Zashiki Warashi (complete)

    The old house was in need of much love and repair. No one had lived there since your grandparents had died. You had inherited it after you married your wife. You had always planned on moving here with her, wanting to raise your daughter in Japan like you both had been. 

    The yard is overgrown, and you have some difficulty getting to the front door. Once you do, even after you unlock the door, you have to pry it open, chipping away at layers of dirt, vines, and water damage. The door wrenches open, and you fall backward, plopping down into the overgrown grass and bushes.

    You huff, laying there on the ground and staring up at the sky. It was cloudless and empty. You sigh, turning your head and looking under the porch you see a set of eyes glowing. You sit up in fright and scramble back onto the porch. You stay there for a moment before peeking back underneath. You see nothing. 

    “Trick of the light,” you grumble to yourself. 

    You go inside, looking around and seeing all the dust, the sheet-covered furniture, the water damage on the ceiling. You’d have to get that fixed, you’d have to see what damage was caused. You walk around the house, remembering things from when you were a young boy. Growing up, you spent much time here.

Your grandmother had been a teacher, and after she got married, she held after school classes for the local kids. She helped them with homework, helped them study for tests, anything she could do to help. There were always kids in this house. When she died, you had been living in America. You received word from a friend who showed you pictures of all the kids she helped in her lifetime. The house had been so full of flowers and well wishes you could barely get through the halls.

    You sit down in an empty room, resting your back against the wall. You sigh, staring out the foggy window across the room. You close your eyes, taking in a few deep breaths as the silence surrounds you. 

    “Hello?” You hear a voice ring out. “Hello?”

    You stand up and walk back out into the hallway. You see a massive figure walking in, and you sigh. “Oh, hello Hiro.”

    The large Onikuma had been a friend of yours growing up. He had been one of your grandmother’s students as well.

    “I thought I saw you come in,” he says.

    “What are you doing here?” You ask. “I thought you had gone to the states too.”

    Hiro greets you with a firm handshake. “I’ve got the family here visiting. Grandmother doesn’t have much time left, so I want to be with her as much as possible.”

    You look away for a moment, glancing around the house.

    “I heard about what happened,” Hiro murmurs. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

    You shrug and remain silent. “I’ve got this place now,” you murmur. “All I need to do is fix it up. Maybe I’ll sell it, maybe I’ll stay.”

    Hiro sighs. “If you need anything-”

    You hold your hand up to stop him. “You don’t need to say it. Enjoy time with your family. I’ll do what I have to do here.”

    Hiro frowns and nods his head. “You know where to find me. I’m in the same place as I was before.” He points out the door. 

    You nod and turn your back to him. “Yeah. I remember.”

    Hiro leaves, and you rub at your eyes. You start cleaning, first with the kitchen. You make sure everything still works and is safe. After cutting on the electricity, you were half expecting a fire to take everything over.

    After cleaning the kitchen, you mop the hallway and dust. You clean out a spare room which you set up a sleeping bag in. You would sleep here until you got everything ready and could move in for the time being. 

    That evening, after an exhausting day, you take your bike and peddle down to the convenience store. The place hasn’t changed at all since you were kid. It’s all the same. It even somehow smells the same. You buy your meal there, getting some bottled water as well until you could get the well fixed at the house.

    Once back, you sit outside on the porch eating. The dim glow of the streetlamps makes you feel uncomfortable. You can almost smell smoke, and the back of your neck starts to burn. You close your eyes, and something touches your leg.

    You look down, seeing a small red ball next to you. Picking it up, you look it over. You look around yourself, down the porch and out into the yard. 

    “What the hell?” You whisper. You look the ball over then stand up and chuck it across the yard. It bounces across the street, landing in your neighbor’s backyard. You just assume some kid was playing here and left it before you got here.

    You go back inside and lay down on the sleeping bag. The house is dark and quiet. It smells like a mix of stale dust and bleach. You sigh, closing your eyes.

    You hear a pitter patter. Like tiny feet running down the hallway. You frown as you think about all the wild animals living in the roof. You hear the pitter patter again, this time it’s much faster and way louder than before.

    You squeeze your eyes shut as the running sounds like it’s right outside your door. That’s when you hear the door open.

    You sit up, staring across the room. The door is open, but you see nothing. You get up and slam the door shut, going back to the sleeping bag and slamming a pillow down over your head. 

    You wake up in the morning, hearing giggling and laughing. Your stomach churns, and you sit up. 

    “Mama! No!” You hear a child laugh loudly.

    You rush to the door, throwing it open and staring down the hall. Your heart is racing, and you feel a mix of dread and excitement. You hear the laughter again, and when you go into the kitchen, you see Hiro and his family there.

