he didn’t mean to disappoint you, Meggie.” i try to soothe. The scent of ale and fresh bread wraps around me once more. It was good to be back.

“I know he didn’t. But you can’t tell a heart what to do.” She smiled at me. “Don’t worry. He likes it when I get mad.” She gave a playful wink that i just had to roll my eyes at. We walked into the Odd Strawberry as she pocketed her keys. Mr. Bodkin was going around, taking chairs off the tables and setting them back down. Having to go on his tippy toes for some of the newer higher tables.

Glancing over his shoulder he practically jumps over almost topling one of the chairs. “Well what a surprise!” He wiped his hands off on his shirt. “Meggie, what did you find?”

“Someone happy,” she scoffed. Looking to the side, the pout still on display poking out her bottom lip like a cherry.

Mr. Bodkin came and took my hands, kissing them both. “Come to the bar, Rue. I’ll fix you a drink.”

“I’m fine, you don’t need to,” I chuckled. He was always so good to me. And always a kind gentleman.

“Nonsense. I got some new wine and they gave me some sample bottles.” He took me to the bar and had me sit down. Well, he actually almost dragged me there but whos counting right? He walked behind and reached for a bottle, uncorking it and filling me up a glass.

“Go ahead and drink up. What else do you have to do today?” he laughed. He leaned in eager to heard fresh news.

I took the cup and sipped, the wine was sweet and fruity so I liked it right away. It was like candy, but it warmed me and sent tingles through my body like wine usually did.

Mr. Bodkin then glared at me. “You’re not here to tell me that Ozren hasn’t been treating you right, are you?” his hand slowly disappearing under the bartop.

I gasped. “No! Ozren has been wonderful. I wanted to come and see everyone.” i wave my hands franticallyfranticly before offeringoftering a bright smile.

“Good. I was ready to head over to that lumber mill and teach him a lesson if I had to.” He stepped down from the bar and continued setting the tables. “So, you’ve been doing well with being reaped?”

I took another sip of the sweet wine and nodded. “So far I have. Ozren’s been so kind and welcoming to me.” Slowly swirling the glass i recall our moments together.

“He better be,” Mr. Bodkin huffed. Thunking down another chair then waving a finger at me. " You a good woman. And a damn hard worker. Dont you let none tell you otherwise"

Meggie came back with her apron on and her hair tied back. She looked at me at the bar with the glassof wine in my hands. “Which wine did you serve her?” her hands gathering the stray strands.

“The strawberry,” he huffed. Turning back to the tables.

Meggie’s cheeks got red and her eyes widened. “You know what a light weight she is! Why did you offer her the strongest wine?” her hands not so subtly gesturing to me.

“Is it?” Mr. Bodkin grunted. Moving over the booths wiping them down.

Meggie took the glass from my hands and inspected it, finding it almost empty. “I’m taking her to Ozren.” she huffed glancing to me. Leaning away she plopps the glass and bottle far away from me.

“I’m fine,” I giggled. Reaching awkwardly for the glass. It was sweet and i didnt feel a thing. Mostly. Its fine. I licked my lips for the flavour. Funny you can taste lips but you cant taste your tongue. Weird. Heheh.

“No, you’re tipsy. I’m not letting you go home alone like this.” She helped me down from my stool and I wobbled a bit. “I’ll be right back, I’m just running her to the lumber mill.” Meggie called over her shoulder.

“Really, Meggie, I’m fine.” I did feel quite warm and fuzzy all over. I clung to Meggie’s arm, wanting to cuddle up close to her. She was nice. She smelled nice. Like daisy and rain. I sighed nuzzling her sleeve.

“It’s a good thing I caught you when I did. If you finished off that big glass you would have gotten sick.” Meggie scolded me.

" oh wait wait!" I lundged to the counter snatching the wooden box. " Its important! " i stuff it deep in my bag when smiled at my friend. " okay, we go now" Meggie huffef while leading me through the streets.

“But it tasted really good.” i whined. Was it so bad i had a glass? And it was like candy. Wait she had to know! " it tasted like candy!" Ya. Now she knows. Better now!

Meggie walked me through Obresh, heading towards the hill where Ozren’s lumber mill was. The walking did help me to sober up a bit, but I still felt fuzzy and clingy as we reached the front door.

I had never been to the lumber mill, but it was loud and full of people. The scent of perspiration and chopped wood was strong, but because of Ozren I had grown fond of such a scent. It meant he was home. And work made him happy. So sawdust meant happy. So i could have him home and happy. Right? This makes sense, right?

