Chapter Seventy-three – Why Is There Always Math?

<Stats,> Pandy thought, staring down at the piece of paper pinned beneath her ink-stained paw. It was only faintly illuminated by the tiny Spark she’d cast more than an hour ago, but Pandy didn’t need light to see the words that formed before her eyes.

Name: Pandy

Race: Rabbit? (Deceased)

Age: 24

LF: 1/1

Mana: 82/82

Stats▾

• Strength: 18

• Intelligence: 12

• Agility: 20

• Pain Tolerance: 1

Skills▾

• Hop: Lv. 20 (3/100)

• Bite: Lv. 19 (24/91)

• Scratch: Lv. 11 (2/19)

• Minor Heal: Lv. 22 (175/280)

• Wings of Glory: Lv. 1 (1/2)

• Verdant Surge: Lv. 1 (1/2)

• Vita Herbalis: Lv. 1

• Spark: Lv. 1

• Shifting Faces: Lv. 2     00:00:02

Boons▾

• Ismara’s Blessing I

• Mark of Keros

Corruption Points: 176

Silently, she contemplated the numbers, especially the last one. Today, as she used one skill after another, openly, for the first time since arriving in this world, she realized that she’d been making a fundamental error. She had been treating her new life like, well, her old life.

Pandy had figured out long ago that she had little to no control over her own life, and therefore the best thing she could do was, in fact, to do the best she could. When she was kicked out of another foster home, she just hoped that the next one would be better. When her homework was eaten by the neighbor’s mini goat after blowing off the table where she was working, she simply did it over. When she stepped off a curb into a pothole the size of Dallas, drenched herself in mud, twisted her ankle, and showed up limping, late, and filthy to a job interview, she just accepted that that was the way it was, went home, and took a shower.

But now, Pandy was living in Gacha Love. She knew that, of course. She’d been working on leveling up her stats and skills, finding secrets and hidden items, and enjoying being near the characters and places she knew so well. Or at least adjacent to said characters and places.

She’d also been hoarding Corruption Points, rather than using them. She was still acting like she was helpless in the face of fortune, and that simply wasn’t true. She knew every spell used by Clara and all four of her love interests, which meant that all of those spells were available to her. More, if she was actually playing Gacha Love, she would be getting every skill and spell she could, and leveling every single one to at least ten.

Yes, many of Clara’s skills, in particular, were ridiculously unhelpful to a rabbit. She didn’t need to Dance, and she definitely didn’t need things like Fashion or Graceful Presence. Actually, Graceful Presence might be useful, simply because Pandy’s current presence was anything but graceful.

In any case, the important thing was that every one of those useless skills could raise Pandy’s stats, or give her more Mana. Rather than continuing to hoard Corruption Points, Pandy needed to spend them. Oh, not all of them, but many. Most, even. And rather than focusing on the top-tier, late game skills, she needed to get the first ones. The cheap ones. Pandy needed to stop reacting, and start acting. Which sounded like the catchphrase of a self-help pyramid scheme, but since she’d thought of it herself, hopefully she wouldn’t end up at the airport handing out flowers or calling all of her friends to see if they wanted in on a Very Special Opportunity.

So Pandy had spent the last hour figuring out how much it would cost to unlock each and every skill in Gacha Love, then laboriously scratching that number out on a piece of paper she’d taken from Thaniel’s school bag. The letters looked like someone had tied a stick to a chicken and then set the bird loose in a dusty pen, but if she squinted just right, she could read them, which was all that mattered.

Each of the male love interests had five named skills or spells. Three were combat-related, one very definitely wasn’t, and one could go either way. Of the three combat skills, one was available from the beginning, one was gained halfway through the game, when he and Clara began entering dungeons, and the third was his Ultimate Skill, learned as he battled the final boss. The neutral skill was usually used in the first interaction Clara had with them, while the non-combat skill appeared after Clara chose to dance with them at the midwinter ball.

