XaiJu
Drewells976
Drewells976

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Chapter 233 - Chase

Comments

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Wiggles1

Thanks for the chapter

George R

Also, I think most people would barely recognize him .He’s gotten a growth spurt now and is way more buff lol.

Nurgle

Heavily agree. So many people want Kai to be some sort of edgelord, for-going all connections and family. I love seeing the growth of character and relationships, Flynn breaking down at seeing Kai alive, and them hugging it out makes my heart feel so full.

NeuroNine

“A cloak of clouds” Change to “A cloudy cloak” “leaving only the cold crystal lamplights to cast shadows on the streets of Higharbor.” This section doesn’t work as the first half describes the reflected light of the moons being blocked out. Light sources don’t cast shadows, objects blocking light sources cast shadows. “lamplight” is light emitted from a lamp, not the object casting light. Change to ““leaving only the cold crystal [streetlights OR lamps] to illuminate the streets of Higharbor.” “stalls of the Ring Road,” Delete “the” “voices and people grew sparse.” Replace “people” with “bodies” (flows better, more abstract, works better alongside voices) “A band of drunken sailors chanted a lewd song” “chanted” doesn’t work in this context, replace with “singing” or “sung” or another word Replace “song” with “shanty” (shanty is a sailor specific term, works better in this context) Change to “A band of drunken sailors sung a lewd shanty” “detected anyone suspicious” Replace “anyone suspicious” with “anyone as suspicious” OR “any suspicious [individuals/people/etc]” “That merchant made” Replace “merchant” with “merchant’s” “done deal [x] turned into an” Insert “had” at x “had gotten hold of the black market” Replace “gotten hold of” with “found out” “trafficking [x] was another matter.” Insert “however” at x “It could net from” Change to “Punishment ranged from” “and [x] kept his oath as far” Insert “had” at x “gold or two weren’t worth” Replace “weren’t” with “wasn’t” “making Street Hunch flare.” Change to “causing Street Hunch to flare” “coming from a distance” Replace “distance” with “mile away” “crime had gotten scarcer, and more dangerous” Change to “crime became scarcer, and a lot more dangerous” “could safely find [x] who was” Insert “out” at x “in the morning if he cashed” Comma after “morning” “sign of his pursuer.” Replace “his” with “the” “back into the sheaths” Replace “the” with “their” “but their hirer” Replace “hirer” with “employer” “before his Hunch told him” Delete “his” “that it would be a bad idea” Delete “it” “exert his Mana Sense over” Delete “his” “kicked [x] the wall to climb” Insert “off” “circles through the outer city” Replace “through” with “around” “If anyone is giving you” Replace “anyone is” with “anyone’s” “would end up in disaster” Replace “in” with “a” “little earlier like her” Replace “her” with “she did” “Someone was [x] going to have a bad day as well” Insert “also” at x Delete “as well” “waited twice more to” Replace “twice more” with “two more times” “Or were there more” Replace “were” with “was” “but [x] he was famished” Insert “right now” “he always got his best ideas” Replace “got” with “came up with” “with lamplights at each corner.” Replace “lamplights” with “streetlights” “terrors chuckled behind him.” Replace “him” with “the brat” “His large deadly eyes” Delete “his” “We need someone for” Replace “for” with “to be” “feigning not to see” Replace “not to see” with “ignorance” “and the jar of copper” Replace “the” with “a” “his knives but five to” Replace “but” with "except" or “except for” “wild stories about the frozen” Replace “about the” with “of” “lying about their size.” Replace “their” with “the” (Unless you mean the sailors were lying about the size of their nether regions) “box and took [x] the few” Insert “out” at x “Hunch offered no advice.” Change to “Hunch didn’t offer any advice” “It nibbled [x] another piece of fish.” Insert “on” or “with” at x “and he [x] wasn’t spelled” Repeating the same as first half, recommend altering slightly for variation. Insert “definitely” at x Replace “spelled” (too generic) with “cursed” OR “hexed” or another negative spell subcategory. “dinner like he wasn’t even” Replace “like” with “as if” “But you’re not going to bite” Delete “But” “watching him with aloof” Replace “watching” with “continuing to watch” “He only trained it looking” Replace “He” with “He’d” or “He had” “through the entire outer city” Replace “through” with “throughout” “meters under sea level” Change to “several meters below sea level” or "several meters under the sea" “a way to keep his fluency” Replace “keep” with “retain” “seemed [x] a common aesthetic choice” Insert “to be”

FrozenSharkey

I mean his examples were people who saw him in rags, the barmaid who had been asked to ward off the guy following Flynn, and the lookout kid. He might be less obvious to the general population than he thinks.

