Helen and Lillie

— Hey, what’s up? — I said, shoving a piece of bread into my mouth and looking at Lillie’s face. Just a moment ago she was yelling that she was dying of thirst, but now she was silent, clutching the water bottle to her chest like it was something priceless.

— There… it’s that boy again, — Lillie breathed out, holding the bottle even tighter against her chest, like she was afraid someone might take it away. Her big eyes darted toward the road, and with bread still in my mouth, I turned my head too.

I saw him right away. Messy light-brown hair, always-worn-out shirt, and that same cocky look. Jayden. Eleven years old, the local orphan who’d been trailing after us for the past few weeks. He stood on the road, leaning on a stick, and the moment he caught my gaze, he quickly turned away, pretending to be examining something.

— Pretending he just happened to be here, — I muttered under my breath and shoved the rest of the bread back into the sack. — Damn brat.

Lillie tugged at my sleeve.

— Helen, he’s going to follow us anyway. Maybe we should just… take him in?

I snapped my head toward her. Her brown eyes, big and a little naive, looked completely childlike right now, but I knew exactly who was inside. Mr. Brown. The man who was yelling at me through the rearview mirror a year ago, right before a bus came out of nowhere and slammed into us at full speed. We were reborn here, in these bodies, almost immediately. And the millionaire, boss, bastard was now standing here—or rather, in his place stood a ten-year-old girl with a bow in her hair, clutching a water bottle to her chest like it was her only treasure.

— Do you even understand what you’re saying? — I hissed. — He’ll only get in our way. He’s eleven. Do you want me to be his babysitter too?

— You’re already a babysitter, — Lillie shot back, stubbornly pressing her lips together like a child.

I felt my eye twitch.

— What? — my voice came out too loud.

— Well, what? — she shrugged, and the bottle of water swayed a little in her hands. — Look at yourself. Carrying bags, guarding me, finding food, even scolding me when I talk too much… Just like… mommy.

I let out a loud breath, staring down the road disappearing into the hills.

‘Mommy. Shit. Of course. That’s how she twisted it now. Even though I’m the one in charge here, she still kept that bastard’s personality.’

I used to be Michael Randall, a driver with twenty years behind the wheel, a man with calloused hands and a bad back. And now I was a twenty-two-year-old chick named Helen, with long chestnut hair and breasts that made every torn shirt feel like a damn curse.

— Lillie, — I turned slowly toward her, — say that one more time, and I… I…

— What? — she smirked, squinting at me. — Spank me? That would be very… nanny-like.

I stumbled over my own thoughts. ‘God, she used to be a man. My fucking boss. And now… she’s saying this with a little girl’s voice, smiling, teasing me on purpose. Since when did she accept all this? It wasn’t that long ago that she found it humiliating to be reminded who she’d become, and now she’s saying stuff like that.’

I clenched my teeth, the sack of bread suddenly feeling heavier.

— Seems like you forgot who’s just a little girl here — I growled, trying to keep my voice from shaking.

Lillie pressed the bottle to her breasts and pretended to yawn.

— Yeah… a girl, but with the brain of a grown man. Don’t forget, Helen, I’m still smarter than you.

— What’s even left of that grown man in you? You can’t take a single step without me.

Lillie snorted like I had just said something hilarious.

— Keep grumbling, mommy. But you know damn well that without me, you’d have gotten yourself into trouble long ago.

I almost burst out laughing.

— Trouble? Girl, every single day I risk my ass for you! I find food, search for a place to sleep, do dumb errands for random assholes. And you? All you do is walk around here acting smart.

— Hey! For the record, it was my idea to make a deal with Cregan and sneak into that villa.

— The idea was yours, but I was the one who pulled it off, — I cut her off sharply, shifting the sack into a more comfortable grip and wincing without meaning to. — And anyway, you’d better not even bring up that villa. My tits still hurt from those memories.

Lillie instantly lit up, like she’d been waiting for this.

— Oh yeah, that was brilliant! — she burst out laughing, covering her mouth with her hand. — Remember when that guard grabbed you? His face, when he realized he wasn’t holding your side but a handful of your tits…

I nearly choked on air.

— Shut the fuck up! — I barked, feeling my cheeks burn. — Do you even understand what I had to go through?!

Lillie tilted her head slightly, like she was pretending to think.

