UL1 - Book 10 - Chapter 14

“Tell me, what’s going on inside your heart and head?” Max asked.

Sitting on the stone that had been marked for him, Jazzjak took a moment to compose himself.

Can… can I really trust them?

Memories flooded his mind, ones that made him flinch.

Some had used him as a footstool, propping their feet, or other body parts on him, showing each day what they thought of the aid he offered.  Two had killed him within the first three hundred years, upset with him because he pointed out ways they could succeed, questioning their own abilities it appeared.

Others had done far worse, and yet he had endured. Each time his heart grew harder. Every god that came was often destined to fail, not taking the time to study the knowledge given and expecting the power they had to carry them further than possible.

Three times a trio of gods had joined together, forming a world and chaos erupted as they fought. In under 10,000 years the planet was barely a shell, one god remaining, a land torn asunder. Their life ended quickly in the challenge that came.

He knew he winced, felt the tears that were running down the fur they had chosen for him to wear. This body had for a moment felt like a joke. He had believed this was their way of belittling him. Yet that Max never teased him of his appearance. When the man looked at him, he saw a love for the shell he wore.  

I could have looked like one of their own, like the others had, yet he asked for this… his wife, she didn’t hesitate.  What kind of man has this much compassion for all that he meets? He even offered Kherbann a chance to surrender.  

A hand reached out and gently scratched between his ears and a warmth he didn’t know was possible filled his chest.  His foot started to thump uncontrollably and he glanced at it, chuckling.

“Sorry,” Max said. “Old habit. My friend… Jazzjak. He provided me a home on a planet that wasn’t mine and watched over me. At first it was nothing more than a business deal and yet he stood by me, willing to leave his family and put his trust in me to keep them safe.”

He watched as the godman beside him stared upward into the sky, a small smile on his face. Max chuckled once before looking at him.

“Even when the world I had unknowingly become a champion of was taken over and another god had him under his thumb, he risked his life as much as possible to give me a chance to defeat my opponent. When the next challenge came, Jazzjak chose to return with us to our world, bringing his wife and ten?”

“Twelve,” Tanila said.

“Twelve children,” Max chuckled. “He could slaughter many in the city and yet he was kind and caring. All he wanted was a place for his family to grow, safe from a god that saw the death of others as the only path forward. I remember the first time he let me scratch  his head and how it had made his foot do that.”

The three of them sat there in silence for a minute, only Miranna making some babbling noises as Tanila’s finger traced her cheek.

“I… I need to ask and yet I feel it is not my place… No, it isn’t my place. I’m am but a helper and–”

“You’re more than that,” Max said. The man’s hand touched his shoulder, and he almost flinched, but didn’t. It was kindness, not anger.

“You say that… I have been mistreated… abused. The things I have seen and endured. My heart was or perhaps is lost I believed. Yet watching you seven the tiniest crack appeared. Even though I didn’t believe it, in this short amount of time I feel something worming its way inside, forcing me to believe that you are different.”

“What are you afraid of?” Tanila asked. “And please, don’t take that question as prying but simply as wanting to know how we can prove ourselves. You would be surprised to know how much each of us has suffered at the hands of another.  Batrire and Fowl could tell you the story of how they abandoned their families to pursue love and adventuring. Cordellia… well she would have to tell you her story if she desired. The pain she carries we are doing what we can to help dissolve every day.

“Sog…”

Both Max and Tanila chuckled, glancing at each other before their eyes found him again.

“Sog is a different one,” she said. “He comes from a race that is all about taking advantage of others and yet I’ve seen a demon change. If a demon can change, can’t anyone?”

Jazzjak felt a laugh he couldn’t hold back come from his lips.  The truth of her words rang true and he considered the things he had witnessed the creature say and do had gone against all his beliefs. Even when forced to wear a body that he knew was meant for something else, the demon hadn’t once looked at him like that. In fact he could have sworn he had seen regret at his choice.

