Shots of Bad Whiskey

“Dip? Yo! Dip!” Wendy Corduroy calls into the idling bus, parked at the end of the street coming off the interstate highway. “Yo Tommy, imma get him off for yah.” She says to the bus driver, who nods and tips his hat.

“Ma’am.” The sandy blonde haired guy says, she rolls her eyes and laughs.

“I’m not a ma’am yet dude.” She jokes, climbing up the steps. She punches his shoulder, ignoring his whiny complaints as she peers down the bus. “There you are!” She calls out at the sleeping young man, “Yo! Wake up!”

“Huh?” Dipper mumbles, his eyes fluttering open. Then they fly wide. “OH! Wendy!” She thought she was ready for the inevitable hug. But holding her not so little anymore buddy is way nicer than she expected. He's still small, make no mistake, absolutely none of Stan seem to make it into Dip.

“Hey dude, sleep well?” She asks, only partially breaking the hug to smile at him.

“Haha, yeaahhhh… I uh, didn't mean to fall asleep.” Dipper says, rubbing the back of his head. Wendy finally breaks the hug fully, and ever so gently punches his shoulder.

“No worries, you look great by the way. I think you've managed to grow an entire inch.” She smirks, “here lemme grab that for you.” She reaches beside him, and hoists his suitcase.

“Thanks, speaking of looking good, you're fucking ripped dude.” Dip says, hoisting his bag onto his back before fixing his short yet still bushy hair.

“Thank you, I hit the gym everyday.” She answers while nodding to the bus driver. They step off the bus, and into downtown Gravity Falls.

“The gym? What happened to just cutting down…” Dipper's words trail off as he looks at the town in shock, “... trees and junk?” He finishes, the words sounding like an afterthought. In fairness, she gets why it's so shocking. The tiny sleepy town is tiny and sleepy no longer. Eight story buildings line the main street, with fancy boulevard-like sidewalks full of perfectly manicured trees. Shops of all kinds face out onto the fairly crowded streets, there’s so many people walking around here and there, and there are cars everywhere.

“What happened?” Dipper asks, looking around with wide eyes.

“Dave and his family moved into town, they've really changed the place.” Wendy answers. She runs her thumb over the gold wedding band on her finger. “He changed a lot of things.” She adds quietly to herself.

“Sorry, what was that?” Dipper asks.

“Oh, uh, nothin’” Wendy answers, taking his arm and pointing at the first thing she sees. “Come on, let's go say hi to Tambry before we head back.”

“Tambry still lives here? Is she still with Robbie?” Dipper asks with a grin

“Oh yeah dude, house, kids, you name it.” Wendy replies, taking Dipper’s hand before leading him into a fancy coffee shop. “Yo Tams! Look who showed up!” It's nice to have her friend back, even if it's only for a week. Her face falls while Dipper and Tambry catch up, and she grips her shoulder hard. She's gonna make the most of this, while she still can.

***

“It's just crazy.” Dipper says, throwing his hands up in the air. “I barely recognize the place.”

“Well dude it's been like, what? Ten years?” Wendy says. She drops the shopping bags at the door of her penthouse apartment. “You've changed a lot too.”

“Heh, guess you have a point there.” Dipper nods. He looks around with raised eyebrows. “Dang girl, this place is awesome. You and Dave got it made huh?” The warm feeling in her chest freezes over in an instant, and she runs a hand down her arm to her wrist. Still sore from the other night.

“Pshh yeah, it's uh, all Dave. I just stay at home.” She says. Then she grabs the bags and brings them to the counter. “Thanks for helping with groceries by the way. Sorry it took so long to get back home.”

“Course, and it's alright.” Dipper says, “It was nice to see some familiar faces.” If only this wonderful idiot knew how true that was.

“Yeah.” She says. Dave's not here, he's on a business trip to Portland. If she was gonna rebel… and there he is, the sweet boy who's grown up into a sweet young adult. Not a boy at all anymore. He's handsome, he's still slender but now it's in an adorable and intoxicating way.

Just a little… at least that's what she tells herself. She swallows a mouthful of spit. Then turns to face him.

“Dip?” She asks quietly. Her heart slams against her ribcage, her hands are shaking As he looks at her. Just once. Just one time. He looks at her with those soft eyes, that understanding smile.

And Wendy surges forward. She slams her lips into his.

“WENDY!?” Dipper asks before she crashes back into him, and this time he doesn’t pull away. His lips are soft, she figured they would be though. Dipper was always a soft guy, and that’s not a bad thing by any stretch. “Mmm!” Dip moans, trying to speak while also pulling her in.

“Mmmh?” She hums without letting her lips leave his. She caresses his back, loving how he shivers and sighs at the simplest touch. His little whimpers are so fucking cute.

“Mmmph.” Dipper states so matter of factly that she actually breaks their lip lock.

“That right?” She asks with a chuckle. Dipper doesn't answer right away, instead panting desperately. His sweater’s a bit disheveled, his hair is all mussed up. His cheeks are practically glowing.

“What about Dave?” Dipper huffs, finally able to string the sentence together. She frowns, and dives into his neck. He yelps as they crash backwards onto her couch. He moans feebly. “Wen-Wendy?”

“What about him?” She asks coldly, before sucking Dipper’s skin between her teeth. She bunches his sweater hard in her fingers. She doesn't want to think about that city slick fuck. Not right now.