Meggie placed me by the door, sitting me down on a bucket. “Stay here! Don’t move! I’m going to go look for him.” Meggie ordered.

Even though she was being bossy I nodded with a smile on my face, sitting there as Meggie charged through the cluster of men who were working around tables and saws. I swayed there in my seat, humming to myself as I waited. Sawdust smelled good because of Ozern. Does that mean everyone here smells good? No they all would have their own scents. Do i have a scent? What do i smell like? I giggled again  I watchinged the people there working, orcs, humans, a minotaur, and something I thought might be a tiefling, were walking around with heavy loads of lumber and tools. There was an order to how they all moved and walked about the equipment which I could see.

I yawned and covered my mouth with my hand. The warm fuzzy feeling from the wine was now making me sleepy. I dreamily looked about until I saw Meggie come forward with Ozren right behind her.

“Hi!” I cheered and held my arms up to him. Ozren! He looks so pretty. My silly pretty man.

Ozren smiled. “Hello there.” He caught me easily as i jumped in his arms. Well flopped down but shhhh dont tell anyone.

“Sorry about this. I just didn’t want her to go home alone like this,” Meggie said siad. Gesturing to me. She offered a half smile to Ozren before sighing at me.

Ozren knelt down and helped me up. I cuddled up to his side and hugged onto him. Ahh sawdust and him. Perfect. Love it. “Don’t worry. We’ll get her some water in my office and I’ll finish up a few small things. I’ll get her home in one piece.” He answered with a nod of his head.

“You better,” Meggie fussed. “It was good to see you, I’ll come by and visit when I can.” She waved to me and left in a hurry.

“What am I going to do with you, Rose?” Ozren led me off, taking me outside and then into a room where the main feature was a desk.

“It was really good wine,” I hiccuped. " Oh!! It tasted like candy. Good candy ya know like the good stuff. Not like taffy. But candy!"

He chuckled and kissed my cheek. He cupped his hands around my face, his hands smelled oil and sawdust, but they were warm and attached to him.

“It’s funny, I was just thinking to myself that I wanted to see you when Meggie showed up.” the orc smirked taking me in.

“I came into town today,” I giggled.

I took his hand from my face and inspected his fingers. Good strong. With bit of oil. I poked the oil and drew a smily face on his palm. Ya. Much better.

He kissed me softly. “I’ll go get you some water.” gently he pulled his hand from my grasp and rose.

“Thank you!” I sang then leaned back in his chair. The room was warm, but that also could have just been me. I pulled my legs up, tucking them under my skirt and hugging my knees to me. I then remembered I had a gift for Ozren and I reached for the little wooden box in my bag. In trying to get it I plopped out of the chair and fell into the floor. Ouch. I lwt my legs flop down before sitting up. Pushing my hair back from my facd when i hear the door open.

Ozren came back in as I was picking myself up. “What are you doing down there?” He knelt down beside me, helping me gather myself off the sawdust covered floor. His shoulders shook as he tried to hide his laugh.

“I fell, I was trying to get something in my bag.” I held up my bag upside down and everything spilled out. “Oh no.” i move to grab everything but i ended up just waving my arms.

Ozren chuckled and helped me pick up my things. He reached for the box and I tried to snatch it from his hands. He looked at me surpised pulling his hand back. He opens his mouth but i rush first.

“That’s for you! But I want to give it to you.” I took the box back and suddenly my heart pounded. My nerves were winning out over the wine. What would he think. Would he be mad. I mean we never really talked about orc traditions before.

“You got me a present?” Ozren smiled. “You’re my gift, you didn’t need to get me anything, my Rose.” he placed his hand on my back to keep me steady. I was thankful for it. For him.

“I know. But-” I stood shakily and leaned against the desk. “But that’s why I wanted to. Because you’re my gift too. ”

His expression softened and his mouth fell open. “Rose-”

I held up a hand. “Let me say it while the wine is still here. Because I’ll chicken out if I don’t do it now.” I opened the box and showed him the mating cuffs inside. If my hands shook im glad he didnt say anything.

Ozren’s shoulders stiffened and his jaw dropped further. The slight tilt of his brows made his eyes look softer and wider. He leaned forward before flicking his eyes up to mine. I swallowed hard.

“Do you know what they are?” I asked. Did i do the right thing?! They were these ones right?!