    “Did we scare you?” His wife asks.

    You shoulders slouch, and you groan. “Yeah. Kind of.” You run your palm down your face.

    “Hiro was worried about you,” his wife says as she comes to you. “Considering your door fell off the hinges, he wanted to make sure you were ok.”

    “The door?” You frown. “It was fine it was-” you shake your head, remembering the sound of running last night. “Never mind. It makes sense.”

    Hiro turns from the stove. “Everything alright?” He asks.

    You glare down at the floor then turn, seeing two cubs sitting at the table. They’re happily chugging their juice bottles and smashing banana slices into their faces. 

    “These yours?” You point to the twins.

    Hiro looks at them. “No. I just happened to find them.”

    His wife shakes her head. “I’m Lorelei,” she says. “Hiro has told me all about you.” She touches your arm and gives you that look of pity you hate. “And these two are Kumiko and Kotaro.”

    You walk over to the table as the two cubs look up at you with wide eyes. “Very nice to meet you two,” you murmur. “How old are you?”

    Kumiko lifts her paw up, spread out all five fingers. “This many.”

    Kotaro looks at his paws and nods in agreement. 

    “Five, wow,” you mumble and step back. “That’s how old-” you clear your throat and turn to Hiro. “So you broke in to feed me?” You ask.

    “If you want to call it that.” Hiro offers you a plate of food. “Like I said, I was worried. You didn’t seem quite right yesterday.”

    “I suppose,” you mutter, taking a seat beside Kumiko at the table.

    You eat silently as the rest of the family talks and prattles on. You feel like a ghost between there, somehow there and yet not there at all. You’re like the odd plate that doesn’t match any of the others. Your set is gone, destroyed and you are left as a placeholder.

    Lorelei and Hiro stay over even after breakfast. They help you get the rest of the house cleaned up as well as taking care of the lawn. Hiro mows while Lorelei sweeps, dusts, and mops. 

    “This is a lovely place,” Lorelei murmurs. 

    “The old ones usually are,” you sigh.

    Lorelei gives you that look again. “Hiro mentions you quite a bit. He talks about how your grandmother really inspired him. He said that if your family hadn’t of-” 

    You stop her, raising your hand and giving her a half-hearted smile. “It’s ok,” I whisper. “These things happen.”

    Lorelei frowns. “These things don’t just happen,” she says. “These things are-”

    “Mama!” Kumiko and Kotaro come running into the room. “Look!” Kumiko holds up the red ball, and you glare at it.

    Lorelei kneels down. “Oh, what’s this?”

    “The girl gave it to us!” Kotaro chimes.

    Your insides wrench and grow cold.

    Lorelei furrows her brow. “The girl?”

    The twins nod in unison. “She gave us this ball. She said we could play here whenever we wanted.”

    Lorelei glances up at me, and I look away, heading towards the next room. 

    “What little girl are you talking about?” Lorelei murmurs.

    “She was wearing a red kimono,” Kumiko speaks as if we should know what we’re talking about.

    Lorelei sighs. “There’s no little girl here,” she coaxes them. “I don’t know who you saw, but she doesn’t live here.”

    “She said her dad owned the place,” Kotaro murmurs.

    You close your eyes and taking a sputtering breath. You cover your hand over your mouth as tears start to pour from your eyes. You take a deep breath and claw at your face. It takes you a moment to stop the tears, and by the time you do, you know Lorelei and Hiro will see it. You storm out of the room and go outside, getting onto your bike.

    “Where are you going?” Hiro asks.

    “To the market,” you call to him. “I’ll be back I’m going to buy you lunch.” You drive away before Hiro can say anything else.

    At the store, you buy yourself a drink and sit outside. You watch the sky, seeing clouds start to move into view. You sniffle, rubbing your eyes and wiping your face. 

You couldn’t help but linger on the words that Kumiko and Kotaro were saying. There was no little girl in the house. There would never be a little girl in the house. The little girl was gone. She would never come back. She would never get to share the house with you. That little girl was taken from you. Your heart was gone with her.

    You go back to the house, seeing the cleaned up yard that Hiro worked on. Inside, you see Kumiko and Kotaro asleep in the sunlight. Kotaro is holding the red ball. You take it from him and using your pocket knife you slice into it. You toss the scraps into the trash bin before going into the kitchen.

    “I have the food,” you say.

    Lorelei comes in, wiping her brow with a cloth. “Hiro has the water working,” she announces with a grin.

    “That’s great,” you murmur as you set the food out on the table.

Hiro and Lorelei leave that evening, just after dinner. Hiro carries the twins in his arms, both of them exhausted. They spent most of the afternoon searching for the red ball as well as the little girl. 

