Dr. Lilith's Retreat Part 9: Judgement Day-Natalie's Hope

Hope is powerful.  Wielded effectively it can be the greatest of motivators, or the deadliest weapon.  Dr. Lilith was no stranger to the offensive capabilities of hope.  As she had advanced the science of her formula, she had also refined the techniques she used to control her subjects.  Everything was in service to her goal of global feminization.  Everything was a weapon against the patriarchy.  Even the hope of one captive sissy.  

Natalie sat with her legs crossed, despite how the position pinched her scrotum against the rigid cock-cage under her panties.  Ladies sat with their legs crossed, and the program demanded Natalie act like a lady, so she crossed her fishnet clad legs under her black and white maid outfit while she held a compact with one hand and scratched the dry cum off the corner of her mouth with the other before reapplying gloss to the dull finish, her bull’s cock had left on her lips.  

Like most straight men, Natalie was disgusted by sucking another man’s cock, but she had done it before and much worse for worse reasons as an addict on the streets.  If this is what it took to get clean and stay clean, then this was what she would do.  

One way or another, it was over now.  After a week of humiliating sissification, and a day full of mincing around on heels for the entertainment of the “sponsors” while demonstrating all manner of femininity, the day of their evaluation, their judgment day was over.  Now, all that was left was the judgment itself.  Would Natalie get to keep her cock, or would she wake up with a pussy tomorrow?  

She glanced up over her compact at the other sissies who had suffered the week with her.  Daisy, Britta, Josie, Tabitha, and Jessica all sat wide-kneed, their skirts splayed across the gap shifting uncomfortably while they waited.  Not one of them had the good sense to understand that even now, they were still being judged.  

Fools! 
Natalie wanted to grab them and shake them!  She wanted to shout “Get with the program!” Half of them just didn’t get it!  They had fought back, ignored the program and attempted rebellion!  Not Natalie though, after she was punished for sloppy nails and makeup the first day, she had understood what she needed to do and she had thrown herself into the task of sissification.  

Jessica and Daisy may have had the best over-all score going into today’s evaluation, Natalie knew she had made the most improvement!  When she had arrived this morning, her makeup was flawless, her nails were smudge free, her breast-forms firmly in place and her crimson red wig had been glued on with the lace will blended into her makeup.  With the exception of the unavoidable bulge visible in the bikini show, she was sure that of all the sissies, she was the most presentable of her class.  When the tests had begin, she did not hesitate with any of her tasks, as was evidenced by the cumstain she had just detected on her dress.  

She was scratching at the crusty dried spot over her left breast when the door opened and April stepped out.  “Natalie.” 

Natalie stood, smoothed her skirt, and was careful to keep her hands open, her hips swaying and her feet one in front of the other as she strolled with practiced skill on her high heels into the conference room.  As she passed through the door, it swung closed on it’s own behind her.  

At the head of the table, with her grey streaked, raven black hair pulled back into a severe pony tail, sat Dr. Katherine Lilith.  To her right was Miss Marcy, to her left was Mistress Stephanie.  April, May and June all sat in chairs against the wall.  Clearly they were consulted by only Dr. Lilith, Marcy and Stephanie had a vote.  

“Hello Natalie” Dr. Lilith said.  “You should know that whatever we decide in this meeting, your old life was closed off with the door behind you. You will never again be who you were before you came here.”  

Natalie swallowed hard.  They were going to take her cock away, still desperate for leniency, she managed to squawk out “Yes, Mistress” as she curtseyed, lifting at the hem of her skirt.  

Stephanie picked up.  “Natalie, you have done well this week!  If we kept the scoring going for another week I have no doubt that you would pass Jessica and Daisy in no time!  

“Thank you mistress!” This all sounded like a consolation speech, as if some platitudes would make up for his lost manhood.  Like every other addiction program Natalie had attended, they always finish up by lowering your expectations.  Here comes the but.  Natalie wondered if they would expect her to meekly walk to the operating room for her own emasculation.  At that point there would be nothing to lose, all the stored up rage and shame she had kept bottled up all week would burst forth and they would get to know who NATE was underneath Natalie’s shy submissive smile.  

Marcy went on. “Your performance in today’s evaluation had demonstrated that, of all the Sissies in your class, YOU have the shown the greatest improvement!” 

Natalie’s eyes widened.  She had thrown herself into the tasks, no matter how emasculating and humiliating they were, as evidenced by the crusty splotches she hadn’t yet been able to clean off her maid uniform. She had worried that they hadn’t noticed.  As sure as she had been that her way was the right way, she worried that it was all a waste.  If that were true, what kind of man was Nate, that he let them turn him into Natalie so easily?  Now that she knew they were paying attention, she was reassured.  Everything she had done, from the hours at the makeup mirror perfecting her skills, to getting her ass pumped full of some man’s cum and thanking him for it, had all been done in service to saving her own manhood!  She may have sucked a man off while wearing panties and a bra under her frilly French maid uniform, but she had done it because she was a man and a man does what she needs to in order to survive!   

