“I’m Louis Theroux at the orgy!" Autistic woman at hen party just here to observe
Added 2024-05-21 10:00:02 +0000 UTC
Piece by Sara Gibbs, Image © Shutterstock
An autistic woman on a hen party has no plans to participate, preferring to neutrally observe others acting like pillocks, it has been rumoured.
Paige Thomas, 28, is currently attending the hen party of second cousin, Avery Mann, 34. According to sources, Thomas has spent the first day of the three-day excursion to a luxury home in Scotland watching on with an inscrutable expression on her face.
One source claimed: “She acts like she’s joining in, but you can tell it’s just a ruse to get her subjects to open up. Every now and then she’ll throw in a half-hearted ‘woop woop’ or ‘Prosecco’, but she’s not fooling anybody.”
Thomas said: “I’m just here to ask awkward questions and then pause for an uncomfortable length of time so they start babbling on self-incriminatingly.”
“I’m not, like, ON the hen party. But if I have to be here, I may as well get a good story,” she continued. “So far I’ve found out Sarah is cheating on her husband, Liz was once arrested for arson and Kelsey just disappeared with the butler in the buff.”
Ratings for Thomas’ story about the hen party were reportedly sky high, in that her boyfriend, Jack Harrington, 27, read all of her texts and clicked “haha”.
