The Feast Season: Part 1

The Doldrums

It was always so slow, between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Ed rolled onto his side, looking at the side of the bed where his girlfriend was. Or would be, normally. The bedclothes were tangled up and the early morning sunlight was streaming through their bedroom window. 

Ed sat up, the fluffy comforter falling into his lap and revealing his soft paunch. He rubbed it and yawned while he looked around the room. The plate that had held last night’s late snack held nothing but crumbs and a note that read “Morning Hon’” on the front of the folded paper. The rest of the room was immaculate, and was in the middle of its yearly transformation into a festive winter wonderland. 

“Nessa must have put that up when she got out of bed.” He scratched at the stubble on his cheeks, struck copper by the sunrise. “That woman is like…if Martha Stewart and Wonder Woman had a daughter.” He chuckled, in awe of his luck, and swung his legs out of the bed. 

Now Ed wasn’t a schmuck by any stretch, he stretched to his full 6’3” height and cracked his back with a satisfied sigh. He had soft hair that was currently shaggy and in a state of untamed bed-head, and a jaw that would be considered chiseled if it weren’t adorned by a slight double chin. Still, despite Nessa’s reassurances, he always felt like she was so far out of his league. He shrugged and shook his head before he crossed the room and picked up the note. 

Don’t forget our morning yoga, I’ll bring up breakfast after we’re done! XOXOXO

He smiled, his eyes misty, and went to the stack of DVDs on the dresser to select their workout. Ed puffed softly, he knew that Nessa would put him through his paces before she let him eat. 

“It’s important to remain flexible, when blimping up.” He recited with a smile. 

“You’re getting the idea, my growing love.” Said a voice behind him, and hands with slender fingers gripped gently into his lovehandles. 

“Always coming up behind me.” Ed said, his voice low and gravelly. 

“It’s hard not to, when you’ve got so much behind. More and more by the day.” Nessa laughed. “Now let’s get that behind in gear.” 

Nessa leaned over and took one of the DVDs, “Flow! Perfect!” 

Ed groaned and sagged against her. “Ohhhh, why can’t we just do something easy? Burn fewer calories? Make me fatter faster?” He blinked innocently.

“Oh no, tubby. We’re gonna supersize you the right way!” Nessa prodded his soft paunch underneath his navel, then put the DVD into the player. 

Ed huffed and allowed himself to be bent into a plump pretzel at record speeds for the next half hour. Whenever the thought he wouldn’t be able to negotiate his chubby form into a pose, he would feel Nessa’s hands on his back or shoulders gently correcting his posture and helping him push through his limits. He began to sweat and breathe heavily, but Nessa stayed with him and kept him going. 

“Just a little longer, honey!” She would whisper in his ear. “Soon I’ll be filling up this belly, and then we can get you cleaned up.” 

Panting and blowing he felt like the most awkward and inflexible person on the planet compared to her, but he gave it his all. Soon enough the two of them laid back in resting pose. Ed almost dozed off, but he still heard Nessa going downstairs to the kitchen again. His stomach rumbled in anticipation. 

Sometime later he woke up to a cool damp cloth wiping his brow and face. “Wakey-wakey, eggs and bakey!” Came his lover’s voice, soft and playful as she dangled a strip of bacon over his mouth. He let his lips open limply and she lowered it in. With a soft moan, Ed stirred slightly as he chewed. Nessa’s cooking always made workouts like this worth it. 

He sat up slowly and leaned his back against her, she moved the breakfast tray onto his lap and continued to feed him tenderly. Now spooning cheesy scrambled eggs and sausages into his mouth. The rumbling in his stomach quieted little by little as he worked his way through his enormous breakfast. Six pancakes, at least six eggs, half a pound of bacon, half a pound of sausage, and several bowls of mixed fruits. 

“You need to get all of your food groups in, fatso.” Nessa said, prodding Ed’s now quite stuffed midsection. 

By the end of his meal Ed was full to a nearly agonizing level, his small paunch was stretched tight over his food packed stomach. He moaned as Nessa massaged the bloated dome of his girth. 

“Mmmph…I love you…” He puffed, half delirious. “Whaddayou want for Christmas, babe?” 

“Oh, more of this would be nice, you?” Nessa replied with a grin. 

“You read my mind.” He groaned and leaned upward to kiss the love of his life tenderly on the lips.