Wiggles1

I do wonder if Flynn was in denial or if he actually had hope that Kai was alive.

Fleisch

Chapter will be out in a couple hours.

Doug Wills

The chances of the trunthseeker even knowing that Kai is back is miniscule. Kai knows that when he last was around other people, he had been noted for breaking the law and had been conscripted to mandatory years of military service. So, assuming Kai is not a complete idiot, he will get away from the island, and the Rebublic as a country, as soon as he can

Connor Hinrichs

Or shadow magic

Connor Hinrichs

Kai needs to leave the island, maybe to one of the schools on the mainland, and he needs to not got to Republic lands,

Connor Hinrichs

As a mage there is no way Kai doesnt know how to control his mana

Gorane

Congrats on your book! This story has been quite enjoyable so far! Some things I'm looking forward to: - him meeting back with his parents - what his old teachers are up to - since 2 years have passed has his guide been fully unlocked? - some more character development and consequences, there's no way that truthseeker will let go of him now Really fun read! thank you for writing

Memoryofgold

I mean, if he was fighting yellow beasts daily and learning more about magic/runes during that time I don’t see why not? That’s an insane amount of exp

James Faulkner

Bad boys are back in town baby! Looking forward to this new arc

Abe 7

So... if this is late does that mean we will get another chapter this weekend? :)

hello there

I wonder if this Street Hunch is based off Favor.

Fleisch

Im so happy to see him back. I missed him when they went to the ruins.

Mistfate

„ Even unparalleled talent and greatness had their limits if he ran into a rogue with double his attributes. “ - yes, Yes, YES !!!

Bergil Melny

I cant wait for more

Kris Piskorski

Either Zervathi or maybe the violet moon?

James Faulkner

He probably dropped improvisation for space magic aswell

Gorane

It seems Kais social skills naturally went straight out of the window after two years spent in isolation. It's to be expected tho since humans are not built for lonelyness

M_Lo

Hallowed intuition being at the first milestone is very huge news! That skill was very slow to level and was previously at lvl 18. That means he has earned atleast 32 levels for it, which is a whopping 22 400 xp. Yeah, no way he isnt already yellow when meeting Flynn here.

Gorane

Very interesting to see what Flynn has been up to, honestly impressed with him being mature enough to not get himself in more danger.

Gorane

Bro yellow 2 will probably take 500k xp, + he needed another 150k for yellow 1. There is no way he suddenly started to earn like 4 times as much as he previously was earning

Gorane

I agree with the decision to use flashbacks. Too many authors feel the need to show every little bit of action. Having a store of memories that the reader hasn't seen yet is a good idea.

Random Information

And he is kenough

Gorane

Maybe but he could be well into yellow 2 or even 3 if he didnt

Steven Thompsen

Thanks for the chapter! Finn was slaking on the runes without Kai. I wonder how Kai will navigate re-entering the world without ending up with half the republic after him

Aagness

No shot

Kendelle Trotter

I'm guessing that it is Kai's owner. It probably picked Kai up to be its servant in the Sanctuary.

Random Information

Maybe Hallowed Intuition

SUlex

Last time his full stats were shown was chapter 219 just for reference :)

Austin

Assuming you meant book 4: Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday. No change.

Doug Wills

Soul of the warrior - Kyfe

Ihsan Gunay

Meanwhile, I just scroll by the stat screens lol. Prolly look at this one though since its a big gap. Might have to go back to find some previous numbers though.

Emily Gurnavage

What novel?

John Smith

Now I know why my favorite novel is in hiatus! The author is reading my other favorite novels! 😱

Ihsan Gunay

I hope Flynn also gets a blessing that increases his affinity or something. I think it would be great if Kai isn’t the only one who gets one.

Fleisch

what’s going to be the schedule of release for book 3

Butters

Remember when people thought Flynn was annoying? Best. Sidekick. Ever.

