Piggy Sue And You

It's like 23 and Me, but with Piggy Sue!  And you!  How the hell does the Strawson family tree have more branches than the Scroffs?  Well, let's find out.

D'accord "Doc" Hopper was not, in fact, a doctor, but a restaurateur who brought Cajun style and flair to St. Charlies.  His Riverside Rest was a staple in the Aqua Village neighborhood back in the day, and his musically inclined wife Avie Lee was known to offer up her vocal talents to the ambiance.

Their second-born daughter, Benjamina, was discontent with her bumpkin family's homey local restaurant niche, and wished her mother would have tried to get out there and be somebody.  Benjamina was also pretty sure her parents favored her sister Jolene (lore says they used to fight over men), as Avie Lee granted Jolene the Strawson Dewdrop necklace.  This was reaching, though, as the heirloom always went to the first daughter of the family, and Benjamina didn't want their cheap jewelry anyway.  It was diamonds and rubies or nothing for this little piggy! 

Benjamina did inherit one thing from her mother: the insatiable hunger for frog legs.  Benjamina and her amphibious husband Sam created a musical duo and hit the road ISO the big time.  Rebranded as Piggy Lee, Benjamina soon outshone Sam, and tension/tempers flared.  The divorce was ugly, Piggy Lee tried to force their daughter to follow in her hoofsteps, fiery Piggy Sue wasn't havin' it, etc. 

Meanwhile, Jolene was very happy to marry mechanic Helmer Haugh, and they begat two sons, Robert (aka Bobby aka Brick) and Garrett (aka Stick).  The boys were close to their little cousin, as their parents provided Piggy Sue with much needed family normalcy.  Garrett spent a lot of time with his grand-père Doc, who inspired his passion for cooking.  

Brick would go on to marry Italian bovine beauty Lucia Marchigiana, a professional alto and vocal coach.  The pair produced a herd of four kiddos, all of whom enjoy the company of Uncle Stick and "Aunt" Piggy Sue (who is in fact their first cousin once removed, but who's counting).  Lucia provided the pretty Italian names and Brick interjected with the goofball monikers.

Firstborn Cesare is 12 and mostly interested in video games, but he also secretly enjoys the taekwondo class to which his parents drive him twice a week.  When he meets her, Sparky gets along well with the confidently mellow Clem.  9 year old Bonafila is close to her Grandma Jolene, from whom she received the Strawson Dewdrop.  Bobbi is already a natural leader who excels at sports, and is clearly going to be a stunner like her mom.  6 year old Donatella is the wild card who made her father and grandfather teach her everything they know about how cars work; where other kids are still learning the ABCs, Dude is ravenously interested in the school's STEM club.  And Pierina ("Nini") is only 4 but already displays perfect pitch...maybe she'll be the next to reach musical heights.  Wait, no, don't go into the arts, kid!  Run!  Stranger danger!  Run from the weird frog lady and her crazy talk! 

TLDR: If it weren't for Muppet references I'd have no references at all.  Also I forgot Devon was here.

When We Fly (c)Kae