Pokémon: My Titles Know No Limits! [480]

Looking at Diamond dozing off atop "Toilet King" (Regigigas), August could only sigh and think, This is just so typically Diamond.

Eventually, it was Pearl who came to the rescue, sending out Chatot to repeatedly peck Diamond awake.

Only after finally fending off the persistent reporters did Pearl breathe a sigh of relief.

Turning around, he saw Diamond still grinning foolishly to himself.

"What exactly are you smiling about?"

"We’re famous now!" Diamond beamed happily.

"You idiot, we’re famous as Pokémon trainers, not comedians," Pearl sighed.

"Is there a difference?" Diamond scratched his head.

Pearl started to reply, "Of course there's—" but stopped short, struck by a sudden realization. If they became famous trainers, wouldn’t more people come to see their comedy performances as well?

Pearl’s imagination ran wild, opening up an entirely new world of possibilities.

...

Diamond’s unexpected upset victory against Ash not only shocked the media and spectators—it even stunned everyone back at the Kanto Division.

"Diamond, where did you even catch Regigigas?" Gary asked the question that was on everyone’s mind.

Under the intense stares, Diamond scratched his head sheepishly. "Actually...I’m not really sure myself!"

"...?"

How could you possibly not remember where you caught a Pokémon as massive as Regigigas?

Seeing everyone’s skeptical "are you joking?" expressions, Diamond hurriedly explained:

"I found Regi when I was sorting through my backpack the other day. He was inside a Poké Ball I didn’t even recognize—I genuinely don’t remember ever capturing him."

Hearing this, everyone became even more incredulous.

Yet August found Diamond’s explanation quite believable. After all, in the original storyline, Regigigas had mysteriously appeared in Platinum’s bag, intervening dramatically at Spear Pillar to help Diamond restrain Dialga and Palkia, ultimately becoming Diamond’s Pokémon.

As for why Regigigas would suddenly show up in Diamond’s bag now...

August suspected it was partly Regigigas’s own will, and partly the influence of Arceus.

If destiny truly existed in this world, then Arceus was undoubtedly the puppet-master behind the scenes.

But regardless of how it happened, this was undeniably a huge boost for the Kanto Division!

"Pearl, do your best in tomorrow’s match too," August encouraged, patting Pearl’s shoulder.

Pearl: "..."

How could he possibly stand a chance against Regigigas?

Well, losing to Diamond wasn't exactly unacceptable, either.

Still, Diamond’s acquisition of Regigigas had ignited a sense of urgency among the rest of the Kanto Division. Now that three members had legendary Pokémon, the others felt they couldn't afford to lag behind.

After rallying everyone’s spirits, August made his way to Lance’s office.

As soon as he entered, Lance immediately fixed him with an accusing stare, making August feel oddly uncomfortable.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"My newly upgraded arena defense system..." Lance said bitterly.

He’d paid an exorbitant price to import state-of-the-art defensive technology from the Galar Region after the Wailord incident. Yet, just a few matches later, it was completely wrecked again.

"Hey, look on the bright side," August said encouragingly. "At least it actually did its job this time, right?"

Lance sighed deeply.

He knew it wasn't really anyone’s fault. Who could’ve anticipated that one of August’s subordinates would suddenly pull out a legendary Pokémon?

Regigigas’s unexpected appearance...could it signal some impending disaster?

Lance fell deep into thought.

August had no idea what Lance was worrying about, or he’d surely mock him for being paranoid.

With Arceus around, what was there to fear?

After arresting Giovanni, Volo, and all the other major villains, there wasn’t really anyone left capable of threatening Arceus anymore.

Even Lance seemed to realize his fears were baseless.

August had captured numerous legendary Pokémon by now, and yet the world was still perfectly fine, wasn't it?

"What did you come here for?" Lance finally asked.

"Just letting you know I'm heading back to Kanto," August replied casually.

"So soon? You’re not watching the rest of the tournament?" Lance was surprised.

"No point—the outcome’s already decided," August said matter-of-factly.

The champion was unquestionably Diamond, the runner-up Pearl, and Ash, though defeated by Diamond, was guaranteed third place. Staying any longer seemed pointless.

Besides...

"Lysandre is still locked up in Kalos League custody," August explained. "I need to hurry back and transfer him to my own custody before the Kalos League tries to strike some deal and lets him out. Otherwise, all my effort would’ve been for nothing."

Lance nodded approvingly, fully agreeing with August’s reasoning.

As a Champion, Lance understood the League Council’s moral flexibility all too well—they had absolutely no shame. Given Lysandre’s value, the Kalos Council was entirely capable of cutting him a generous deal.

It was best to securely handle such dangerous criminals right away.

"Do you need me to arrange a flight for you?" Lance offered.

"You should probably save your budget to fix the arena defenses..." August waved off casually. Under Lance’s gloomy stare, August vanished instantly on the spot.