Malcolm Haynes

: )

Ananiash

I bet he's yellow and people can sense it now like they could with the uncle. Especially if he hasn't been keeping up with his mana suppression training

Josh Smith

Na, he’s probably somehow grown horns and thinks it’s normal. That or be smells really really bad and is nose blind from his two years in the sanctuary

Rah

That's pretty much what we saw with the whole kidnapping/pirate chapters. Even though it was a long time ago and he didn't have his profession he could hold his own against battle oriented adults (though struggling and being helped by Flynn). Though it will be interesting to see how he compares to people who, like him, have both melee combat skills and decent freeform magic as this seems to give him a huge advantage in fights, especially with the surprise effect of his multiple affinities and cool skill upgrades

kiewitz

I would say it would need a 20 year gap to be able to wipe the floor with him. It was pretty straightforward in the writing that he's been working on powerful skills from a considerably younger age AND he advances them faster than his peers. His talent is genius level, but he also out WORKS everyone else, too. Only the elites of the elites will match his work ethic, and even they would have started their Skill set probably 6 or 7 years older than Kai did AND he had amazing mentors that were probably better than most elites of the Republic could find. 10 years doesn't seem like much of an advantage when you consider those factors. Now add on 2 years of fighting for his life against Yellows+... 20 years AND above average or elite to "wipe the floor with him." He could probably match some in the above average category with the 20 year age gap if he gets a favorable match up.

Kyfe

Or literal flashbacks from PTSD. Not always, but an occasional harrowing snippet when his adrenaline gets pumping could be exciting.

Kyfe

That was my first guess

zeke hustwit

Is it the god?

Craig

I wonder why people are staring. Did our boy have a glow-up?

Kaze

Thank you!

Andrew

I would prefer one more normal chapter before the flashback. I really hate it when it is paused like this

TheFool

So hyped to know whst he gained over there! My bet is that he had to evolved his class.

ppbrro

I kno rite? It’s like torture waiting to see and then the first chapter gives us pretty much zero information.

Invalid Entry

I just wanna know what's up with the cat

Steven Thompsen

This was great, but the perspective cut was briefly confusing. I'm excited for this arc!

Ben

Ooh Flynn might be blessed by the Wandering Moon. A silver cat with violet eyes and the moon was described as violet earlier in the chapter...

Austin

I feel like with the way this story is "for his age group" is the important part. Kai probably counts as nearly a genius for his pears; but if someone was just above average and had ten years more time to train their skills? They would probably wipe the floor with him. We are guaranteed to have few issues with being OP, considering that his teacher seemed to be hundreds of years old.

Nathan Sto

Thanks for the chapter! :-)

Stephen Pearson

I read that as literally make a drawing of their appearance and don't approach. So Flynn can know who it is later without them risking themselves.

Austin

We want stats! We want stats!

Wiggles1

The transition to the section with Kai's perspective ("Kai had hoped the looks...") could use some sort of separator, a dashed line or something. Took me a bit to realize it was a whole new scene. Not sure how to do that in Patreon, of course. FFS they really need to update the UI. Edit suggestion: Just draw their appearance -> Just draw their attention

A B

I think even in Republic levels he should be above average for his age group

The Fergun

I don't know if this was a typo but I noticed you said in the beginning “someone was being followed” did you mean to say “he was being followed”?

ArtHunt

Nice. Wonder what that cat is.

Adunn

Kai? Dead? Everyone knows he has at least 70% cockroach dna.

Gwalmeich

I assume he’s OP for the archipelago at this point lol.

James Faulkner

Awesome restart, Tftc! I can’t wait to see that status sheet, Kai must be a monster lol

James Faulkner

The transition between Flynn POV and Kai POV was confusing. Is there supposed to be a break there?

Austin

Just Ken

The Fergun

Yess were back! Thanks for the chapter!

Jackjargon

It just says "Married to Barbie"

Doug Wills

I want to see Ken's status sheet so bad

Aryan Dugar

I think it’s smart to reveal what happened when it’s plot relevant. I think jaunts in a separate world would be a little too different of a survival focused story than what you’ve been cultivating with the story currently. I think that I’m excited to see how different Kai is

Cameron C

Good to see Kai again. I hope he’s not over or under powered by the republic. It won’t be a good story if he is

mhaj58

Thanks for the chapter!

Austin


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