“She’s right,” Max said. “Tanila’s story and mine are so far apart and yet the same. She shared some of it today but there is far more beneath the surface than that. I was bound, beaten and tossed into a cart, ready to be killed for what was inside me. I escaped with help and had to fight to survive…”

He watched as the god frowned, taking a deep breath before looking up at his wife and squeezing her knee.

“You can tell him. We have all the time in the world.”

“Yes… yes we do,” Max replied.

Jazzjak watched the man before him changed before he spoke. He sat upright, shoulders back and not slouched. A steady gaze, tempered expression was etched almost like stone.

He is about to share the pain he feels and doesn’t look to be afraid at all. How bad could it truly be?

***

“And now I sit here next to you,” Max said, a kind smile the only change in his expression the entire telling of the story.

I… he… so much and yet he never gave in. He never let the darkness consume him.

Jazzjak chuckled at the play on words that he had unintentionally thought.

“Sorry… I just… how? How can you endure so much and yet not be broken by it?”

“Because I have a family and love,” Max said. “I know back home those I care about are safe and I know those who are beside me will do whatever they can to protect me just as much as I can to protect them.  You need to know I’ll do whatever I can to help you and protect you.”

“But why?”

Tanila’s voice rang out, her laughter was pure and he watched as she snorted at the end.

“Because he’s Max,” she said. “Trust me, I didn’t get it either at first. I resisted his attempts and didn’t want to believe a man could overcome the darkness and hunger his skill had. I could barely overcome the lust of my own. Yet he didn’t think any different of me when I told him the truth of who and what I was. In fact…”

She paused, her free hand reaching out and Max took it, drawing it close as he leaned over and kissed it.

“I think he loved me more because he knew I understood the pain and temptation he felt.”

“No… really it was how amazing you look with your hair unbraided,” Max replied.

Tanila freed her hand and gave him a shove, the two of them laughing before they turned back to face him.

“She’s right,” Max said. “There’s a unique bond when someone finds another who has endured like they have. Each of our members has gone through a crucible of sorts. Some were harder than others, but each of us faced and overcame them. Not all of us escaped without scars, even if they don’t show on the outside.”

That hand once again appeared, this time held out in a gesture that felt weird.

Seeing a god sitting on the ground next to him, not standing above over him, offering his hand like that removed another piece that had hardened over his heart.

“You don’t have to take it, but I’ll–”

Jazzjak didn’t wait, his soft hand grabbing the larger and calloused one of the man who seemed so different than he had expected. There had been fear, concern, doubt and more upon learning he had a black skill. 

It had seemed impossible. The stories of how those hosts were when reaching godhood left no doubt they killed everyone and everything around them they thought might provide some kind of growth.  None were safe and yet this one, this Max Hoste, was the opposite of all he knew and believed.

“I am honored to know you,” Jazzjak said. “My promise to share all the wisdom I have gained in my life will never be broken.”

Max nodded and him and smiled. There was no hint of aha I fooled him or any other kind of deceit. It was the same one he used for his wife or the others here with him.

“As does mine to help you grow stronger and protect you. Now then, if you don’t mind, I think I need to sit down and discuss a few other things while we feed our daughter.”

“I am available whenever you need,” he replied. “As you know I never sleep.”

“You should,” Max said. “Even if you don’t need to. I know that sometimes its easier not to because of fear or nightmares but I also find that dreams are a good thing to have. If you ever want to rest, just let us know. We’ll give you that opportunity.”

He rose, mimicking the moves of both gods.

“Thank you. Thank you for more than I can say right now.”

“Oh, don’t give him a bigger head,” Tanila said with a wink. “We both know eventually we’ll have to widen the door to our place soon if it gets larger.”

Laughter echoed through the grounds as they began to walk toward the entrance of Tanila and Max’s home.

“I think I’ll leave it up for another day. Tomorrow or a few weeks later I can remove it. Part of me likes having a place for everyone to gather,” Max said.

Jazzjak shook his head.

A god with so much power and kindness… I pray when the day comes and he fights the other two black skills… perhaps he will find a way to survive.