Chew Time: Pupper Popsicles (Preview)

The woman smiled brilliantly. “Hellooo! This is Rachel Groves here with another classic episode of The Transformative Chew. We ain’t selling out today, everybody! You don’t have ta skip ahead, you naughty skippers!”

Rachel rolled back slightly in her chair. “Today, my special, hangry viewers, I bring to you something that hits close to home!” She reached down, disappearing beneath the table. “It’s a treat developed by someone VERY dear to my heart!”

With a loud grunt, the lady lifted a large cooler onto the table. She patted it gently, looking straight ahead. “Yes yes, this is shameless plugging for them. Buuut, I assure you all, you’ll love the results nonetheless!”

Suddenly, images of beaches and the burning sun flashed repeatedly, replacing Rachel. “Now, it’s summertime and that means it’s super hot outside! At times like this, you’ll want to cooool on down so you don’t melt away, riiiiight?”

The scene cut back to Rachel as she opened the cooler. “And for that, you’ll want something chill, something nice that you don’t have to be constantly drinking or eating in order to beat that heat.”

She reached into the open cooler and pulled out a pink-wrapped popsicle. “Ta-DA! I present to you the Pupper Popsicle!”

The scene shifted again. Now, an unwrapped, orange popsicle was on a slowly spinning display tray. Rachel’s voice was heard. “The Pupper Popsicle was developed by my number one pup, Jessica the Toon Pupper, or Jessie Pupper if you wanna be fresh!

“The Pupper Popsicle is an exclusive treat only found in her ice cream cart in our local area. It comes in a variety of flavors from strawberry to your tasty creamsicle! It’s packed with toony vitamins and chilling calories that’ll keep you cool throughout a scorcher of a day!”

Rachel, her popsicle, and her table reappeared again, this time without the cooler. “And yes, it’s probably obvious what the effects of this are, but don’t you worry!” She waved the popsicle. “A new, fuzzy coating won’t increase your heat! You remain all cooool!”

With a giggle, she ripped open the popsicle’s top. The image zoomed in on it briefly, showing that the treat was white with dark spots. Zooming back out, she let out a low “oooo”.

“Oh, I recognize this!” She tore off the rest of the wrapper. “This will bring out a certain breed in me. No colorful fur for this one, but that’s fine! The results will still be satisfying!”

She brought the popsicle close to her nose and gave it a sniff. There was a stock sound effect of a drum roll as the camera slowly zoomed in, this time on her nose.

However, it zipped right back out as fast as it started. She gently rubbed her plain, normal nose. “Unlike many of the foods we’ve tried, there’s no scent effect this time. No fun changes happen from a simple sniff.”

She nodded. “I know, I know, disappointing. But, the zany fun all starts in the licks. Watch closely!”

She turned her head to the side. The camera went back in, keeping her head fully in the shot as she brought her popsicle close. She held its stick end to her mouth and stuck her tongue out. Its tip touched the end, her face twitching.

Slowly, she ran her tongue from the top to the tip of the icy treat. The reddish pink tongue brightened as it did, growing pinker and pinkier. Any bumps or color variants vanished as it turned solid, flat pink. It grew as well, getting longer and longer until it was almost a foot long.

Once she reached the top, Rachel pulled away and faced the camera. Her tongue still hung out, low panting coming from her. She began to speak, but her words were messy and mushy, almost impossible to understand.

Thankfully, a helpful caption appeared that read, “And now, we begin with the first change! That delicious taste is sucked right into it, so of course it gets bigger to hold more and more of that yummy sweetness!”

She gave her face a lick, a loud, cartoonish SLURP following. The pink, wet tongue slid across her mug from one end to the next, getting a goopy coating of drool over it. It quickly dried, though something replaced it.

White fur began sprouting from around her lips. Small at first, it spread out to every part of her chin and cheek that she licked up. It almost looked like a beard if not for how fluffier and softer than facial hair it looked. Even her lips weren’t spared, though instead they turned black and glossy, almost gummy like an animal’s.

“And now, another lick!” the next caption read.

Rachel turned back into her profile view shot and went in for another lick. This one went quicker than before, her dog tongue longer than the treat itself. Her face again twitched and shivered, some hairs sticking up before vanishing into the flat splash of white fur on her face.

There were small pops. Her face lurched forward despite her head staying in place. It grew longer and longer, jaws shifting as visible teeth turned beastial. Her nose was dragged along, turning coal black and glossy. It swelled and inflated, nearly tripling its former size as its shape took on that of a dog’s.

“Mmmm!” Rachel cooed, looking forward once more. Her tongue slipped back, her new muzzle fully capable of taking it all in. “That’s some goooooood white chocolate taste!”