Clara herself had a ridiculous number of skills and spells, many of which were used in school, while others were only useful in wooing a certain boy. As a Light elementalist, most of her spells were used for healing, but she had some combat spells that were specifically meant for fighting demons and undead. Unfortunately, Pandy wasn’t certain what would happen if she tried to use those spells, but she had a suspicion it might involve more Pandy-bits being splashed around, so she was understandably hesitant.

Now, Pandy had a list, – albeit a barely legible one involving acronyms only she would understand – and she was developing a plan.

Each of the boys’ original skills cost somewhere from thirty to forty Corruption Points to unlock. More useful skills tended to be more expensive, while weak skills like Edgar’s Spark cost less. Clara’s early skills ranged anywhere from ten to thirty Corruption Points to unlock, and Pandy couldn’t see any pattern to which ones cost more.

The second combat skill and the neutral skills had a much broader ‘price’ range. Bastian’s Chef’s Surprise skill – which imbued his baked goods with random power-ups – was at the top end, costing a whopping one hundred and eight points. In contrast, Dorian’s Glacial Gladius was only sixty-seven points, but it was also completely useless without a gladius to apply it to.

The end-game skills were absolutely ridiculous, of course. Edgar’s Area of Effect spell, Arcane Inferno, cost three hundred and six Corruption Points. Three hundred. She didn’t even want to think about how much Mana it probably took to cast it. But Pandy’s favorite ultimate attack, Kaden’s Aetherial Sovereignty, cost more than twice that, at six hundred and thirty-eight Corruption Points. Yes, it was powerful, but that really was excessive.

Fortunately, Clara’s skills were much more reasonable. Her ultimate attack was off the table, of course, which was a shame. A spell – actually more of a prayer, at least as it was portrayed in the game – calling down Ismara’s Divine Retribution was something that Pandy should probably avoid on general principles. Most of her early skills were both reasonably priced and not elementally aligned, however, and should be safe enough.

Pandy had already asked about Graceful Presence and Shield of Light, so she knew they were thirty and twenty-one CP respectively. The nice thing about Shield of Light was that it could be targeted, which meant that as long as simply using it didn’t make Pandy go splootch, she could use it to protect Thaniel. That put it high on her list, and the only reason she hadn’t purchased it already was because of the non-zero chance of implosion.

Artistic was the cheapest skill Pandy had found, costing only ten Corruption Points. That made it an obvious pick, but Pandy already knew that it would only increase her Talent stat, which was probably invisible right now because Pandy had exactly zilch in the way of talent. This was another stat that was needed to succeed in various events, but whose actual purpose was vaguely defined, at best.

The mid-game skill, Politics, cost a surprising forty-eight Corruption Points, and Pandy not only had no use for it or its associated stat, Reputation, she didn’t even know how she would level it up. Politics was helpful in Edgar’s path, and necessary in Prince Kaden’s, but there were other ways to raise the small amount of Reputation needed for Bastian and Dorian, and honestly, Pandy would rather not have any kind of reputation right now, good or bad.

The list was long, but besides Graceful Presence and Shield of Light, Pandy saw three other skills she wanted to unlock right away. First was Innate Magic. In Gacha Love, it granted an extra point of Stamina with every level, and Pandy hoped it would give her something equally useful now. It only cost twenty points, so it was right in the middle of the pack as far as expense.

The next skill was Dance. Pandy had absolutely no use for it whatsoever, but it should increase either Agility or Strength, and she could always use more of those. She should be able to raise it quickly, and it only cost eighteen Corruption Points, so there really wasn’t any reason not to take it.

The final skill was one that also had no use at this time, but it was one of Pandy’s favorites, and when she realized she could afford to unlock it, she absolutely had to do so. It was one of the few reasons Pandy ever took Dorian’s path, since he taught it to Clara after they began investigating the murders together. What a rabbit was going to do with Dual Wielding, especially given that she had no weapon proficiencies, Pandy didn’t know, but she was willing to create carrot-nunchucks or lettuce-leaf fans if that was what she had to do.