— What you went through? Well… the hands of a huge guy holding you so tight your shirt stretched, and everyone could see how… um, busty you are now. — She giggled, hugging the bottle tighter to her chest in imitation of me. — Oh, Helen, that was a sight.

I clenched my teeth, gripping the sack so hard the strap dug into my palm.

— If you hadn’t opened your smart-ass mouth and started arguing with Cregan, I wouldn’t have had to play the whore just to distract the guards!

— Yeah, but it worked, — Lillie snorted. — And, by the way, it’s your own fault you’ve got curves like that. I’ve got nothing to do with it.

My eyes dropped down without me even realizing it. Shit, she was right. Every morning, when I pulled on that damned torn shirt, my breasts felt like extra weight, keeping me from even taking a proper breath. And when I ran or fought—they bounced, pulled at the fabric. Even now I could feel the cloth clinging to me, like the whole world had nothing better to do than stare at how much they stuck out.

I swallowed and looked back toward the road, where Jayden was still hanging around. He pretended to poke at the dirt with a stick, but I caught the way he kept sneaking glances at us.

— There he goes staring again, — I muttered. — Tell me the truth, Lillie, don’t you think he’s hanging around way too often?

She turned her head sharply.

— I don’t think so… — she mumbled, pressing her lips together.

— The hell’s that supposed to mean? — I narrowed my eyes. — Wait, wait. Don’t tell me it’s him you’ve been sneaking off to meet these past two weeks every evening when you claim you’re going to "think about life"?

Lillie flinched like I’d slapped her, then jerked her head away, burying her nose in the bottle.

— N-no, — she forced out. — I just… just go for walks.

I twisted my face in a grimace.

— Walks? Yeah, sure. With a face that blushes like a schoolgirl’s the second I ask about him? — I stepped closer, staring right into her eyes. — Lillie, don’t tell me you’re in love?

She snapped her head up, her eyes widening, but then she turned away again. Her cheeks flushed pink.

— Fuck off… — she muttered under her breath, but I heard it.

I let out a surprised snort.

— Jesus. You used to be Mr. Brown! A forty-five-year-old man! You yelled at me like I was a dog, made me sit in the car for hours while you had your damn meetings. And now… — I jabbed my finger into her forehead. — You’ve fallen for an eleven-year-old brat.

— I’m not in love! — she squealed, but it was way too fast, way too sharp.

I crossed my arms over my breasts, feeling them push tight against the fabric of my shirt, making it impossible to even stand naturally. That stupid constant reminder that my whole body, every move, gave away that I was a woman.

— He just… listens to me, — she said quietly, then suddenly lifted her eyes at me and snapped, — unlike some people!

I froze for a second, not even knowing what to say.

— Oh, — I exhaled, turning my head toward the boy.

Jayden was still hanging around on the road, but now he was staring straight at us, not even trying to look away. Stubborn, almost challenging, like he was waiting for me to wave him over and invite him in.

I snorted.

— He listens to you… Jesus, Lillie, he looks at you because you’re the only girl who talks to him. He’s not after philosophy, he just wants to stick with us so he doesn’t starve to death.

— Don’t say that, — she snapped, her voice suddenly ringing with real seriousness. — He’s normal.

— Normal?! — I almost laughed, but it came out jagged, angry. — Lillie, he’s a ragged kid with no family, no roof over his head. There are plenty like him here. And besides, you’re too damn young to be thinking about that stuff.

I was ready to laugh again, but she jerked her chin up just like she used to when she was sitting in that leather chair barking orders at whole departments. Only now it looked ridiculous: a little girl in a brown dress, with a bow in her hair and a bottle of water, pretending to be in charge.

— And you’re better, huh? — her voice trembled, but it came out harsh. — You’re the one always running around with men.

I stepped closer, pressing down on every word:

— That. Saves. Our. Lives.

She bit her lip and refused to look away.

— Or maybe you just don’t mind anymore, — she breathed. — Maybe you even like it, Helen.

My breath caught. My chest tightened like the shirt had suddenly shrunk. Shit, her words hit too close. I knew I had excuses: deals, survival, necessity. This world was brutal, especially for a girl. But the memory still hit me—how that night at the inn a man’s hand had grabbed my breast hard, how I still moaned, and how a cold shiver ran through me that I almost wanted to melt into.