Ozren snickered and nodded. “Yes. Yes, my Rose, I know what they are.”

My lip trembled while i took a shuddering breath “I’m scarred a lot. I don’t know how to accept what you give me. But I want it. I need you. So-” My breath fluttered in my chest. “They have roses on them.”

“I see that,” he said so quietly. “My Rose, I don’t know what to say. I’m speechless. This is the best thing I never could have imagined today.”

I took the bigger mating cuff from the box. “Can I put it on you?”

Ozren knelt down and I shakily placed the cuff upon his ear. The silver gleamed and the rose shone prominently. Ozren took the smaller one, kissing me before he placed it upon my ear. He tucked my hair back, gazing at it with a content smile upon his face.

“It’s perfect,” he whispered.

I swallowed and smiled. “I’m glad.”

Ozren kissed me again, holding my cheek in his strong hand. A low growl rumbled in his chest, one I recognized all too well.

“Are you getting hard?” I whispered.

“Hush,” he growled.

I bit back my smile, feeling a bit of that wine still lingering. “Can I see it?”

Ozren gave me a stunned look I’d never seen before. “What’s gotten over you, my Rose? Surely that isn’t the wine talking.”

I turned my head and licked his thumb. “I like your cock.” Perhaps the wine was helping, but it was me doing all the talking. I was surprised with myself, but so proud of myself as well.

Ozren’s thumb hooked into my mouth and I sucked on it. His eyes glazed over and his breathing became deep and even. “You can’t just say things like that to me, Rose. You drive me wild enough as it is.” He warned me as he leaned closer. The cuff on his ear caught the light, and the rose on it seemed to glow.

I lapped my tongue over his thumb and met his gaze. “I like your big, thick cock. I like the curve of it. I like the shade of green it is. I like the orc it’s attached to.” This would have been impossible for me to say months ago, now it felt so easy. Being with Ozren made it easy.

Ozren was frowning, but the look in his eyes I knew as pure lust and desire. “Rose-” He growled it as a warning.

I kissed his palm and wrist then looked into his eyes with intent. “I want to suck your cock,” I said boldly.

He choked back a moan and took a step back from me. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you. But we should wait until we get home for this sort of talk.”

“Please?” I pouted. I tried my best puppy eyes. Sticking my lip out just a little. Batting my eyelashes.

Ozren looked towards the door, wiping his hand down his face as he weighed all his options. He stared at me, studying my face and body before he sank down to kiss me. He held me close, sighing with relief as our bodies touched. I wrapped my arms around his neck to better reach him, moaning against his lips until he pushed me back.

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Do you?” I challenged.

Ozren swallowed, his neck going taut. “I’d be mad to say no. But… I really should hold myself back.”

“Just a little. I promise.” I had him sit back in his chair and I knelt down before him. I could see the bulge inside his pants and grew very excited. I opened his belt and tugged down his pants. His cock popped out and struck my chin, making me bite my tongue.

“Careful,” Ozren whispered.

His length bobbed before me and I kissed the tip while taking him into my hand. I opened my mouth, taking the tip to suck upon.

Above me Ozren moaned and cleared his throat. He kept glancing towards the door, but the more I touched the less he paid any mind to it. He cupped the back of my head, whispering my name softly as my warm mouth wrapped around him. He was so big, so much, my hands joined in to pleasure him.

I felt Ozren tug on my hair and I looked up into his heady eyes. “I like making you feel good.”

Ozren’s eyes glinted and he licked the side of his tusk. “Then get up,” he ordered in a hard voice.

I hesitantly stood from the floor and Ozren put me upon his desk. He pulled my legs forward and removed the warm underclothing. He hiked up my skirt and spread my legs wider, seeing me below.

“Nothing feels better than being inside you, Rose.” He pulled me forward a bit more and pressed himself against me. “You’re my mate.”

I put my arms around him, holding my breath for the moment he would be inside me.

“You’re mine.” Ozren pushed inside, holding himself there a moment before he began to move. He grunted and moaned into my ear while all I could do was breathe deeply. My fingers clasping his hair desperately. My fingernails scratching him over his firm shoulders.

“I’m going to go fast so we can get home,” he whispered to me. He laid me back against the desk. “Hold onto me and use my shoulder to keep yourself quiet.”

“Okay.” I don’t know why that made me tingle all over. Perhaps it was the excitement or where we were, but I was very allured by it. Either way i wanted it. All of it.