Unfortunately, Dual Wielding cost fifty-three Corruption Points, which brought Pandy’s metaphorical shopping basket to a total of one hundred and forty-two Corruption Points, which left her only thirty-four CP to spend. That seemed like a lot, especially given the fact that she should be able to ‘refill’ just by hanging out near Suzanne, but what if Keros’ magic suddenly kicked in again, the whole school burned down around their ears, and Pandy had to save everyone?

Pandy needed options, and Corruption Points gave her those options. It was just that without a definite plan, like when she’d been saving up for Shifting Faces, holding onto too many points was like stuffing money in her mattress, rather than putting it in a savings account. Not that Pandy ever had any physical money to stuff into a mattress, but Ms. Wellington had, and look how much good it did her.

Staring down at the smeared and crumpled page, Pandy thought, <Use Graceful Presence. Use Corruption Points.>

Graceful Presence successful. Graceful Presence is now level 1.

Pandy’s Corruption Points ticked down, and her fur stood on end as something shifted inside her, possibly her spleen. Absolutely nothing else happened. She didn’t suddenly feel more graceful, nor did either of the sleeping boys stir or react in any way. That was all right, though. In fact, it was perfect. Pandy had chosen this one because she hoped no one would be able to tell she was using it. Now she just had to find out what stat it would raise when it leveled up. She suppressed the urge to do exactly that, however, and went on to her next skill.

<Use Innate Magic. Use Corruption Points.>

Innate Magic successful. Innate Magic is now level 1.

This time, the effect on Pandy was significantly more pronounced. One moment she was sitting up, staring into the darkness, and the next she was lying on her side, grateful that she didn’t need to breathe, because if she did, it would probably hurt. If Graceful Presence required only a small or localized change, gaining Innate Magic felt like being microwaved. Heat expanded from her middle, and just when she thought an explosion was imminent, the timer went off, the turntable stopped, and Pandy shuddered, legs spasming involuntarily.

She lay there for a while longer, listening as Thaniel’s bedside clock ticked away the night. She counted one hundred and twenty ticks and zero tocks before she felt like she might be able to stand up again. She didn’t, though. Instead, she lay there for a while longer, vaguely wondering who came up with the idea of tocks in the first place, because clearly they didn’t actually exist. At last, without moving, she thought, <Use Dance. Use Corruption Points.>

Dance successful. Dance is now level 1.

Her paws began to move. Furry hips swung, causing Pandy to wiggle across the floor like one of those flopping, singing fish toys people kept regifting each other at Christmas until no one remembered who had originally brought it, and therefore whose responsibility it was to exorcise the thing. This one didn’t hurt, not really, just felt incredibly awkward right up until it stopped. Well, that was one never to use in public.

And now for the one she was really looking forward to. Or had been, until she was reminded that gaining new skills could be awkward, uncomfortable, or outright painful. <Dual Wielding. Use Corruption Points.>

Dual Wielding successful. Dual Wielding is now level 1.

This time it wasn’t her back paws that were in motion, but her front ones. The toes splayed, then curled into tight, painful balls of fur. Something rippled up her arms, through her chest and shoulders, down to her belly, and, strangely, buzzed up through her head and ears, leaving her whiskers quivering. That…wasn’t too bad, really, though she had a sudden urge to find a pair of rabbit-sized daggers just so she could test it out. It was almost too bad Ms. Wellington’s Poisoned Pigsticker was so dangerous, or she might have tried using it.

Which left her with one spell left to gain. It was the only one she was really worried about, but she truly believed that it was worth the risk. After all, it was an early game spell, just like Dispel, and Lian’s Dispel had only made her fur stand on end.

<Cast Shield of Light. Use Corruption Points.>

Casting of Ƨhield of ŁįƌĦŧ successful. Shield of Đȋɓɦɚϧs is now level 1.

The world flared around her, and her Spark went out.