I turned my head sharply, throwing a glance at Jayden. He was standing motionless, still staring right at us.

— I’ll think about it, — I said irritably, feeling the heat from my cheeks running down my neck, — after you apologize.

Lillie jerked her chin up.

— Not a chance, — she spat stubbornly. — I told the truth.

I clenched my teeth.

— The truth? — I stepped closer, towering over her, the sack of bread on my shoulder swinging and smacking painfully against my side. — The truth is, if I didn’t… do all this, we’d both be dead. And you know that damn well.

— Maybe yes, maybe no, — Lillie pressed the bottle to her breasts like it was a shield. — Or maybe without you I’d still be in my luxury suite, not stuck here in this shithole world.

— We’ve been through this already, you little idiot, — I spat, ready to say more, but right then a shout came from the road.

I whipped my head around. Jayden was being held by two older teenagers, maybe fourteen. They twisted his arms, one of them smacked his leg with a stick, and the boy fell to his knees in the dust. The other laughed, shoving him in the shoulder.

— Look, the ragged brat’s here again, — one of them jeered. — Bet he came begging for scraps.

I had already taken a step forward, grinding my teeth. But Lillie suddenly darted ahead of me.

— Hey! — she yelled in her thin little-girl voice, but with so much fury I actually froze. — Leave him alone!

She clutched the bottle to her chest, but still bolted toward the road, her bare feet slapping fast against the stones.

— Lillie, stop! — I shouted, realizing this was about to go bad. But too late — the little devil was already running straight at them.

The teenagers turned. One scowled, the other smirked.

— Look, the princess showed up! — laughed the one with the stick. — What, your little boyfriend ran to tattle?

Lillie stopped right in front of them, squared her shoulders, and clenched her fists.

— If you touch him again, I’ll… I’ll… — she swallowed hard, but her eyes didn’t waver. — I’ll tell Cregan.

I nearly groaned. ‘Idiot, dragging Cregan into this. Now those bastards will know she’s not some random girl.’

— Tell Cregan? — the older one mocked her. — Then go on, run to him! Meanwhile, we’ll play with your little boyfriend.

They shoved Jayden again. He cursed, struggling to break free, but he clearly didn’t have the strength.

I dropped the sack of bread on the ground, the sword on my back clanging as I lunged forward.

— Hands off! — I shouted.

The boys flinched. I didn’t look like some regular village girl: torn-up shirt, dried bloodstains, dark pants, a sword strapped to my back. And the sword added weight to my presence—I’d learned how to carry it right during my time here.

— Look, a bitch with a sword, — one of them scoffed, but his voice cracked. — What the hell do you want?

I stepped closer, forcing them to back away.

— I want you gone before I rip your heads off, — I hissed.

Silence hung for a moment. Then, after exchanging a glance, they let go of Jayden and stepped back. One of them muttered, “Freaks,” and they walked off.

I let out a heavy breath.

— Idiots, — I muttered, crouching toward Jayden. He was getting up from his knees, brushing off the dirt. His lip was split and bleeding, but those cocky eyes weren’t looking at me. They were locked on Lillie.

And Lillie stood there, clutching the bottle, staring back at him. Her cheeks were pink, her gaze softer.

— You okay? — she asked quietly.

— Yeah, — Jayden forced out, giving a crooked grin. — Thanks…

I watched them, feeling something tighten inside me. That was it. She wouldn’t admit it, but she was already caught. Her look, her voice—no boss, no Mister Brown. Just a girl who for the first time saw a boy willing to fight for her.

— Jesus, Lillie, — I muttered, shaking my head. — You’re really head over heels in lo—

— Shut up, Helen! — she barked instantly, and her eyes flashed so sharp I bit my tongue.

I bit down on my lip. I wanted to spill it all right there: that it was ridiculous, pathetic, that she used to be grown man, damn big boss, and now she was crushing on a brat. But looking at her… damn it, I couldn’t say it.

Meanwhile Jayden, that little punk, kept staring at her like no one else in the world existed.

And I stood there, suddenly feeling my shirt pull tight across my breasts. They shifted, and I instinctively pressed my hand against them, as if to hold them still. But that only drew Jayden’s attention, and I caught his gaze immediately.

He wasn’t looking at Lillie anymore. He was staring at me. At my tits. I clenched my teeth.

‘Fuck. Just what I needed.’