You close the door, having fixed it just a moment ago. You walk back inside, and from the corner of your eye, you see something running. You turn and watch the doorway. You step towards it and hear a small giggle.

You jump back and frown. You go into the room, but all you see is the mop and bucket and a stack of cleaning supplies. You walk into the room and as you do the door slams behind your back. As you panic, you hear footsteps runnings away.

“What the fuck?” You roar, throwing open the door and looking down both ends of the hallway. You step out of the room, standing there as you realize the house is silent. You sigh, closing your eyes and rubbing your face. 

You go to bed, and as you lay there, you hear something that sounds like rustling paper. You hear a hushed voice and the sound of crayon on paper. You sit up, looking around, the house is silent again. You lay back down, and the rustling of paper continues. You use your pillow to cover your ears, and you force yourself into a restless sleep.

Come morning, you wake up and spots of white powder on the floor. On closer inspection, the spots look like small footprints. They lead from the side of your sleeping bag and out into the hallway. You see a box of powdered detergent by the front door that has been tipped over. Several paths of footprints lead from it, going around the house and leading back to you.

“I can’t take this,” you growl to yourself. 

You leave the footprints and go outside. There, right in the middle of the yard, is a small red ball. Behind you, you hear giggling. You turn and see there are new footprints at the door. You look back outside, seeing footprints going along the porch.

“What’s happening?” You growl and close the door. You stand there, feeling trapped. Whatever was in your house, you didn’t like the game it was playing. In fact, you hated it.

The pitter patter of feet, the sounds it made, it all made you remember, and you didn’t want to remember. You sit there, covering your head with your hands. You feel the heat at the back of your neck, it prickles and stings. 

You hear bouncing, the soft dull thud of hollow rubber. You look up, seeing the red ball bouncing towards you. It lands at your feet, and you hear a soft laugh.

“Stop it!” You roar. “Stop!” You kick the ball hard, sending it bouncing back and forth and all around in the small hallway. “I can’t take it! I don’t want it!” You fall to your knees, kneeling on the ground. “Just stop!”

“Don’t cry,” a small voice whispers. “Please.” You feel something touch your hair, but when you lift your head, you don’t see anything.

You leave the house, rushing outside in just your sleepwear. You get on your bike and drive away. You go through a clearing in the woods, taking the small path down to a pond where you and your friends used to hang out at as kids. You stand on the shore, staring out over the water. It’s covered by vines and lilypads, making it look like you could walk across the surface.

You sit down, laying your legs in the water. Long ago, back when you were very small, your grandfather used to tell you stories. He told you about the zashiki warashi, a little spirit that brought good luck to the house. He told you that, once he married your grandmother, one appeared in their home. 

“Just because it is a spirit does not mean it is bad,” he told you. “Ghosts aren’t always evil. Sometimes they are sad. Sometimes they want to visit. I think, there are even spirits who want to look after us,” he said with a smile. “When there are people with so much love to give, I think it wants to stick around. That is what I always thought the zashiki warashi were. People who died with still so much love inside them. So they pass it to others who may need it. They come into homes as a blessing.”

You close your eyes and sniffle, rubbing away the tears as they come. Your wife and daughter had been your blessing. They had been the most amazing things to come into your life. Your daughter especially. She had been born in the middle of a thunderstorm, so you had named her Amaya. Although, now, it felt like a name you had meant as a remembrance of her birth was actually a curse.

You were driving home late one evening after going to the movies. It was Amaya’s first time at the theatre, and she was asleep in the back seat. It was raining, and the roads were slick. You wife was beside you, her eyes watching the streetlamps at the passed. You’re looking at Amaya in the rearview mirror, admiring how red and plump her cheeks were. You then hear your wife gasp, and you look down, only seeing the glare of headlights in front of you.

You swerved, and the car spins, hitting the front of the car before you and then crashing into a lamp post. Another car strikes you, and you wake up later in a hospital. The news that greets you when you wake up nearly kills you. You tried to die, but you were placed under a severe watch. You left the hospital, never even going back home, you came to Japan to take over your grandparents place.

As you sit at the pond, it begins to rain. It starts light, a drip here or there. It turns into a fine mist, and you get up to leave. You go back to the house right as it becomes a massive downpour. The footprints on the porch are washed away. You go inside, seeing the footprints there are gone as well.

You walk inside, dripping on the floor. You hear the bouncing of a ball, and when you stoop to pick it up, you see a little girl standing at the end of the hallway.

You stare at her. Her hair is cut into a blunt bob with bangs. She’s wearing a bright red kimono with a cute pattern on it. Her cheeks are plump and red.

“Throw it back!” She holds her tiny hands out. 