...

International Police Kanto Division | Saffron City

"Ah, finally home! It’s been a while!" August took a deep breath, savoring the familiar scent of home.

The welcoming Indeedee weren’t surprised by August’s theatrics anymore. However, they did seem curious why August was alone.

"The others wanted to watch the final match first before coming back," August explained.

Entering the villa, the first to rush into his arms was Eevee.

"Eevee!" she chirped affectionately, snuggling her fluffy head against August.

Clearly, Eevee had missed him a great deal.

Cogita was elegantly seated on the sofa, closing her book gracefully. "Eevee has missed you quite a bit."

Hearing Cogita, Eevee nodded eagerly.

August felt a wave of warmth at this, contemplating how best to reward Eevee—

Then Cogita calmly continued, "She kept complaining that if you didn’t hurry home and give her allowance, she wouldn’t be able to renew her ‘Captain’ subscription to Iono’s channel."

"By the way, what's this 'Captain' subscription she keeps mentioning?" Cogita asked curiously.

The warm feeling in August’s heart instantly vanished, replaced by exasperation as he glared at Eevee.

So that's what you missed? Really?

Seeing August’s stern expression, Eevee immediately sensed trouble, clinging desperately to his clothes and letting out pitiful cries.

"Too late!" August said mercilessly. "Your allowance for this month is cancelled!"

Eevee froze, struck as if by lightning.

Cogita smiled lightly, thoroughly amused by this interaction.

Ignoring Eevee’s pitiful pleading, August released Meowstic and Hoopa from their Poké Balls.

Introducing Meowstic to the Indeedee, August announced: "Meowstic will be our Kanto Division’s barista from now on. Indeedee, please show Meowstic around the place."

Indeedee and Meowstic eyed each other curiously, eager to get acquainted.

Meanwhile, Hoopa stared hungrily at the donuts on the table in front of Cogita. But the moment Hoopa met Cogita’s gaze, it shrank back fearfully, hiding immediately behind August.

Clearly, Hoopa recognized exactly who Cogita was.

"If you want some donuts, please help yourself," Cogita said gently, smiling warmly.

Hoopa hesitated, but upon seeing Cogita’s smile, nervously shook its head. "H-Hoopa isn't hungry!"

Seeing Hoopa’s anxious state, August wondered whether it was traumatized from when he had summoned Arceus to punish Hoopa, or perhaps from an earlier incident involving Arceus.

Most likely the latter—knowing Hoopa’s personality, it had probably tried stealing something from Arceus in the past, only to receive a harsh lesson.

Deciding to have some fun himself, August encouraged, "Cogita offered you some donuts. Go ahead and eat!"

He gently nudged Hoopa closer, while Cogita moved the donut plate invitingly toward it.

Under their encouraging gazes, Hoopa gingerly picked up a donut and cautiously took a bite. Seeing no sudden changes in their expressions, Hoopa finally relaxed.

It wasn’t a trap!

Just as Hoopa prepared to fully indulge, August spoke up in mock surprise, "Wow, you actually dared to eat it!"

Hoopa froze instantly.

"Pfft!" Cogita and August burst out laughing simultaneously.

Realizing it had been tricked again, Hoopa sulked furiously as it devoured the remaining donuts, reluctantly forgiving August only after finishing them all.

"Hoopa, open a portal to Kalos for me," August finally said.

Hoopa tossed out a golden ring. Passing through, August found himself in a conference room where Diantha and several others were staring at him.

"Hello again, Diantha!" August waved cheerfully.

Caught off guard, Diantha reflexively waved back. It took her a moment to process.

"August, why are you—?"

"Oh, nothing much, just here to take Lysandre off your hands. Seems Hoopa got the location slightly off. Am I interrupting something...? And who are these gentlemen?" August looked around curiously.

"They’re from the Kalos League Council—"

"No need to thank me about Lysandre," August cut in smoothly. "Capturing him was my duty. Now, dealing with his remnants is up to you."

The council members swallowed their protests, wary of angering the International Police.

Returning home with Lysandre went smoothly. August later received a relieved message from Diantha:

[Thank goodness you showed up. The council was seriously considering reducing Lysandre’s sentence!]

August replied dryly, [Typical. Don’t worry about it.]

Taking Lysandre down to the prison basement, August cheerfully announced, "New inmate incoming!"

Archie and Maxie perked up instantly.

Even Giovanni stared at Lysandre in quiet disbelief. If August had already captured Lysandre, Giovanni’s last hopes had vanished completely.

Glancing at Giovanni, August grinned broadly:

"I have great news, Giovanni. Your beloved Team Rocket still survives outside!"

"Who?" Giovanni asked skeptically.

August smiled brighter.

"Jessie, James, and Meowth! Isn’t that exciting?"

Giovanni fell silent, utterly defeated.

Finally, in quiet despair, he muttered:

"Just kill me already."