Ozren pressed deep inside of me, growling low before he pulled back again, thrusting as hard as he could and never stopped. I was blown back, gasping for breath and whining against his shoulder. There was no time to think or worry about anything. Ozren had been holding back on me. He had this power all this time and he had been hiding it from me. His balls slapping hard against me while i just clung for life.

“A little more,” he snarled. “A little more!” his huffs fluttering over my skin.

I kept my face buried against his shoulder, afraid someone might hear us if I moved an inch. Wimpers built in my throat but i kept them at bay while  I held onto him, grabbing tighter as I felt that warm rush creep up from my toes and into my belly.

“Oh god, Rose! Rose!” Ozren drove harder and harder. My body arched off the table, and I cried into his shoulder. More. More. Just alittle bit more. I could feel that coil inside me start to tighten. Just a bit. More. I gasped as i felt my release wash over me. Everything became white and warm and deep inside me Ozren throbbed.

I laid back against the table and the light from the windows was hazy and extra bright. Ozren shuddered as he moved. His hips twitching with those last few pumps. He kissed me slowly, brushing my hair aside.

“I love you,” he breathed.

I trembled and couldn’t look at him.

“Strange time to say it, I’m sorry. But I can’t hold it in anymore. I love you, my Rose. My Rue,” he whispered. “Once we’re home I’ll do better at saying it.”

My heart ached. “You’re saying it just fine now,” I sniffled.

He chuckled and pulled away, examining what he did to me before helping me to sit up. “This is just a heated moment. I haven’t properly thanked you for the mating cuff or how wonderfully sweet you are. This isn’t the best of what I can do.”

I was still flustered from it all, and although I may not have a deep knowledge of such things, it was still good. I couldn’t help but giggle. “Are you sure? That was pretty well done.”

Ozren chuckled. “It’s different from the lovemaking I know you prefer, my Rose.” His smile was so bright I could barely look at it. He leaned in, kissing my cheek as he smoothed down my skirt. “I love you, Rue.”

It was bubbling up inside me, I could feel it coming, but even then the fear I had kept it down. “You’re so wonderful,” I sniffled. “I don’t deserve you.”

Ozren smoothed his hand over my cheek.“Yes you do. My love, I am yours. You’ll have to get used to that.”

“I know.” I whimpered pathetically. “I’ve never loved someone like this before.”

And there it was.

His eyes widened and his body went tight. “I dare you to say that again,” he said as though all air had left his being.

It was so easy! Just like that? I said it without a thought even though I felt so much anxiety over it. I wasn’t sure I could say it again.  “You heard me.”

Ozren gripped my face between his large, warm hands. “I heard you as loud as thunder, my love. But I need you to say it again, a hundred times if possible.”

I laughed softly. “Not a hundred! But… maybe once.” The fear was bubbling like acid in my throat, but as I looked into his beautiful, dark eyes it didn’t matter. “I love you, Ozren.”

There was triumph in his eyes, joy beyond what I thought I knew. He leapt up once, cheering loudly, then came back down to earth to wrap me up in strong arms and excited kisses.

“I knew you’d say it one day! I just had to wait!” There were tears in his eyes which made me well up too. “I love you so much!”

I couldn’t hold onto it anymore. It was there at the surface, and nothing could push it back down. “I love you.” It was such a huge relief to say it.

Ozren pressed me back down upon the desk, kissing me over and over until I felt something poke into my belly. “Ozren, you’re-”

“Aye. Sorry love, I got excited all over again.” He laughed and rose back up. “Can’t blame the bastard for wanting to celebrate the occasion, too.”

I smiled shyly, giggling as Ozren came back down for more kisses. “Maybe we should go home and celebrate.” How was it possible this man was all mine?

“Aye, you’re right.” Ozren helped me up and to gather my clothing. “I’m surprised by how far we got here. I’ll have to clean up tomorrow.”

“I can help before we leave,” I said.

Ozren shook his head, grinning down at me. “No, I want to get home fast. I want to bathe you in kisses and hear you whisper those three words to me over and over. I don’t want to waste a moment cleaning up.” He took hold of my hand and squeezed it tight.

I nodded shyly, clutching his hand back until my fingers laced together. As we walked out into the sun, he kissed the top of my head.

“I love you, Rue.”

I smiled, almost near tears again. “I love you, Ozren.”

I had never said those words to anyone before, but I didn’t feel afraid like I thought I would. With Ozren it was easy, it was natural. I didn’t have to think, it just existed inside me. I loved him and I was happy.