Hot Tub Love Machine - 25 - Epilogue

Thanks so much! I think Lucas rubbed me the wrong way too, he was at conception supposed to replace his father with a good man, but when I decided to take his crisis of conscience as the first step to Lucas becoming his father, I finally felt like that fit properly. I could've de-douched him some if I had had included more of the girls' dads. Especially, if Jesse remained a combative asshole, Emi's dad kept up his disappearing act, Anna's dad was too busy and too gullible to notice what had happened to his wife, and then Iggy's dad finally gave Lucas a good man to emulate. Having the fathers be more hands on worked for Blizzard, but I didn't see it working here. Therefore, all of the men he did see, and the boys he could've had as friends being elsewhere or antagonistic, meant that the only way he knew how to be a man came from how he saw his mother treated and how his girls rewarded him. Thus, douchy. Sniper rifle? Car bomb? Something much less public would've been how things went. Bu~ut they were always gonna need a scapegoat. Anna's terror of risking prison to separate them meant they needed an out. Angry lover kills philanderer was the best matching hole for their peg. They might've chosen more carefully if Ryan's location and schedule was predictable.

Neal Johnstone

Hmhm, in a way the end is very fitting, because Lucas is still kind of a douche-bag, when it comes to women. First he sacrificies a random women to a life in prison, because he is apparently not intelligent enough to think of a better murder method (seriously: car bomb? poison? hunting rifle?), then he starts an orgy with a lot of brainwashed participants. All this makes his constant wranglings with being a "good guy" sound kind of hollow. But i guess that was kinda the point. In retrospect most of your characters seem kind of douchy, guess Lucas kind of rubbed me the wrong way, because everyone constantly insisted how great he is. Though that definetly might be due to me never getting really warm with this whole lovepotion-thingie :D

Love your 2 cents, this is giving me another place to look. Theo wasn't mind controlled and let the Ray/Anna fight, breakup, and years long fallout fester without a relevant word between fight and reconciliation is a problem I haven't addressed. Dammit, thanks. I also agree that I hadn't looked at Theo attempting to guess Iggy's passphrase in the predatory way when writing it. It was more: putting a puzzle in front of smart kid who can't look at it without trying to solve it. I do disagree about the having never visited thing. He's only a high school senior now. He spent the last four years as a minor, in a distant enough location that it'd be a flight back, without access. If he even had a job (he got into a major university so he was focused on his studies and on whichever extra curriculars filled out a resume.) He probably didn't have the ability to buy plane tickets and fly alone back to his old friends without his parents. Lucas paid for Lindsay and Theo's trip. The first opportunity to go back, and he did. Lots to pick at. Thanks again!

Neal Johnstone

I guess if you want to be a boy and give him some girls that you don’t want okay. There is in vitro fertilization, and it has been established that Lucas has access to money now, so Theo isn’t needed for anyone close to Lucas to be a mom. Now Theo left and rarely talked to Theo even less so with the girls (at least that was my interpretation from reading the text). He never visited until he knew he could get something from it. Then he proceeds to try and gain control of one of his girls. Also he knows about the relationship between Ray/Lucas and never says anything to his “best friend” for years? Doesn’t come off well in the limited exposure he has to the audience. At least to me. I will admit sometimes I over think things. Anyway that’s my 2 cents.

Nick Cartwright

Ray. Not for years, during which Theo would be constantly watched and proving himself. And she may not want kids in the future, but Lucas can't provide them when she does. She's gonna end up co-mom to four other women's children. I haven't really explored in concept how she'd do that. Would she need the same physical investment? Could she just be a great foster mom? Kate's a different animal, Ryan left her own personality as a Mom, but the rest is shifted to fit his desires. Lucas wants to give her something that she genuinely wants and there's literally no one but Theo he trusts. I get the sharing girls usually makes a man look weak or defeated, and yet the move is very dictator's handbook. Theo a user? There's really only three events we know about him. A fourteen year old boy who slept with a girl he was moving away from and gave in when her friend also wanted to say goodbye aggressively. I don't see it there. The other side of things: coming to see Lucas and bringing Lindsay knowing Lucas's claims of Love Potion? I saw that as sort of the same as Lucas pouring the love potion in the tub while knowing it wasn't going to work back in chapter one. But yeah, the second half does suggest a bit of a predator in there. He was literally the only person Lucas could ask "Is what I'm doing with Iggy et al, OK?" That meant a lot to Lucas, even if Theo wasn't quite qualified to make that conclusion. I guess there's a fourth thing. If it's about guessing Iggy's passphrase. That could be it. In my mind that's more of being a very smart kid. Here's a puzzle. Don't solve it. I guess that means I gotta try. Thanks so much for the feedback! I really like interrogating the decisions I've made. Until now I actually hadn't considered the guessing game as potentially making Theo look predatory. That's a speedbump I may have to revisit.

Neal Johnstone

Everything I’ve read of Theo leads me to believe that he is NOT someone to be trusted. He comes off as a user and I can’t fathom why Luke or his girls would like him enough to give him everything he does at the end. I especially would not want the dude anywhere near the mother or Ray(if I interpreted the hint properly).

Nick Cartwright

That sucks. I feel Theo's necessary, whether you like him or not. Lucas has no other guy friends. Boys who could've been his friends, like Pete, are doomed to hate him. Also the men in his life that could have looked out for him: Ryan specifically and Jesse tangentially, force Lucas in a box. I can't imagine a Lucas who doesn't need a Theo, just like I can't imagine a Lucas who didn't landmine his girls to literally show Theo that there is a hierarchy and that Theo's place in it is very clear.

Neal Johnstone

To be honest this story has never made me care about Theo. In fact I don’t even understand why the characters care about Theo. I even kinda dislike Theo.

Nick Cartwright