How profound the despair, to drive Giovanni—ever defiant—to such words!

Welcome to the continuing adventures of the Team Rocket Trio!

Although Giovanni didn't yell or visibly lose control, August could clearly see from the utterly defeated look in Giovanni's eyes that this time, he had genuinely reached his breaking point.

This was Giovanni—a man who had stared down an ambush from Legendary Pokémon without even blinking—completely losing composure because of Jessie, James, and Meowth.

One could only conclude that Giovanni understood those three all too well.

Returning to the Kanto Division after watching the final tournament, Blue couldn’t help but ask upon hearing August’s plan, "August, are you seriously planning on letting those three go free?"

"Of course!" August replied with a cheerful smile. "The world just wouldn’t be the same without them."

After all, he genuinely believed those three were the true main characters of the Pokémon world.

Blue opened her mouth, seemingly about to say something more, but decided against it.

Finally, she just sighed. "Well, as long as you’re happy."

Of course August was happy—not just a little, but tremendously so.

However, before bringing back the infamous trio, he had some preparations to make.

---

Hisui Region

It had been seven long weekends since Jessie, James, and Meowth had finished their assigned mission, stranded in Hisui.

Inside a gloomy cave, the trio sat in a circle around a flickering campfire, staring blankly at the dancing flames.

"Hey," James broke the silence hesitantly. "Do you think maybe…the Boss forgot about us?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, Jessie’s fist and Meowth’s claws simultaneously slammed down on his head.

"You idiot! Don’t say things like that!" Jessie scolded angrily.

"That’s right, the Boss would never abandon us, nya!" Meowth agreed fervently.

"Fine, fine! But did you have to hit me?" James complained, rubbing his aching head.

The cave fell quiet once more, but James’s words lingered heavily in their minds.

Did the Boss really forget us? Why else wouldn’t he have brought us home by now?

As they sank deeper into these troubling thoughts, suddenly a sharp notification chime echoed through the cave.

The trio instantly sprang to life, excitement surging through them as they crowded around the phone, eyes wide.

A single message displayed clearly on the screen:

[This is Giovanni. I've been captured by the International Police and am sending this emergency message! I urgently need three elite Rocket members to rebuild Team Rocket! Simply sacrifice 1,000 bottle caps to unlock Team Rocket’s hidden account and rebuild our organization. Rescue me, and when I reclaim leadership, I promise to make you second-in-command! Reply ‘T’ to unsubscribe.]

The trio stared blankly at the message for several seconds.

Then, Jessie and Meowth’s eyes slowly shifted toward James.

James felt panic rising in his chest. "W-why are you looking at me like that?"

Jessie’s voice became unusually gentle, almost sickeningly sweet. "James… If I recall correctly, haven’t you been collecting bottle caps all this time…?"

James instinctively grabbed his pockets defensively.

Meowth brandished his sharp claws threateningly. "Jessie, enough talk, nya! The Boss is waiting for our rescue!"

As Jessie and Meowth slowly advanced, James retreated until he was pressed tightly against the cave wall.

"W-wait, this is obviously a scam message!"

But Jessie and Meowth paid no attention, their eyes glowing menacingly red, like alpha Pokémon lurking outside the cave.

"The Boss is depending on us!"

"He won’t forget your noble sacrifice, nya!"

After a series of desperate pleas and pitiful screams, James sat defeated, nursing multiple bumps on his head as Jessie and Meowth victoriously claimed his precious, lifelong bottle cap collection.

Ignoring James’s sobbing, they huddled eagerly around the phone.

"‘Sacrifice’? Is it this button here?"

"Seems like we need to reply to the message first…"

After some chaotic fumbling, the phone suddenly emitted a dazzling golden glow.

Before their stunned eyes, a golden rift appeared, swallowing up the pile of bottle caps. Moments later, a far larger rift materialized in the cave itself, engulfing the three screaming Rockets entirely.

When the trio finally regained consciousness, they found themselves gazing in disbelief at the distant, familiar skyline of Saffron City.

"We’re finally home!"

Two humans and a Meowth hugged each other, bursting into emotional tears.

Suddenly, James felt something unfamiliar in his pocket. Curious, he pulled it out—a bank card, accompanied by a small piece of paper with a PIN scribbled on it.

"What’s this…?"

Exchanging excited glances, they quickly logged into an app to check the account balance.

The next second, the trio fell into stunned silence.

"So many zeros…"

"We’re not dreaming, right?"

"Wait a minute—then that message was real? The Boss really has been captured and is counting on us to rebuild Team Rocket!?"

Hearing this, all three instantly straightened up, renewed determination filling their hearts. It was as if they’d finally found the meaning of their lives.

Boss Giovanni, just you wait! the trio vowed simultaneously, hearts blazing.

---

T/N: lets goooo!!!!

This is a fan translation of 我，宝可梦称号大师！ by 落唯 白良. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!