You stare, expecting the vision to disappear. “Are you real?” You whisper at her.

The girl lowers her hands and lifts her head. Her bangs move away from her round, black eyes. Your sob catches in your throat. The face of the little spirit is that of your daughter.

She smiles at you, tilting her head to one side. “Don’t cry.”

You sob, falling to your knees on the ground. You clutch the red ball in your arms. Outside the storm rages. You hear thunder and the rain patters against the glass.

You feel the tiny hand in your hair, and you look up. Before you, you see a trail of paper. Each piece has a small drawing on it. One is of the house. The next one shows you on your bike. Another is Kumiko and Kotaro playing with the red ball.

You follow the trail of drawings into the small room across from yours. Inside before, there had been the mop and a bucket, cleaning supplies and a few storage bins. Now, you stare into a neatly decorated room. The floor is tatami mats, and there is a chest full of toys to one side. In the other, there is a table that has drawing paper scattered over it, and a box of crayons tipped over. 

You step inside, and Amaya grabs your hand. She takes the red ball from you and runs across the room.

“Catch it!” She tosses the ball up in the air, and you stoop to grab it. Amaya giggles and claps her hands excitedly. “Throw it back!”

You gently toss the ball and Amaya bounces to get it. She giggles happily, clutching the ball to her chest. Her smile is so big and perfect it breaks your heart. Tears roll down your cheeks, and you kneel onto the floor.

Amaya walks up to you and pats the back of your head. Her tiny hand strokes your hair, and she kneels down before you. “It’s ok, Daddy,” she says. “I’m going to take care of you.”

You look up at her beautiful face as tears falls. You blink, letting them splatter on the ground. You reach out, wanting to touch her but you recoil your hands back. “I love you so much,” you whisper. “I couldn’t protect you.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Amaya murmurs.

“I don’t-” your voice chokes. “I don’t want you to worry about me.”

She tilts her head. “Why not?”

You smile sadly at her, taking her hands into yours. “It isn’t your job to worry, baby,” you tell her. “I miss you so much I can’t stand it most days,” you cry. “But your place isn’t here anymore.”

“Daddy,” she whispers.

“You belong with your mother,” you tell her. “I don’t want you worrying about me. Ok?” You squeeze her hand. “I am not being a good father if you’re worrying about me.”

Amaya tucks her chin in and sniffles. “You are though.”

You pull her into your arms, feeling only like you’re only hugging an empty coat. “I want to keep you here more than anything. But it isn’t fair to ask that.”

She puts her arms around your neck. “I want to stay though.”

“No, baby,” you cry. 

Amaya sets her feet back down on the ground and looks up at you. “Can we play?” She asks. “One more time?”

You smile at her and nod. “Of course.”

You sit down with her, playing with the red ball then going over and drawing with her. She colors images you sketch, and she even draws you a few new pictures. You read to her, finding old story books in the chest at the far end of the room. 

Outside the storm is still going, the rain begins to patter slowly, and Amaya looks up at you with wide eyes.

“Are you having fun?” She asks you.

You beam at her, nodding. “Of course I am. Are you having fun?”

She stands up, taking your hand and leading you to your room. “Let’s nap now, Daddy.” She lays down and pats the sleeping bag.

You join her and lay down, letting her hug you as you drift to sleep.

You wake up, hearing the sound of gentle rain outside your window. You look for Amaya, finding only the little red ball in your arms. You sit up, staring at it as you cup it in your hands. 

You hear a knocking at the door and get up, going to answer it you see Lorelei and the twins at the door. Lorelei is holding an umbrella while the twins are carrying a bag between them.

“We brought you something to eat,” Lorelei says.

The twins hold up the bag, and you take it. “Thank you,” you murmur.

Lorelei beams at you. “Is everything ok?” She asks. She looks up at the ceiling. Did you get the roof fixed already?

You follow her gaze, seeing that the water damage is gone. “Oh,” you whisper. “Uhm...yeah,” you say with surprise.

“Did you find the ball?” Kumiko asks.

“Kumiko,” Lorelei whispers.

You kneel down, looking into the two chubby faces of the cubs. You smile and hold out the red ball to them. “Go ahead and take it,” you tell them. “As long as you promise to come over and play with me once the rain stops.”

Kotaro takes the ball, and Kumiko puts her arms around you, giving you a great big squeeze. “Thank you!” She giggles.

You hug her back, a smile spreading across your face. “Anytime, young lady.”

Kumiko looks back to her mother then you. “Bye!” She says as they leave.

You smile to yourself, watching as the cubs leave. You feel better, somehow much less cumbersome. You turn around and see footprints of detergent powder on the floor. You grin, realizing Amaya never got to finish playing with the twins.