“Y-y-your husband?” Dipper gasps. She keeps kissing for a moment, ignoring the rising shame in her head. Wendy groans, and pulls away fully. She's only now aware of her position, straddling Dipper Pines in the living room of her tiny, perfect, stupid, fancy new apartment.

“Dip.” She groans, “I-I don't wanna talk about him right now.”

“Well I think we should.” Dipper answers back, his eyes widen, then looks away before continuing, “Look, Wendy… It's not like I haven't wanted this. Wanted you.”

“Pssh yeah dude, you were so cute when you were simping.”

“My cuteness aside! You're married. This is, it's wrong Wendy.” He stammers in that classic Dipper way. She looks down, unwilling to look him in the eye after being called out for trying to seduce him.

“Listen Dip, things are a bit more complicated than that.”

“Complicated? Yeah! You're trying to cheat!”

“It's not that dude. Dave's…” She trails off, a dozen different replies all crash around in her head. She grips his sweater hard, then let's go entirely. “Whatever. Forget it. Sorry I'm a shitheel.” She climbs off him. She storms into her perfect kitchen with fucking marble countertops that she can't get messy or else.

“Wendy?” Dipper asks quietly, straightening out his adorable fucking sweater while standing up.

“Don't worry about it.” Wendy snaps back, “I'm just a cheating floozy. Dumb naggy bitch.” She whips open the cupboard, grabs a stupid $200 shot glass and all but slams it on the kitchen island.

“Hey, Wendy? What’s going on?” Dipper asks while sliding off the couch.

“I said don't worry about it Dipper!” She yells, yanking a bottle of the finest whiskey from the liquor cabinet. She tears the lid off and pours herself a shot. She shies away from him when he approaches her, resting across the kitchen island.

“Wendy?” Dipper says so gently and sweetly. She blinks, wetness slips down her cheeks. She tips her head up and downs the first shot.

“No!” She growls.

“Wendy, if something's going on, you know I'm here to listen right?”

“I SAID NO DIPPER! I DON'T WANNA TALK!” She shrieks, pouring another shaky shot, getting half of it on the marble, but she just pounds back her lacking second shot. Dipper calmly sits on the bar stool. Just fucking watching her, with that cute sympathetic stare. Kid was always a skeptic, but a sweet skeptic. He always had that bright core to him. That goodness she couldn't help but try and emulate back in the day.

The silence is like scalding steam, she works her hands on the bottle. Dipper doesn't say a word when she pours a third shot. He doesn't say a word as she pours it down her dumb whore throat. He doesn't say a thing as he stands up. She doesn't say a thing as he walks around the island and grabs a second shot glass. It's only once he sets it down on the counter, once he grabs a cloth and cleans up her mess that he finally speaks again.

“Let me pour.”

She does, But having him this close makes her want to crawl out of her skin. Or crawls into his lap. She darts around the island, taking his seat. He offers her one, then pours himself a double.

“It's not that I wanted to… I didn't wanna hurt you Dip. I don't wanna use you. That's not it.”

“I came off harsh, I'm sorry. I was just surprised.” Dipper answers before downing his. His face twists as it hits. “Blech, What is this stuff? Did you get it at a gas station?” She snorts, and wipes her nose with her sleeve.

“No, apparently it's the fanciest stuff money can buy.” She spits out, glaring at the bottle like it's the source of all of her woes. If only it was so easy.

“I was going to say, this place looks pretty nice.” Dipper answers evenly, gently.

“Dip, I'm… God What the hell is wrong with me? I'm just a stupid bitch who ruins everything.” Wendy says, grabbing her hair.

“Woah dude, where's all that coming from?” Dipper asks, downing another shot. “I'm going to guess it's not from you.” She glares at him, but there’s no real malice behind it, and judging by his soft expression he knows it.

“What are you, a shrink?” She asks, laughing a little. The pressure in her gut is weakening. She feels a little less worthless. Dave’s words fade away from her head.

“Nah, but I took two courses in second year.” Dipper replies. “God this shit’s worthless.”

“Pffff, try telling Dave that.” Wendy says, taking her next shot less aggressively. She stares at the glass, wondering how many she's had already. “We should probably stop.”

“Why don't we switch to water for now?” Dipper agrees, “I don't think I can stomach any more of this dirty diesel shit.” She barks out a laugh, and relaxes against the back of the bar stool.

“Diesel! I think exactly what it is. Tastes the way diesel smells.”

“Why does Dave even buy this shit?” Dipper asks, searching the cupboards for suitable cups.

“His brother owns the company.” She answers immediately, “Apparently it's the most expensive whiskey in North America.”

“What? That can't be true. Did he pay 2.8 million for it?” Dipper asks, “God I bought better stuff from Walmart.”

“Yeah… probably a lie.” Wendy says softly. Dipper hands her a regular glass of water. She downs it gratefully, the cool liquid slips down her throat so easily. “Wouldn't be the first thing he lied about.”

“Does he do that often?” Dipper asks, walking round to sit next to her.

“All the time. About literally everything. He always has to be right. He always has to have the last word.” She says, words spilling out before she can think to stop them, “Fuck, he used to be so sweet and thoughtful. Like you. He moved into town, he's the CFO of his dad's construction company. They built this place, all the places downtown.” She's still talking, and Dipper Pines is still listening.

Maybe… maybe he'll listen to everything? Maybe she can actually tell him?

“Hey uh, Dip?”

“Yeah?”

She takes a deep, steadying breath in. Then she exhales it all at once. “Can I be like, totally honest with you?”

He nods without hesitation. So, Wendy starts to talk.