Dr. Lilith finally spoke.  Her cold eyes betrayed no emotion. “After consulting with your instructors and witnessing your display, we have decided to allow you to retain your manhood for now under certain conditions.  The hormone injections will cease and your cage will be removed.  You may return to masculine presentation, however, you must agree to remain at the retreat.  

Some of your classmates have not performed to their sponsor’s satisfaction, tonight they will undergo vaginoplasty, a crude and outdated procedure that we only use to send a clear message. There is no going back.  

Over the next few months, these girls will receive the same MACR formula that made Stephanie, April, May and June.  The crude surgical construction will heal into a fully functional vagina attached to a functioning uterus.  They will become women in every medical way you could imagine.

These new women will need to experience womanhood entirely, that includes intercorse with men.  Some of them will be among the first of my obstetrics trials, so they will need to be impregnated.  They will also need to continue their education into how to please a man.  For all these tasks we will need bulls.  

You can, of course, refuse our offer and join your class, but we want you to remain here and serve as one of our bulls.  We believe that the psychological impact of being trained by a former member of their own class will accelerate the acclimation process. Understand that disobedience or unsatisfactory performance will lead to revocation of your status.  You will be taken to surgery, and enter the program with the rest of the girls.  Accept however, and I can promise that you will be kept very healthy and comfortable.  

Nate couldn’t believe his luck!  Not only did he get to be a man again, but he would spend all his time getting blowjobs and fucking!  After a lifetime as an addict on the streets, the Retreat was the best thing that had ever happened to him!  

“I accept!” he blurted.  

April stood up and slipped a small key off a ring attached to her belt and handed it to Nate.  “I will escort you to your new quarters.  Once you are there, you can get out of that outfit, clean off your makeup and remove your cock-cage. There are jumpsuits and other male clothes in the closet.”  

As April and Nate moved toward the open door on the other side of the room.  Dr. Lilith added.  “Get a good meal and get some rest.  I want you to be there when the girls wake up from their procedures”  

Nate nodded nervously and left.  

“That was unusually generous of you, Mother” Stephanie said. “I don’t recall getting an ultimatum before you feminized me.”  

“You sound like your sister!” Dr. Lilith said.  

Stephanie shook her head. “No, unlike Julia, I know I’m better off this way!  I’m just wondering what you are up to.”  

“Hope” Dr. Lilith said.

“Hope?” Asked Stephanie. 

Marcy smiled wide and sat back.  “Hope” she repeated as though she had just understood the punchline of a joke.  

Dr. Lilith nodded.  “The MACR cascade reaction restructure’s a man’s genitals into a vagina and ovaries without intervention.” 

“I remember it well.” Stephanie said with a grimace “It was not the most pleasant experience.”  

 “Right, you and Julia whined and bitched and moaned at me to make it stop for days!  Do you know why?”  the Doctor asked.  

“Because we didn’t want to be girls” Stephanie answered.  

“Because, with that thing still dangling between your legs, you still had HOPE that you wouldn’t be a girl!”  Dr. Lilith said.  “It taught me how hope can delay progress! Which is why I switched to complete, accelerated feminizations on the Island.” 

“Yeah and look how that turned out” Stephanie cast an accusing look at Marcy.  

Marcy’s scowled back. “I had nothing to do with Donna’s betrayal!”  

“No.” Dr. Lilith interjected.  “That was my fault.  I had expected Donna to adjust to womanhood too fast. She still had hope that she was still the swashbuckling adventurer Dean deep inside. Again, hope foiled our plans.”  

“And that brings us here.” Stephanie replied.  

“Everything in this retreat’s program is designed to utilize hope.” Dr. Lilith sat forward.  Her eyes animated at last.  “Sissy week worked because each of those Sissies hoped to escape feminization.  Tonight, we remove their cocks and with it, any hope of returning to manhood, but rather than catapulting them into womanhood like we did with on the Island, we lead them there gradually.  Remember the last set of tests with the prisoners? Cover their new pussies, and each of them will still see their old selves in the mirror, but as the MACR Takes hold, they will watch as that familiar face and body melts away, reshaped into the image we provide!  Their dickless cocks will take manhood out of reach, the relentless progress in the mirror will make womanhood inevitable.  Hope will become a dirty word in their own minds as we teach them new ways to think and act, as the weak subservient feminine ideal that their kind has tried to force onto us for generations.”  

“And Natalie… er I guess I mean Nate?”  Stephanie asked.  

“Nate is the cherry on the hopeless Sunday”  Marcy said with a grin.  

Dr. Lilith nodded at the comparison. “For future classes, Nate is an aspirational goal in sissy week.  ‘Be a good girl and maybe you can be a bull like Nate”  Dr. Lilith said.  “But, for this class, Nate adds betrayal.  When they first awaken and are still dilating their new equipment, I’ll instruct Nate to be gentle and sympathetic.  They will believe that they have a man on the inside, one last hope that somehow, someone, will help them.  That will last exactly until each of them loses their pussy-virginity to Nate’s cock.  At that point, all of them will understand that they are truly fucked!”  Dr. Lilith pressed her fingers together as she sat back with a smile.  “Hope has foiled me enough.  Tonight I make it my bitch!  Bring Tabitha in.  I want to squash something.”